


The Boyscout 'verse

by alycat



Series: Boyscout 'verse [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, M/M, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-22
Updated: 2012-08-22
Packaged: 2017-11-12 15:59:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 104,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/493045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alycat/pseuds/alycat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Helping is always a good thing, but when Jared volunteers at a teen hotline, he soon finds himself in over his head and the kid with the soft voice refuses to leave his mind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Innocent Caller

**Author's Note:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 12, Jared 23)

-¤-

"So I just talk to them?" Jared said and looked down at the small desk, barely shielded by dividers from similar desks around him.

"Yes," the blonde woman, he thought her name was Miranda, answered. "It's pretty much a support hotline, and it's all anonymous. Decide what you want to call yourself, you're in no way obliged to tell them your real name. And don't answer with the hotline's name, just your own. It makes it easier for them."

"Okay, I can…yeah," he nodded.

"Don't you worry, it's kids that call, they really just want someone to listen to, and I'm sure you'll do great, with your history I think you will have better understanding of what some of them are going through. Just…let them talk to you. And talk to them."

"I can talk, I'm really good at that," Jared said with a smile.

"Oh and Jared," probably-Miranda said when she was turning away. "Thank you for volunteering, it means a lot to us."

Jared nodded and folded himself down into the chair, long legs barely fitting under the desk and he sighed a bit at the thought of spending the following three hours in the not too comfortable office chair but he pushed it away, he was there to help kids, and a few uncomfortable hours was worth it. He put the headset on and adjusted it until it sat right before he pushed the answering button to accept the call already queued up.

"Hello, you're talking to Jay."

-¤-

"Jay, bring more beer!"

Jared rolled his eyes but grabbed a few beers as well as the plate with steaks he was already carrying, Harley and Sadie dancing around his feet every step of the way. He wondered if they were hoping he would drop something, or were actually trying to trip him over. 

"You guys could have helped me carry stuff," Jared said when he balanced his way out of the back door. 

Chad looked up from where he was guarding the grill but he merely shrugged before he returned to watching the flames. Matt and Tom didn't even bother to look up from where they were splayed out in the grass, sunglasses protecting their eyes from the hot Texas sun.

"Remind me again why I let you rent rooms?" Jared grumbled when he managed to put the plate and the beers down without dropping anything, to the dogs clear disappointment.

"Better with the devil you know?" Matt asked and lifted his sunglasses, winking at Jared.

"Besides, none of us complain about you having the whole fucking basement to yourself," Chad pointed out and reached for the steaks, putting them on the grill and the smell of barbecue filled the air. 

"You _so_ complain," Jared pointed out but he was grinning when he handed out the beers to his friends. "It's all you ever do! But it's my house, so I get the basement. It's only fair."

The other three shrugged and opened their beers, clinking the bottles together before they took deep swigs of beer and even Chad sat down with the others in the grass, trusting the steaks to manage themselves. Jared looked around the backyard, his dogs and his bet friends all splayed out in the grass and he was just about to relax himself when the low sound of the door bell was heard all the way into the back.

"Oh fuck," was all Chad got out before Harley and Sadie were up, both of them barking and running back inside. 

"Your mutts, your house, you're the one opening," Tom said and Jared knew better than to protest.

Grumbling to himself he got off the ground and put the beer down on the table next to the grill, knowing his friends it wouldn't be there when he returned but it was worth a shot.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," he muttered when the door bell rang out a second time, increasing the volume of the dogs barking and yipping in front of he door. "Get back, get back you slobbery giants."

Jared opened the door and was met by wide, green eyes that stared up at him and then down at the dogs that were both trying to get past him to greet the stranger. Although, it wasn't a stranger, Jared was pretty sure he had seen the kid before, and he frowned a bit, looking down at him.

"Uhm..hi...Jason..right?"

"Jensen," the boy said in a clear tone, still eyeing the dogs warily. "I'm...here to ask if you maybe wanted to buy popcorn?"

Only then did Jared take in the boyscout uniform that the kid was wearing; a neatly pressed khaki shirt and green pants, a red scarf tied around his neck. 

"Popcorn?" Jared said, something deep inside him screaming to stop stare at the kid in front of him. 

"Yes, sir," Jensen said and despite still keeping half an eye on the dogs, he smiled up at Jared. "For the Boy Scouts. I'm gathering my merit badges and I need to..."

The words didn't really reach Jared's mind, all he could see was the green eyes lighting up when the kid started talking about his badges and how his plush, pink lips stretched to flash small, white teeth. 

"Right, yeah, of course," Jared said, knowing full well they had plenty of popcorn in the cupboard. "Just let me get my wallet. And you two, back outside."

Harley and Sadie gave him wounded looks but they trotted back towards the door to the yard, both of them looking happier once they remembered the steaks grilling outside. Jared could feel the kid’s eyes on him when he went to grab his wallet from where he had left it on the counter in the kitchen and when he turned around the boy turned pink and looked down at his own feet in a way that was adorable and endearing.

"What flavors?" Jensen asked, clearly happy that he would get to sell something. "I got Butter, and Butter Light and Caramel, sir"

Jared couldn't stop his nose from wrinkling at the mention of Butter Light, he wanted his unhealthy snacks to be unhealthy, thank you very much.

"Caramel, two boxes."

Jensen's smile dimmed slightly and Jared didn't really know why he continued talking, he just wanted that radiant smile back.

"Never mind, make that four. And two Butter," he added when Jensen's smile turned brilliant.

"Yes sir," the kid said happily.

"Thank you, kid," Jared said when he handed the boy his money and accepted the boxes.

Jensen's smile disappeared in an instant and he pushed out his lips in a petulant pout even as he walked down to the little cart he had been pulling, loaded with boxed of popcorn.

"I'm not a kid," he pointed out. "I'm actually twelve."

Jared wanted to point out that with his twenty-three years, he was very much allowed to call Jensen a kid but the boy looked too offended for Jared to want to tease him.

"Sorry Jensen," Jared said and reached out to rest a hand on the boy’s shoulder. "Of course you're not a kid, my bad. I'm sure you have several merit badges as well?"

"More than anyone in my age group," Jensen said, smile back in place. "And thank you so much, sir, I hope that..."

"Jay," Chad called out. "Get your ass out here, food is done."

"Oh," Jensen said and looked around Jared toward the garden. "I'll just...thank you. For buying. From me."

The kid blushed and before Jared could say another word, the door closed behind Jensen and Jared was left with six boxes of popcorn and a memory of bright green eyes.

-¤-

"Jared," Miranda called out when he entered the center and started heading for his usual spot. "I just want to say awesome work the other day, you really seem to be a natural with the kids."

"Thanks," Jared said and sank down in the chair that was most likely comfortable for someone that wasn't as tall as he was. "Is it different working evenings than days?"

"A bit yeah," Miranda said with a nod. "For some reason we get a lot more of the sexual questions in the evenings, maybe it's easier to talk about in the dark. I honestly have no idea, but be prepared for it. It will usually mean that a lot more of the boys that call in, choose to talk to a male buddy, while the girls choose the females."

Jared nodded and tried to get comfortable before he reached for the headset and then he looked around the room, realizing that his small desk was the only one occupied. 

"I'm the only one working?" he asked confusedly.

"No, the other volunteers work from the other room though, you're of course allowed to join them if you want?"

Jared shook his head, he liked his little desk and even with the darkness outside of the window, he preferred the room that actually had windows, the other room felt too much like a cell, even though it was bigger. Miranda smiled at him and disappeared to the other room, leaving Jared alone to put the headset in place before he pushed the button to answer his first call of the evening

-¤-

Looking at the clock Jared realized he still had forty-five minutes left of his scheduled time, the last hour had crawled by without any phone calls at all and Miranda had shrugged and said that some days were just slow like that. Jared was just about to reach for a pen and some paper, passing time with doodling when the light on his phone flashed red and he accepted the call.

"Hello, you're talking to Jay."

At first he thought the line was dead, but then he heard a soft, hitched breath at the other end and he could almost see a scared kid, clutching the telephone. 

"First time you call?" Jared asked softly. "That's okay, how about I talk and you just cut in when you feel ready?"

He wasn't expecting an answer, and soft breathing was the only thing he could hear on the other end, but at least he thought it was calming down some as he began talking. 

"You don't really have anything to be nervous about, but I do understand you, I'm quite new here and I was very nervous the first time," he admitted."I have no idea why you're calling in, but if you're not ready to talk about it, you don't have to. We can talk about anything you want. Maybe movies? Have you seen the latest Pirates movie?"

Jared spent a few more minutes talking about the movies he had seen, or wanted to see, and he could hear the breathing on the other end slow down even more until a soft voice interrupted his tirade.

"I'm..." it started but went silent right away.

"Yes?" Jared prodded softly. "You're ready to talk to me now? How about telling me your name?"

"It’s Je...JR," the boy on the other end breathed out. "I'm JR."

Jared knew right away that it wasn't the boy's name but at least he had something to call him and that made things quite a bit easier. 

"Hello, JR," he said. "Are you read to talk or should I go on talking?"

"I didn't like it," the soft, almost melodic voice said. 

"What?" Jared asked and reached for a pen, turning it over between his fingers. "What don't you like?"

"The Pirates movie," JR said. "It's...the first one was better."

"Yeah," Jared agreed with a smile. "The first one was _much_ better."

The boy fell silent and before Jared had the time to restart the discussion he heard a barely audible whisper reaching him over the phone line. 

"I think...I might be gay."

Jared opened his mouth to give comfort, but he didn't have time before there was a click in his ear and the line went dead.

-¤-

_I might be gay._

The words rang in Jared's mind three days later when he was back at the center, calling back memories of when he himself had come to the same realization and how scared he had been but he was quite sure that the boy that had called in had been even younger than Jared had been.

"A boy has called, asked for you specifically," Miranda said. "I do hope he calls again, he refuses to talk to anyone else."

"JR?" Jared asked. 

"Don't know, he didn't say a name, just asked for you."

Jared nodded and sat down in his chair, answering the first call but the entire evening he was thinking about the young boy, even though he didn't fully know why the shy, soft voice lingered in his mind. He couldn't help but feeling disappointed when the call never came 

He put away the headset when his three hours ended, thinking bout JR and how the word 'gay' had been followed by the click and the static tone and when he turned towards the door he saw Miranda leaning against it, clearly waiting to have a word with him.

"He didn't call, did he?" Miranda asked softly.

"No" Jared admitted and got up off his chair. "And I'm not scheduled for another week."

"I have a suggestion," Miranda said softly. "It's not something we usually do, but this boy just wont talk to anyone else, and even though I don't know what it's about, my guess is that it has something to do with the reason you are volunteering here. If he calls again, we can forward it to your cell phone. It's not something you have to do, Jared, but can you think about it?"

Jared looked a bit confused about that but then he thought about the soft voice and the barely audible word and he knew he had to help the boy in some way. 

"I could do that," Jared said with a nod. 

"Thank you," Miranda said. "I didn't wanna say something, but he's called several times a day, I guess it was just bad luck he didn't call today."

-¤-

"What are you guys up to?" Jared asked when he saw his friends piling up bowls of popcorn and chips on the coffee table.

"Movie night," Chad grinned when he came out of the kitchen, beers in hand. 

"Oh really?" Jared said and looked down on the movies splayed out on the table. "No High School Musical this time?"

"We agreed to never talk about that," Matt growled.

"And we're watching all the Pirates of the Caribbean movies," Chad said. "Wanna join?"

The mention of the movie had Jared's hand drifting down to his pocket, sliding a finger over the phone, thinking about the boy and he knew that the center would open the phone line within moments.

"Thanks, but I actually have homework to do," Jared lied smoothly and grabbed a beer before he headed down to his own basement apartment.

"You're no fun," he heard Tom call out behind him.

"Thank you for keeping an eye on the dogs for me," Jared responded and grinned when Harley and Sadie happily bounded out into the living room to annoy his friends. 

Down in the silent apartment Jared picked up his phone and laid it on the bedside table before he lay down on the bed and looked at the phone. He couldn't really explain to himself what it was with the boy that stuck with him, but he was hoping that the phone would ring, had been waiting for it to ring for two days and he was well aware that he was ignoring his friends in favor of guarding the phone, but he really didn't want to tell them about the short discussion that refused to leave him alone. Jared hadn't really been aware of almost drifting off to sleep, not until 'Big Girl Now' started playing and he found himself almost dropping the phone before he could answer the call.

"Jared," he said, voice a bit gritty from almost-sleep.

"Jared, it's Miranda here, do you have time?"

"He's calling?" Jared said and sat up in his bed. "Let me talk to him."

"Thank you so much for doing this Jared," Miranda said and he could hear the smile in her voice before the line went silent for a few moments.

"Jay?" came a soft voice from the phone.

"Hey there JR," Jared said, wondering what the boys real name was.

"I called but you weren't there," JR said and Jared swore he could _hear_ the boy bite his lip.

"Yeah, I'm at college, so sometimes classes and assignments get in the way," Jared said. "I'm sorry we missed each other."

They both drifted into silence but Jared didn't want to push the kid into talking, the boy had clearly wanted to talk to Jared so all Jared had to do was wait for the boy to gather enough courage.

"About..." JR said quietly before he cleared his throat. "What I said last time..."

"Yes?" Jared said and tried to sound reassuring. 

"I think..I haven't...told anyone."

"That you think you're gay?"

"Yes," JR said and he sounded so miserable Jared's heart ached. 

"You know there isn't anything wrong with being gay," Jared said. "I know some people might tell you differently, but if it's who you are, never be ashamed."

"Yeah?" came the soft voice over the line.

"There's nothing wrong with you," Jared said with confidence.

"How do you know?" JR asked with a quiver to his voice.

"Because there's nothing wrong with me," Jared said and he heard a small gasp from the other side.

"You're...are you..." JR asked after a long minute.

"Yes, I'm gay, JR," Jared said. "So I know what..."

His words were interrupted by a click and the disconnect tone.

"Oh piece of fucking shit," Jared growled and tossed the phone down on the bed.

He laid waiting for the phone to ring again but it seemed to taunt him with it's silence and in the end Jared caved in and went upstairs to watch movies with the other guys, but the movies did nothing to distract him from the thoughts of JR.

-¤-

"How did it go with the kid?" Miranda asked the next time Jared set foot at the center.

"I have no idea," Jared admitted. "He hang up when I told him I was gay."

"I take it that I was right, he wanted to talk to you about his sexuality," Miranda said softly. "He hasn't called since then, at least he haven't asked for you."

Jared just nodded and went to his desk, yet another evening where he was alone in the room and the only sound was the voices filing in from the bigger room where the others sat answering calls. When he sat listening to yet another boy talking about his worries about making the baseball team Jared had given up the hope that JR would call again and he found himself counting the minutes until his shift was over, but the clock seemed to crawl itself forward and Jared groaned when he got another call twenty minutes before he was due to head home.

"Hello, you're talking to Jay," he said and he hoped he didn't sound as uninterested as he really was.

"I'm sorry."

The words were soft and low and they had Jared sitting bolt upright in the chair.

"JR," he said and he knew he was smiling wide at hearing the boy's voice once more. "Kid, you got nothing to be sorry for."

He heard a soft gasp for air and for a moment he wondered if he had said something wrong but then he heard the boy clear his throat.

"I don't know anyone that is...you know..." JR said and Jared leaned back in the chair. 

"Gay," Jared said simply. "Don't hesitate to say it, it's not a bad word. And maybe you do, not all gay people tell people about themselves."

"Oh," JR said. "Because...people wont approve?"

"Sometimes they just haven't met someone special enough to come out for," Jared said.

"Come...out?" JR asked.

Suddenly Jared was reminded that it was a _kid_ he was talking to, and he couldn't help but wonder how old JR really was but he knew he shouldn't ask, it wasn't his thing to ask about. 

"It's what people call it, when gay people decide to tell the people around them, it's called 'coming out' and not everyone chooses to do so."

Jared heard another soft 'oh' and he wondered what the boy was thinking.

"How did you know?" JR whispered. "I'm sorry...I shouldn't ask and..."

"No, hey now," Jared soothed. "Don't worry, I don't mind talking about it. I've been out for years. I was fifteen when I realized that having the prettiest girl in the school on my lap did nothing to be, but that her brother was really hot."

He grinned wide when a surprised laugh sounded from JR, a pearly sound that seemed to drain away Jared's lingering tension.

"Do you wanna talk about...why you think you might be gay?" Jared asked. 

"There's this guy," JR said on a sigh.

Jared smile and he almost said 'isn't there always?' but he managed to keep the words back.

"Someone in your class?" Jared prodded

"No," JR mumbled.

"At your school?" 

"No," JR said even more quietly. 

For some reason something fluttered deep inside Jared and he almost didn't ask the next question. 

"JR," Jared asked. "Is it an older boy?"

The silence that stretched out between them was really answer enough but Jared could still hear the small, whispered 'yes' and it made him lean back in the chair, eyes closed and he couldn't even make sense of the emotions that rolled through him.

"Is that...does that make me bad?" 

"What? Of course not," Jared hastily reassured the young boy. "I think it's just natural. Is it someone you know?"

"Not really," JR said. "He lives close...he's...pretty..."

The word was said with such innocence and Jared was quickly reminded that it was a very young boy he was talking to, a very young and clearly confused boy.

"I don't...look at girls," JR went on. "I don't understand girls. Even though they don't have cooties."

Jared smiled at that but was brought out of his thoughts when he saw Miranda step into the room and pointing towards the clock an then holding up five fingers before she headed back out. 

"You don't have to look at girls," Jared said and cursed inwardly at the limited time. "Look kid, they are closing here soon and...”

"Oh, I'm sorry," JR said and Jared could hear the disappointment in the boy’s voice.

"No, no," Jared said quickly and then he did something he knew he shouldn't have done. "We can keep on talking when I get home, I can give you me phone number."

JR went absolutely silent and for a few long moments Jared was just waiting for the click an the disconnect tone but instead he heard something that sounded like a sigh of relief.

"Really? You want to talk to me?" JR said and his voice was happier than Jared had heard it before.

"Yeah, I really do," Jared said and found that it was the truth. "Just please, don't tell anyone, I'm really not supposed to do that..."

"I wont tell anyone," JR promised quickly. "Thank you _so_ much, Jay."

Jared rattled off his phone number and promised to be home and ready to answer within thirty minutes, and he really hoped that his house mates had walked Harley and Sadie like they promised to because there was no way Jared was going to miss JR calling him.

-¤-

"Hey," JR said softly when Jared answered the phone some thirty five minutes later.

"Hey kiddo," Jared answered and lay down on his bed.

"I'm not..." JR started but then he fell silent again.

"A kid?" Jared asked and tried to shake off a nagging in the back of his mind, some thought that he couldn't really grasp.

"Yeah, I'm...I'm not a kid," JR said and for the briefest of seconds green eyes and pouting, pink lips flashed in Jared's mind. "I have _done_ stuff."

"Oh," was all Jared could say at the sudden surge of emotions, and he tried to ignore how much of his blood was moving south. "What...have you...done?"

"I have...touched myself," JR said, pride in his voice. "I've made myself...come..."

Jared squeezed his eyes shut at the onslaught of mental images the words produced in his mind, and he could feel himself harden.

"Oh," was all he managed to get out.

"But I... I don't understand," JR said in a confused tone. 

"What is it you don't understand?" Jared asked, hoping to get back into safer topics.

"Well," JR began. "My friends...talked about how....you know... A guy fucks a girl. But I don't...understand how...can two guys do that?"

Jared felt his breath hitch in his lungs at the innocently asked questions and he dropped one hand down, pressing the heel of it against his hardening cock, trying to will the erection away but the soft voice continued talking.

"It feels good, when I...jerk off," JR went on. "But...guys don't have...a pussy. I don't understand how sex would work. Don't gay people have sex? Because I think I would want to some day."

A half choked moan escaped Jared before he could bite it back and his hand went from trying to press the hard-on away to rub against the hard, denim covered length.

"Jay?" JR asked when Jared failed to get any words out. 

"Yeah, just...one moment," Jared mumbled into the phone.

The words 'wrong' and 'bad' and 'kid' flashed like a neon sign in his mind, but they did nothing for his erection or the images flashing even stronger and stronger behind his closed eyelids. 

"I'm...I should...sorry..."

Softly spoken, no more than a whisper, the words were enough to make Jared's eyes pop wide open. 

"Hey now, no no," he said quickly. "Don't you hang up on me again kid."

"I'm not a kid!" came the protest almost instantly. 

_Oh but you are, that's why this is so wrong._

"I know, I know, sorry," Jared said quickly. "But don't you have questions for me? I promise to answer whatever questions you might have ki...JR."

"Really?"

"Really," Jared promised and he felt like he condemned himself with the next words. "Whatever you ask, I swear I will answer. All goes, everything is safe."

The silence stretched out but Jared was comforted by the fact that JR didn't hang up on him again like had been so closed to do, and despite the blood rushing in his ears he could hear the boy's steady breathing. 

"Where...does it go?" JR asked and Jared squeezed his eyes shut again, because of course the boy would go there right away.

"The cock?" Jared asked bluntly. 

A small gasp answered his words and Jared couldn't help but wonder if the boy was blushing, if soft cheeks were tinted red and big eyes turned away, hidden behind long eye lashes. He refused to think of the face that appeared in his mind no matter how much he tried to push it away.

"That's a bad word," JR said solemnly.

"No," Jared disagreed. "It's just one word among many, but don't feel ashamed of it. I can call it something else if you want? Dick, penis, prick, cock...there are quite a few to choose from."

"I...think...I like cock."

Jared's cock twitched against the fabric of his jeans and he reached down to pop the button open before he could tell himself that it was a bad idea. His mind was laser focused on the kid on the other end of the line, soft innocent voice saying he liked cock and the words sparked fire in Jared's groin.

"Yeah," Jared said and tried to keep the groan out of his voice. "It's a good...word. Well, JR, girls have two...openings. You know about that, right?"

"Two? Don't...oh...you mean..." JR started and Jared could imagine feeling the heat of blushing cheeks all over the phone line. "You mean the...ass?"

"Yeah," Jared said and he could hear his voice turning rough with arousal. "Even straight people can have...anal sex."

"Anal?" JR asked and the innocent voice was wreaking havoc with Jared's emotions. 

"It means...well, anal sex is when the guy puts his cock up the girls, or other males, ass," Jared explained and was met with silence for a few long moments.

"Oh," came the soft response then. "I didn't think...you should touch there, isn't it dirty?"

"As long as your clean yourself, there's nothing wrong with that, JR," Jared said and tried to not think of just how _wrong_ it was to have this discussion with a _kid_.

"Does it really...feel good?" JR asked. "I mean..the guys at school...they say sex feels good, does it?"

"Oh, it does feel good, it feels very good," Jared said, voice dipping low when he wrapped a big hand around his cock.

"Can I touch myself there?" 

Jared pressed down hard around the base of his cock to keep the orgasm at bay but it was still a close call and his cock twitched, seeking release.

"Of course you can," Jared forced out. "It's...natural to explore your body."

"I...oh...I have to go," JR said suddenly. "My parents are home and I should... Can I call you again? Please, Jay?"

"Whenever you feel like it," Jared said.

"Thank you," JR said softly. "I'll...try touching myself, thank you for telling me about it."

The second he heard the click of JR ending the call, Jared gave his cock a few hard tugs before he spilled over his hand and up over his belly. Phone still clutched in his other hand Jared looked up at the ceiling for a few long moments while his breathing calmed down and he felt the post orgasmic bliss tingle through every part of his body.

"Oh fuck, I'm gonna burn in hell," he muttered to himself before he got off the bed to clean himself up.

-¤-

"We're heading out, you sure you don't wanna come?"

Jared looked up from his place on the couch in his downstairs apartment, seeing Chad standing at the top of the stairs with Matt and Tom close behind him, all of them clearly dressed up for a night on the town but Jared felt no urge to go with them, instead he was very much aware of the weight of his phone where it rested against his flat belly. 

"No," Jared said and he saw no surprise on his friend’s face. "I got stuff to do."

"Don't you always?" Tom asked over Chad's shoulder but there was a smile on his lips. "Will you ever tell us his name?"

"Who?" Jared asked and sat bolt upright, phone falling down on the soft carpet. 

"The guy you've been pining for, obviously," Tom said with a grin. "You know, we aren't actually as stupid as you think."

"Yeah, have fun with your crush, Jay," Matt grinned before the three guys turned around and left.

Jared looked down at where Harley and Sadie lay beside the couch, both dogs still tired from a long walk earlier and he reached down to stroke over Sadie's soft ears before he picked up the phone. 

"You think I have a crush?" Jared asked the dogs. "I can't...not on a kid. It's just...a really dirty, bad, wrong..."

He fell silent when no word seemed right and before he could come up with something, the phone in his hand vibrated and started playing, surprising him enough he almost dropped it before he could look down on the display. The 'Unknown number' made his belly do a flip, the last time it had been JR and even though it had been two weeks since he last heard from the kid, he really hoped that it would be him again.

"Hello?" he said when he slid his finger over the display to answer the call.

"Jay?" came JR's soft voice and Jared felt himself relax down into the couch. 

"Hey, JR," he said. "I haven't heard from you for awhile. I thought that maybe you had gotten tired of talking to me. How are you, kid?"

"I'm not a kid," came the almost automatic answer. "And I'm sorry, I wanted to call, I really did."

"I'm happy you called now," Jared said and he knew that was the honest truth, he really was happy to hear the kid’s voice again. 

"Really?" JR asked happily.

"Yeah, really," Jared said and got more comfortable on the couch. 

"What've you been up to since we talked, it's been over two weeks now."

"I was off to camp. And then my cousins came to visit, I had to be _social_ ," the kid scowled. "My cousins are stupid, and they were in the way because I really wanted to try what you told me."

Arousal soared through Jared's body in an instant, heat that rushed through his veins when blood filled his cock, making it strain against his basket shorts. 

"Well, it's no rush, I'm sure you'll..."

"Oh but I've done it now," JR said with pride and Jared felt his cock harden even more. "I'm _all_ alone now and I just got out of the shower."

"Oh fuck," Jared groaned before he could stop himself.

"What?" JR sounded startled. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no," Jared said quickly. "It's just... never mind. Had a nice shower?"

"Mhmm," JR answered. "I tried touching myself, like you said, felt good. Not much you know, but it felt...nice..."

"Not much?" Jared asked. "How much did you do?"

"I...well... I did touch a bit. It tickled, in a good way," JR answered innocently. "But I don't understand how anything would fit there..."

Jared knew he should end the call, knew that if he continued to talk he would most likely freak the kid out, and if he didn't? That would be even worse. But he had waited to talk to JR, he _wanted_ to talk to the kid that seemed to be temptation personified and with one last sigh Jared gave up any thought that he wouldn't follow through on the thoughts that had been in his mind for over two weeks.

"You have to go slow, use something to...ease the way and..."

"Will you help me?" JR asked and his voice was low and pleading.

"What?" Jared gasped, that was far from the freak out he had been expecting. "You want me to..help you? I don't think that..."

"Not as in...oh no," JR said quickly. "But...can you talk me through it, so I know I do it right?"

Every dirty fantasy Jared's mind had created for him since he started talking to JR seemed to be there, laid out for him and all Jared had to do was reach out and take it.

"Of course," Jared said. "Of course I will help you."

"Thank you!" JR said and Jared was sure the kid was smiling wide. "What do I need? I read somewhere about...lube? I don't have that...should I... I don't think I can buy that, can I?"

Just the thought of a young kid going into a story to buy lube had Jared groaning and squeezing his eyes shut, taking a few deeps breaths before he pressed on. 

"Not sure they would let you buy that," he said. "But...if you got some hand lotion that could work. It's not opti...it's not the best thing but it will do the job."

"I have that, just one..."

Jared lay listening to JR moving around on the other side and he thought he could hear a door open and close in the distance and then a low muttering before the boy was back, taking the phone from wherever he had dropped it.

"It smells...rose-ish," the boy said with what sounded like a pout. "Will I smell like roses? That's kinda girly..."

"You might smell a little," Jared said with a smile. "But it'll be worth it. Are you ready?"

"Yeah," JR said quickly. 

"And you're all alone?"

"Yup, my brother had some game and the entire family is there but I said I wasn't feeling good. I really wanted to talk to you again, you don't mind?"

Jared slid one hand down his shorts, wrapping long fingers around his already achingly hard cock before he pushed the shorts down completely. 

"Oh, I really don't mind," he answered honestly. "Well, if you're ready, I think you should...take your clothes off."

"I'm not wearing any clothes," JR mumbled. "I just showered...so I had a towel but not now..."

"You're naked? Well, that's... good," Jared said, almost choking on the last word when his cock twitched, letting him know just how much it liked that little bit of information. 

"Okay, then lay down on your back, and spread your legs, got the lotion close at hand?"

"Yeah, yeah," JR answered and Jared could hear a slight quiver in his voice. "I got it here..what should I...do?"

Jared closed his eyes and tried to imagine what it would look like, the young boy spread out on white sheets, legs parted to show off his small cock and little hole, he had to take a few deep breaths to calm himself down before he could go on. 

"Cover two fingers with lotion," he said and he could hear the snap of the lid on the other end of the line. "Ready? Then reach down and just...rub the lotion around your hole."

All he could hear was soft breathing, but he knew when JR did what he asked; the boy's breath hitched and a small sound, somewhere between a gasp and a moan, made Jared slide his hand down and squeeze around the base of his cock. Just hearing the young, innocent boy was better than any porn Jared had ever seen and he wanted more of those noises. 

"Feels good?" he asked.

"I...don't know," JR gasped. "It feels so...small. I don't think...I can fit anything in there..."

"Just give it time, and try to relax," Jared soothed because he could hear how tense JR's voice sounded despite the tiny moans that escaped him. "Lean back, just focus on how it feels with your fingers against your rim, breath in...and then out again...”

His own finger playing over the length of his hard cock, Jared listened to JR's breathing slowly calm down and he was just about to say something more when he heard the first real moan.

"Oh god, that's...oh..." JR moaned. "Feels...good..."

"Yeah? Do you trust me, JR?" Jared asked, carefully pushing the boy.

"Of course," came the answer.

"Push the tip of your finger inside," Jared guided the boy and when he heard no movement on the other end he nudged some more. "I promise, go slow and it will feel good."

He heard JR shift on the bed, slight movement that was drowned out by a surprised gasp.

"Feels, weird...burns a little," JR whimpered. "Will it really feel good?"

"Just let your body adjust," Jared mumbled into the phone.

He rested the phone between his shoulder and neck so that he had both his hand free, the one that wasn't wrapped around his cock he slid down to cup his heavy balls, rolling them between his fingers while he waited to see if JR would do what he asked of him. 

"Oh" came a small gasp and Jared squeezed his eyes shut and bit down hard on his lower lip. "Oh, oh, oh..."

The gasps changed into breathy little moans and he could hear JR shift on his bed and there was suddenly a low, keening sound that made Jared's cock twitch in his grasp.

"That feels _good_ ," JR gasped, voice full of awe. "I didn't think it...oh god..."

"Tell me," Jared said. "Tell me what you're doing..." 

"What?" JR asked and Jared could hear arousal slur the boy's words. "You want me to...tell you?"

"I really, _really_ want you to tell me," Jared said honestly.

"But...I'm just doing what you tell me," JR said quietly. "I got...one finger inside myself...it feels so warm...and good..."

The last word was drawn out into a soft moan when Jared heard the boy shift again and he could imagine JR on his bed, slender hips rolling down to push the finger deeper inside. 

"Think you can take another one?" Jared asked. "If you go slow? You would be such a good boy if you could..."

He heard a barely audible 'yes' before the most gorgeous sound he had ever heard filled his ear when JR moaned out loud and gasped for air.

"Jay..." he whined. "So good...yes... Got two...fingers in me..."

The words were breathed out on small moans, needy sounds that made Jared wish he could save them, the soft noises would be fuel for his jerk off sessions for years to come, he knew that without a doubt.

"So hot," he mumbled without thinking, fingers working his cock harder. "Wish I could see you..."

He bit off the rest of the sentence, his hand still on his cock, fingers wet with pre-come and he was frozen in spot, waiting for the boy to freak out.

"Yes!" JR groaned and Jared's eyes flew wide. "Want you to see me..."

Jared's mind was on overdrive, the words barely penetrating the sudden wave of pure _want_ that washed over him at the boy's pleading tone. 

"Yeah?" Jared asked, his voice lower, rougher, than he ever heard it before. "Want me to see you all spread out on your bed, fingering yourself? I bet you look so pretty against those white sheets..."

The words rolled easily off his tongue, like the gasps and moans from the other end of the line had opened a dam and all the thoughts that had been whirling around in Jared's mind came out.

"Not white," he heard JR moan. "Got...oh... Got Spiderman...sheets..."

That little piece of information made the realization of how young JR must be slam into Jared hard, but instead of discouraging him, it made him harden even further, cock hot and heavy in his hand and it was impossible to hold back the loud moan when pleasure crackled under his skin.

"Fuck..." he groaned.

"Yes," JR moaned. "Wish it could...god...Jay, wish you could be here...your fingers instead of mine... would make me feel so good..."

"JR," Jared gasped in surprise in the sudden boldness of the words. 

"Want it Jay," the boy moaned and Jared could hear him writhe on the bed. "Your fingers...inside me..."

"Yeah baby," Jared said before he could stop himself. 

"Jay...Jay..." the soft gasps of his name was muffled by moans and the sound of skin against sheets.

"Tell me what you're doing, baby," Jared asked when he realized the boy clearly didn't mind the affectionate name. "What you wish I was doing to you."

"Got two fingers inside," JR moaned quietly. "Feels so good...moving them inside...want more. Want your fingers."

Jared moved his fingers up over the head of his cock, sliding fingers through the wetness to slick the way when he started jerking himself with firm strokes, wondering if the boy could hear the sound of skin on skin.

"My...other hand is...on my... cock," JR continued. "It's so much better than before...with something inside me...want to go deeper..."

Despite his own heavy breathing and the moans he couldn't hold back, Jared could still hear the sound of JR moving, the sweet sound of his moans and when Jared focused he could imagine hearing the sound of the boys finger working themselves in and out of the tight little ass. He was talking before he was aware of it, unplanned words that were laced with need.

"Wish it was my hands on you, my fingers in your sweet ass, spreading you open for me," Jared moaned and the words seemed to turn the boy on as much as they did him, if the increase of moans was anything to go by. "Maybe even lick you, push my tongue into that tight little hole, tasting you and feeling you, hot and squirming on my tongue. 

"Gonna...gonna...oh please, please, _pleeeaase_..."

The last word transformed into a sharp cry and Jared knew that the boy was coming, orgasm pulling the sweetest moans and cries from his lips and knowing that the kid had just gotten off to Jared saying he wanted to rim him, was enough to push Jared over the edge as well and he moaned out loud, twisting his hand to pull out every last spasm of his orgasm while filthy words kept falling from his lips.

"Baby, yes, you sound so pretty when you come for me, fuck...wish I could see it, feel it, body shaking with release, so damn pretty. Would look so pretty with my come on you...inside you..."

"Jay..." his name was breathed out on a slow exhale, and he could hear exhaustion in the slur.

"You did good," Jared mumbled and looked down to where white stripes of come were drying on his skin and his shirt, cock softening after one of the most amazing orgasms he had ever had. "So very good, kid."

"Not a kid," he heard JR mumble. "I'm twelve...not a kid... Night, Jay...thank you..."

Jared didn't have time to answer before the boy had disconnected, but considering how tired he had sounded, Jared was pretty sure the kid was already sleeping, thin little body covered in come and fingers still sticky from he lotion. At that thought his cock twitched once more, last little drop of come pearly white against his tanned skin. 

There was something nagging in the back of his mind, something about what JR had said but sleep was already tugging at the edges of his mind and Jared barely gave himself time to clean off before he crashed into bed and fell into deep sleep, dreaming about a soft voice crying out his name in ecstasy.

-¤-

It wasn't until the next morning when he was returning from the morning run with the dogs that he realized why JR's words had pushed at some memory inside him. He barely saw the movement at first, a slender form darting from tree to tree in the garden he was passing before it ran up and climbed the fence, jumping down on the sidewalk a few meters in front of him, golden soft hair catching the sunlight and Jared recognized the boy scout that had come knocking on his door weeks earlier, stunning green eyes and soft pink lips. The kid was half way turned towards him, clearly not aware of his presence, when a woman's voice called out from the other side of the fence.

"Jensen Ross, you come back here this instant or we will be late for your scout meeting!"

"Jensen," Jared gasped and the boy spun around.

The second he saw the boy he _knew_ and he stared at he boy as full lips parted on a gasp. Jared could see the word 'Jay' form but no sound came out.

"Jensen Ross," Jared said, still staring at the kid. "JR..."

The boy nodded and then he smiled, small white teeth against pink lips and for a second Jared saw a flicker of tongue

"I wanted it to be you," Jensen said in that perfect, soft voice. "I imagined it was you..."

-¤-


	2. The Boy Scout

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's one thing to have dirty thoughts about a boy you talk over the phone, another thing to have said boy standing in front of you, in his boy scout uniform.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 12, Jared 23)

-¤-

"Jensen. Ross. Ackles. I expect you in the car within two minutes."

Jensen turned away from Jared at the sound of his mother's voice, knowing full well that his mom might actually decide to _not_ drive him to the scout meeting if he didn't obey. When he turned back he saw Jared - Jay - staring at him, lips still parted in surprise and Jensen felt heat rise on his cheeks. 

"I'm..." he started but he didn't know how to go on.

For all the times he had wished that Jay would indeed be Jared, the neighbor he hadn't been able to stop thinking about, it was a very different thing to actually stand in front of the man again, knowing that Jared must be able to remember how Jensen had sounded on the phone the night before. 

"Jesus fucking..." Jared mumbled and his eyes travelled Jensen's body. 

"I need to go," Jensen said softly and took a small step forward. "My mom...scout meeting..."

Jared nodded and looked away from Jensen, instead looking down to where the two huge dogs had flopped down on the summer warm sidewalk.

"Can I call?" Jensen asked, teeth digging down into his lower lip when he looked up at the tall man.

The man didn't answer but his gaze flickered back to Jensen, multi colored eyes moving over Jensen's thin frame before staying on his face.

"Jensen, I swear to god..."

"I..." Jensen mumbled and turned away from Jared, moving towards where his mom was waiting for him, all the while hoping that Jared would say something, beg him to stay but the man remained silent and the only thing Jensen could hear was the low whine from the dogs as he walked away.

"There you are, get into the car, honey," Donna said. "We don't wanna be late after all. I have the papers for the popcorn sale in the binder in the backseat. Jensen darling, I do think you might have a chance at winning this if you continue as well as you have now."

Jensen nodded and slid into the car with one last look back over his shoulder but he couldn't see the older man anywhere and he felt something settle hard and deep in his belly when he got into the car and not even the prospect of winning the popcorn sale would lift his spirits.

-¤-

"...with two more weeks to go there's a fierce competition, I take it you boys really want that bike, eh?"

Around him the room exploded in cheers but Jensen's thought weren't really on the scout meeting and he found himself sitting fingering at the scarf tied neatly around his neck, counting the moments until he could leave and meet his mom. And try to see if Jared was still willing to talk to him.

"We have Jensen Ackles still in the top, with Richard de Klerk as a close second but don't you worry, you'll all have time to try and catch up with them. We have the big hiking trip within a month, we will talk more about that during the next meeting, and remember I need signed permission slips from each one of you that plan to come with us. So I'm guessing that will be each one in attendance."

Another round of applause rang out in the room and Jensen could see the leaders smile at that, he knew that just a week earlier he would have been as excited as all the other boys but his mind refused to leave the way that Jared had stared at him in stunned silence. 

"We will end this meeting for today, please all stand up and say the oath with me."

Jensen rose with the rest of his group, and the familiar words slid off his tongue in harmony with the other scouts.

" _On my honor I will do my best  
To do my duty to God and my country  
and to obey the Scout Law;  
To help other people at all times;  
To keep myself physically strong,  
mentally awake, and morally straight._"

For the first time since Jensen had joined the local scout group his tongue almost tripped over the last word of the oath and he felt tears sting behind his eyelids before he managed to blink them away and stand with his back straight until they were all let go and he found himself happy that the meeting had been shorter than they usually were, Jensen didn't want to focus on hikes and merit badges in that moment.

-¤-

"May I be excused?"

Jensen could feel his parent's gazes on him but he kept his own locked on the plate where he had been pushing one lonely meatball back and forth through the sauce. 

"Yes, Jensen," Donna said and Jensen was sure that his mother had noticed how off he had been all day. "Oh, and Jen, you do remember me and your dad going to your aunts after dinner. We will be home tomorrow after lunch."

"Oh,” was all Jensen managed to get out.

"With Josh at camp and Kenzie sleeping at Lily's, will you be okay by yourself? I know it's the first time you've been home alone over the night and..."

Jensen heard his mom worries, but it sounded like they came from far away and he was barely aware of assuring his parents he would be okay before he fled the dining room, trying to ignore the sudden flutter in his belly when he realized he would be home alone; that would give him the perfect opportunity to call Jared. He fought against the tiny, inner voice that asked if he really thought Jared would still want him now that he knew who Jensen really was. Jensen needed to find out and he barely had patience to wait until his mom had told him goodbye, a soft kiss pressed against his forehead, before he was clutching the phone tight in his hand.

His slender fingers hesitated over the buttons for a while but Jared knew who he was now, and hitting *67 didn't feel like something he needed to do, instead he pushed in Jared's number and stared at his phone for a few long moments before he pushed the call button. He hadn't been aware of holding his breath, not until he breathed out hard enough for it to hurt when tone after tone sounded without anyone answering.

"Please answer, please please _please_ answer," Jensen mumbled and clutched the phone close. 

When the phone remained dead Jensen lay down on his bed and stared at the black display before trying again with the same result. Two hours and five more calls and he had to accept that Jared clearly didn't want to speak to him and Jensen had moved from his bed to the window sill where he could see Jared's house rise above the hedges and trees. Jensen sat curled up, arms around his legs and his eyes locked on Jared's house while dusk turned into night and he came to the realization that there would be no one to notice if he wasn't there.

"I could... I have to..." he mumbled suddenly.

Quickly the boy moved around the room, for a moment he pondered dressing in something besides his soft pajama pants and thin sleeping t-shirt but he knew that if he took too long, he would loose the sudden surge of bravado and instead he slipped out of his room and ran down the stairs, almost stumbling over his own feet before he skidded to a halt in the hallway long enough to slip bare feet into his favorite sneakers. Stepping outside he took a few deep breaths of the crisp night air, letting it soothe him before he knelt and removed the spare key from under one of the rocks lining the porch steps. The sound of the lock clicking seemed impossibly loud and it made Jensen startle before he could get a grip of himself and start walking to Jared's house with as much determination as he could manage.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared breathed a sigh of relief when the phone stopped vibrating on the bedside table, he had turned the ring tone off after the first call but he hadn't had it in him to actually turn the phone off, instead he kept looking at it each time it started vibrating again, watching it move across the glossy wood surface with each vibration. Somewhere above him he could hear his roommates move around the house, clink of bottles and then suddenly the smell of freshly popped popcorn reached through the closed door and down the stairs. 

"You gotta be fucking kidding me," Jared groaned and pressed the heel of his hand down against his growing erection. "Should've thrown those damn popcorn out."

A part of him wanted to walk up the stairs and throw the popcorn away but he knew that would result in a discussion with his friends that he really wasn't ready for, and never would be. Jared tried to close his eyes and ignore the mouth watering smell but the only thing he saw in the darkness was stunning green eyes that looked up at him, filled with hope, and the way the same hope had flickered away when Jared had been unable to answer JR when he asked if he could call again. Only, his name wasn't JR, it was Jensen, the twelve year old son of one of his neighbors. It was all too real for his mind to fully deal with it but Jared knew he couldn't ignore the boy forever either.

"Maybe he'll stop calling," Jared muttered to himself. "He'll forget all about me soon."

It was when those words had fallen from Jared's lips that realization slammed into him; he did _not_ want Jensen to forget about him. No, what he wanted was Jensen gasping his name like he had the night before, he wanted to see those green eyes go dark with lust and...

"Fuck it," Jared said and reached for the phone, looking down at Jensen's number on the missed calls list and he was just about to call when a small sound broke his concentration. 

Jared frowned and looked around the bedroom before he got up and walked into the living area that took up most of the basement, but he could see no reason for the sound, but just then he heard it again and his gaze zeroed in on the rarely used side door that led from the back stairs straight into Jared's basement apartment. Jared walked over to the door, half hidden behind a few big plants and when he pushed it open not much of the inside light reach around him to light up the dark space beyond the door, but he didn't need the light to recognize the small figure standing on the other side of the door. 

"Jensen," Jared gasped and looked down into green eyes that looked up at him through thick eye lashes.

"You...never answered," Jensen said quietly, changing his weight from one foot to the other. "I...I know I'm just a kid, okay? But..."

Jared didn't let the boy get further before he took a step back and motioned for Jensen to come inside. Green eyes went wide but Jensen fell silent and stepped inside and Jared let his gaze drift down the boy's slender frame, taking in the thin t-shirt with its faded Scooby Doo print and soft cotton pajama pants with a pattern Jared was pretty sure was supposed to be small versions of R2D2. The boy toed out of his sneakers at the door before taking a few hesitant steps into the room and looking around. Taking a deep breath Jared closed the door and then he crossed the room and walked up the stairs, locking the door to the rest of the house. 

"Do your...parents know you're here?" Jared asked when he walked back down.

Jensen looked up at him and shook his head quickly.

"They're not home, it's...my first night alone," he answered and bit his lower lips before he took another step towards Jared. "But I couldn't...I needed to talk to you."

A quick glance into his bedroom and Jared's gaze fell on his phone where it lay forgotten on the bed.

"I was just about to call you," Jared admitted and looked at the boy in front of him. 

Dressed in his childish outfit, feet bare and toes curling and uncurling against the thick rug on the floor, Jensen looked like sin personified. Like everything Jared shouldn't want, shouldn't crave. 

"Yeah?" the boy asked and Jared was sure he could see a flicker of hope in green eyes.

"Yeah, I should have answered earlier," Jared said and stepped even closer, forcing Jensen to tilt his head back to keep eye contact. 

Jared could see the boy swallow hard before a pink tongue came out to wet soft, plush lips again and that was it, the last of Jared's resolve crumbled at that small, innocent gesture. He lifted one big hand and cupped Jensen's rounded cheek, thumb stroking over full lips and he heard the boy gasp quietly at the touch.

"Do you want this?" Jared asked. "Do you _really_ want this?"

"Yes," Jensen answered, lips moving against Jared's finger. "I like you," the boy added softly.

Without answering Jared let his hand slide until it curved around the back of Jensen's head, holding the boy still when Jared leaned down to press their lips together. He didn't know what he had expected, but it sure wasn't Jensen arching into the kiss, slender arms coming up to wrap around Jared's neck as the boy had to push up on his tip toes to slide his tongue into the wet heat of Jared's mouth. Wanting to get better access to the boys mouth, Jared put big hands on slender hips and lifted Jensen clean off the floor, smiling into the kiss when a low yelp left Jensen's lips before the boy wrapped his legs around Jared's waist, the boy barely reaching around Jared's narrow hips with his childishly scrawny legs.

"This is wrong," Jared mumbled against the boy's lips but he couldn't stop kissing him, tasting the sweetness of kid's toothpaste with each lick. 

“D-do...you want me?" Jensen whispered and pulled away to look at Jared.

"I shouldn't," Jared said and he watched Jensen's face fall, green eyes blinking away tears. "But I want you, damnit, I want you _so_ much."

The smile was brilliant and Jared wiped away the wetness from Jensen's eye lashes before he leaned in and captured the boys lips again, licking into the small mouth and Jensen's tongue tangled with his, small needy sounds filling the room. Jared had planned to carry the boy to the bedroom, his slender form not much of a weight to carry, but the arousal soared high in his blood and Jared felt his legs go weak. 

"Jay?" Jensen mumbled questioningly when Jared sat down in the middle of the couch.

Shifting Jensen around until the boy was straddling him, slender legs on each side of Jared's muscular thighs, Jared pushed the boy back enough to look into his green eyes.

"The things we talked about yesterday," Jared said in a rough voice. "My hands on you, my fingers inside you, my tongue licking you open...is that what you want?"

A deep blush stained Jensen's cheeks and for a moment he looked down but then the hands still wrapped around Jared's neck moved, small hands tangling in his hair and Jensen leaned in and pressed his lips against Jared's. The almost hesitant touch of the small tongue against his lips had Jared moaning, opening up to the boy, willing to give him whatever he wanted.

"I want," Jensen mumbled quietly. "But I'm...scared..."

"I promise it'll be good for you, I promise to do anything I can for it to not hurt too much," Jared promised and pressed soft kisses over Jensen's freckled nose and rounded cheeks.

"But it will hurt?" Jensen asked and Jared could hear fear in the boy's voice. 

Jared kissed the boy deeply, letting his tongue explore Jensen's mouth until he could feel the boy's body relax against his.

"It will hurt, at the start," Jared admitted. "I've asked you before but...this is different. Jensen, do you trust me?"

The boy stared at him, green eyes wide and hesitant but his hands were still buried in the soft strands of Jared's hair and Jared let his hands slide down to the boy's hips, fingertips sliding up under the soft t-shirt and stroking over sensitive skin. 

"I trust you," Jensen whispered.

Jared smiled and kissed the boy once more before he slowly started to push the t-shirt up and after just a moments hesitation Jensen lifted his arms to let Jared pull the garment off and drop it to the ground before looking down over the boy's body, letting his eyes travel down over narrow chest and and flat belly to the place where the soft sleeping pants were pulled down low from Jensen's position across his lap. A low groan escaped Jared before he leaned forward and closed his lip around one pink little nipple, causing the boy to let out a low whine and arch forward against Jared.

"Tickles," Jensen mumbled. "Feels...good..."

He shifted on Jared's lap and the movement made the boy slide forward, Jared looked up in time to see Jensen's eyes go wide, his pink lips parting on a surprised gasp, when he came in contact with Jared's hard cock through two layers of clothing. Before the boy had time to get scared or nervous, Jared licked his way over to the other nipple and gave it the same treatment until Jensen's hips were grinding down against him and he could feel the boy hard under the soft pajama pants.

"You...naked...now..." Jared growled and lifted Jensen off his lap.

The boy whined at the lost of contact but when Jared pushed at the pants the kid seemed to realize what he wanted, helping Jared to push them down until Jensen could kick them to the floor before climbing back on Jared's lap. Jared's cock twitched when he took in the sight of Jensen on his lap, tiny body tanned and freckled, pale skin where shorts had hidden him from the sun and Jared knew he wanted to lick along the line separating the darker skin from the creamy white, but what really had him harder than ever before was the sight of the boy’s small cock and soft, hairless balls. Jared _knew_ he would spend hours upon hours exploring Jensen's body.

Jared put one hand on the small of Jensen's back, smiling when his hand spread the entire width of the boy's body, before he slid it down to cup the perfect swell of the boy's ass and he saw that adorable blush spread over Jensen's cheeks once more.

"What..." Jensen started but bit down on his lower lip for a moment before going on. "What do you want me to do?"

Jared answered with lifting Jensen up and placing the boys on his knees on the couch, leaning forward against the back, before he got to his knees behind Jensen, face mere inches away from the boy's perfect ass and Jared's breath hitched in his throat when he placed his hands on Jensen's ass, spreading him open. The difference between Jared's big hands and Jensen's small frame looked almost obscene and Jared had to let one hand slide down to pop the button of his jeans, releasing the almost painful pressure on his hard dick.

"I want you to just...take it..." Jared said and looked to where Jensen's small, pink hole was waiting for him. "Trust me to make it feel good."

He leaned forward and let the tip of his tongue slide over rosy pink, puckered skin and it seemed like the touch shot electricity through Jensen's body, the boy gasping and his whole body tensing up. Jensen let his head fall down against the cushion, small whine half drowned out against the fabric. Jared licked over the opening time and time again, each touch pulling the sweetest moans from Jensen's lips and Jared's own cock was hard and leaking pre-come. 

"God," Jensen almost sobbed against the couch.

Jared pulled back for a moment, worried that maybe the boy didn't like it but the second his tongue left Jensen's body, the boy was pleading.

"No, please, don't stop," Jensen whined and pushed his ass back towards Jared. "Don't want you to...please...more.."

Jared let one finger slide down Jensen's ass, stroking over where the pink skin was shining with Jared's saliva. The touch had Jensen whimpering before Jared leaned in again and let his tongue circle the tiny rim, licking over it without adding any pressure until he could feel Jensen relax fully, only the back of the couch and Jared's hands on his as keeping the boy up. Sealing his lips around the rim, Jared sucked at Jensen's perfect little hole, causing a soft mewling sound to spill from the boy's lips, and then he pushed the tip of his tongue against the small opening until he could feel Jensen's body give way, opening up to let him inside. 

"Oh," Jensen gasped his body tensed up at the intrusion.

Jared couldn't hold back a low, rumbling moan when he felt Jensen's inner muscles clamp down hard around the tip of his tongue and he held still, letting the boy adjust before he started pushing in deeper, circling his tongue around the inside of Jensen, tasting every part of him. 

"Mmmm," Jensen moaned and Jared felt the boy shiver around his tongue. "This is...so much better...than my fingers..."

Pulling back slightly Jared let his tongue catch on the inside of the rim, tracing it around slowly until Jensen was pushing back at him again, muscle relaxing so Jared could easily work his tongue in and out of the boy’s body. He didn't hesitate for more than a moment before he slowly pushed one finger inside next to his tongue.

"Your finger is...bigger than mine..." Jensen gasped and once more Jared pulled his tongue away.

"Yeah baby, let me know if it becomes too much," he said and pressed a soothing kiss against the curve of Jensen's ass.

"Not...oh... not too much," Jensen moaned softly, already relaxing again. "Feels...please...more..."

"Soon, baby," Jared promised. "Soon."

Ignoring the boy's soft protest, Jared withdrew his fingers and fumbled for the the bottle of lube he knew would be hidden under the couch, breathing a sigh of relief when his fingers closed around it, because he didn't want to stay gone from Jensen's body a second longer than absolutely necessary.

"Just..try and stay relaxed," Jared said and popped the lid open.

Jensen flinched slightly at the sound but he kept his position and didn't shy away when Jared covered two fingers with lube before returning them to the waiting, pink hole. He knew that the touch must be cold, the lube still not warmed by his body heat, and Jensen hissed slightly at the first touch.

"Shhh," Jared mumbled and stroked soothingly over Jensen's backside. "It's okay, you're so good. Such a good boy for me, Jensen."

The words seemed to relax the boy even further and soon Jensen was pushing back against Jared's slick finger and he dared to push a finger deep inside, the warming lube making the intrusion much easier. He moaned when he felt Jensen's body let him inside. Carefully he pushed a second finger against the small opening and Jensen whined softly before pushing his own legs further apart on the couch and canting his hips back in something that was clearly an invitation.

"Fuck," Jared groaned when two fingers slid into the perfect, silken heat of Jensen's ass.

"Wait," Jensen gasped and Jared could feel the boy's inner muscles lock down hard around him, tight enough to hurt. "It...god it burns..."

Jared held his fingers still but leaned forward to circle his tongue against the rim where it was stretched taut around Jared's two fingers, it seemed like the touch was enough to make Jensen slowly relax until Jared could slide the fingers in and out, carefully stretching the muscle until Jensen was reduced to low moans and whimpers as he rocked himself back on Jared's fingers. Slowing down his movement Jared started scissoring his fingers, working Jensen open while he kept on licking at the boy's ass, relishing in the way Jensen squirmed under his tongue.

"More..."

The word was almost drowned in a moan but once it breached the arousal fogging Jared's mind he pressed in a third finger, staring transfixed as it disappeared into the boy, pink rim wide and shining with both saliva and lube. 

"Think you're ready?" Jared asked and moved to sit beside Jensen, fingers still working the boy's ass open.

Jensen turned to look at Jared, the green in his eyes barely visible around pupils blown wide and Jared couldn’t stop himself from pushing his fingers deep and hard into Jensen, a low cry escaping the boy's lips before Jared could pull him closer to lick the sounds from Jensen's lips. 

"Yeah, yeah," Jensen moaned softly. "Want to...just...please..."

"I'll be careful," Jared promised once more before pulling his fingers out of the boy's ass, smiling at the low, whimpering sound that Jensen couldn't hold back when he was left worked open. 

He tugged his t-shirt over his head, knowing full well that Jensen was watching him but it wasn't until Jared moved to push his jeans and boxers off that a low sound left Jensen, it was something between a gasp and whimper and when Jared looked over at the boy he saw wide, green eyes locked on his cock.

"It's... " Jensen started before he swallowed thickly. "That won’t fit in me."

Jared looked down his body to where his cock was curving up against his belly, hard and leaking pre-come, Jared knew he'd never been that hard before, never so turned on as he was with Jensen. 

"It will," he assured the boy. "I promise to go slow."

Sitting down on the couch he spread his legs slightly before reaching for the lube, groaning when the first cold drops hit his heated skin and his eyes fluttered shut for a moment when he started stroking the lube down his length.

"Let...me..." Jensen whispered. "Can I?"

Pure willpower held Jared's orgasm at bay but after a few deep breaths he nodded and handed the lube over to the slender boy kneeling next to him on the couch, he had to dig his nails deep into the fabric of the cushions when Jensen's small hands started working lube down his length until Jared thought he might go insane with the pure pleasure of Jensen's hesitant touch. 

"Wow," Jensen mumbled, gaze transfixed to where he was stroking Jared, preparing him. "Are you...is this... Am I okay?"

"Fuck Jen," Jared moaned. "You're more than okay, you're amazing."

The boy smiled a hesitant, almost shy smile at Jared before he withdrew his hand and looked down on his lube covered hand, freckled nose wrinkling at the sticky feeling on his skin. Jared looked down to where his own fingers were still sticky with lube from having fucked them deep into Jensen's body and he smiled invitingly when he raised sticky digits to Jensen's lips. 

"What?" Jensen gasped and Jared took the opportunity to slide one finger in between soft lips.

A part of him had expected the boy to protest, to pull away, maybe even to gag, but no part of him had expected the moan that made Jensen's mouth vibrate around his finger or the soft tongue that licked between fingers to chase to taste of himself on Jared's skin.

"Damn you're so fucking amazing," Jared groaned and put big hands on Jensen's hips. "Ready?"

Jensen looked scared, and Jared couldn't really blame the boy, but he knew what he wanted, what the both of them wanted and Jensen didn't put up a fight when he lifted the boy until his body was held above Jared's lap, hard cock nestled into the cleft of the boy's ass. 

"I'm...yeah," Jensen mumbled and tried to shift a little but Jared held him still. "Ready...please..."

Slender kid arms came up to wrap around Jared's neck, fingers tangling into his hair and slowly Jared started lowering the boy, until the head of Jared's cock was pressing against the impossibly small opening. 

"It will hurt...a little..." Jared said, holding the boy still, giving him a chance to change his mind.

"It's okay..." Jensen said and blushed deeply. "I...trust you..."

Jared groaned at the words, how genuine they sounded falling from Jensen's small lips and carefully he pressed the boy down, feeling Jensen's body opening to let him inside. A high pitched whine left the boy and the unfamiliar burn and stretch brought tears to soft green eyes.

"No, don't cry," Jared said softly and held Jensen still, letting him adjust to the initial stretch and burn.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Jensen whimpered. "I'm not sure I can...it's so _big_!"

"I know baby, I know," Jared said and pressed soft kisses against Jensen's neck. "But I know you can, you're such a good boy." 

Jared was almost ready to pull out, to abandoned the thought of fucking the small boy in his arms, when Jensen's eyes went wide and a low keening sound filled the room.

"Jen?" Jared asked but the answer came quickly when Jensen circled his hips, trying to push down even though Jared held him still.

"Please, please," Jensen groaned. "Want more, need more, I want..."

The words were drowned out when Jared took a firm grip of Jensen's hips and pushed him down slowly, inch after inch buried in the tight heat until Jensen was sitting fully on his lap, low whimpers falling from his lips as he gasped for air and tried to relax. The boy's hands had fallen from Jared's hair and instead short nails dug half moons into Jared's shoulders where Jensen gripped him hard. 

"I could," the boy mumbled, shaky smile on his lips. "You...fit..."

"Mmmm," Jared moaned and forced himself to stay still, let Jensen get used to the stretch. "Fit perfectly inside you baby."

Speaking the words Jared could see Jensen's smile go wider and the boy's hands slowly loosened their tight grip on Jared's shoulders when the boy shifted slightly, a high pitched keening leaving his lips when Jared felt his cock brush against the small boy's prostate.

"Sshh," Jared mumbled and leaned in to press a kiss to Jensen's lips. "Don't want my roommates to come and find you like this, do you?"

Jensen's eyes went wide but then his head lolled backwards and he did a full body shiver. Jared felt the boy try to move, clearly wanting to push himself further down on Jared's cock despite Jared's firm grip on the boy's slender hips.

"Damn," Jared gasped. "You _like_ that idea?"

A deep blush spread on Jensen's cheeks but he nodded and that small motion was enough for Jared to let go of the boy's hips, instead sliding one big hand back to cup his ass while he lifted the other to let strong fingers play over Jensen's small, tender nipples.

"C'mon baby," Jared urged on. "Show me how much it turns you on, the thought of someone seeing you like this, licked open and impaled on my cock."

Jensen answered with pushing himself up slightly, too small to pull himself fully off Jared's cock in the position they were in but it didn't matter to either of them, not when Jensen let his weight slide him back down on Jared's cock, moaning prettily at the stretch. It was clear from each movement that Jensen didn't know what he was doing, nothing seductive, planned, about his movement but with just a few more pushes up and down Jared could see a blissed out expression on the boy's face and that was hotter than anything he had seen before.

"Oh fuck;" Jensen whimpered when he slid down hard, sound of skin on skin when he landed on Jared's lap.

"See," Jared said and licked a stripe down Jensen's sweaty neck. "Told you it would feel good, me inside you, stretching you wide open."

"So good," Jensen agreed shakily. 

Jared shifted slightly and the movement had his cock pushing up against that sensitive spot deep inside Jensen. The boy let out a sharp cry, soft muscles rippling around his cock.

"Need you quiet baby," Jared said and lifted Jensen clear off his cock.

"No," Jensen complained. "Want more, need you in me...please... Jared, don't stop..."

With ease Jared managed to turn the boy around until Jensen's back was pressed against Jared's chest, frail body squirming in his grip.

"I have no plans to stop," Jared growled.

He shifted Jensen until his cock was once more resting against the wet, stretched hole and then he pushed the boy down hard, bottoming out in one slick glide that had another cry leaving the boy's lips and he trembled in Jared's arms. 

"Jen, you need to be quiet," Jared said and lifted one hand to cover Jensen's mouth.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen's breath stuttered against the big hand holding the noises back but he couldn't be silenced, not when Jared held one arm firm around his waist and thrust up into him with slow, deep movements that made Jensen's mind foggy with the intense pleasure crackling under his skin. 

It was more than anything he had expected, each drag of Jared's cock inside him tugging at his inner walls, pushing the pleasure higher and higher until Jensen was glad for the hand over his mouth because there was no way he would have been able to keep quiet without it.

"So fucking good," he heard Jared groan into his ear and he tipped his head backwards, resting it in the crook of Jared's neck and shoulder. "You don't even know...how fucking amazing you are. So tight and hot around me, sweet, sweet boy."

Each word got under Jensen's skin, reducing him to low whimpers and moans that were drowned in the warm skin of Jared's hand, for all the times he had thought of Jared since his first time in the man's house, he hadn't known what to expect, had never expected it to be so overwhelming. Heat burned in his veins and he could feel his orgasm building, climbing higher and higher towards something he'd never felt before. He tried to say something, warn Jared, but the words were muffled and then his whole body tensed, back arching against Jared as he felt his ass clench hard around the cock moving inside of him. 

He could hear Jared groan and he pushed Jensen down hard, the cock as deep as possible in Jensen's body. The boy felt his inner muscles flexing around the hard length when milky white come splattered up against his belly.

"Coming untouched," Jared groaned. "Fucking hell...you're so perfect, like you were made for me..."

Jensen felt his whole body go soft and pliant in Jared's grasp when his orgasm ebbed out, the big man seemed to take advantage of it and fucked up into him with a few hard thrust before he came, warm wetness slicking Jensen's inside. The glide of Jared's cock inside him was even easier, friction lessening but still dragging out his orgasm for a few, intense moments longer. 

The big hand fell from Jensen's mouth and instead Jared wrapped both arms around Jensen's body, holding him close and Jensen relished in the press of Jared's body against his, the heat and comfort of it while Jensen's body slowly came back down from his orgasm. Jensen tilted his head to the side, dragging his lips against Jared's jaw while his breathing slowly relaxed and they both sat still on the couch, Jared's softening cock still deep inside Jensen. 

"I'm sorry," Jared said softly, shifting to press a kiss against Jensen's lips.

"For...what?" Jensen asked worriedly.

He didn't want to sound worried, but despite the pleasure that still made his body tingle he couldn't stop the thoughts that whirled around inside of him, parts of him expecting Jared to lift him off and dismiss him now that the man had gotten what he wanted. 

"For not answering your calls," Jared whispered into Jensen's ear. "I freaked out, but that didn't mean... it doesn't that I don't want you. I want you more than I should."

Jensen shivered when Jared's breath brushed against the tender skin of his ear, soft touch of lips against his still heated skin. Big hands closed around Jensen's hips, lifting him up until Jared's cock left his body and Jensen gasped out a low, surprised hiss when his body was left open to the air. Jared laid him down, his back against the rough fabric of the couch, multi-colored eyes drifting down his body and Jensen tried to close his thighs but Jared slid big hands up the inside of his legs and pushed them further apart, looking down to where Jensen was spread open. 

Jensen felt the blush spread, knowing full well it covered his cheeks, neck and was crawling down his chest, he focused on the feel of Jared's hand, spread wide on the inside of his thighs, sending sparks of arousal through his body.

"You look so pretty like this," Jared said and slid down to his knees beside the couch. "Tiny little hole fucked open from my cock, leaking my come..."

A shiver ran through Jensen's body at that because he could _feel_ it, the slick heat of Jared's come inside him, slowly leaking out of him until Jared pushed a finger at the opening, gathering the come and pushing it back inside Jensen's body.

"Are you sore, baby?" Jared asked and twisted two fingers into Jensen's body.

Moaning quietly Jensen pushed himself down on Jared's fingers, because while there was soreness around his hole, he couldn't stop his body from reacting to Jared's touch and he felt his cock growing hard again. 

"Oh the stamina of youth," Jared chuckled.

Jensen wanted to answer but before he could get another word out, Jared leaned forward and licked a slow stripe over Jensen's hole, tongue dipping inside to gather up come. 

"Think you can come again, just from this?" Jared asked and licked around the rim. "Just from my tongue working you open again, licking my come back out?"

The tongue pushed deep inside Jensen, curling like Jared wanted to lick every trace of himself from Jensen's body and Jensen let his legs fall further apart, canting his lips up to give the man better access. 

"Yes, yes," Jensen whined. "Jared... Jared...please..."

He could feel Jared place his thumbs on either side of his opening, spreading him further open and Jensen moaned when Jared sealed his lips around the rim and sucked the come out of Jensen's body, tongue tracing the inner walls until Jensen couldn't hold it back anymore. His whole body arched up off the couch when his second orgasm ripped through him. Jensen felt his body tremble with the force of it until he was so sensitive he tried to squirm away from Jared's warm tongue inside him. 

"Jay..." he whimpered. "Can't...take more..."

Jared stood up then, hands moving away from Jensen's sensitive body for a moment before he leaned back down and lifted Jensen up into his arms and Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck. He knew his eyes were wide, curious, when the man carried him to the bedroom, softly laying him down on sheets that smelled of Jared and Jensen reached out and pushed the forgotten phone away before shuffling to the side.

"When will your parents be home?" Jared asked, standing beside the bed. 

"Tomorrow," Jensen said, blushing as he laid spread out on the bed with Jared watching him. "Some time after lunch I think."

"Then you can stay here," Jared murmured and laid down beside Jensen.

Jensen nodded quickly, pushing himself closer to Jared until he was almost draped across the man's chest and one of Jared's big hands rested on his hip, finger's spreading wide over the curve of his ass.

"I want to stay," Jensen admitted because there was no place he would rather be.

"Good," Jared said. "I still have things to show you, baby."

Jared kissed him softly and Jensen moaned against the man's lips, trembling under the touch of Jared's fingers against his skin.

"You know what I want?" Jared asked after a few minutes silence.

"No."

"I want to have you in your boyscout uniform, on your knees before me, with those wonderful lips stretched wide around my cock," Jared said in a voice that was thick with lust.

Jensen shifted to look at Jared, and he lifted a small hand to push through Jared's hair before he nodded.

"Yeah," Jensen said and licked his lips. "Yeah, I'd like that."

-¤-


	3. The Green Badge of Envy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Misunderstandings and insecurities threaten to tear apart whatever there is between Jared and Jensen, forcing the two of them to realize what is important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 12, Jared 23)

-¤-

Jared could hear his house mates out in the garden, probably doing everything they could come up with instead of doing the homework that was piling up on the living room table. Jared was itching to join them, relax for a few hours but he doubted hanging out with his friends would be very relaxing if the previous two weeks were anything to go by.

"Jay," Chad called out, poking his head through the open door to the garden. "Are you gonna stay in here and mope over whatever guy you've been moping over?"

Without a word Jared lifted his hand and gave Chad the finger.

"Oh fuck you too," Chad said but he ruffled Jared's hair affectionately on his way to the kitchen and put down a beer next to Jared on his way back out.

"Thanks," Jared said and closed his fingers around the neck of the bottle. "Are you guys gonna hang around tonight?"

"Nah, it's the weekend, Jay," Chad said. "We're heading over to Riley's in an hour or so. You're welcome to tag along of course."

"We'll see," Jared said but he was pretty sure they both knew it was a no.

When his friend went back outside Jared leaned back on the couch, not even trying to read the book open on his lap, instead he let himself drift off into daydreaming until he was knocked from his reverie by the doorbell. Opening his eyes he looked towards the open door but it didn't seem like the other guys cared about the doorbell even when it rang a second time. 

"Lazy bastards," Jared grumbled and got up and he was halfway to the door before he realized his was half hard in his suddenly rather tight jeans. "Oh fuck it."

Jared tried to will his erection away but when the door bell rang for a third time he realized that there was nothing to do but try and hide behind the door when he opened it.

"Hi."

The word was spoken in a childish soft tone and it did nothing to lessen Jared's erection, instead he found himself rock hard in an instant when his gaze fell to the small figure on the other side of the door.

"Jensen," Jared said and he could feel his own lips stretch into a smile at the sight.

Jensen smiled back, big eyes looking up at Jared through the fringe of long eyelashes and a slight blush staining his cheeks.

"I hope... I mean... Do you mind me coming here? I can go again, I just thought that..." Jensen said quickly, words tumbling over his tongue. "I should leave..."

"Of course you shouldn't," Jared said and reached out to grab Jensen's wrist, his own fingers still cold from holding the beer that now sat forgotten on the table.

"I tried to knock on your private door," Jensen said and let Jared pull him inside. "But no one answered and I thought... I knew you were home..."

"So are the others," Jared said and he saw Jensen's gaze dart towards the back of the house. "So you better be quiet."

Jared pulled Jensen with him until they reached the door that led down to the basement and he practically pushed the boy inside before he locked the door behind them. The second the lock clicked shut he lifted Jensen clean off the floor and pressed his lips against Jensen's, feeling the boy opening up willingly and wrapping his legs around Jared's waist with a little whimpery sound.

"I didn't know if you'd be happy to see me," Jensen whispered when Jared pulled back for a moment.

"Always happy to see you," Jared smiled and carried Jensen down the stairs before making the boy untangle and putting him down.

Jared hadn't seen Jensen for over a week, the boy's school and scout duties clashing with Jared's school and work and Jared hadn't realized how much he had missed the boy until he had him back, soft lips against his and slender arms wrapped around Jared's neck. Taking a calming breath of air, Jared took a step back from the boy, for the first time taking in his appearance.

"Did you came straight from a meeting?" Jared asked when his gaze slid over Jensen's little khaki shirt and green shorts.

"Yeah," Jensen said and looked down his own body. "Mom and Dad were busy and I said I would go over to Chris's place to work on a scout project."

"Smart boy," Jared smiled and lifted his hands to touch the red scarf tied around the boy's neck. "Does that mean I have you for a few hours now?"

"Your... friends..." Jensen said and his gaze drifted up towards the ceiling. "What if they come down?"

"The door is locked. As long as you can keep somewhat quiet we shouldn't have a problem," Jared said with a small smirk. "So no screaming out in pleasure."

Jensen's cheeks flamed red enough to match the scarf and Jared slipped two fingers inside the scarf, feeling the silky skin of the boy's neck and the point where his pulse was fluttering under the skin. 

"Remember what I said during our first time together?" Jared asked and pulled on the scarf until he forced Jensen up on his tip toes, their bodies pressed close together.

"Yeah," Jensen whispered. "That's why I... came dressed like this. I wanted to..."

Jared felt his mouth go dry when the boy slid down on his knees with a graceful movement, bare knees placed firmly on the rug in front of the couch. Jensen's hands rose to push his shirt up to get to his buckle, fumbling with it before he got it open. 

"Jesus fuck," Jared groaned.

Jensen's gaze snapped up and a small frown appeared on his face, lips pouting out and Jared knew the boy was seconds away from complaining about the cursing but Jared silenced him by sliding one finger in between full lips, feeling the velvety smoothness of Jensen's tongue against the pad of his finger. Smiling down at the boy Jared let his thumb stroke up over Jensen's cheek, still childishly rounded, and the boy's eyes fluttered shut for a moment before nimble fingers continued their work to get inside Jared's pants.

"You're gorgeous like this," Jared said softly when Jensen tugged the belt open and let his searching fingers dip inside the waistline of Jared's jeans. "Wish I could take a picture, jerk off thinking of you on your knees for me."

The deep blush seemed to a be a permanent fixture on Jensen's face, enhancing each one of his freckles and it raised Jared's feeling of 'wrong' and 'dirty' as quickly as his feeling of 'oh my god, yes' that curled up his spine when Jensen finally managed to get his jeans and boxers down, putting his small hand on Jared's rock hard dick.

"Fuck," Jared gasped and he could hear Jensen try to protest around his fingers but he didn't give the boy any chance to actually speak up. 

His big hand cradled the back of the boy's head and he pushed Jensen closer to his crotch, not pulling his fingers out of the boy’s mouth until the very last second and he quickly replaced them with the head of his cock, dragging it over the boy's lips until they were glistening with pre-come.

"You just get prettier and prettier," Jared said with a smile that grew wider when Jensen licked his lips clean. "Do you want this?"

The question was punctuated by Jared pushing his cock against Jensen's lips and Jensen let his lips part. Jared could see the small mouth stretch wide around him for a second before he pulled back.

"Want," Jensen said quickly. "I can take it."

He grabbed Jared's dick with both hands, pulling him back in at the same time as he leaned forward and licked over the head, tiny tongue darting into the slit and Jared's hips snapped forward before he could stop himself, cock sliding over Jensen's cheek and painting a wet stripe over freckled skin.

"You sure you can take it?" Jared asked with a smirk and let his cock return to the boy's mouth.

"I can, I'll be good," Jensen promised quickly.

Jared could feel his own cock twitch in anticipation at the words that would have sounded so innocent had they not been a part of Jensen's plea for Jared's cock in his mouth. 

"Relax," Jared said and let his fingers tangle in Jensen's hair. "Just let me..."

He didn't finish what he had been about to say because words seemed redundant when he could push his cock against sinfully plush lips and see them part to let him in. He could feel Jensen's tongue swirl the head once before the boy shifted slightly to try and get into a more comfortable position. Jared could feel the slight drag of teeth and he stopped, pulling back out and smiling at the small, disappointed sound from the boy down on his knees in front of him.

"Watch the teeth," Jared reprimanded but he stroked the back of Jensen's head to try and keep the sting of the words down. "Stretch out your tongue."

Jensen seemed a bit confused but he obeyed Jared, sticking his small tongue out and moaning softly when Jared placed his cock against the boy's tongue, slowly pushing back in. Proving that he was a smart kid and a quick learner, Jensen sealed his lips around Jared's cock, making sure his tongue and upper lip prevented the sharp drag of teeth and the second slide into the boy’s wet mouth was good enough for Jared to close his eyes and just revel in it for a moment.

"Try and breathe through your nose," he gritted out through clenched teeth, forcing his own breathing to stay calm despite the hot mouth around him.

Every part of Jared wanted to snap his hips forward, fuck deep and hard into the boy's mouth but he knew Jensen wasn't quite ready for that yet and instead all he could do was stay still, head of his cock inside Jensen's mouth and the boy's small tongue fluttering against the vein on the underside of his cock. 

"Good boy," Jared mumbled when he could feel some of the tension leave Jensen. "Such a good boy."

Green eyes looked up at him, shining with happiness at the praise and Jared couldn't help himself, he had to get deeper into the perfect suction that was Jensen's mouth. He pushed forward slowly sliding another inch into the boy's mouth and he was a bit stunned that the kid could take so much of him in. 

"I swear, you're a natural," Jared mumbled and adjusted the boy's angle slightly, allowing himself to slide even deeper into Jensen's mouth. 

"Do you like it?" Jared asked around a wicked smile, tilting the boy's head until he knew the boy's throat was open and ready for the taking.

Unable to speak Jensen nodded and the slight movement did some really interesting things to Jared's cock, with a mumbled 'relax' he pushed forward another bit, seeing Jensen's eyes go wide when his cock hit the back of the boy's mouth. The small body shook when the boy gagged on the cock and Jared dragged back out, allowing Jensen a desperate gasp for air and small shivers ran through the boy's body.

"Amazing," Jared said and dragged his now saliva covered cock over the boy's lips. "Better than anything else."

It wasn't empty words, Jared had never felt anything like Jensen before, the small boy so eager to open his mouth for Jared, lips stretching impossibly around the hard length and Jensen could see pride in Jensen's eyes when the boy scooted forward, taking more of his cock with a slow moan.

"Quick learner," Jared gasped when the boy took him deep into his mouth. "Like... oh god... like feeling my cock push down into your throat?" 

A whimper sent vibrations through Jared's cock and he stared in awe at the perfect image in front of him: Jensen in his pristine little scout uniform with his shiny, swollen lips stretched wide around Jared and his green eyes looking up at Jared with adoration shining clearly. 

"One day you'll be able to take it all," Jared promised and rocked his hips carefully back and forth, hearing the almost broken little sounds that escaped Jensen despite the hard cock stuffed deep into his mouth. "I will love it, shooting my come straight down your throat, feeling it flutter around me."

Jensen's hands were still around Jared's cock, sliding up and down over the spit slicked skin where his mouth couldn't reach and Jared could feel his orgasm building deep inside him, heat rising and when Jensen let one small hand slide down to stroke over Jared's balls he couldn't stop the explosion of pleasure. The first spurt landed deep in Jensen's mouth and the boy gagged around Jared's cock, his green eyes glistening with unshed tears that gave the boy a vulnerable look that made Jared's orgasm even stronger.

"Oh yes, fuck, so perfect," he moaned and pulled out of the boy's mouth.

A disappointed little whimper left Jensen despite the boy desperately gasping for air but he didn't have time to say or do anything before Jared painted his pretty face with come. The boy's eyes fluttered shut when thick come weighed down his eyelashes and made the pinkness of the boy’s lips turn from inviting to full on obscene. Jared could feel his cock twitch out the last of his release on Jensen's face, stripes of white landing on the flush skin of Jensen's cheeks.

"Well..." Jared gasped, trying to catch his breath. "Aren't you a pretty sight?"

He let his fingers drift up and swipe the come from Jensen's eyes and the boy responded by opening his eyes and look up at Jared. Holding his gaze before he let his tongue flick out and lick the white from his lips with a slow drag of pink tongue that made Jared's cock give an interested twitch besides the mind blowing orgasm he had just marked his boy with. 

"Did..." Jensen started and then he cleared his throat. "Was it good?"

The boy let go of Jared's cock when Jared reached down to lift him clear off the ground once more, wrapping him in a big hug and he kissed him, tasting himself on the small tongue before he smiled.

"You were amazing."

"I can do better," Jensen said and played with his little red scarf.

Jared couldn't hold back the groan when he saw the specks of come on the boy's scarf and for just a moment he couldn't help but wonder how the boy would explain come stains on his boyscout uniform. Then he pushed that thought to the side and carried Jensen to his waiting bed.

"Think you can keep quiet when I fuck you?" he asked the boy, dropping him down on the bed. 

"Yeah," Jensen said quickly and started pulling off his uniform. "I'll be good."

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen didn't really listen to the boy standing beside him at the small table, he liked Nick but all the boy could talk about was badges and the popcorn sale competition that Jensen had been declared the winner of the day before. All Jensen could think of was that he had forgotten to tell Jared about the win and he wondered if the man would be proud of Jensen, if he would care at all.

"How did you do it?" Nick asked and poked Jensen in the side with a bony elbow. "You've never been this good at selling the nasty popcorn."

"It's not nasty," Jensen protested, hoping in vain that his friend would drop the subject because he really thought that 'a guy bought loads to get in my pants' wasn’t a good answer even though Jensen thought it might be the right answer.

"Whatever," Nick grumbled. "I think Richard should have won."

Jensen gritted his teeth together, he really didn't like the idea of another two hours spent at the small stand with a boy who couldn't forgive Jensen for costing his best friend a bike. He didn't answer the boy and soon enough Nick was off on another discussion about upcoming scouting events and Jensen listened while he looked out over the people milling around the mall. He thought that he would gladly let Richard have the stupid bike if Jensen could get out of manning the nut stand in the mall. Shifting slightly he winced when he felt the dull ache in his ass but he couldn't help the small smile that flickered across his lips when he remembered the feel of Jared pinning him against the wall and pushing into him deep and hard.

"What are you smiling at?" Nick asked with another push of elbow.

A familiar heat rose on Jensen's cheek when the question made him blush and fidget slightly because he had no idea how to respond to it and it was only the arrival of a costumer that saved him from coming up with some lie and by the time the man left with Double Dipped Chocolate Peanuts as well as Salted Almonds the boy seemed to have forgotten what they had been talking about. Instead he was reading the comic book he had hidden inside a scout brochure and Jensen found himself having to smile at a small, older woman that came up to the table.

"Well aren't you a pretty sight?" she said with a smile and Jensen felt like all the air had been punched out of his lungs.

Luckily the woman didn't notice his reaction, instead she was leaning forward to read labels on the cans filling the table and fingering over the pamphlets and brochures filling what space was left and it gave Jensen a few seconds to get his control back together. The woman choose a few cans of nuts but Jensen's mind was too messed up to really register it.

"You boyscouts always have the best things," the woman said.

Jensen wasn't really surprised when she reached across the table and pinched his cheek, like she was his grandmother and he was five, instead of twelve. There was certain pats of being a scout that he wasn't quite as fond of as the actual scouting part.

"They never do that to me," Nick pointed out gleefully when the woman had left. "It's because you're such a baby."

Jensen had a retort on his tongue, just about to snap at the other boy when he saw something across the the wide expanse of the mall, something that made everything else fade away.

Jared was leaning against the wall separating two small shops, shoulders back and hips canted forward, putting his whole lean body on display and Jensen felt his mouth go dry at the sight. A small smile was working its way up on Jensen's face before it fell away just as quickly when he realized that the fond smile on Jared's lips wasn't aimed for Jensen but towards a young woman standing next to Jared. Her back was towards Jensen and all he could see was a small, slender form and long honey colored hair, but he knew right away that he disliked her.

Jensen starred in silent despair as Jared pushed off the wall and moved to stand beside the girl, leaning down to whisper something into her ear and when she turned to face him Jensen could see a pretty face and a fond smile curving pink lips. 

"Why are you ignoring me, Jensen?" Nick asked beside him but Jensen wasn't really listening to a word the other boy was saying because all he could hear was the rush of blood in his own ears when Jared reached out a hand to brush strands of hair from the girl’s face. 

"You man the table," Jensen found himself saying suddenly and he snatched the hidden comic book from Nick's grasp.

He could see the brown haired boy about to protest but then a mom and her two kids approached and Nick had no choice but to put on his best boyscout smile and help them out. But he did take his time to glare at Jensen who quickly hid behind the comic. He held it at perfect level to steal glances to where Jared and the girl were standing close together, looking at the display window. The display window of a jewelry store Jensen realized and his already bad day took a turn for the worse. Jensen suddenly felt the age gap between the two of them in a way he had never felt before. 

It took a lot of willpower but Jensen managed to tear his gaze off Jared for a while, forcing himself to focus on the comic in front of him and the next time he looked up Jared and the girl was nowhere in sight. Jensen tried to silence the voice in the back of his mind that wondered if the two might have been holding hands when they left. 

The next thirty or so minutes dragged on, Jensen tried to ignore Nick as much as possible until all the other boy did was shoot Jensen dark glares in between costumers and Jensen had no doubt he would tell Richard what a weirdo that Jensen guy was. Not that it mattered to Jensen, he only cared what one person thought about him.

"C'mon," a female voice said somewhere close. "Look, they're selling nuts, I wanna see if they got Peanut Butter Puffs."

Jensen was about to look up to see who the person was who clearly had awesome taste in nuts but just then an all too familiar voice answered.

"Kristen, don't you already have several cans of nuts at home? You can't need more."

Jensen froze in spot, caught like a deer in headlights and he was too scared to look up and see if Jared had noticed him hiding behind the brochure. If he didn't look up he wouldn't have to see Jared ignore him in front of his girlfriend. 

"Jay, please?" the girl said in a sweet voice. "I'll even buy you some of the honey cashew thingies you like."

Jensen dimly heard Nick talk to the girl, putting several cans in a carrying bag and he could hear in the boy’s voice that he had turned on his charm in full effect, every inch the perfect boyscout.

"Hello Jensen."

The plan to not look at Jared failed when his head snapped up almost painfully fast and he found himself starring up into hazel eyes because Jared was leaning slightly across the table, an amused smile on his lips and Jensen realized that the man must have noticed the hidden comic book.

"Hello... Mr. Padalecki," Jensen forced out, wondering if his voice sounded as weak as he felt. 

"You two know each other?" Kristen asked and handed a few bills to Nick.

Jared's eyes went wide in alarm for just a second before he turned to the girl with a brilliant smile and took the heavy bag from her arms.

"Jensen lives close to me," Jared explained. "He was the one selling me all the popcorn you complained about."

A blush crept up Jensen's cheeks and he didn't really know how to react or what to say when Jared smiled at him, smiled at him while carrying a stupid bag for his stupid girlfriend. 

"Oh, you shouldn't sell him that," Kristen laughed and Jensen took a small, defensive step backwards.

"He shouldn't feed your addiction to nuts either but clearly Jensen is quite a wonderful enabler for the both of us," Jared said with a laugh, nudging against Kristen's slender shoulder and the girl rolled her eyes. 

"I guess he is," Kristen said with a smile. "It was nice meeting you, Jensen. Good luck with the sell, I hope you win some awesome prizes."

"Like the bike wasn't enough," Nick muttered.

Jared must have heard it because his gaze snapped to Jensen in an instant and he raised an eyebrow but he didn't say anything and Jensen knew he couldn't in any way explain why he hadn't told Jared, not when there was other people around. Instead he forced his smile to stay polite and he hoped that no one could hear the sound of his heart breaking when Kristen pulled at Jared's arm.

"Time to go Jay, we need to get this stuff home or we wont be in time for meeting up the others."

For a moment Jensen thought that Jared would protest but instead the man held Jensen's gaze for one second too long before he allowed himself to be dragged away by the blonde beauty by his side. Jensen thought that the words Jared was mouthing were 'call me' but Jensen didn't know what to say in response and he let his gaze drop until the man was gone.

-¤-

Jensen looked at his phone where it was vibrating on the top of his comforter, the ring tone turned off to make sure his parents didn't hear it because they had no idea that Jared had given Jensen the simple, pre-paid phone before... everything. Before Jensen realized that whatever he could give Jared, it wouldn't be enough to not make Jared go looking for more elsewhere. One week of ignoring the phone calls and making sure that he didn't run into Jared out on the street, one week of wondering if Jared had said he was gay only to win Jensen's trust.

The phone stilled and Jensen picked it up, deleting the missed call from the call log and without thinking of the reason why he plugged the phone into the charger hidden behind his bed. The same way he did every evening, making sure it was always fully charged.

Jensen lay down on his bed, eyes closed as he tried to will sleep to come but it kept eluding him and he found himself fidgeting, mind locked on the house down the street where he knew Jared was. He wondered if Kristen was there with him, if Kristen was spread out on Jared's bed the same way Jensen had been, if Jared kissed her the same way he did Jensen. Tears streamed down Jensen's cheek but he didn't even notice until he felt the wetness on his pillow and he swiped angrily at the tears. 

"Jensen," a voice said outside of his door. "I can hear you're still moving around. Go to sleep."  
"Yes, mother," Jensen managed to get out without his voice breaking. 

He cried himself to sleep, ignoring the phone when it once more started vibrating in its hiding place.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared threw the phone down on the couch with a few choice swear words and he squeezed his eyes shut for a few long moments before he pulled in a deep breath of air, trying to calm himself down.

"Answer damnit," he muttered and grabbed the phone again, pushing the call button. 

Ring after ring went through but Jensen didn't answer and Jared didn't know if he really expected the boy to answer anymore, but he didn't know what else he could do. For the first time he really hated the age difference between them, hated that he couldn't just walk over to the boy's house and ask to see him. 

"God fucking damnit," he said and he didn't even think before he threw the phone against the wall, hearing it smash into pieces.

"What the fuck are you doing?" he heard Chad called before opening the door and coming down the stairs.

His friend stopped in his tracks when he saw the broken pieces of the phone on the floor and he raised one eyebrow before he bent and picked it up, pushing a few buttons.

"Good job," Chad said with a little shrug. "Who is this guy that’s got you acting like a mad man anyway?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Jared muttered and sank down on the couch. "It's not what you think it is."

"You've been acting weird ever since you and Kristen had your damn 'girls day out' last week," Chad said and sat down next to Jared. "Did you get your period or something?"

Jared huffed out a laugh and reached out to cuff the back of his friend's head, causing Chad to grin at him for a second.

"Really though, we're more than house mates, Jay," Chad said with a seriousness that surprised Jared. "You're my best friend, and I hope you know you can talk to me about anything."

Jared sighed deeply, he wished that Chad was right but there was stuff you just didn't talk about, not even with your best friend.

"Yeah, sure," Jared said quickly, too quickly if Chad's huff was anything to go by.

"You know I'll never judge," Chad said with a grin. "Or at least not too much. Now what's the deal? Older than you? Married? Bald?"

Jared couldn't help but laugh at his friend and he was pretty sure that was the very reason Chad had said it to begin with.

"Younger," Jared admitted without looking at his friend. "It's... complicated."

"It usually is," Chad said. "Hey, how about I get the others out of the house tomorrow afternoon and you get this mystery guy over and fix things?"

"Not sure it's that easy," Jared said. "I'm not even sure what I've done wrong."

"Get him here, ask him, fuck his brains out and stop being such a moody bitch," Chad said and got up off the couch. "That's an order."

-¤-

Chad's words were echoing in his mind when he was walking over to Jensen's place the next afternoon but apart from 'talk to Jensen' he didn't really have a plan. He knew he had to do something though, because he was missing Jensen like crazy and not only the feeling of the slender boy in his arms, kissing his small mouth but he missed the way Jensen had smiled when Jared had convinced him to stay for a movie and pizza or just the way Jensen had felt in his arms the first night when Jared had fallen asleep holding him tightly. The plan only formed the second he hit the door bell and waited for Jensen's mom to answer, because he was sure that Jensen wouldn't be home from school for another thirty minutes.

"Oh, hello Mr. Padalecki," Donna said with a smile as she opened the door. 

"Hi, Mrs. Ackles," Jared said with his most winning smile. "I was actually looking to talk to your son but I guess it's even better if I talk to you first."

Donna looked surprised and she raised one eyebrow but stepped to the side to let Jared come inside. In the living room Jared couldn't help but look at the wall that showed pictures of Jensen as well as his siblings. Jared had to tear his gaze off the pictures of Jensen in his scout uniform, vivid pictures of Jensen on his knees sprang to mind and Jared really didn't need to get a hard-on in front of Jensen's mother.

"What can I help you with, Mr. Padalecki?" Donna asked when Jared sat down in a plush armchair.

"Please, call me Jared," he started. "I'm not sure that you're aware but I have two dogs?"

"I've seen you running with them, yes," Donna said with a nod. "They seem very friendly."  
"They're stupid mutts," Jared said with a fond laugh. "But yes, they're the friendliest dogs around. The thing is, with school I don't always have time to walk them as much as I’d like to and I was wondering if Jensen might be interested in earning some extra money dogsitting."

"Oh," Donna said and Jared could see her relax. "I think he would like that, he loves dogs but his little sister is allergic so we can't have any pets. As long as it doesn't affect his school or scouting I can't see a problem with it."

Jared relaxed back in the armchair, he felt like he was one step closer to the goal of having Jensen back, now it was only the obstacle of Jensen himself to deal with and Jensen's mother unknowingly helped him with that with her next words.

"Jensen should be home really soon, why don't you just wait here and ask him yourself?"

"I'd love to," Jared smiled. "Thank you, Mrs. Ackles. I appreciate it."

Donna remained in the room with him, asking him questions about his school and his plans for the future while they waited for her youngest son to come home. Jared sure hoped Donna didn't notice the way his gaze drifted over to the pictures of Jensen on the wall. Jared knew it would take all his willpower to not wrap Jensen close in a hug the second the boy stepped through the door. Donna had just gone into the kitchen to fetch a pitcher of lemonade when Jared heard the front door open. 

"Mom, I'm home," Jared heard Jensen say before the boy entered the room. "I'm just gonna..."

Jensen froze in place and his eyes went almost comically large at the sight of Jared sitting there, Jared's fingers were itching to reach out for the boy but just then Donna re-entered the room.

"Welcome home, honey," Donna said. "This is our neighbor, Jared, he has a thing to ask you."

Jensen's lips parted but no words came out and he stared at Jared, shock written clear on his face and it was only Donna filling the glasses of lemonade that saved them from having her asking questions before Jensen managed to get himself together.

"Ask me?" Jensen said in a slightly too high tone.

"Your mom said it was okay," Jared said. "So if you want to, I would love to have you earn some extra cash by dogsitting for my dogs, Harley and Sadie. They're big but they really are really nice and you shouldn't have any problems with them."

Jared already knew Jensen was great with his dogs, the two big furballs had fallen in instant love with the boy and he had seen Jensen play with the dogs several times during their short time together. The boy opened his mouth once more and Jared prepared himself for the no that he was expecting.

"Is... you said yes, mom?" the boy asked, tearing his gaze off Jared.

"Of course honey," Donna said. "I know you want pets, maybe this could be a good in-between? Don't decide now, we don't have dinner for another few hours so why don't you go with Jared to meet the dogs and then you can decide?"

The scene played out far better than if Jared had prepared it himself and he could see the wheels in Jensen's mind turn, trying to come up with some good response but he must have known that there was no way out of it and he made a stiff little nod.

"Sounds awesome," the boy said but his gaze didn't touch Jared again.

"That's good, I'll leave you two alone with your lemonade because I need to start the laundry," Donna smiled. "Mr. Pa... Jared, don't let these great dogs of yours scare my son."

"I wont," Jared said quickly and smiled big and wide, not even having to fake it because Jensen would come home with him, he would finally get to talk to the boy. 

He reached for the glass of lemonade and took a deep swallow of the sour-sweet beverage. He held the smile in place until Donna had left the room and then he was alone with the boy that still hadn't moved an inch since he had seen Jared sitting there. 

"I'm sorry," Jared said quietly and sat the glass down. "I just needed to talk to you."

Jensen didn't answer but he let go of his school bag, went to the table, and took the other glass of lemonade, draining it without looking at Jared for as much as a second.

"I'll... okay. I'll go with you," Jensen said stiffly. "Now please?"

Jared would feel a lot better if not for the fact that Jensen didn't even look at him but he knew better than to start an argument when Jensen's mother could walk back into the room and he finished off his lemonade before leading Jensen back outside and down the street. The sunlight turned the tips of the boy's hair golden and looking down at him Jared was sure that the boy had gotten even more freckles since he had seen him at the mall, small flecks of gold dusted over his face. Neither of them said a word until Jared opened the front door and held it open for Jensen to step inside. 

"Front door?" Jensen asked and his gaze flicked up to Jared for a second. "I guess you don't have to hide your dogsitter."

The bitterness was something Jared had never heard in the boy's voice before and it made a frown appear on his face but Jensen was looking down again as he walked into the living room, looking around for the dogs.

"Where are they?" he asked when no dogs came to greet them. "Do you have them in the basement?"

"They're not here," Jared admitted. "My housemates went out camping and Chad decided they could take the dogs with them."

Jensen turned around then and looked up at Jared, something unreadable in the deep green of his eyes.

"Then why did you bring me here?" the boy asked in a shaky tone. 

Jared walked closer to the boy and he felt a stab of pain when Jensen took a step back from him. 

"You don't answer the phone, you haven't come by, I haven't seen you at all for a week, I had to get you alone somehow," Jared said and sank down on his couch. 

"I didn't see why," Jensen said and looked down. "You don't... need me."

"What?" Jared said, not understanding the pain in the boy's voice.

Jensen turned his back to Jared and walked over to the closed patio doors, looking out into the garden and Jared could see the stiff line of his slender shoulders.

"I'm only..." Jensen started quietly. "I know I'm just a kid but... it hurt, okay? Seeing you with... it hurt."

The last word was a half choked sob and Jared was in motion before he could stop and think about it, hands landing on Jensen's hips when he placed himself behind the boy. He could feel Jensen tense up even more when Jared's touch previously had made the boy melt into his arms.

"Seeing me with who?" Jared asked. "Jensen, there's no one and..."

"At the mall," Jensen interrupted. "You were touching and flirting and you... I saw you. You were looking at the display window of that jewelry store."

Suddenly everything seemed to click into place in Jared's mind and the previous week suddenly made a lot more sense, but the next words out of Jensen's mouth shocked him like nothing else. 

"I know you only want me for... you know... and I... I'm sorry I can't be enough for you," Jensen said so quietly Jared could barely hear it. "But I don't think... it hurts, Jared. And I love the dogs, why are you paying me to be with them? Or... are you paying me to be with you?"

Jared spun Jensen around and fell to his knees in front of the boy, wrapping strong arms around Jensen's waist and ignoring the way the boy tried to struggle free.

"Baby, that was only an excuse to get you to talk to me," he said and pulled Jensen's face down to press a kiss to unresponsive lips. "And let's get one thing settled right away. Jensen, I'm gay. I'm not with Kristen or anyone else. I'm with you."

The struggles faded away and Jensen starred down at Jared with wide eyes. Jared thought he could see budding hope when Jensen lifted his hands to land on Jared's shoulders, a soft and familiar touch that had Jared tightening his grip around the small body in his arms.

"But I'm just a kid," Jensen said quietly. "You can't really be with me. Not the way you could with someone else. I know I'm not good enough."

"Jensen," Jared interrupted and held the boy's gaze. "I'm sorry if I hurt you, Kristen is my best girl but there has never been anything between us. I'm sorry I couldn't say something when we met at the mall, trust me, I really wanted to."

Slowly he could feel Jensen start to relax in his arms but he could tell that the boy didn't really believe him quite yet, that there was hesitation in the touch.

"And Jen," Jared said and stroked a finger over the boy's cheek. "This isn't just about sex for me, I'm sorry if you think that. We can slow things down if you want, just spend time together. I'll prove to you that this means something."

"You... want to just spend time with me?" Jensen asked in surprise. "But I'm just... a kid..."

Jared pulled Jensen close and pressed a chaste kiss to his mouth, nothing more than a soft press of lips but it seemed to break down the last doubt because Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck and clung close to him, mouth opening under Jared's.

"I want to spend a lot of time with you," Jared promised Jensen and pressed soft kisses all over the boy's face. 

"Jay," Jensen whimpered and pressed closer, small hands pushing at the hem of Jared's shirt.

"Jen, this really isn't taking it slow," Jared said and pulled back from the boy.

He was met with deep green eyes and lips that were already swollen from their kissing but it was the brilliant smile on Jensen's lips that had Jared gasping.

"I've missed you," Jensen said and a deep blush crept up his cheeks. "Can... we... I mean. If you want to."

Jared stood up and lifted Jensen up, throwing the boy over his shoulder and ignoring the undignified squeak that escaped Jensen when Jared carried him towards the door down to his apartment.

"Jared, what... oh my god," Jensen complained and tried to wriggle free.

The movement made Jensen's small ass wriggle in a very tempting way where it was pressed close to Jared's face and he gave the rounded curve a soft pat before he took the stairs down with a few quick steps, moving to the bedroom to one more have Jensen spread out on his bed.

His young lover had always been eager and curious, willing to learn and sometimes Jared thought that was one of the things he loved most about the boy. But even so he was surprised when he put Jensen down and the boy pushed Jared towards the bed. 

"Jensen?" Jared asked but went willingly, stretching out on his back on the bed.

"Please," Jensen said. "I wanna feel you. Can I?

"Whatever you want, baby," Jared said.

Jensen pushed Jared's shirt once more and Jared sat up long enough to pull it off, smiling when small hands moved over his chest, tracing over defined muscles. His smile grew when Jensen moved up to straddle his waist, rounded ass pressed against him through the rough fabric of Jensen's jeans and Jared pulled the boy's face down to devour his mouth.

"Whatever I want?" Jensen asked on a breathless moans. "I want to... can I..."

The boy didn't say anything more but he slid back down Jared's body, denim dragging over Jared's crotch until Jensen sat straddled over Jared's thighs and started working the button open, tugging the jeans down. Jared propped himself up on his elbows to see the boy carefully stripping him naked. 

"I'm rather happy we're not taking it slow," Jared said and reached down to drag the pad of his thumb over Jensen's lower lip. "Because damn I've missed you, baby."

Jensen smiled shyly and dragged Jared's jeans off before he crawled up and knelt in the space between Jared's spread legs, pupils blown wide with lust and Jared thought the boy was more beautiful than he had ever been before and the fact that Jensen was still fully dressed made the whole thing even hotter.

"What do you want to..." Jared started to ask but the words drifted off into a moan when Jensen leaned in and circled his tongue around the head of Jared's hard dick.

It was an amazing thing to watch, the red of Jensen's kiss swollen lips and the pink of his tongue where it reached out to gather the pre-come leaking from Jared's cock. One hand wrapped around the base while he balanced himself up with the other one firm against Jared's thigh. 

Jared's gaze was transfixed to where Jensen's lips slowly parted, a tight seal around Jared's cock when Jensen slowly lowered himself down, lips parting impossibly wide around the hard length and Jared fell back on the bed, spreading his legs further.

A low moan escaped Jared's mouth when Jensen pushed off and switched to licking over Jared's cock, warm tongue trailing from the tip and down to the base of his cock. Jensen kept on licking, covering every part of the hardness before he slid even further down and his soft tongue licked down over Jared's sac. Glorious pressure had Jared's hips rising off the bed and his fists clenched the sheet when the boy sucked one of his balls into the warm heat of his mouth.

"You're a quick learner," Jared groaned and reached down to stroke a hand through Jensen's soft hair.

Suddenly the heat disappeared and he could feel Jensen tense up for a few moments before the boy sank down and stretched out on his belly, tongue sliding down and Jared gasped in surprise when it ran over his hole. Just a quick touch but it was enough for Jared's cock to twitch in interest and his legs to fall apart even further, offering more room for Jensen to move.

"Jen," he moaned and his fingers tangled in Jensen's hair, holding the boy back for a moment. "You don't have to do this."

Jensen shook his head slightly, making Jared's hand fall down to the sheets once more.

"I want to," Jensen whispered. "I want to make you feel good, doesn't this feel good? It feels wonderful when you do it to me. But... I can stop..."

The boy sounded so insecure and Jared's hand moved on its own accord, pushing the boy back between his legs until the warm tongue flicked out to press against his hole once more.

It was something he had never even dreamt about, never imagined how it would be, but now that he had Jensen between his legs, pink tongue laving over his hole, Jared knew he wanted it to happen a lot more. Because he had been right and Jensen was a very quick learner. Wet heat pressed against him and Jared could feel his own body part slightly for Jensen's questioning tongue, tip of it tracing the inside of his rim and Jared's whole body was vibrating with the effort it took to stay still.

-¤-  
-¤-

Curiosity had made Jensen do it, it was the only reason he could find to explain it when he slid down and his tongue found puckered skin for the first time. He didn't know what he had expected but the taste on his tongue was dark and heady and he thought he could feel the trace of soap on Jared's skin.

Jared seemed surprised when Jared started to lick at him but Jensen wanted it, wanted Jared to feel the way Jensen had when Jared had first licked him. Warm tongue prodding and sensitive, and he had no plans to stop until Jared pulled him away. But the older man didn't pull him off, instead he parted his legs as wide as possible and soon his hips was moving, pushing against Jensen and Jensen could understand why Jared had always seemed to enjoy his tongue on Jensen's ass. Because the feeling of the man writhing in pleasure at the tip of Jensen's tongue was intoxicating. 

"God," Jared groaned. "Fucking hell you're amazing... such a talented mouth. Fuck."

Not even the curses could tear Jensen away from where his tongue was pushing it's way into Jared's body, he was too busy to try and work his tongue deeper into Jared's body while the older man canted his hips up, allowing Jensen even better space to move.

"Jen... Jen..." Jared almost chanted, hips circling slightly and his hand was back in Jensen's hair, holding him down.

A low moan sounded when Jensen pulled his tongue back out and circled it around the spit slick muscle, feeling it open up like Jared's body was begging Jensen inside once more. Jensen licked over the opening, soft swipes of tongue that had Jared trembling on the bed.

"Jen," Jared groaned when Jensen wriggled his tongue back inside. "I'm gonna come if you keep on doing that and... I really want to come inside you."

Dragging his tongue out slowly Jensen sat up and looked up at Jared, smiling when he realized he could still taste Jared on his tongue and he willingly let the man drag him up until he sat straddled over Jared's belly, the man's hard cock pushing against the small of Jensen's back.

"I liked that," Jensen admitted and he could feel the heat spreading over his cheeks and down his neck. "I think I... can I do that again some time?"

Big hands came up to cradle his face and Jared pulled him down, claiming his mouth in a deep kiss that left Jensen slightly breathless before the man let one hand slide down Jensen's back until it was spread out over the rounded swell of Jensen's ass.

"Whatever you want," Jared said and let his other hand reach for the lube on the bedside table. "How do you want this? It's up to you."

It wasn't even hard for Jensen to choose, not with the way he was straddling Jared, the feel of the man's heated skin underneath him and hard cock behind him. Instead of answering, Jensen lifted his hips slightly, rolling them back against the hardness behind him and he could see Jared's eyes go dark with an almost feral need. The man wasted no time slicking up his fingers and Jensen was barely aware that the low keening sound that filled the room came from him, but he didn't care either. He was fully aware that it was their first time together without the risk of anyone hearing them and he already loved to not have to keep silent. 

Cold slick warmed quickly against the heated skin of his body when Jared slowly pushed one finger inside and the familiar stretch had Jensen arch his back and push down, feeling the finger slide all the way there. Pleasure rippled through him with the slight underlying burn that he barely felt anymore, not for just the fingers, and Jensen begged for more, circling his hips until Jared's finger pressed against the sensitive spot inside of Jensen.

"More, please, I can take it," Jensen pleaded.

"I know you can," Jared praised him and pushed a second finger inside. "Such a good boy."

Jensen felt the stretch, big fingers pushing in deep and spreading lube on his insides, slicking him up in preparation for Jared's cock and Jensen was longing to feel it in him again, longing for the connection of having Jared inside.

"Think you're ready?" Jared asked.

Nodding, Jensen pushed up on his knees until he was balancing over Jared's cock, struggling to keep his balance and not fall down on the slick head that was slowly spreading him open. Gentle fingers slid down his sides, causing him to shiver at the barely there touch and then Jared's hands gripped tightly around his hips and pushed down ever so slightly. Moaning softly Jensen relaxed in Jared's grip and he could feel his body open to let the hard length inside, the burn was stronger but Jensen knew it was worth it, knew it would fade away until his entire world was focused on the slide of Jared inside him. 

When Jared's cock dragged over his prostate Jensen felt his legs give way underneath him and despite Jared's hands guiding him he slid down several inches before Jared's grip on him held him still again Jensen blinked through the tears that came from the intense blend of pain and pleasure.

Slowly Jared lowered Jensen down, pressing himself inside and Jensen was trembling slightly by the time he found himself seated fully on Jared's lap, stretched impossibly wide around the hard cock inside him. He dropped one hand down to his own belly, almost surprised he couldn't feel the outline of Jared's cock where it was filling him up. 

Under him, Jared opened his mouth but just then Jensen clenched down hard and whatever Jared had been about to say was drowned in a loud moan. Jared's hips snapped up, pushing even deeper inside even though Jensen hadn't thought any more was possible. He felt more full than he had ever done before and he didn't care that Jared's hands were holding him tight enough to bruise. It seemed like the both of them were aware of the fact that they were all alone because where Jared usually fought to keep silent he was moaning loud when Jensen pushed up slightly before rocking down.

"God... fuck..." Jared groaned when Jensen balanced his hands on Jared's strong chest and slowly started to ride him.

Jensen heard his own breathless moans being pushed out of him each time Jared bottomed out and he was sure he could feel each vein on Jared's cock when they dragged against his insides, pleasure so perfect it had Jensen's whole body tingling. Jensen rolled his hips back, feeling Jared inside him with each shift of his hips. 

"Jay... please... _please_..."

It wasn't until the words were already out that Jensen realized that he was pleading for something, anything, and Jared's grip on his hips tightened, holding him still while Jared pushed into him hard and deep until each push in had low cries of pleasure spill from Jensen's lips. He wanted to come, could feel the orgasm start to build in him, glorious heat that made his head spin and he tried to push down to meet Jared's thrusts. 

"So perfect," Jared moaned. "And you're all mine."

The words triggered something inside Jensen and he came harder then he ever had before, his un-touched cock spilling white over Jared's tanned skin. Jensen could hear himself call out his lover's name while his body spasmed around the hard cock. 

"Yours," he heard himself moan when the orgasm started to fade back. 

"Fuck," Jared groaned and he came deep inside Jensen, wet heat slicking the way.

Jensen felt boneless, pleasure still simmering under his skin when Jared pushed in one last time before going still and letting Jensen collapse forward, sprawled out over the older man's body. Jared loosened the tight grip he had on Jensen's hips and instead one hand slid down to feel where Jensen's rim was stretched tight around the cock still lodged inside him while the other buried in his hair. 

With careful movements Jared lifted Jensen up until the softening cock slid out of him and Jensen whimpered at the sudden empty feeling until Jared shifted their bodies so that Jensen was resting with his head tucked under Jared's chin, big hands stroking softly over his warm skin. 

"Yours?" Jensen asked hesitantly when his brain seemed to function again. "I'm... yours?"

Jared pushed at Jensen until they were face to face, holding his gaze and Jensen wanted to look away, didn't really know what he expected the other man to say. The silence stretched out and Jensen bit down on his lower lip, hoping to hold back the tears that were threatening to overflow when he realized that it was probably just something Jared had said during the act.

"I want you to be mine," Jared said then and Jensen knew his eyes were wide and mouth open.

"You do?" he asked, feeling the smile tug at the corner of his lips. 

"Hey," Jared said softly and pressed a kiss to Jensen's lips. "Even if we can't do... everything I might want to, I'm with you. No one else. I hope that makes you mine."

Jensen nodded and let the smile break out and he smiled even wider when he saw the effect his smile had on Jared, the man relaxing underneath him and smiling wide enough for dimples to cut deep dents into his cheeks. 

"Yours," Jensen said with a confidence he never had felt before.

Smiling softly Jared held him close, hands moving over Jensen's sweat damp skin in a soft caress before Jared stilled, hands not moving and Jensen could feel him drag in a deep breath.

"Why didn't you tell me you won the bike, baby?" Jared asked quitly.

It wasn't the question Jensen had been expecting, Jared's slanted eyes fixed on Jensen and making it near impossible for him to look away.

"I didn't think you would care," Jensen mumbled. "It's important to me and..."

"Oh Jen," Jared interrupted. "Of course I care. And I'm so proud of you for doing so well, you deserve getting an awesome prize."

Jensen felt himself smile wide, beaming down at Jared who pressed their lips together for a soft kiss.

"I have a thing for you," Jared said then and reached for the bedside table.

Jensen pushed up until he was kneeling beside Jared on the bed, eyes locked on the small box that Jared withdrew from the drawer. 

"I saw this, at the store..."

Jensen was about to ask what store but the question became unnecessary when Jared opened the lid and revealed a small bracelet resting on red velvet. 

"For... it's for me?" Jensen whispered and reached out to let his fingers trace over the combination of knotted leather and smooth wooden pearls. 

"Of course," Jared said and lifted it up, opening the clasp to fit it around Jensen's wrist. 

The weight of the bracelet felt good and Jensen moved his fingers over it once more and that time he saw the silver charm, a square pearl with the letter J engraved into it.

"Jared," Jensen gasped and he heard the quiver to his own voice. "It's... oh... Thank you. Thank you _so_ much."

Jared traced one finger over the single letter and then he kissed Jensen softly

"You might not want to show it to your parent's quite yet, if we give it a few weeks we can pass it off as a gift for you taking care of my dogs," Jared said and pulled Jensen close. "But you and I know that you wear it because you're mine."

The words lit a flame inside of Jensen, heat unfurling slowly when Jared kissed him time and time again, eyeing the clock on the wall Jensen realized dinner was still a far way off, and he wrapped his arms around Jared's neck, determined to show the man how much Jensen was really his.

-¤-

Sitting down at the dinner table was slightly uncomfortable and Jensen had to hide a wince at the soreness of his ass, but he and Jared had a week's worth of catching up to do after all.

"How did Mr. Padalecki's dogs seem?" his mother asked and put down a big bowl of rice on the middle of the table. 

For a few moments Jensen wondered what she was talking about but then he remembered the official reason he had spent a few hours at Jared's place after school.

"Harley and Sadie are amazing," Jensen said honestly, he didn't need to mention he hadn't seen the dogs in over a week. 

"That's good,” his dad said as he sat down at the table. "I think you're old enough to earn yourself some extra pocket money. Do you want to help him out?"

Jensen reached down into the pocket of his jeans where the bracelet was safely tucked away and he could feel the contours of the J etched into it. 

"I think I would love to help with the dogs," Jensen lied smoothly and wondered if he would be able to sneak off to Jared again the next day. 

His parents didn't need to know that Jared's friends had the dogs over the weekend after all.

-¤-


	4. The Real World Problem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Almost three years together but Jared and Jensen still has a lot of things to figure out. All it takes is one person being at the wrong place at the wrong time for things to come crashing down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 15, Jared 26)

-¤-

"Harley, down!" Jensen ordered the big dog, trying to keep the laughter out of his voice. 

When he had agreed to help Jared with his dogs, he hadn't really expected to actually do so for real but once Jared finished college and Matt and Tom had left the house, there was actually a need for a real dog sitter. That was why Jensen often found himself at Jared's place even if the man himself wasn't there.

Harley woofed happily and jumped up to put his big front paws on Jensen's chest, making the boy tumble down and land on his back on the ground. A slobbery wet dog tongue was doing its best to drown him in dog drool and Jensen couldn't keep the laughter at bay when he struggled to get free. Several hours of playing around with the dog hadn't seemed to calm the great mutt down at all, even though Sadie had collapsed in an exhausted pile of fur some forty minutes earlier, Harley showed no signs of slowing down.

"Kid, don't break anything," a voice rang out from the back door. "I'm dead on my feet and I have no urge to take you to the ER:"

Jensen looked up from his spot on the ground, looking up at Chad who stood leaning against the door frame. blue eyes slightly squinted against the sun. A slow blush crept up Jensen's cheeks, the last three years had forced him to get to know Jared's best friend but since the other two house mates had left, Chad seemed to notice Jensen in a way he never had before. More than once Jensen had seen Chad look between him and Jared with a small frown on his face. 

"I'm careful," Jensen said and finally managed to get Harley off long enough to stand up. "I didn't know you'd be home this early, I'll get going then."

Chad looked at him for just a heartbeat too long, causing Jensen to want to take a step back, but he held his ground, all too aware of how important it was for him to just be the dog sitting neighbor boy.

"Nah, hang around, kid," Chad said with a small shrug. "I'm ordering pizza and if you've played with the mutts all afternoon you must be starved. Jared should be home around the same time as the pizza."

Jensen nodded his agreement before he could stop himself, he hadn't seen Jared for three days and even though Chad's early arrival had stripped Jensen of some making out time, seeing Jared would still be better than not seeing Jared. Apparently Chad's arrival had Harley focused on something new and the big dog bounded after the older man when he walked back into the house, leaving Jensen with an almost asleep Sadie and an empty back yard. He curled up on the lounge chair closest to Sadie, making sure Chad was still busy inside before he fished his phone up out of his pocket and sent off a text to Jared, warning the other man that their alone time had been very effectively killed by Chad suddenly being social. 

By the time he heard the front door slam Jensen was close to sleep himself, hot sun making his mind drowsy. He was barely aware of his hands fiddling with the bracelet around his wrist, the bracelet that he hadn't taken off once since his thirteenth birthday when Jared had pretended to give it to him as a thanks for helping with the dogs. Jensen let one finger graze over the J etched into the silver bead before he shook his head to clear it and stood up, walking into the house. 

He had barely gotten inside the patio doors before big hands wrapped around his waist. He was tugged into the hallway leading to Chad's bedroom and the two now abandoned guest rooms and a low yelp escaped him.

"Hush," a deep voice mumbled into his ear. "Don't want Chad to hear you, right?"

Jensen leaned back into the touch, back pressed against Jared's chest and he willingly tilted his head to the side, granting the man better access when warm lips pressed against his neck.

"I think Chad was going out later," Jared said, hands sliding down to Jensen's hips. "I've called your parents, said I had to work late and asked if it was okay you stay a bit longer.” 

"They said yes?" Jensen whispered. 

"Of course, they were going out with some friends and now that you're fifteen it seems you don't have a curfew when it comes to visiting your nice, trustworthy neighbor's dogs.”

A low moan escaped Jensen when Jared rocked his hips forward, grinding his half hard dick against Jensen's ass. Jensen felt bright hot want pool in his belly.

"Dinner!" Chad called from the kitchen, causing Jared to groan into the curve of Jensen's neck.

"Damnit. Later..."

The last word was laced with a promise that sent a shiver down Jensen's spine when Jared let go of him he quickly turned around and pushed up on his tip toes to press a soft kiss against the man's lips. 

"Tease," Jared chuckled and licked at Jensen's lips for just a second before he grinned and walked towards the kitchen.

-¤-

Jensen reached out for a handful of popcorn, unable to stop himself from smiling when he thought back to his and Jared's first meeting. When he looked up to find Jared staring at him, hazel eyes dark with lust, he knew that he wasn't the only one. 

"Heading out," Chad said, startling the both of them. "Don't wait up for me, Jay. And don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

"There's stuff you wouldn't do?" Jared asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Dude, I have limits!" Chad protested before he grabbed his jacket off the peg by the door. "Anyway, have fun and all, see you around kid."

The door slammed shut and Jensen leaned back into the softness of the couch, able to relax for the first time since Chad had found him losing the wrestling match with Harley.

"Does he know I have a name?" Jensen muttered.

"Who knows, it's Chad," Jared said and stepped closer, a smile on his lips. 

Removing the bowl of popcorn from Jensen's lap, Jared pushed him down into the couch, big hands fitting over Jensen's hip once more. Then Jared's lips were on his, warm tongue licking his mouth open and Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck with a low moan. 

Kissing Jared was intoxicating, Jensen wasn't sure how it could just keep on getting better and better but he wasn't about to protest. Not when his soft t-shirt was pushed up and warm hands caressed his skin with slow circles,

"I want you like this," Jared mumbled against his lips before pulling away, sitting up on the couch.

Jensen was seconds away from asking but the question became redundant because Jared dragged him up and Jensen didn't hesitate to straddle the other man's legs. The ease with which Jared moved him around still made Jensen's breath caught in his chest; Jensen himself might have grown since they met but Jared had bulked up as well and he had no problems lifting Jensen up and placing him where he wanted him. 

"Think I can get you off, just like this?" Jared asked and took a firm grip of Jensen's hips, holding him still while he rolled his own hips up.

Pleasure sparked through Jensen's body at the perfect friction against this own cock and his head fell back, body arching into Jared's as he searched for more pressure against his hard cock. He had no doubts Jared could get him off just like that, if the older man would actually have will power left to not spread Jensen's legs and push into him deep and hard. 

"Yeah," Jensen gasped and tried to push his fingers under Jared's clothing, needing to feel skin under his hands.

"No," Jared said and he locked one big hand around both of Jensen's wrists. "No touching. I can hold you still just like this, make you come like this, riding my cock through the clothes."

Jensen struggled against the grip but all Jared did was change his grip, holding both of Jensen's hands behind his back, leaning forward to press soft kisses against the curve of Jensen's neck. Sensations sparked through Jensen's body and he tried to roll back down against Jared, searching for more friction to push himself towards the orgasm he so desperately needed. 

"Gorgeous," Jared mumbled and pushed his hips up once more. "I've missed you, the way you feel, the way you taste."

The words made pleasure soar even higher and Jensen pushed against the restraint of Jared's hand around his wrists and he opened his mouth to plead for more just when a voice cut through the air. 

"I knew _something_ was up but... what the _fuck_?"

The grip on his wrists was released in an instant and Jensen fell to the floor when Jared practically flew up off the couch and spun around to face Chad who was standing in the doorway, staring at the scene in front of him. 

"Chad," Jared gasped. "I... look... I can... explain. This isn't..."

"What it seems?" Chad asked. "What the _actual_ fuck is it then? 'Cause it kinda fucking looks like you're fucking the neighbor kid."

Jensen managed to get back on his feet just in time to see Jared flinch at the words, pushing one huge hand through his hair but not really looking at either Jensen or Chad, instead looking down at the floor and breathing in deep, ragged lungfuls of air. 

"Look, Chad," he said slowly when the silence stretched out, a heavy, solid weight in the room. "I can... well I can't explain but it _isn't_ what you think it is. This means..."

Whatever Jared had meant to say next, was something Jensen didn't want to hear, he was terrified of Jared saying it didn't mean anything. That _they_ didn't mean anything and without thinking about it he turned towards the patio door and ran as fast as he could, ignoring Jared calling out his name behind him.

-¤-

The old shed was standing at the edge of the yard, insides full of tools and garden equipment and Jensen knew that the tall bushes surrounding the building made him hidden from view. He let the tears fall down his cheeks, arms wrapped around himself like a protective shield.

Close to three years, it was more than he had ever hoped for when he had walked over to Jared's place that first night so long ago. Now that he knew what it was like to be with Jared he thought he would never be able to get enough of it. But the choice had been taken away from him. Jensen caught himself wondering what Jared had been planning to say when he ran out. This means nothing? The phone in his pocket vibrated and he didn't need to look at it to know who was calling but he fished it out and shut it off, letting it fall to the ground beside him.

Jensen wondered what would happen next, how long it would take before he saw Jared with someone else, because why would Jared want to be with him after all? Whatever had been between them, Jensen knew it was over now that Chad had found out, why would Jared want to be with someone he couldn't be proud of? Biting down low on his lip Jensen wondered how he never figured that he came with an expiration date.

-¤-  
-¤-

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Jared said time and time again.

"Jared," Chad said and Jared felt a hand land on his shoulder. 

"I can't go after him," Jared mumbled, realizing he was standing in the door way. "Damnit, I can't... not like I could explain to his parents that..."

"Are you even listening to yourself?" Chad asked and the hand gripped tighter.

"Why did you come back?" Jared asked, suddenly aware of his friend’s presence. "You were supposed to be out all evening."

Chad let go of Jared then and took a few steps back into the room, looking just a distraught as Jared himself felt and for several long moments the two friends just stood staring at each other, loud breathing the only thing breaking the silence. It was Chad who gave in first, a deep sigh leaving him as he collapsed down into an armchair.

"I kinda figured something was going on, more than the dog sitting thing," Chad admitted. "But I didn't expect this. Jesus fuck, Jared. He's just a _kid_ damnit."

Jared turned and looked towards Jensen's house, fingers itching to find the boy, wrap his arms around the slender body and never let go. But he knew that wasn't an option and instead he turned to Chad. 

"He's... I know, okay? I fucking know," he sighed. "But couldn't you have asked me, confronted me, yelled at _me_ about this?"

Chad stared at Jared, eyes full of incredulity and it was obvious his friend thought he was full on insane. 

"I'm sorry, did I go about it the wrong way about you having the hots for the neighbor’s kid? Your own damn dog sitter?" Chad asked and Jared could see the moment things clicked into place in Chad's head. "Wait, what the fuck... Jay, how long has this been going on?"

Jared didn't need to answer his friend, the silence between them was answer enough and Chad was up on his feet in an instant, cursing loudly, his hands were clenched into fists.

"Is that why... damnit, he was _twelve_ then," Chad spat out. "That was about the time you helped on that teen hotline thing, was that to calm yourself for feeling bad about it?"

"No!" Jared protested. "How can you think that? I did that to help people like Jensen..."

He knew he had said too much when Chad's eyes went wide with understanding and his friend almost stumbled back, but the words were out and there was no way for him to take them back.

"You met him on that hotline," Chad said and it was a statement, not a question. "That's... no. I can't... You should tell... no screw that, _I'm_ gonna go talk with his parents right the fuck now. What the hell were you thinking?"

Chad was halfway to the door before Jared's brain caught up with him and he exploded into movement, pushing himself in between Chad and the door and putting one big hand against his friend's chest, holding him back and ignoring the way Chad's eyes shot daggers at him. 

"You can't tell them!" he ordered and ignored Chad's attempts to push past him. "Stop, I fucking won’t let you."

"What, too ashamed of your little underage sextoy?" Chad spat. "You can't abuse him like that."

"Don't fucking talk about him like that," Jared snarled, fear and worry giving way to anger. 

It wasn't something he had planned to do, but he found himself with Chad pushed up against the wall beside the door, blue eyes wide with shock and he looked down to where Jared's hands were gripping his shoulders tight, holding him in place. Even though Chad fought back Jared had no plans to let the man go, all his brain was focused on keeping Chad right where he were.

"Let go of me," Chad protested. "What the fuck?"

"He's not a damn _sextoy_ ," Jared pointed out. "And I can't let you go talk to his parents, you can't do that to him!"

Chad sputtered at that, indignant sounds when he tried to get free once more. 

"To him? I'm not doing anything to him," Chad spat. "You're the one doing _things_ to him, and now you try to protect him? Are you completely insane?"

"You will hurt him," Jared said, softer than he had meant to. "What if you tell his parents, how do you think they'd react? They would punish him, ground him, not let him be a scout anymore. I can't do that to him, he loves the scouts but if this got out... No Chad, do whatever you want to _me_ , but I won’t let you hurt Jensen."

Something shifted ever so slightly between them, the tension brought down a peg when Chad leaned back against the wall, no longer fighting Jared's grip but Jared still didn't let go of him. 

"Look," he continued. "I'll... damn, I'll stop seeing him if that's what you need, I will tell him... something. That I can't see him anymore but please, don't ruin his life."

Chad closed his eyes, head falling back against the wall hard enough for both of them to wince but for a while he didn't say anything, just stood still until his breathing was calm once more and only then did he open his eyes to look at Jared. 

"You..." he started but then he fell silent once more. "You... care about him?"

Jared frowned and his hands fell from Chad's shoulders when he took a step back. The anger that had been coming off Chad in waves had died away some and even though Chad still seemed ready to explode there was something in his eyes that made Jared go for honesty. 

"Of course I care about him," Jared said with forced calm. "I've been with him for almost three years. Chad, I love him."

Whatever Chad had been expecting to hear, those words clearly weren't it because his friend sank down on the floor, back against the wall and eyes still locked on Jared. But even though his mouth was opening and closing, no words came out. 

"Are you... _in_ love with him?" Chad asked, almost choking on the words. 

The words had Jared's brain skidding to an abrupt stop and he couldn't do more than blink a few times while he processed them. That he loved Jensen was something he took for granted, who could not love the young boy that was all eagerness and a bright mind? He knew he loved fucking Jensen, same eagerness shining through when the boy wrapped slender legs around Jared's waist. But being _in_ love with Jensen? It was something he hadn't really considered before. Once he did, however, the answer was easy.

"Yes."

"Well," Chad said slowly. "That complicates things."

"Really Chad," Jared pleaded. "Don't tell his parents, I know you're trying to do the right thing but... don't tell them. Please?"

He could see his friend hesitating, battling with what he knew was right and what Jared was begging for.

"I wont tell," Chad said finally in a defeated tone. "For now. But you know this is ten levels of wrong. He's just a _kid_. This ends now."

Jared felt his heart drop to the floor but he nodded. Anything to keep Jensen safe.

-¤-

The house felt silent, despite the explosions and shouting emanating from the action flick he was watching and despite Chad moving around in the kitchen. Things between them were strained to say the least, awkward tense moments filling the air and more than once Jared had caught his friend looking at him like he was trying to figure him out. All Jared could think of was that it had been days since he last saw Jensen and he wondered what excuse the boy had given his parents as to why he didn't take care of the dogs anymore. Harley and Sadie seemed to be just as depressed as their daddy, both dogs lay splayed out at his feet and every now and then they looked around the room and then back up at Jared with sad eyes, he was sure they were wondering where their little friend had gone. 

"Beer?"

Jared jumped at the word, he hadn't heard Chad approaching from the kitchen but the bottle of beer held out to him, slippery with condensation, was just what he needed and he accepted it gratefully. The liquid felt soothing as he raised the bottle to his lips, emptying one third of if in one go. It wasn't until he lowered it to rest against his thigh that he realized Chad was looking at him and not the movie. 

"What?" Jared asked, defences going up in an instant. 

Chad twirled his own bottle between nimble fingers, beads of condensation falling from the bottle and down to darken the fabric of the man's jeans. 

"Tell me about him," Chad said finally, eyes firm on Jared's face. "I want to understand."

"Chad," Jared said in a tired voice. "I'm not sure..."

"No, listen here," Chad said with a firmness that Jared had seldom heard from his friend. "I've been more than understanding about this so far, but now I want you to tell me. So tell me."

It wasn't something Jared wanted to do, the words were hard to get out, but he knew Chad wouldn't let it go, the man could be worse than a dog with a bone. To his surprise he found that once he started talking, the words flowed, he _needed_ to tell someone about the boy that had wormed himself so perfectly into Jared's life. Chad remained silent while Jared told him all about boyscouts, insecurities and how Jensen had become more and more important as the years went by. When he finally fell silent and lifted his lukewarm beer to his lips Chad's bottle sat half empty and forgotten on the table. 

"He's why you haven't had a date in years," Chad said. "I thought it was just 'cause of school... not because you had a _boyfriend_."

Hearing that word used about Jensen felt surreal and Jared bit back the urge to snap at his friend, to scream about the fact that the first time he could think of Jensen as a boyfriend, it was when it was already too late. 

"Not like I could ever take him out for dates," Jared muttered into his beer. "At least now he can get that."

Chad frowned at that for a moment but then he reached for his own beer, emptying it in a few deep swallows and grimacing at the stale taste of it. He didn't ask Jared if he wanted another one, just walked to the kitchen and grabbed two more beers before sitting down once more. 

"You mean with someone else?" Chad asked.

Just the thought of Jensen with someone else had Jared closing his eyes and breathing in deep, trying to pull himself back together once more but the image had already been planted in his mind. Jensen with someone his own age, someone that couldn't lift Jensen up and hold him against a wall. Someone that probably wouldn't love to wrap the boy up close and listen to a stream of words about the latest scout meeting. Someone that couldn't give Jensen everything that Jared could. 

"If it makes him happy," Jared said quietly. 

"Oh fuck this," Chad snapped and to Jared's surprise the man launched himself at Jared. It wasn't until Chad withdrew once more than Jared realized the man had swiped his phone and was scrolling through his contacts.

"Chad! What the hell?" Jared exclaimed and tried to get his phone back but Chad was already pushing call. "Give it back, who are you..."

"Jensen, this is Chad. Can you come over here? Now?"

Jared froze in place and stared at his friend with an open mouth, shocked. At the same time he tried to imagine what Jensen must have thought about Jared's name flashing on his screen. But at least the boy had answered his phone, Jared had been pretty sure he wouldn't. He was happy to be proven wrong. 

"Because I say so," Chad went on. "Five minutes. Be here then."

He ended the call and tossed the phone back to Jared who barely managed to catch it before it fell to the floor. Five minutes. If Chad was right then he would see Jensen in five minutes, too bad he had no idea why his friend had ordered the boy over and the smug look on Chad's face told him there was no point to even asking, but that didn't stop Jared.

"Why did you do that?" he hissed. "I've let him be, just like I promised. Don't drag him through this again, it's better for him to get over this as soon as possible."

Chad merely shrugged and went to the patio doors and slid them open. For a moment Jared wondered why but then he realized Jensen would most likely take that way to hide himself some and Chad had clearly figured that out as well. Suddenly Harley and Sadie practically bounced up from the floor and they almost tackled Chad down in their attempts to get outside. The reason for their eagerness became quite apparent when a surprised yelp sounded from the garden and then Jensen's low voice soothing the two dogs. Jared didn't need to look outside to know that Jensen was crouched down between the dogs, hands sharing out pats between the two of them. 

"Jensen," Chad said. "Can you come inside please?"

"Of course," Jensen's voice answered. "No, you two stay outside. Behave!"

Jared's eyes locked on the door when a small figure appeared and Jensen's gaze locked with his the second he stepped through the door, green eyes wide with nervousness. 

"Feel free to sit down," Chad offered but the boy didn't move an inch. "Look, kid, I just want a few words. Nothing bad, promise."

"You wont tell my parents?" Jensen asked then and his gaze flickered from Jared to the blond. 

"You don't want me to?" Chad asked in a level tone. 

"Of course not," Jensen said and bit down on his lower lip. "Then Jared would be in trouble and I don't want that just because he did something I asked him to do."

"What you two have been doing is illegal," Chad said and Jared hissed out a low warning that had Chad glare at him. "Calm down, I'm just saying."

Jensen fidgeted slightly, hands clenching and un-clenching time and time again.

"Don't you want to date?" Chad asked, clearly shocking Jensen as much as the question shocked Jared. 

"What?" the boy asked. "Of course I want to date."

The words settled like a hard weight in Jared's belly but then Jensen took a small step closer, hand twitching like he wanted to reach out for Jared. 

"But I’d rather have Jared," he added with a strength to his voice that Jared wasn't expecting. 

Chad looked between them, blue eyes calculating for a moment but then he nodded towards Jared. 

"Tell him what you told me," he ordered. "How you feel about him."

Jensen seemed to shrink in on himself at those words and Jared could feel sadness radiating off the boy in waves. That was enough for him to do anything, everything, to make the boy smile again. 

"I told you that I love him," Jared started and was rewarded with Jensen's gaze flickering with hope. "I said that I'm _in_ love with him."

Light returned to Jensen's eyes, hope soaring up like a wildfire and his whole body was trembling when Jared stood up to look at his friend, hoping so badly that he was right in his hopes of what would happen next. 

"I love him too," Jensen said so quietly the words were barely audible. 

"Jay," Chad said then. "Go hug your boyfriend, I think he needs you."

The simple words took Jared's breath away but he was moving without thinking about it, crossing to floor to get closer to Jensen and the boy exploded into motion, throwing himself into Jared's arms with a small sob. 

"Boyfriend?" Jensen asked softly.

"Are you sure about this?" Jared asked and met Chad's eyes over the top of Jensen's head. 

"No," Chad said with a small chuckle. "But you've been miserable these last few days and I don't like that. You've been happy for the last three years and I guess I know why. I don't understand but... I don't need to. Just be happy, both of you."

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared's arms around him was grounding, soothing, something he thought he would never have again and Jensen clung to the other man for all he was worth. When his mouth came down to cover Jensen's the boy couldn't help but moan into the kiss, hands rising to tangle in Jared's hair.

"I'm not sure I want to see...”

Chad's mumble was too low to really penetrate Jensen's mind, not when all he could think of was Jared and the word that had finally been spoken. 

Boyfriends. 

For almost three years it had been a word he barely had dared to think, much less dare to speak aloud, but suddenly it was out there and Jared hadn't flinched away at it, instead his big hands rested on Jensen's hips, holding him still while Jensen tried to push closer. He needed to feel Jared, have muscles pressed up against his body but for a while he let himself get lost in the wet slide of lips and tongues.

"I'm gonna burn in hell for thinking you two kissing is hot," Chad said with a deep sigh.

Jared started laughing into the kiss and Jensen groaned, pulling away enough to be able to hide his flaming face against Jared's broad chest.

"I'll just... yeah..." Chad said and motioned towards the door. "No defiling the couch while I'm gone. Seriously. I have limits!"

The front door slammed and Jared was still laughing, a deep rumble that traveled from his body to Jensen's, long arms still locked around Jensen.

"I didn't know supportive Chad would be quite so..." Jared chuckled. 

Jensen really didn't care, he was alone with Jared for the first time in days, and this time he _knew_ that Chad would know to keep away for quite awhile. There was no way Jensen wouldn't make the most of their alone time, they had some serious catching up to do.

"Jen, hey, wait..." Jared said when Jensen pushed hands up under his shirt. "We should... c'mon..."

The words turned into a low moan when Jensen's hands reached the fly of his jeans and popped the top button open. 

"Please," Jensen begged and looked up at Jared. "No talking? I need this, need _you_."

He expected to have to beg and plead more but instead Jared wrapped one huge hand around his wrists and practically dragged Jensen towards the stairs leading down to the basement, the two of them almost falling down the steps when they tried to walk down while still kissing each other hungrily. 

"Fuck this," Jared growled at last and lifted Jensen up.

The movement wasn't as easy as it had been when they first met, but the thrill that ran through Jensen was the same as it had always been and he wrapped his legs around Jared's waist, allowing the man to carry him down the rest of the stairs. 

"Jared," he gasped when Jared sat down at the edge of his bed, Jensen still on his lap.

Jared's hands cupped his ass, fingers splayed wide and Jensen trembled at the touch, his body was starved for attention and he let his own arms untangle to pull at his own clothes, needing more skin on skin than Jared seemed to offer. 

"I wanna see you," Jared said and moved his hands to grip his wrists. "Do it slow."

With those words he pushed Jensen off his lap. It took a few long moments before Jensen realized what Jared was asking of him. His boyfriend wanted him to strip for him. His first instinct was to say no, to protest but then he saw the look in Jared's eyes, so much emotions that it took Jensen's breath away and underneath all the _need_ and _want_ he could see something more. That was enough for him to take a trembling step back, slowly lifting his hands to touch the collar of his short sleeved shirt, pushing the top button open.

Jared's gaze on him was like a physical touch, heat travelling over his skin and it made Jensen straighten his back, holding Jared's gaze with his own while he slowly unbuttoned the shirt. With the last button open he shrugged slightly, letting the shirt fall back enough to bare his shoulders. He let it hang loose around his body for a long moment before another shrug made it fall down to the floor.

"Beautiful..." Jared mumbled. 

The word had Jensen smiling despite the blush staining his cheeks and slowly creeping down his neck and chest. It had never been like this between them before, never so much emotions hanging in the air.

"Go on," Jared said at the same time as he pulled his own shirt off, revealing miles of tanned skin for Jensen. 

Jensen's mouth went dry at the sight, but he swallowed and took a deep breath before he let his hands fall down to the waistband of his soft worn jeans, popping one button and then slowly wriggling his hips to get the tight fabric off. The material clung to his hips for another moment before they fell to the floor, leaving Jensen standing in just a pair of black boxer briefs and he couldn't hold back the shiver that ran down his spine. He turned around slowly, letting Jared get a good look at his backside and before he could change his mind he leaned forward slightly, slipping the last garment off before spinning around to face the older man once more.

"Jesus fuck," Jared groaned, making quick work of his own clothes. "Come here."

A big hand was held out to him and Jensen reached out to take it, letting Jared pull him down until he was once more straddled across the man's lap, their bare cocks brushing together. It didn't seem like Jared wanted to waste any more time, Jensen could feel the man reaching for the beside table at the same time as a warm mouth descended on his own, swallowing down every pleading he had been ready to do. 

The sound of the lube popping open was loud in the otherwise silent house, the only other sound their ragged breathing. The first touch of cold, slicked fingers against his opening had Jensen arching his back, pushing against the questing fingers. 

"More, please Jay, need more," he mumbled, pushing his tongue into Jared's mouth once more.

Jared didn't leave him begging: a long finger pushed inside of Jensen, slight burn that quickly was drowned out by pleasure when the finger found that spot deep inside that always had Jensen seeing stars. He gripped Jared's shoulders to try and find leverage enough to push down hard against Jared's finger, making it slide even deeper. The kisses between them turned deeper, more desperate, with each push of Jared's finger. By the time a second finger followed the first one Jensen was shaking, pleading into the kiss that had his head spinning with the lack of oxygen. 

"Want..." Jensen heard himself mumble, not knowing what he really was asking for. "Need..."

"Yeah, okay..." Jared answered, sounding just as dazed as Jensen felt.

Sliding down from Jared's lap, Jensen watched as the man moved back on the bed until his back was resting against the headboard, hard cock curving up against his belly. He held one big hand out, reaching for Jensen, who eagerly got up on his knees before crawling over to Jared. The man’s big hand stroked over his cheek and then down his back, fingers ghosting over the curve of his spine. Jensen pressed a soft kiss to Jared's lips before he turned around and placed himself on Jared's lap, back against the man's strong chest.

"I like you on my lap like this," Jared said, breathing into Jensen's hair.

Jensen could only agree, he felt very safe when one of Jared's arms snaked around his waist, holding him still even though Jensen felt the urge to push back against the hard cock pressing against his lower back.  
"But I think I'd like you even more on my lap like this..."

Jensen gasped when Jared's hands gripped his hips tight, lifting him up until Jensen could feel the blunt pressure around his lube slicked opening.

"Want..." he mumbled, trying to push down against the hard length. "Please, Jared. I want you... I love you..."

At the last word Jared tilted Jensen's head to the side and pressed his lips to the tender spot just under Jensen's ear before lowering him down slowly. Jensen trembled at the slow penetration, feeling himself stretch wide around the hard cock pushing into him.

"I love you too," Jared breathed against his skin. "Didn't think I would get to have this again."

The thought of never feeling Jared inside him, wrapped around him, wasn't something that Jensen could even think about, instead he flexed his muscles around the hardness filling him, circling his hips until Jared groaned and pushed him down with one hard shove until Jensen was sitting fully on his lap. A burn cut through the pleasure for just a moment before his body adjusted to the familiar feel of Jared inside of him. Jensen's head fell back on Jared's shoulder, he felt like his entire body was suddenly boneless, the only thing that held him up was Jared's hands on his hips.

"I..." Jensen moaned when Jared lifted him, easily holding his weight up with strong hands.

Jared held him still, cock barely holding Jensen open and Jensen couldn't help but squirm in the grip, desperately needing more. But Jared wouldn't give him much, instead he held Jensen still and rocked up into him, just working the head in and out of Jensen's body until Jensen was almost sobbing with desperation.

"Please... fuck me already..." he pleaded. "I wanna feel you... make me yours..."

"I love hearing you beg for it," Jared moaned, grinding his cock into Jensen. "But... right now I think I need to..."

"What are you... no..." Jensen protested when Jared lifted him up and off. 

The protests died out when Jared placed Jensen on all fours and got up on his knees behind him, not giving Jensen a second to gather himself before Jared pushed deep inside with one hard thrust that had Jensen's hands clenching the sheet. 

"Jay..." he moaned out loudly and arched his back, pushing back against Jared.

"Just mine," Jared moaned, fingers gripping Jensen's hips hard enough to bruise. 

Jensen moaned as each drag of Jared's cock against his insides sent shocks of pleasure through his body. He felt like everything else faded away around him, the only thing he could think of was Jared claiming him in the best way possible. 

"You're so hot like this," Jared said, long fingers moving from Jensen's hips, brushing the tips of his fingers against where Jensen was stretched tight around his cock. "You take it so well, you moan so fucking pretty, Jen."

Jensen's head was spinning with the intense pleasure, to into the moment to even be embarrassed by Jared's dirty words washing over him and even though he tried to get words out they were silenced by small moans each time Jared bottomed out. 

"Think you could come just from this?" Jared asked and angled his hips, making the next thrust hit Jensen's prostate dead on. "Just from my cock inside you?"

-¤-  
-¤-

The sound that spilled from Jensen's lips was one of the most amazing things Jared had ever heard, breathy little moans and whimpers each time he slammed into the slender body. He could feel the moment when the pleasure become too much and the boy almost collapsed down on the bed, Jared's hands on his hips the only thing that held him up.

"Yes," Jensen moaned into the comforter. "Please, more..."

Jared looked down at the boy beneath him: creamy freckled skin on display and the stretch of his pink rim glistening wet where Jared was fucking into him with hard thrusts. A low keening escaped the boy and Jared could feel the tight muscles almost fluttering around his cock and he knew full well that a few hard thrusts was all it would take to push Jensen over the edge. He thought about it for a moment, seeing Jensen fall apart before him was always a wonderful thing to watch, but he wanted it to last, wanted Jensen to be strung out mess by the time he finally let the boy come. So instead he lowered his pace until it was nothing more than a tortuously slow drag.

"No no," Jensen whined. "So close... _please_... so close... need..."

The boy whimpered, trembling when Jared let go of his hips and it didn't seem like his slender limbs could hold him up any longer because he collapsed forward on the bed, Jared's hard cock sliding from tight heat. Jared pushed two fingers into the boy and Jensen arched under him, body writhing on the bed.

"I will make you come, Jen," Jared promised and dragged the tip of his fingers over the boy's prostate. "Will make you come so hard that you _scream_."

With that promise he withdrew his fingers and knelt between Jensen's spread legs, admiring the sweet curve of his ass and the place where his rim looked pink and used, small hole slightly open from Jared's fingers and cock. He leaned forward, balancing himself with his hands on each side of Jensen's body before he slowly pushed inside once more. Jared liked what the boy had grown into, and as much as he liked Jensen for who he was, he couldn't help but loving how small Jensen was in comparison to himself, a part of him hoped that Jensen would always be smaller than he was. 

Jensen's hands clenched the sheet until Jared's bigger hands locked them in his, holding the boy still as he slowly fucked into the boy's willing body, relishing in the needy noises being pushed out of Jensen with each deep thrust. He knew that the new position made Jensen's hard cock rub against the sheets, adding extra sensations to the slow love making. A part of him expected Jensen to plead again, to beg for _more_ and _harder_ but the boy remained silent apart from the low moans that were muffled into the comforter. Jared let his lips travel over Jensen's neck, licking over sweat damp skin and finding the place that had Jensen shivering beneath him, moans turning into a low, keening sound just before Jensen's whole body locked down around him and Jensen cried out in pleasure.

Having Jensen fall apart beneath him was always the most amazing thing, but for some reason it was better than it ever had been before, emotions tangling into the physical pleasure and Jensen's orgasm tipped him over the edge, release rippling through him. Jensen was shaking beneath him, hands clenching in Jared's grip, wet heat tight around Jared's cock, pushing the release higher and higher until all Jared could think of was the boy beneath him: his boyfriend moaning out his name.

"Love... you..." Jensen gasped out, tilting his head to the side and Jared took the chance to claim the boy's mouth in a deep kiss.

-¤-

Jensen's hair was soft when Jared carded his fingers through the boy's hair and for a while Jared thought the boy had fallen asleep where he was laying almost on top of Jared, plush lips brushing his collar bone, but then a sigh was breathed against his skin. 

"I didn't think I would get to have this again."

The words were so soft that Jared thought he hadn't heard correctly at first but then Jensen shifted, hiding his face further against the curve of Jared's neck.

"You thought I would leave you," Jared said, pulling Jensen closer.

"You _did_ leave me," Jensen answered. "I just... even before that I guess... I figured if anyone ever found out you would deny it, be ashamed of me."

Despite the light post-orgasm bliss that still fogged his mind, Jared could easily hear the hint of pain in Jensen's voice and he cursed himself for not realizing sooner what the boy meant to him. Taking a deep breath he pushed the teenage boy up until he could see his face, hands cupping Jensen's face when he tried to look away.

"Jen, you know that what’s between us... well, it isn't something many people would accept," he said softly. "But I want you to know that I would _never_ be ashamed of you, that was never what this was about."

Jensen's green gaze flickered away for a moment before the boy relaxed slightly against Jared's chest.

"So, it's not just about sex?" Jensen asked quietly. "I mean... you're not just with me 'cause of some... kink?"

Jared gripped Jensen's body tightly and rolled over until he was hovering over the slender body splayed out on his soft bed. He let his gaze travel over smooth skin before he looked into Jensen's eyes again. 

"I will be honest with you," he breathed against the soft curve of Jensen's lips. "At first, it might have been a kink that made me want you, that made me need to have you spread out naked before me and moaning my name in pleasure. But falling for you? That was never a kink. I didn't fall in love with you because you're young and pretty, I fell in love with you because you're _Jensen_."

He could see the exact moment when Jensen started believing what he was saying, the deep green of his eyes turning soft and warm and that was the only warning Jared got before Jensen wrapped both arms around his neck, pulling him in for a deep kiss.

"Of course," Jared added when he came up for air. "It's an awesome bonus that you look ridiculously hot in a boyscout uniform."

Jensen's laugh rang out in the room and Jared's cock picked up interest in round two with the way Jensen's body was moving beneath his own.

"Go," Jensen said with a soft shove against Jared's chest. "Go let the dog back inside, and then come back here again."

"Do I have to?" Jared laughed, pressing kisses against Jensen's smiling lips. "I'm sure they're happy outside."

"Yes," Jensen said and it was obvious he was trying to look serious. "If you don't then people will come looking once they start to bark, and I really don't want anyone walking in on us when I'm on my knees for you, showing you how much I've missed you."

Jared kissed Jensen hard and deep and by the time he managed to drag himself off the boy and upstairs he was rock hard, eager to get back to his amazing jail bait of a boyfriend.

-¤-


	5. The Block Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having a secret relationship is so much harder when surrounded by all your neighbors. Even more so when said neighbors include your underage boyfriend's parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 15, Jared 26)

  
-¤-

"Please please please," Jensen gasped and tried to push back against the man behind him.

"So eager," Jared chuckled deeply.

Jensen turned his head to glare at Jard from under sun bleached bangs but his boyfriend just smiled, hands still locked around Jensen's hips, holding him in place while Jared slowly pushed inside. The hands held Jensen up enough for him to stand on his tip toes, offering his ass to Jared, and it made it impossible for him to find purchase enough to do more than whimper and plead. Stilling inside him, Jared rolled his lips slightly, causing the head of his cock to brush Jensen's insides.

"You're such a tease," Jensen whined.

"And you love it, don't you?" 

Bracing himself against the wall Jensen turned around to glare at Jared, but just when he was about say something more Jared bottomed out inside him with one hard thrust that had Jensen's hands sliding over the wall in front of him, desperate to find something to hold on to. 

"Yes..." he gasped. "I love it _so_ much."

"Of course you do," Jared said, amusement clear in his voice. "Love being all stretched around me, right? Feel my cock so deep inside you, gonna feel it for days."

The thought had Jensen's mind spinning, memories from the day before when his whole body had been aching after several rounds of Jared pushing into him deep and hard. It was awesome but it did make family dinners a bit awkward when he couldn't really sit down without feeling the memory of Jared inside him. A high pitched whine fell from him when Jared pulled out, leaving Jensen desperate and craving more. 

"I love that I can still do this..." Jared groaned and quickly turned Jensen to face him.

"Do wha... oh my _god_..."

The question was suddenly interrupted by Jared lifting Jensen up and pinning him to the wall, stepping close. Jensen didn't think much about it before he wrapped his legs around the taller man's hips, letting Jared manhandle him into position. He was pushed down with a hard shove, Jared's cock slamming into him deep.

"Just like that, so good," Jared moaned against Jensen's skin.

Tightly wrapped around Jared's body the boy felt himself go weak, unable to do more than cling to Jared while the man fucked into him deep and hard. 

"Still feel so fucking perfect around me," Jared gasped. "Swear, you're made for me..."

With those words he pushed one big hand down between their bodies, wrapping knowing fingers around Jensen's hard cock, pushing the pleasure higher and higher. A low keening sound escaped Jensen's lips when Jared's finger brushed the sensitive vein at the underside of Jensen's cock, making him tremble in Jared's arms. He pushed his fingers into Jared's sweat damp hair, trailing open mouthed kisses over the man's jaw until their lips met and Jared swallowed each sound spilling from Jensen's lips.

Each thrust of Jared's hips had his cock drag against Jensen's prostate, making Jensen cling to his boyfriend when he felt the orgasm build, rising inside him like lava. The combined sensations of Jared inside him, hand around his dick and strong body pinning Jensen to the wall more than he could take.

"Jay..." he moaned into his boyfriend's mouth.

"Come for me, Jensen," Jared ordered, fingers sliding up over the head of Jensen's cock, sliding through the pre-come. That was all it took for Jensen to come hard.

"Oh... oh... so good," Jensen whimpered, trying to push down even harder on Jared's cock. "Love... you..."

"Love you too," Jared moaned back.

The man's hand fell from Jensen's cock, instead gripping Jensen's hips tight and Jensen whimpered when he felt Jared easily lifting his pliant body, thrusting in deep and hard until he came with a half choked moan, muffled into Jensen's hair.

Jensen felt himself go boneless in Jared's arms, satisfaction running thick and hot through his veins when Jared held him still while they both came down from their climaxes.

-¤-

"I like seeing you like that."

Jensen turned around to look at his boyfriend, catching a teasing smile before Jared's arms wrapped around him and soft lips pressed down over his.

"It’s weird that you get off on me putting my clothes _on_ ," Jensen laughed when Jared let him go again.

"Yeah, probably," Jared agreed and helped Jensen tie the red scarf in place. "But damn kid, you look amazing in this thing."

With a small eye roll Jensen took a step back, eying himself in the mirror to make sure his scout uniform wasn't too wrinkled from when Jared had tore it off him, throwing it on the bed before pushing Jensen up against the wall. He was pleased to see that he looked at least presentable enough for his parents to not ask too many questions once he got home.

"I'm not a kid," he said almost by default. "You'll end up like Chad, I'm not even sure he knows my name."

"I know your name," Jared said and came to stand right behind Jensen. "Haven't I've called out your name enough times while..."

Jensen didn't really listen to more of what Jared said, instead he stared into the mirror, taking in the way they looked together, Jared's big form towering over Jensen's much smaller body. The difference between them made heat crackle low under Jensen's skin but he knew they didn't have time for a round two, not if Jensen wanted to get him in time for dinner and avoid a slew of questions that he really didn't have an answer to. His reasons to go home faded away some when Jared's hands landed on his hips, long fingers finding their way in under Jensen's shirt to stroke over the sensitive skin underneath.

"Jared," Jensen tried to protest.

"Sure you can't stay a bit longer?" Jared teased, dipping fingers inside the waist line of Jensen's shorts. 

"No," Jensen mumbled but for a moment he let himself lean back into Jared's body, meeting his boyfriend's gaze in the mirror. 

"Will you come over later then?" Jared asked.

"Maybe? If I can get away, I’ve got homework as well. This stupid math assignment is killing me," Jensen sighed.

"I could help with that," Jared offered. "I'm sure your parents would allow you over for a study session after all. Right?"

Jared pulled his hands out from under Jensen's clothes, smoothing down the wrinkles in what was clearly a poor excuse to let his hands roam over Jensen's body. Jensen smiled when Jared's fingers played with the ends of the scarf, the man leaning down to kiss the top of Jensen's head. 

"Would there actually be studying done?" Jensen asked with a smile. "I really mean it, Jay, I need to do this homework."

"Cross my heart," Jared quickly promised. "We can sit in the kitchen, it's all safe and stuff and you know that Chad will complain if we make out in front of him."

"Or get turned on," Jensen pointed out.

"Or get turned on," Jared agreed. "Which will turn us off, so either way there will be studying done."

"Fine, I'll ask them. And Jay? Thank you."

"And once we're done with studying, you can show me how grateful you are for the help," Jared said and pushed Jensen back against his half hard dick.

Jensen thought that was the best idea he had heard in quite some time and he turned around to let Jared kiss him breathless before he had to pull himself away or he would be late. 

"See you later," he said with a soft kiss to his boyfriend’s lips.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen sat chewing on the cap of his pen and Jared really didn't think he could be blamed for not fully focusing on the rather simple equations in front of him. What with such a gorgeous boy sitting pressed up next to him, thigh pushing against thigh and Jensen's arm brushing his whenever the boy moved.

"I don't understand _why_ ," Jensen whined suddenly.

"Why what?" Jared asked, focusing on his boyfriend’s petulant pout. 

"Why do I need to know all of this? It's not like I will ever use it after school, right?"

Jared burst out laughing and wrapped his arms around Jensen, pulling the slender boy up on his lap, ignoring the pen falling down on the table.

"Jen, I use this every day, I really don't think you're asking the right person here."

"Chad!" Jensen called out then, loud enough for Jared to wince. "How often do you use the stupid math stuff they taught you at school?"

"Never!" Chad called back. "That's what they invented calculators for!"

Jensen looked back at Jared with a hopeful expression but Jared just shook his head and nodded towards the book in front of Jensen. 

"No, I promised to help you study and that's what I'll do," he adjusted Jensen to a better position on his lap but he had no plans to let the boy return to his own chair. "You need to know this."

"Fine!" Jensen scoffed and reached for the pen.

It was moments like that that made Jared remember the age difference between them, the times Jensen sulked and pouted. His lower lip jutted out in the prettiest of invitations and it stripped years from his age, making Jared think back to the first times he had spent with Jensen. 

"Some one's not focusing," he heard Jensen say.

He realized his distracting thoughts must have been quite obvious to the boy on his lap because Jared was already half hard, cock pressing against the rounded swell of Jensen's ass and for a moment he got some gorgeously vivid images of bending Jensen over the table. His thoughts were cut off by the chime of the doorbell, Jensen almost falling off his lap in his attempts to get to a more innocent looking position. Blood was pooling on Jensen's cheeks but when he looked over to Jared there was a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Jared heard Chad move to open the door and then some mumbled talking followed by a burst of laughter then the talking started up again, sounding more relaxed than it had the first time.

"Jay," he called out. "Do you have any plans for next Saturday?"

"No," Jared answered and with a smile he stood up to walk to the door to the hall, curious to see who Chad was talking to.

In the door way he saw their neighbor, Mr. Cayman, standing with a stack of fliers in his hand. Chad was holding one of the brightly colored slips of papers in his hand, grinning wide. From where Jared was standing he could only make out the word _Party_ with big, sprawly font, the rest of if hidden by Chad's hand but he didn't have time to ask before Chad grinned wide. 

"Block party!" the blond man exclaimed. "Food, silly games and beer!"

Jared thought about that for a while, it would be the first block party since he had inherited the house and he couldn't really see a reason for it _not_ to be awesome. 

"Yeah, we'll be there, of course we will," he said to Mr. Cayman.

"That's good news," the man said. "Care to supply the balloons for the water balloon game?"

Chad turned around so that Cayman couldn't see his face before he grinned at Jared, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

"Oh, we can do that, right Jay?" Chad said. "We can get balloons, all the kids should play, right?"

Jared heard a small shuffling in the kitchen behind him and he had no doubt that Jensen was standing right behind them, ready to tell Chad off for the "kid" thing. But all Jared could think of was having Jensen that close and not being able to touch the boy.

"Good," Mr. Cayman said, clearly not feeling the tension in the room. "See you both on Saturday then."

When the door closed behind him it only took a second for Jensen to come out into the hallway, glaring daggers at Chad.

"I'm not playing kids games so you can just forget about it," the boy protested.

Chad burst out laughing and Jared couldn't stop a grin from appearing at his own face at the offended look on Jensen's face. He wrapped one arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders, pulling the slender frame close and despite his pout Jensen wrapped both arms around Jared's waist.

"You'll be okay kid," Chad grinned. "Trust me, you _will_ be playing that game, not like you can argue with me in front of your parents."

"Does me being your boyfriend mean I have to be friends with Chad?" Jensen mumbled against Jared's chest.

Jared started laughing at that, he couldn't really put his finger on when things have shifted but somewhere over the months since Chad had found out he had formed some sort of friendship with the boy and even though he never had told either of the two how much it meant to him, he was very sure that they knew.

"Yeah," Jared smiled into Jensen's soft hair. "We're a package deal. And Jensen... Chad is right, you will play that silly game."

Both men laughed when Jensen groaned and hid his face against Jared's chest, but with Jensen pressed so close to him Jared could feel the boy shaking with silent laughter.

-¤-

Jared hated being so close to Jensen without the ability to touch, or even to talk to the boy more than the few polite words exchanged between the two of them when he and Chad arrived, bag full of balloons in hands. He could see Jensen at the other end of the yard, dressed in jeans and a green button-down that made him look just as hot as he did when dressed in his perfect little boyscout uniform.

"This gives us grown-up points, right?" Chad asked beside him and took a beer from the party cooler. "I mean, going to block parties and all. It's a grown up thing to do."

With a raised eyebrow Jared nodded towards the kids playing around and the teens loitering at the edges of the adult crowds.

"They don't count," Chad protested. "You know as well as I do they're only here because their parents demanded it of them."

A flash of green eyes made Jared smile before he turned to his friend to accept a beer of his own, bottle cold and slippery in his grasp.

"Well, we get grown-up points but at least we didn't... bring a pie or something," he said with a grin. 

"Well thank fuck for that," Chad laughed, clearly oblivious to the angry glares from parents that didn't approve of him cussing in front of their children. "There's a difference between helping and being totally lame after all."

"Two bachelors baking a pie? Did you two ever consider there's a reason you were in charge of getting the balloons?"

Jared and Chad turned around and saw Donna Ackles standing beside them with a smile on her face and her arms full of two huge bowls full of popcorn balls. Heat crept up Jared's cheek at the familiar smell of caramel popcorn that he was sure came from another boyscout popcorn sale. 

"One would think he would get bored of popcorn once he stopped selling himself, but apparently it's still my duty to buy enough to feed an army."

"Jensen can be very convincing," Chad agreed with a friendly smile that had Jared wanting to roll his eyes. His best friend could be a very good actor when he put his mind to it. "But I've noticed that popcorn is always a welcome treat at work so I'm okay with buying loads."

Donna smiled when Jared and Chad took the bowls to help her carry them to the long tables set out on the huge lawn shared by two houses, the only two in the block that weren't separated by fences.

"I'm happy you two decided to come," Donna said as they put the bowls down. "Such gentlemen, thank you. Will you come with me for some hamburgers? Alan will be living by the grill all evening, I'm sure of it."

He could feel Jensen's gaze on him when he followed Donna to the table but once the boy came to pick up his food he didn't linger. He just reached past Jared, slender arm brushing his, to get a plate before he returned to the group of teens he had been talking to. Jared watched him go until Chad elbowed him in the side and brought him back to the conversation at the Ackles table. 

"...of course a promotion is always nice," he heard Donna say. "But it does keep me away from home more. I'm just so happy that Jensen has the scouts to keep him busy, and your dogs, Jared. It's nice to know he has somewhere to go when we're not at home."

"The dogs love him," Jared assured her. "Sometimes I think they prefer him to me."

Donna brushed a dark blond strand of hair out of her face as she smiled towards Jared and for a moment he felt guilt curl heavy and hard in his belly.

"And you two don't mind him there when you get home? I know your work makes you work long hours at times, if it's too much to have a teenage boy around when you get home, let us know," Alan said and pushed a plate towards Jared. 

"Oh no, we don't mind, right Chad?" Jared said quickly, turning to his friend.

"Nah," Chad said easily. "The kid is smart for his age. Besides, we're used to him, would be weird to _not_ have him around by now. Plus it would break the dog's hearts, can't have that."

Jared was reminded of what a good friend Chad really was and despite the guilt inside of him battling with the longing to have Jensen close Jared found himself having a really nice time talking to the Ackles family.

-¤-

"Dude," Chad groaned happily. "These burgers are amazing, we should have block parties all the time."

Jared could only agree, he wasn't sure he could down any more food but he really was contemplating it, until he saw something that made all thoughts of food fade away in favor of heat raising inside him. Jensen was licking barbecue sauce off his slender fingers and Jared had a hard time tearing his gaze off the boy.

"You're drooling," Chad mumbled beside him.

Just then Jensen looked up and their eyes locked across the yard, a small smile played on his lips, a smile clearly meant for Jared alone. Then the boy looked away, returning to what ever discussion he was involved in with the other kids his age. 

"Time for games!" someone called out and Jared groaned, he could barely imagine standing up, much less playing games.

"Balloon game, c'mon," Chad grinned.

That was enough to make Jared get to his feet, letting himself get dragged off to where his neighbors were pushing people into two lines, facing each other across a few feet. It took a moment for him to realize that it wasn't only the kids lining up, but pretty much everyone else was getting ready to play as well.

"I thought this was a kids game," Chad said, taking a step back.

"Oh," a girl that Jared was pretty sure was Jensen's little sister said. "Jensen suggested everyone should play, it's much more fun like this. So now it's mandatory."

The look on Chad's face was rather priceless; jaw falling open, blue eyes going wide and he spun around to look for the boy in question. Jensen's smile was pure sugar, sweet and innocent in every way that Jared knew very well that the boy was not.

"You will play with us, won't you?" Jensen asked softly. "Everyone else will."

Jared had no doubt the boy had planned it from the second they had been teasing him about it and he really wished he could say something about it but he was aware of all the eyes on them.

"Of course we will," Jared answered, matching Jensen's sweet smile.

He found himself face to face with Jensen, the boy balancing a water balloon, shifting it from hand to hand. Suddenly a whistle blew and the water balloon was in the air, heading towards Jared and it was just old basketball reflexes that made Jared catching it without it breaking. Somewhere to his right he heard a splashing sound and low curses but he didn't really listen, instead he tossed the water filled balloon back to boy who caught it with graceful ease.

"Wow, this is such a hard game," Jared teased when Jensen tossed it back. "How ever will I manage?"  
A smirk played across Jensen's lips just before the whistle blew once more and someone called out for everyone to take a step back. The next time the balloon came through the air he barely had time to catch it it in time. A few more splashes sounded along the lines, followed by yelps and laughter but all Jared had eyes for was the boy smiling towards him.

The whistle blew a few more times, the distance between them stretching out as more and more people failed to catch their balloons, wet splashes eliminating them one by one. Jensen's smile grew each time, confidence growing with each catch but Jared really, _really_ , wanted to see Jensen wet.

"You're good at this," he said loud enough for Jensen to hear it but he doubted anyone else really listened to them. "Didn't know you were so good at catching."

He saw the second Jensen almost dropped the balloon, green eyes going slightly wide as the boy bit down on his lower lip but Jensen managed to keep it together enough to throw the balloon back to Jared.

"I'm good at a lot of things," Jensen answered, pink tongue flickering out to wet his lips.

That time it was Jared's turn to almost fumble the balloon but he managed to catch it without it breaking. Looking around he saw that it was only one other pair left, to his surprise he saw Chad catch his balloon without any problem and throw it across the increasing distance. 

"I'm sure you are," Jared said with a slow smile just as Chad made a loud whoop. "You sure are good at the stuff you do at my place."

Jensen's jaw fell open, frozen in shock, clearly not seeing the balloon that came flying through the air.

"Harley and Sadie love you after all."

The words were barely out of his mouth before the balloon caught the boy straight in the chest, drowning him in water and causing him to sputter. Chad was laughing so much he dropped the balloon he was holding, not that it mattered because all Jared focused on was his boyfriend's soaked figure.

"Cold," Jensen gasped. "Did they fill it with ice water?"

Jared laughed and walked over to the boy, stroking strands of wet hair from his face, cursing the fact that he couldn't do more than that when surrounded by their neighbors.

"Oh Jen," a female voice spoke out behind Jared. 

He turned around and smiled at Donna when she approached them, almost half running but still unable to hide the smile when she looked at her youngest son.

"I think you should go home and change, want me to take you home honey?" Donna fussed.

"Mom!" Jensen protested, cheeks turning red. "I'm fifteen, I can walk home to put on some new clothes by myself."

"Of course you can," Donna said and patted the boy's cheek. "Now where is your father? I didn't bring the keys, did you? No? Oh well, then we really need to find him before you catch a cold."

"I can take him to my place to dry him up," Jared offered. "It's closer and he usually leaves a set of spare clothes there in case the dogs mess him up."

Jared didn't tell her that the real fact her son had taken to leave clothes at Jared's place was because of all the times he had gotten come on his clothes. The heat in Jensen's quick gaze told him that Jensen remembered that little fact though, the blush on his cheeks deepening in color.

"Would you? Are you sure it's not a hassle?" Donna asked. "You're so nice to him. We are happy to have a nice man like you around. Is that okay with you, Jen?"

"Yeah, mom," Jensen said quickly. "Can I go now? I'm r-really c-cold."

Jared rolled his eyes behind Donna's back, he really thought shattering of teeth was a bit over the top but the woman seemed to accept it, letting Jensen go with Jared. The two of them remained silent as they left the big yard, talk and laughter fading away behind them. They hadn't come far though when Jared found his arms full of wet boy as Jensen pushed in close, sealing his lips to Jared in a deep kiss.

"Jesus fuck, Jensen," Jared groaned. "People aren't far away... we can't..."

Even to his own ears it sounded like a weak protest, even more so because Jensen's fingers were already at the waistline of Jared's jeans, slender fingers working the fly open. 

"No one will come," Jensen gasped. "The bushes will hides us. Just... let me..."

With those words the boy sank down to his knees, tugging Jared's jeans down enough to free his already hard cock and wrap his lips around the crown, slowly sliding down to take more and more of Jared's hard cock into his mouth. Jared moaned at the perfect warm heat surrounding his length, hands falling down to tangled in Jensen's hair, pushing the boy further down. He was amazed at the ease with which Jensen's throat opened to accept him, how truly talented Jensen had become from the first time he hesitantly wrapped his lips around Jared's cock. 

"Jen... what if someone comes..." Jared gasped but it really wasn't a concern for him, there was no way he could tear himself away from the boy on his knees before him.

Big eyes looked up to meet his and Jared couldn't tell if it was lust or the fall of dusk that made them look black but he could still read the love in them, and the ever present want. The boy didn't pull away to speak, but his soft tongue pressed against the underside of Jared's cock, sending wave after wave of pleasure through his body until he wasn't sure how he was still standing.

"Gonna come," he warned the boy. 

Jensen made no move to pull away, not that Jared had expecting him to. Instead the boy let one hand drift to brush over Jared's sac, a gentle touch that made his legs go weak as he shot down Jensen's throat. He could feel the boy swallowing down his release, moaning low around him as he sucked him through the release. Jensen didn't pull back until Jared started going soft in his mouth, then the boy leaned back and licked the last traces of come from his lips before getting up to his feet in a graceful move. Jared put his own clothes back in order before he pulled Jensen in close, slotting their lips together and tasting himself on Jensen's tongue, something that made his cock twitch with interest once more.

"Fucking hell," he mumbled against Jensen's lips.

He remembered when any curse would have Jensen blush and squirm, but three years with Jared, and in extension Chad, had effectively stopped that because now the boy just smiled proudly.

"Mr. Padalecki," Jensen said with his softest, most innocent voice. "I'm pretty sure you promised my mother to get me clean and dry, not dirty me up."

"I'm gonna show you dirty..." Jared growled and dragged the boy with him towards his own house.

-¤-  
-¤-

Stepping inside the warmth of Jared's home, Jensen realized how cold he really was. What had been a light breeze in the early evening really felt a lot colder when he was drenched in water. Still, the blow job had been amazing. Jensen knew that maybe he shouldn't be getting off on the chance of people catching them, but he always had liked that edge of danger. He also loved the feel of Jared's heavy cock on his tongue and really, he hadn't had patience enough to wait until they got inside. But now that he was inside he really wanted to get warm again.

"Go get into the shower," Jared said with a pat to Jensen's ass. "You're shivering."

Jensen had really thought of other ways for Jared to warm him up but he couldn't deny that a warm shower sounded like a dream so with a nod he started stripping out of his wet clothes while Jared went to fetch him soft towels and a dry set of clothes.

The warm water felt like heaven when he stepped in under the spray, it quickly made him feel warm again when the heat of it seemed to seep through his skin and he tilted his head back, welcoming the warm water against his face. Jared's shower had the perfect pressure and Jensen loved standing under the firm spray of water, closing his eyes and just letting it wash over his face. He thought back to the party, wondering if anyone had noticed the way he couldn't really keep his eyes off Jared no matter how much he tried. Too lost in his own mind he didn't hear the shower door opening behind him, not aware of Jared's presence until his boyfriend wrapped strong arms around his waist, causing Jensen to yelp in surprise, swallowing a mouthful of warm water.

"I didn't expect you to join me," he smiled when his heart was back in his chest.

"You think I can stay away when I know you're naked and wet so close to me?" Jared asked and pressed his lips against Jensen's neck. "You drove me crazy tonight, Jen. Wanted to touch you, to kiss you."

Jensen shivered under Jared's tender touches, kisses of worship pressed into his skin as he arched back into the stronger man, needing the closeness he had been craving all day. Big hands stroked over his hips down over the curve of his ass and Jensen leaned forward, bracing himself against the wall, offering himself to Jared. He heard a low groan behind him before Jared got to his knees and Jensen found himself spread open by big hands, a warm tongue licking a stripe over his exposed hole. Jensen had been hard since the second he had dropped to his knees for Jared, but feeling Jared licking him so intimately had pleasure rising even higher and he pushed back in a silent plea for more.

"No no," Jared laughed behind him. "I want to hear you beg for it."

Jensen rested his forehead against the hard tiles but when Jared pressed kisses all around his hole without actually putting his tongue where Jensen so desperately wanted it the words just fell from his lips.

"Please Jared," he gasped. "Want you... please, your tongue... _please_..."

"Say it baby," Jared mumbled, dragging his tongue down Jensen's crack bit stopping before he reached the right spot.

"Tease," Jensen whined. "Your tongue inside me... please... want you to lick me open."

What ever more words he had been about to use they drowned out on a moan when Jared's tongue circled his rim. The warm pressure was pure perfection, strong tongue pushing against him until Jensen could feel his own body open up to Jared, inviting him in.

"So good," he whimpered. "I can't... Jay... more..."

Jared's hands covered the rounded swell of his ass, spreading him wider to allow his tongue to push even deeper inside of Jensen, swirling like he wanted to taste every part of him. When Jared hummed low it sent vibrations up through Jensen's body and the boy didn't know if he wanted Jensen's tongue inside of him forever or if he should be pleading for the man to fuck him. 

"Love licking you open," Jared mumbled, licking over the tight rim. "And you love it as well, don't you? My tongue in your sweet ass."

"Love it... so much..." Jensen gasped and his fingers slid over the wet tiles in his attempts to find something to hold on to. 

A sharp sting shot through him when Jared bit down on the round swell of Jensen's ass, pain mingled together with the sweetest pleasure.

"Wish I could do this for hours, wanna see if you can come from this alone, just my tongue on you, inside you," Jared groaned and pressed an open mouthed kiss to Jensen's hole. "But right now, I need to be inside you again."

He licked a long stripe all the way from Jensen's ass and up his spine, tilting his head to the side until their lips could meet in a slightly awkward but heated kiss. The click of a lid sounded over the rush of water and Jared didn't give him enough time to catch his breath before two slicked fingers were pushed deep inside, making him moan and tremble. 

"I should... more prep..." Jared groaned and Jensen could feel the hard line of Jared's cock pressing against his back.

"No, I can take it. Please, I want you inside me. Right now."

"Jen... I don't wanna hurt..."

"You wont hurt me," he protested. "I want you to fuck me, please, take me. Make me yours."

The response was instant; Jared's hips snapping forward to slide his cock all way into Jensen with one quick thrust that had Jensen seeing stars, cheek resting against the tiles in front of him.

"More, more, more," he chanted in a breathless plea.

Jared's big hands was locked hard around his hips, holding him in place while the man behind him fucked him with deep, slow thrusts. The water was still pouring down over the two of them and Jensen felt each drop hitting his skin like it was the softest caress, intensifying the feel of Jared behind him, inside him. His boyfriend was a big, solid presence behind him, big hands the only thing that kept Jensen standing. 

"Wish I could have you like this all the time," Jared moaned. "So perfectly stretched around me, right where you belong."

"Yes, want you all the time," Jensen moaned. "Love you, love you inside of me..."

"And why do you love it?" Jared asked, hips stilling with his cock barely inside Jensen. "Tell me, why do you love it when I do this to you? My cock inside you..."

"God, 'cause it feels good..." Jensen said on a shivering moan. "And... oh... oh... because it makes me feel like I'm yours."

"Oh you are," Jared said. He slid one hand up to cover Jensen's throat, tilting his head back in a move that made Jensen's body arch back and Jared's cock pressed hard against his prostate. "You're _mine_!"

The last word was a low growl and followed by a hard snap of hips as Jared went from the slow almost teasing slide in and out to fucking Jensen so hard all the air was pushed out of his lungs. Each thrust of Jared's cock into Jensen had his own dick pressing against the hard tiles but he didn't really feel it, not aware of anything but the feel of Jared inside of him. 

"Mine," Jared whispered into his ear. "So fucking perfect, and all mine. Only I get to see you like this."

"Yours, yes, only yours."

Jared's hand on his throat tightened in a possessive action that had Jensen crying out when his orgasm tore through him, sparks of blinding pleasure that had him clenching down hard around Jared's hard cock and pulling the other man with him over the edge. He felt Jared throb inside him, pulsing out wet and warm and Jensen was pretty sure he screamed in pleasure but it was nothing he could hear above the rush of blood in his ears and Jared's voice mumbling heated words of _mine_ and _perfect_ and _love you_.

-¤-

"We should go back or your parents will think I've kidnapped you," Jared said but made no move to get up from the couch where they were spread out, Jared on his back and Jensen splayed out on top of him.

"No," Jensen mumbled lazily. "I texted mom and said I was tired from the scout meeting, I asked if it was okay if I slept in your guest room so they could stay at the party."

"You did?"

The surprise in Jared's voice was clear and Jensen tensed up, realizing that maybe he should have asked first, he didn't even know if maybe Jared would prefer to return to the party rather than spend time with a kid now the sex was done. He was moving to pull away when Jared's arms wrapped around his waist, holding him in place.

"Hey, where do you think you're going?" Jared asked. 

"I'm sorry, I should've asked before. I shouldn't just assume that... I can go to the party, fetch a key from my..."

The words where silenced by Jared's lips covering his own and one big hand came up to cup the back of his head, holding him still while Jared peppered his face with soft kisses that made Jensen feel loved, worshiped and adored. 

"You're always welcome here, Jen," his boyfriend promised. "All I could think of at the party was you, being close to you."

"That's why you let me suck you like that?" Jensen asked without looking up to meet Jared's eyes.

Suddenly he found himself moved, strong arms keeping him from falling to the floor when Jared moved to sit up. He was pulled onto Jared's lap, the man holding him at a distance so that Jensen had no choice but to meet Jared's gaze.

"Jen, when I say close I don't mean sex," Jared said. "Not that I don't love having sex with you but by now you must know that's not all there is to this."

And Jensen _did_ know, he knew that Jared loved him but the hours at the party had stirred a new longing inside of him, one he knew he would never get to fulfill. All the boys had been talking dates and girlfriends but when they turned to Jensen he had nothing to say, no stories to tell them and it had hurt more than he wanted to admit even to himself. 

"I know," Jensen said and let his arms wrap around Jared's neck. "It's just that... tonight... it..."

He searched for words but he didn't know how to sum up all the thoughts whirling in his mind. It seemed like Jared understood though because he pressed another soft kiss to Jensen's lips. 

"It made it obvious how hard things can be," Jared said. "I talked to your _parents_ all evening, and I know they like me but somehow I think they wouldn't like me at all if they ever found out about us. And yeah, it sucked. I just wanted to pull you close, have you on my lap and in my arms when I told them that their son is amazing, and that I love him."

The words sent warmth through Jensen and he was sure his heart was actually swelling in his chest when he read the love on Jared's features. 

"The other kids," Jensen said quietly. "All they talked about was... dating. I've never been to a date, I had nothing to say when they turned to me."

"I'm sorry," Jared whispered, brush of air against Jensen's lips. "I wish I could give you all of that, I know that things would be easier if you were with someone your own age."

Jensen tangled his fingers in the soft hair at Jared's neck, holding his boyfriend still when he pressed forward into a lingering kiss. 

"I just want you," Jensen smiled. "It just sucked to not be able to brag about my fantastic boyfriend. I just... I don't want to hold you back. I'm just a kid and..."

"You're not _just_ anything," Jared interrupted. "You're mine, and I love you. I want you here, in my house and in my arms, telling me about your scout meetings..."

"That was rather dull this week."

"...and letting me help with homework. Do I hope we can go public one day? Of course I do, but it's not time yet," Jared went on. "But until then, how about I take my boyfriend to bed since his brilliant scheme means we'll have all night together?"

Jensen slid off Jared's lap and put his much smaller hand into Jared's big one as the man walked the two of them to the stairs. The steps creaked under Jensen's bare feet and it was a familiar sound, he knew the sound of each step that lead down to the part of the house that Jensen considered to be his second home. Jared flipped off the lights as they went, leaving the house dark and silent behind them. Jensen knew he was smiling by the time they reached Jared's bedroom, it wasn't often they go to spend the night together after all. Actually, Jensen thought he could count the time on the fingers on one hand and even then he usually had to sneak home in the morning to makes sure no neighbor noticed. This time he had an excuse and he looked forward to falling asleep in Jared's bed, to waking up at his side in the morning. 

He was sure Jared felt the same because once they stood beside the bed Jared turned to slowly undress Jensen, gentle touches and caresses until Jensen was spread out on the bed in just a pair of boxers and Jared quickly removed his own clothes as well and pulled the comforter over them before he wrapped Jensen in his arms. Jensen smiled happily, pushing himself close to Jared and the man leaned in for a soft kiss. 

"Sweet dreams, Jen," he mumbled.

"Night," Jensen yawned before he turned to his side, pushed up against Jared who pulled Jensen in until they were back to chest. "Love you."

Their bodies fit together so well, Jared's big body curled around Jensen's much smaller one and Jensen felt safe there. He decided that for the night he would forget everything about the world outside, ignore that it didn't approve, and just let himself be with Jared.

-¤-


	6. The First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things seem to be going their way for once and Jared and Jensen find themselves with some much longed for alone time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 15, Jared 26)

-¤-

Jensen didn't really listen to anything his friends were saying, their chatter was nothing more than background noise to his own thoughts. He was pretty sure none of them were actually speaking _to_ him though, and that none of them expected him to be an active part in the discussions bouncing around the table. It wasn't until Chris elbowed him in the side that he abandoned his own head space and tried to focus at least a little on his friends.

"Who are you taking?" Lindsey asked, looking straight at Jensen.

With a quick glance to the side he saw Jake mouthing _dance_ at him and his belly did a weird little flip at the thought of the upcoming event.

"Don't think I'm going," Jensen muttered quietly.

The table suddenly went all silent and Jensen felt their gazes heavy on him.

"You're not going?" Lindsey asked. "But the theme is Fire and Ice, of course you have to come."

"Katie has been holding out for you to ask her," Jake pointed out.

Of course she had, Katie had been trying to get Jensen to ask her out for months and he wasn't really surprised to find out she was almost expecting him to ask her. Boyscout and girlscout might be the nerdier version of cheerleader and quarter back. It was also something he wasn't interested in at all. But he couldn't say anything, could only try to sit silent and dodge all questions. Something that clearly didn’t work.

"I don't think we'll be home then," Jensen said with a shrug. "It's mom's and dad's anniversary, they will probably go away and make me stay with some relative or something."

"That sucks," Alona said with a sigh. "We should be going together, all of us. But maybe you can ask Katie to the movies instead? You two would look hot together."

Jensen thought that his everyday life would be so much easier if people didn't insist on trying to push him and Katie together all the time but it did seem like even his closest friends thought the two of them would be a good couple.

"I'm not gonna ask Katie out," he said through gritted teeth. 

"Why not?" Jake asked loud enough to even make Chris look up from where he had been shuffling through a stack of sheet music. "You never ask _anyone_ out."

Not even bothering with his tray of half eaten food Jensen stood up fast enough for the table to shake but he didn't even care about it, instead he grabbed his bag from where it had been resting against his chair. He was several steps away from the table before he stopped and turned around to his friends.

"Look, can you just let it go? I said no. I don't want match making, I'm not into Katie, okay?"

He was out of the cafeteria before anyone could even answer him, quick steps carrying away without him really noticing where he was walking until he looked up and realized he was several blocks away from the school building. He froze in place then, hesitant if he should go back or keep on walking, clearly his sub-conscious had been about to walk him home because the street he found himself on was very familiar. Only, he didn't think he had been heading home, he had been heading to Jared. 

"Jensen!"

Jensen spun around to see Chris come half-running down the road towards him, brown hair falling down into his eyes when he skidded to a stop in front of Jensen.

"Are you following me?" Jensen asked, silently thanking his lucky star that Chris hadn't caught up to him later.

"Of course," Chris said without a hint of guilt. "You took off, _someone_ had to find out what that was all about after all, apparently I'm someone."

Deep inside Jensen was happy his friends cared, they just had a really bad timing to care because he knew there was no way for him to fully explain the scene in the cafeteria. But he also knew that once Chris got an idea in his mind there was no way he would let it go. 

"Look Chris," Jensen sighed."I really don't wanna talk about it."

"So let me talk," Chris said, fixing his blue eyes on Jensen. "Let's start with the fact that you refuse to date anyone, you avoid all our questions about date nights and..."

"Chris," Jensen said in a warning tone.

"... you sometimes have these marks on your neck that I'm sure are barely there hickeys."

Jensen could feel all the blood drain from his face at the other boy's words. He always forgot that his quiet friend could be very perceptive at times even though it didn't seem it at first glance. Clearly he had caught all the small hints that their other friends so easily had missed.

"So, who is she?" Chris asked.

"There's no girl."

The words came on reflex but Jensen should have known that his friend wouldn't let it go quite so easily but it wasn't until Chris spoke again that he realized his mistake.

"No girl, eh?" Chris said. "So, who is he?"

There were loads of possible ways to go, so many excuses that could fall off his tongue if he focused but focusing in itself didn't seem to be an option because all Jensen could do was stare at his friend, mouth hanging open in shock as panic seemed to tug at the edges of his mind. Silence stretched out between them, thick and heavy and for each second that passed Jensen felt like it got harder and harder to come up with anything to say that wouldn't sound like the weakest excuse ever. In the end, Chris was the one to break the silence.

"Right, not talking about that then, okay," he said with a surprisingly soft tone. "If you ever wanna... talk about it, let me know, yeah? I'll just tell the teachers you threw up and went home."

The other boy had turned around and walked several steps when Jensen pulled in a deep breath in an attempt to gather his mind. For years he had never told anyone, had locked it all deep inside and thrown away the key, and yet something made him speak out before his friend got out of hearing range. 

"His name is Jared."

Chris froze in place, line of his spine ramrod straight and for the longest time he didn't turn around, just stood still, the only sound was that of chirping birds and a car door slamming somewhere in the distance. When Chris turned around it was with slow, precise movements but his face was blank, unreadable.

"Jared?" Chris asked in a too calm tone. "As in the Jared who's dogs you've been walking for three years?"

Jensen bit down so hard on his lower lip that pain flashed out but he still nodded ever so slightly. 

"Jesus fucking Christ, Jensen!" Chris almost exploded and the next moment he was too close, pushing into Jensen's personal space and jabbing a finger hard against Jensen's chest. "The same Jared who's what... twenty five?"

"Twenty six, actually," Jensen mumbled quietly, not daring to meet his friend's gaze.

Once more the silence lay heavy between them, making Jensen regret that he ever opened his mouth. Not having anyone to talk to was preferred to having your friends not talk to you at all. 

"Why?"

The question took Jensen by surprise, he had been expecting screaming and cussing, not for his friend to ask the one question he could so easily explain. He looked up, gaze locking with Chris's for a moment before Jensen let all his emotions show on his face.

"Because I love him."

They weren’t hard words to speak, instead they flowed from his tongue as easy as breathing and Jensen felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. No matter what happened next, he wasn't alone with the knowledge anymore 

"Jensen," Chris said hesitantly, like he expected Jensen to blow up any second. "How long has this been going on?"

"Please," Jensen asked and closed his eyes. He pulled down a deep breath, trying all he could to calm his own nerves. "Don't ask that."

"Because I wont like the answer?" 

Chris took a step back from Jensen but his posture was somewhat more relaxed and a glimmer of hope flared up inside of Jensen when the other boy smiled ever so slightly. 

"I'll... fuck, I guess I'll make the others leave you alone somehow," Chris said.

"You're not freaked out?" Jensen asked quietly. "You... won't tell?"

Suddenly Chris started laughing, a deep rumbling sound that filled the air and made a few birds flutter out of the bushes lining the sidewalk. Jensen raised an eyebrow, waiting for his friend to regain some sort of composure but it was several long minutes before the brown haired boy calmed down. 

"Freaked out? I'm not even sure I'm surprised," Chris said with a grin. "I _knew_ there was something more hiding behind that pristine scout uniform of yours."

Tension seeped away, leaving Jensen almost sagging to the ground in relief and he found himself smiling wide at his friend. 

"So, no winter formal for you?" Chris said. "I guess it would be weird for you if you can't go with your... uhm..."

"Boyfriend," Jensen filled in, not able to hold back his proud smile. "He's my boyfriend."

-¤-

With his head resting on Harley's flank and Sadie's warm body pressed up against his thigh Jensen felt warm and safe where he lay sprawled out in front of the wide screen, both dogs exhausted from playing out in the crisp winter air while Jensen waited for Jared to come home. A small smile was still on his lips when he thought about the discussion with Chris, and how his friend had been more supportive than Jensen could ever have imagined. It wasn't until he heard a car pull up in the drive way that he realized that he really needed to talk to Jared, that the man deserved to know that Jensen had told someone about their relationship.

The dogs were too tired to get up, instead they woofed lazily when the front door opened and Jared stepped inside, letting in a gush of cold air that had Jensen shivering. 

"Jen?" Jared said with a surprised tone as he stepped into the living room. "Shouldn't you be in school?"

Jensen shifted slightly, causing Harley to huff in protest before the big dog got up and padded away to the dog bed in the corner, closely followed by Sadie who never seemed to like to be too far away from her brother.

"Yeah," Jensen said and pushed up from the floor. "It's just´t..."

He didn't know what to say, but he was pretty sure that the next words out of mouth weren't the right ones. 

"Chris knows about us."

-¤-  
-¤-

A sea of possible scenarios welled up inside Jared at the unexpected words, none of those scenarios were pretty to look at considering they all ended with him somehow losing Jensen and that was not a possibility that the he would okay with.

"You told him?" Jared asked and it wasn't until the words came out, quick and hard like a whip lash, that he realized his mistake. 

Jensen took a quick step back, flash of hurt in his green eyes for just a moment before he closed himself off from Jared. Sadie and Harley curled up around each other even closer than before and Jared couldn't help but think that it looked like they were trying to hide. 

"I'm sorry," Jensen mumbled quietly. "But... Jared, I promise he wont tell anyone. I just... it's been three years. I needed someone to talk."

It hit Jared for the first time how utterly alone Jensen must have felt over their years together, even more so since Jared himself at least had Chad to turn to nowadays. Sometimes he forgot that Jensen was still a kid, the boy could seem so much older at times but standing in front of Jared now, shoulders haunched and gaze lowered he didn't even look fifteen, and he looked sad. 

"Jensen," Jared said and waited for the boy to look up to meet his gaze. "I trust you. If you say he wont tell, I trust you."

The smile on Jensen's lips was small and hesitant at first but when Jared took a step towards the boy with a smile on his own lips, Jensen's smile turned brilliant and Jared found himself with his arms full of a warm, slender body.

"I thought you were mad," Jensen said against Jared's chest. "I'm sorry but... I needed someone. And at least now he can be on my side when the others are nagging me about dates."

Jared's whole body tensed up and he managed to get enough distance between him and Jensen to look the boy in the eyes once more.

"Dates?" he asked, feeling irritation prickle under his skin. 

Jensen shuffled slightly but Jared locked his arms around the boy's waist to keep him in place and he pressed one soothing kiss to the boys temple.

"There's this dance coming up," Jensen said softly. "People are expecting me to ask this girl to go to the dance..."

"And you don't want to?" Jared asked.

Big green eyes met him, confusion written clear as day on the boy's face.

"What? No, of course not!" Jensen said quickly. "Do you... do you want me to?"

Jared's heart ached with the insecurity that was sometimes visible in his boyfriend, he had a hard time putting it together with the confident boy who could so easily slide down on his knees, making Jared's brain forget anything that wasn't about Jensen and _yesneednow_. 

"Do I want you to go on dates with other people?" Jared asked. "No, I hate the thought of that. But I see why it could make things easier for you. And it's high school, you should want to go to all these events. You only go to high school once, I don't..."

A small hand came up to cover Jared's mouth, interrupting the flow of words.

"I prefer having you over stupid dates," Jensen said simply.

Jared kissed the hand covering his mouth, causing his boyfriend to blush slightly before moving his hands to push into Jared's hair in a gesture that felt intimate and very grounding. 

"I would if I could," Jared said and brushed their lips together.

"Would what?" Jensen asked.

"Take you on a date," Jared explained. "I hope one day we'll be able to, somehow."

"I'd like that," his boyfriend said with a soft smile. "But I know what I am, I know being with me is hard."

Jared pulled the boy even closer as he sat down on the couch, Jensen firmly placed on his lap and he kissed the boy slow and deep until Jensen was gasping, warm puffs of air against Jared's lips. Sometimes Jared had doubts about his relationship with Jensen, but at moments like that, with Jensen such a perfect weight against his body, there were no doubts in his mind.

"It's worth it," he assured the boy.

-¤-

Jared came out of the shower and almost dropped his towel when Chad tossed him the phone, damp hands almost dropping it to the floor before he got a firmer grip.

"It's Jensen, he seems pretty damn eager to talk to you since he's called _five_ times while you were in the shower," Chad said loud enough for the boy on the other end of the line to hear it. 

"...being an ass, Chad, and just give him the damn..." 

Jared smiled when he heard the voice coming from the phone as he put it to his ear.

"It's me now," he cut the boy off.

"Finally!" Jensen exclaimed in a way that was very unusual for the otherwise calm boy. "About time, I thought you were gonna stay there all day."

Jared laughed, he was pretty sure that he hadn't been in the shower for more than fifteen minutes but Jensen sounded really winded up so Jared choose to not say anything about it.

"Look, my parents will call you soon," Jensen said and that made Jared's breath catch in his throat. 

"What?" he croaked out, clearly distraught enough to make Chad poke his head out of the kitchen with a raised eyebrow. "Your parents? What the fuck, Jen?"

"Oh no. No, no, no," Jensen said quickly. "It's nothing bad, I promise. I think it's good, well... I hope you think it's good as well. But I don't know... I just... "

Jensen was _eager_ about something. The realization hit Jared suddenly and it made his frown melt away and turn into a smile. Chad still looked curious though but he shrugged and returned to the pot of chili he was working on. But Jared had no doubt there would come questions.

"You know the winter formal thing?" Jensen said and went on without waiting for an answer. "That weekend is my parents anniversary so they are going away. I kinda told the guys at school I would be staying with a relative then, that's why I couldn't do the dance."

"Okay," Jared said as he walked down the stairs to his own room, curious to see where the discussion was heading. 

"But I told mom and dad that I didn't know if you'd be able to be without someone checking up Harley and Sadie."

Jared threw his damp towel over the back of a chair, rummaging for clothes.

"I think they would be okay you know, Chad can always..."

"No, he can't. Tell them he can't," Jensen said breathlessly. 

"What?" Jared asked, phone pressed against his shoulder when he had to use both hands to pull a pair of boxers on.

"They're gonna ask if I can stay with you."

Jared dropped the phone in surprise, staring at the small device where it lay on the floor and it took a few long moments before he gathered himself together enough to pick it up again. 

"Jared? Hello? Jay?"

"Shit, sorry," Jared said quickly to reassure the boy. "I dropped the phone. They want you to stay with me?"

"Yeah, I think... oh, they're back. I need to hang up. Please, say yes? They'll call you soon."

The phone went dead in his hand and Jared dropped it to his bed. He put on the rest of his clothes without really being aware of what was happening, too stunned with what his boyfriend had told him and it wasn't until he was halfway up the stairs, phone once more in hand, that it all connected in his mind. Jensen, staying with him for an entire weekend. Jensen in his bed two nights, body pressed up against him. The phone started ringing before he reached the top of the stairs and when Jared answered he was grinning wide.

-¤-

"I have an idea," Chad said a few days later while they were sprawled out on the couch, watching some rather brainless sit-com.

"Miracles do happen," Jared deadpanned easily. 

Chad turned around to glare at him but there was still a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"You should be nice to me when I'm about to help you get laid," his friend said with a grin. 

Jared burst out laughing at that even though he didn't really know why he was even surprised by the stuff his friend said anymore. He reached for the beer standing on the table in front of them and propped his feet up against the table before he asked.

"Okay, what is this idea of yours?"

"You know the cabin my family got up at the lake?" Chad asked.

Of course Jared knew, they had spent several weekends at the cabin that the rest of Chad's family seemed to have forgotten all about. It was surprisingly cosy, big windows opening out to a perfect view of the lake and a big fireplace to keep the place warm. The only letdown was that the place only had one bedroom with a huge bed and the sleeping choices were either share a bed, or one of them had to sleep on the couch. 

"Yeah, of course I know of it," Jared answered.

"Take Jensen there."

Blinking a few times Jared just looked at his friend in silence while the suggestion settled in.

"When?"

"This weekend. His parents will let him stay here anyway, and I can take care of Harley and Sadie after all, even if they obviously think I work too much. Nice little lie there by the way," Chad laughed.

An image flickered through Jared's mind then; Jensen splayed out naked in front of the fireplace, pale skin turned golden in the flickering light from the fire and he knew that he needed that to happen.

"Think he'd like it?" Jared asked. "I don't want to..."

"Jay," Chad interrupted. "See it as a date. You wanted to give him one, right?"

Jared was smiling so wide it hurt at the thought of it being only him and Jensen for the first time. The two of them and no chance for anyone to disturb them, no curfews to abide by. For the first time in over three years he could give Jensen just what the boy deserved.

"Chad," he said, voice thick with emotion. "Thank you, for thinking of this. For thinking of him."

"You know," Chad said without looking at Jared. "I know you love him, and honestly? The kid is awesome, I really like him."

Jared was pretty damn sure that was a discussion neither of them would ever mentioned again so all he did was grab Chad's shoulder for just a moment before he went into the kitchen for more beer.

-¤-

"Where are we going?" Jensen asked for what must be the tenth time. 

"I'm not telling,"Jared said once more, smiling at the boy in the passenger seat

Jensen glared at him but his giddy excitement had barely been concealed since Jared loaded their bags into the trunk and pushed the boy into the seat without any real explanation. The city was already well behind them, trees stretching out on either side of the road, ground powdered with a soft layer of snow. He hadn't seen another car for close to thirty minutes, not many others heading out to the world of cabins and frozen woods and that fit Jared just fine. Slowly he reached out one hand to grasp Jensen's, tangling their hands together. The motion made Jensen look over at him, gaze turning soft when the boy smiled and shifted slightly to be facing Jared more than the road ahead of them. 

"What about Harley and Sadie?" Jensen asked just when Jared turned onto the narrow gravel road that lead up to the cabin. 

"Chad will take care of them," Jared explained. "This was his suggestion."

"What was his..."

The words seemed to die on the boy's tongue when they turned the last bend and the cabin lay in front of them, lake visible on the other side. Jared smiled at the look on Jensen's face; plush lips parted in a surprised gasp and green eyes wide with wonder. Looking outside Jared understood the boy because the cabin and the surrounding landscape painted a serene picture, soft white dusting and deep blue water that reflected the overhead clouds.

"Jared," Jensen gasped. "Is this a.... is this his..."

"It belongs to Chad's family, but he's the only one ever using it. And right now? Right now it's ours for the weekend."

Jensen practically exploded out of the car, eyes dancing with joy and he was halfway up the steps to the small porch before he froze in place. 

"Jen?" Jared said and heaved their bags out of the car before walking up to his boyfriend.

"Ours?" Jensen asked softly as he turned around to face Jared. "You mean, just you and me? Like a mini vacation... or a weekend date or... something like that?"

Dropping the bags on the top step Jared stepped close enough to Jensen to rest his hands on the boy's hips.

"That's exactly what I mean," he said with a nod. 

Jensen blushed all the way from the roots of his soft hair and down his neck. Every part of Jared wanted to strip the boy out of his clothes to explore each inch of blood warm skin but first he wanted to show Jensen the place that was theirs. 

"It's freezing here," Jensen whined when they grabbed their bags and went inside. 

Jared laughed at the boy’s slight pout, earning himself a glare from Jensen.

"How about you get a fire going then? It's the scout thing to do, right?" Jared smiled. "I'll go put this away in the bedroom."

He wasn't surprised to find Jensen kneeling beside the fireplace when he got back, matches in hand and a perfect little pile of wood slowly getting consumed by the first licks of fire. 

"I think it'll be warm soon," Jensen said as he held out his hands towards the small source of heat.

-¤-

"I'm happy they had a generator for cooking," Jensen mumbled later when they collapsed on the couch, bellies heavy with food. "I might be a scout but cooking over an open fire is annoying."

"Mmhhm..." Jared said and tried to not think too much of the fact that Jensen was laying mostly on top of him. 

They both drifted into silence for awhile, fingers stroking tenderly over sensitive skin while they watched the crackling fire. Jared felt his eyelids starting to go heavy and he was pondering suggesting to get some sleep when Jensen shifted on top of him, a small motion that made their crotches rub together.

"Oh," Jensen gasped.

Jared thought it was the fastest he had ever gone from half asleep to half-hard but he didn't think he could be blamed when he had Jensen above him, the boy's sweet smell all around him and the sweetest moans spilling from his lips when Jared rolled his hips up.

"God, so good," Jensen gasped. "Can we? Right here?"

For the first time Jared knew that there was no risk of getting caught, no friends coming home too early, no parents or neighbors knocking on the door. Just him and Jensen and the weekend stretching out in front of them. 

"Not here," he said, causing Jensen to look a bit puzzled. "I want you... like this..."

He grabbed the blanket that was draped over the back of the couch and then he rolled the both of them down on the floor. Jensen watched him as he spread the blanket out in front of the fireplace, close enough for the heat to push against him but not close enough for it to be uncomfortable. 

"You," he said with a smile. "Naked, now!"

Jensen's eyes flew wide but he obeyed within seconds, soft sweater coming off to reveal a thin t-shirt beneath and then jeans were pushed off slender hips until Jensen was naked in front of him. It was a sight Jared was sure he would never be bored of, because Jensen just got more and more beautiful each day Jared knew him. 

"On the blanket," Jared ordered and Jensen nodded, slowly laying down on his back without taking his gaze off Jared.

The boy's gaze turned heated when Jared started stripping himself bare, and he couldn't stop himself from doing it deliberately slow, showing off for his boyfriend and by the time he stood naked beside the blanket, Jensen's cock was hard, beads of pre-come glistening in the light from the fire.

"I wanna taste you," Jared said and Jensen let his legs fall apart right away. "No, not like that. I wanna lick you open."

"Oh god," Jensen gasped but he quickly moved until he lay on his belly on the soft blanket, legs parted and ass slightly raised. "Want you to..."

Jensen was sin personified, Jared was sure of that as he took in the view in front of him, the perfect curve of Jensen's spine and the soft swell of his ass. Jared couldn't believe how he could ever have thought he could be without Jensen, not when he had his perfect boyfriend splayed out like an offering in front of him. He leaned down to press a kiss against the dip of Jensen's spine before continuing to press soft kisses over the rounded ass. Jensen was trembling beneath him, each tender touch causing soft, freckled skin to pebble and Jared thought he would never have enough of this, enough of _Jensen_.

"Want me to what?" he asked teasingly, pressing a kiss just to the top of Jensen's ass.

"Your tongue, please," Jensen gasped and tried to get up on all fours.

For a moment Jared did consider holding the boy still, forcing him to lay down, but having him on all fours would give Jared better access to where he wanted to be so he grabbed Jensen's hips with a firm grasp, almost lifting the boy up. The new position gave him a perfect view of Jensen's ass, pink little muscle like an invitation. He pressed his lips against the end of Jensen's spine once more, but then he let his hands grab the boy's ass cheeks, spreading him open for Jared's finger and tongue. He wanted that little hole, wanted it fluttering around his tongue, but first of all he wanted to make Jensen _beg_ for it. 

Carefully he blew a breath against the soft skin, smiling when Jensen trembled at the sensation. He loved how sensitive Jensen was, the way the boy moaned and shivered under his administrations, body curving up to plead for more. But as fun as it was to tease Jensen, truth was that Jared wanted it as much as the boy in front of him and he could only take so much. With a low hum he leaned down to press his tongue against the sensitive spot just behind the boy's heavy sac and then he licked a slow stripe up the crack, pausing to swirl his tongue over the hole for just a second.

"Jay," Jensen gasped, arms giving out and the boy rested his forehead against his own folded arms, muffling small moans into the blanket. 

"I wanna hear you," Jared pointed out and licked over the small hole once more. "Wanna know that you like this, that you want my tongue."

" _Please_ ," Jensen keened softly. "Want you, your tongue.. please, lick me open for you. Want you to. Your tongue in my ass, please Jared."

Hearing the dirty words falling from Jensen's perfect lips did amazing things for Jared's libido, his cock hard and his balls heavy already. He focused the swirls of his tongue on the little opening, licking without pushing inside until the skin was glistening wet and Jensen was begging desperately. 

"Oh oh... Jay, need to... please... don't tease, want you," the boy whimpered. " _Need_ you."

Jared pushed his tongue inside then, one hard thrust into Jensen's willing body and he felt the muscle clench around his tongue when Jensen pushed back against him. 

"Fuck," Jensen whimpered weakly. 

Tasting Jensen was wonderful, the way the boy's whole body seemed to tremble and the low sounds that fell from the boy's lips with each push of Jared's tongue. He loved rimming Jensen, loved pushing his tongue as deep as possible and then hold still for a few long moments before pulling back out, tongue catching on the rim. Slowly Jensen started to relax around him, muscles working and almost pulling his tongue back in and the boy rolled his hips back each time Jared started pulling out. 

Jensen almost fell forward when Jared let one hand drift down to stroke over the boy's silky smooth sac, cupping his balls in one big hand and his low moans turned into a low keening sound, all need and desperate want. Jared let his mouth seal tight over the rim, sucking at it at the same time as he pushed his tongue in deep, fingers brushing over smooth balls.

"Jesus fuck," Jensen gasped. "Jay... gonna... gonna..."

"No, you wont," Jared said with another lick to the boy''s perfect hole. "Not yet."

"What? No, don't stop, please," Jensen whined. "Please... please..."

Jared smiled and withdrew his hand, edging his boyfriend back from the edge as he stroked his fingers over the spit slick rim, skin pink and glistening. 

"What do you want the most, my tongue in you or my cock up your ass?" Jared asked, leaning in to let just the tip of his tongue circle feather light over the rim.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen tried to get his brain to put together coherent thought but it was hard when it felt like Jared was licking any common sense from him with each flick of his tongue. 

"Jay," he managed to get out. "Please."

He heard Jared chuckle slightly behind him but even with his brain hazy with pleasure he knew that there was no way his boyfriend would stop his teasing until Jensen was begging for it. The wet heat of Jared's tongue pushed into him again, perfect pleasure that had Jensen's arm giving way and he buried his face into the thick blanket beneath him. Long fingers wrapped around the hard length of Jensen's cock, pushing him towards the edge once more, dual pleasure that did nothing for Jensen's ability to speak. 

"C'mon, Jen," Jared teased with kittenish licks to Jensen's hole. "Tell me what you want."

Jared sealed his mouth around the rim once more, fucking his tongue into Jensen with small thrusts that made Jensen want so much more. 

"Please, please, _please_ ," he begged, each push of the warm tongue inside him making more pleading fall from his lips. "Want... I want you..."

"Want me to what?" Jared demanded. "Tell me what you want and I'll give it to you."

Once more Jared's hands left him before his orgasm hit and Jensen cried out in frustration, trying to gather himself enough to be able to ask for the one thing he wanted.

"Fuck... please... need you to..." he gasped. "Want you to... fuck me... Your cock..."

The words were barely out before Jared's tongue left his body, one last lick before big hands landed on Jensen's hips, pulling him up and back against Jared's body. He heard the sound of a lid being opened behind him and he didn't need to look around to know that the slick sound behind him was Jared stroking lube over his big cock. Despite knowing that, Jensen couldn't help but shiver when two fingers entered him, pushing cold lube deep inside. 

"Jay," he gasped out when the fingers brushed right over his prostate. 

"I got you," Jared said with one last thrust of his fingers. 

Jared's hands felt big and strong where they curled over Jensen's hips but all of Jensen's focus was on the blunt pressure of Jared's cock against his hole, slick skin sliding against slick skin for the briefest of moments before Jared was pushing inside with one slow, deep thrust that made all the air rush out of Jensen's lungs.

“Jesus fuck," Jared groaned behind him.

Jensen gasped and arched, pushing back against the hard length stretching him wide, perfect width filling him up. He wanted more, _needed_ more, but his boyfriend were staying still, clearly waiting for Jensen's body to adjust.

"I can take it," Jensen managed to get out. "Please, I _want_ to feel..."

The man behind him didn't let him keep on talking, instead he pulled the hard length of his cock out all the way, making Jensen try to push back to get it back inside. A low chuckle filled the room for just a second before Jared pushed inside once more, quick snap of hips that made a cry leave Jensen's lip when pleasure exploded through his body. That time Jared didn't let Jensen catch his breath, instead he put up a hard rhythm, deep thrusts inside that soon had Jensen sobbing in pleasure. He tried to push himself up on all fours once more, but one big hand landed on his shoulder, holding him back down easily while his other hand gripped even tighter on Jensen's hip. 

"God, love you so much," Jared mumbled above him. "Love having you like this, fuck... Love everything about you."

"Love..." 

Jensen didn't get more out before the previous teasing combined with Jared's cock brushing against his prostate on each thrust was enough to make Jensen come, a scream ripping from his lungs when he felt his body grip Jared's cock tight. It seemed like his inner walls fluttering around his boyfriend was enough to pull him over the edge as well, causing Jensen to groan when he felt the big cock pulse inside him, painting his inside with thick, hot come until the only thing that held Jensen up was Jared's hands on him. 

"Fuck, you're amazing."

They collapsed together down on the blanket, Jensen too fucked out to really register the sticky wetness against his belly. He blinked his eyes up tiredly, gazing into the flickering fire while Jared fitted his lean body up against Jensen's, tangling their legs together. 

"Can I sleep here?" Jensen mumbled.

He didn't want to move, he was much too comfortable on the thick blanket, the heat of the fire keeping him warm and Jared's cock still buried deep inside. With Jared's big hand stroking patterns over his hip and up his side, causing Jensen to shiver at the soft touch, Jensen thought he couldn’t imagine a better way to spend a weekend. 

"Sleep," Jared said softly and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "I'll get you to bed later."

Jensen smiled and closed his eyes, drifting off to the sounds of the fire and Jared's deep breathing.

-¤-

"I'm tired," Jensen mumbled, leaning back against Jared, relishing in the solid warmth of the man's body.

"So no long walk around the lake?" Jared asked but Jensen was sure the man was smiling. 

He looked out over the crystal clear surface of the lake, only a thin layer of ice just at the very edge. Each breath of air was visible, thin white smoke from his lips and Jensen felt more alive than he had in a long time. Whenever Jared asked Jensen said that he had no problems with keeping _them_ a secret but it was in moments like this that he realized how wonderful it was to not have to hide. 

"No long walk," Jensen said.

Neither of them moved, Jared just wrapped his arms around Jensen's waist and Jensen snuggled back into his embrace, enjoying the novelty of being able to be outside with Jared like that, walking hand in hand and trading lazy kisses whenever they wanted to.

"I wish every day could be like this," Jensen admitted softly. 

Jared's grip around him tightened at that and he felt the tall man breathe into his hair for a few long moments, silence stretching out between them without ever becoming uncomfortable. 

"I wish that to," Jared agreed. "I don't like hiding you away."

A wave of heat traveled through Jensen's body at the thought of Jared some day being able to show him off, to be proud of him. He didn't know if it could ever be a reality but the dream was there, a hazy mirage somewhere in the back of his mind. Jared turned Jensen in the circle of his strong arms and Jensen went willingly, melting into the kiss that Jared pressed to his lips. Heat surged up when Jared licked into his mouth, sinful tongue tangling with Jensen's before he sucked Jensen's tongue into his own mouth. Jared's hands where sliding down to cup Jensen's ass, pulling him close until the only thing separating them was their layers of clothing and Jensen wished they would have come to the cabin during the summer when he could have stripped Jared naked and ridden him just there by the lake.

While the cold was refreshing, Jensen wanted warmth on his skin, wanted to be able to take his time with driving Jared insane in every way possible. He needed that, needed to show his boyfriend everything he could be and he needed it now.

"Cabin," he mumbled against Jared's lips. "Now. Need..."

He didn't get further until Jared's big hands traveled down further to grab just under Jensen's ass to lift him up. Jensen took the opportunity and when Jared started carrying him back to the cabin Jensen let his lips travel down his boyfriend’s strong neck, licking over sensitive skin. Jared stumbled slightly but managed to keep upright, but when they reached the cabin he seemed to forget himself for awhile because he slammed Jensen up against the wall and kissed him until they both were breathless. 

"Bedroom," Jensen pointed out with a smile. "And much less clothes."

With a groan Jared let him down, opening up the door and a strong hand circled Jensen's narrow wrist, pulling him towards the bedroom before the door had even slammed shut behind them. 

"No," Jensen said quietly when Jared started pushing him towards the bed.

"What?" Jared gasped, shock on his face.

"No," Jensen repeated with a small smile, "Not like this... I wanna... Get undressed."

Jared's slanted eyes narrowed for a second but then he pulled his clothes off with quick, desperate motions that had Jensen's own arousal soar high, his cock twitching in the confines of his jeans. When Jared sprawled himself out on the bed, it took a lot of willpower for Jensen to not crawl up his body and beg to be taken right then and there. He wanted, wanted _so_ much to feel Jared inside of him but there was something else he wanted even more. Walking over to his own duffel bag Jensen pulled in a few deeps breaths to calm himself down, his body tingling with both arousal and nerves. 

"Jen, I think you..." Jared started but then his eyes went wide when Jensen turned back towards the bed, coils of soft rope in his hand. "Jen?"

"I packed these before I knew we were going here," Jensen said quietly. "I had hoped you'd use them on me but... I really want to..."

He didn’t say what he wanted, instead he let it loop around his boyfriend’s bare ankle in a move that made it very clear what he wanted. 

"Can I?" he asked.

Jared's gaze was darker than Jensen had ever seen it before, lust and heat that made Jensen shiver in anticipation. 

"Anything you want," Jared said simply and relaxed down on the bed, eyes locked with Jensen's.

Jensen smiled softly before he got to work. He knew this, knew how tie perfect knots to keep even someone with Jared's strength down on the bed and he took his time doing it. When the idea had first struck him he had been surprised to find it as arousing as he did, but he had imagined it the other way around. Had imagined Jared tying him down to have his wonderfully wicked way with him, but slowly tying Jared spread eagle on the bed was even better. He loved it even more just because Jared was so much bigger, all hard muscles that could so easily overpower Jensen, but still the man let Jensen take control.

When the last knot was tied into place, leaving Jared unable to move, spread out on the bed, Jensen took a step back to look at the man in front of him. The white of the rope was a sharp contrast to his boyfriend’s tanned skin, and Jensen reached out to feel it, making sure that there was no way the older man could move. Slowly he started removing his own clothes, one piece at the time without ever taking his gaze off Jared, taking in how the man's eyes went darker the more skin he revealed. 

"God damn, Jensen," Jared mumbled when Jensen was finally naked. "You're such a _tease_."

"Yeah," Jensen admitted easily and got up beside Jared on the bed. "And you love it."

His boyfriend’s smile was answer enough and Jensen leaned in for a deep kiss, wet slide of lips on lips until he had to pull back if he wanted to keep himself calm enough to do what he wanted to do and not just straddle the man right away.

"I love you," Jared said easily, causing Jensen's breath to hitch for a moment with the emotions coursing through his body.

With a smile Jensen leaned in again but instead of going for Jared's mouth he let his lips trail down Jared's jaw to the soft skin of his neck, tongue licking out to press against the spot where he could feel the man's pulse beat steady just below the skin. He heard and felt Jared's shivering moan at the soft touch and that little tell tale sound of arousal was enough for Jensen to start working himself down Jared's body. His boyfriend's body felt scorching hot under Jensen's lips when he kissed down over skin stretched taut over collar bones.

"Jen, damn..." Jared gasped, trembling under Jensen. "Are you trying to kill me?"

Jensen didn't answer, instead he hummed low under his breath and licked down to close his lips over one hard nipple, sucking it into his mouth and then flicking his tongue over the hard nub. He took his time working Jared's body with mouth, tongue an fingers, licking over one nipple while his fingertips played with the other until Jared was cursing but not yet begging. Slowly Jensen licked further down, tongue sliding over hard panes of muscle, tracing the contours in a way he never had allowed himself to do before. A part of Jensen wanted to stretch out on top of Jared, feel each part of the man's body against his own but he wanted to make Jared beg, just like Jared had made him do so many times. 

He continued to lick further, pressing open mouthed kisses over sharp hip bones before tracing over hard thighs but making sure to not come too close to the hard line of Jared's cock. The man beneath him was trembling with each touch of Jensen's lips on his skin and when Jensen licked back up he let himself stop at the groove where thigh and hip connected, sucking until his mouth left a perfect mark on Jared's skin. 

"Jesus fucking Christ," Jared groaned. "You fucking tease. Will you suck me already? Please?"

Jensen smiled against the warm skin under his lips, but he kept on kissing around the hard line until he could feel Jared started to struggle against the ropes binding him to the bed.

"Please, Jen, just... _please_. I need you to... just do something," Jared pleaded. 

Slowly Jensen shifted until he was placed between Jared's legs instead of beside him and with a small smile he leaned forward, flicking his tongue out to gather the pre-come wetting the head. 

"Yes..." Jared breathed out.

With one quick motion Jensen parted his lips, sealing them tight over the head of Jared's cock before sliding down with one fluid movement until his nose was pressing against Jared's sweat slicked skin. Above him he heard Jared gasp for air, cursing under his breath until the words shifted into guttural moans when Jensen started sliding up and down the man's cock. Jensen loved the feel of Jared in his mouth, the salty taste of pre-come painting his tongue with each slide.

He pressed his tongue against the underside of Jared's cock, holding still until Jared was once more pleading for him to do something, do _anything_ and Jensen's own need was rising with each word from Jared's lips, each slide of hard length between his lips.

Not being able to take it any longer he let Jared's cock slide from his mouth with a wet pop before he reached to the small bedside table, fingers closing around the lube waiting for him there. He knew that Jared was watching his every move so he opened the lid slowly and coated two fingers before he moved to straddle Jared, legs firmly placed on each side of his waist.

"Can you hurry up already?" Jared gritted out, hips rolling up what little they could in a search for some friction. 

Jensen didn't answer, instead he looked into Jared's eyes and balanced himself with one hand against Jared's chest, rolling his hips back to make Jared's cock brush against his ass for just a moment. He smiled when Jared hissed at the contact, hazel eyes almost black, and then he reached behind himself to press his own slick fingers against his hole. Pleasure shot through his body at the first gentle touch, need and want so tightly tangled together that it was hard to breathe. He couldn't hold back a high pitched whine when he pushed two fingers in, not having patience enough to go slow any longer, and he worked himself open with hard thrust of his fingers.

"You're gorgeous like this," Jared mumbled. "So fucking pretty getting yourself ready for me."

The words washed over Jensen, making him whimper when his fingers barely brushed that sensitive spot deep inside and that was it, ready or not Jensen just couldn't wait any longer, he _needed_ Jared inside him. Jared hissed when Jensen reached for the lube and coated the man’s cock with liberal amount of the clear fluid, stroking the length a few times before he shifted and aligned himself so that Jared's cock was nudging at his slick opening. 

"I love you," he whispered quietly.

Jared opened his mouth to respond but before he could get a word out Jensen slid down with one little circle of his hips, not stopping until Jared was buried all the way inside of him. The sudden stretch and burn had Jensen whimpering but despite the brief pain he loved the feel of Jared's cock stretching him open.

"God, so big," he whimpered because the thought he would never get used to the way Jared felt. 

"Jensen," Jared managed to get out, clearly still fighting the restraints. "Can you fucking _move_ already."

A low laugh escaped Jensen at the pure desperation in his boyfriend's voice and he forced himself to stay still just a little bit longer but then he himself needed more and he swiveled his hips slowly. They both moaned at the friction it caused and what little restraint Jensen had left crumbled and he leaned back, balancing himself with his hand on Jared's thighs.

"Fuck you look good like this," Jared groaned when Jensen started moving, circling shoves of his hips that made Jared's cock brush his prostate time and time again. "Wanna... _fuck_... wanna feel you, c'mon, Jen."

Jensen enjoyed himself too much to be able to take it slow, the buildup had been enough in itself to almost push him to the ledge but with the drag of Jared inside of him he couldn't do more than low breathy moans each time he pushed back down. He never thought that having Jared like this, all splayed out at his mercy, would be the turn-on it was, that it would make him push closer and closer to orgasm without a big hand wrapped around his cock. But even as good as it was, riding Jared with quick movements of his hips, he wanted Jared's hands on him and he leaned forward without even thinking about it. He barely reached the ropes around the man's wrists without pulling away too far and his fingers felt clumsy, his mind distracted by the way the head of Jared's cock still held him open, but he finally managed to untie both his boyfriend's hands. 

The response was instant, big hands on the small of his back that pushed him down hard at the same time as Jared's hips snapped up, filling Jensen faster than he had been prepared for. It was good, it was _beyond_ good, the way Jared's cock felt inside him and Jared's body pressed up against his own. 

"You drive me fucking insane," Jared growled and covered Jensen's mouth with his own.

Jared swallowed what low moans Jensen could get out, that was until a big hand pushed between their bodies to wrap around Jensen's cock and despite the tongue fucking into his mouth in rhythm with the cock in his ass, Jensen screamed into Jared's mouth when the orgasm hit him hard and unexpected. His whole body locked down around the cock inside and the moaned out when he felt Jared come, cock pulsing as it filled Jensen up. 

They weren't kissing any more, just sharing heavy breathes while they slowly came down from their shared orgasms. Jensen could feel his body shiver and that made his body squeeze Jared's cock in a way that made Jensen want to start all over again. 

"Jen," Jared said and pressed a kiss to the corner of Jensen's mouth. "Untie me?"

It took a few long moments before Jensen's brain caught up and he realized that Jared's legs were still tied to the bed posts. He whimpered when he slowly raised himself up until the softening cock left his body and then he shifted around the untie the knots, watching as the white rope fell to the floor. He leaned down to press soft kisses to where Jared's skin was slightly red from having struggled against the restraints but then he found himself pulled back into Jared's arms and pressed down with Jared hovering over him, kissing him deeply.

"That... was fucking wonderful," Jared smiled. "How about a small nap, and then I'll use those ropes on you? Let you see how teasing should be done."

Jensen shifted until he could wrap his legs around Jared's waist and push his hips up until their sensitive cocks were brushing each other. He really didn't see a need for a nap after all.

-¤-


	7. The Winter Wonderland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected snow storm leads to some rather interesting ways to pass time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 15, Jared 26)

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared slipped one hand down inside his unbuttoned jeans, dragging over his cock through a layer of soft cotton and he groaned softly at the feeling that sent heat through his body. He had every plan to enjoy a few days off from work, Chad spending a week at his parent's was just a wonderful bonus. The only thing that could have made it better was if Jensen could have been with him. But even though the boy's parents had been gone the night before, leaving them a lot of time to spend some quality time in bed, they would be home soon and Jared doubted Jensen would find a reason to come over. 

Jared had a vivid imagination, though, and he put that to good use, closing his eyes he imagined the way Jensen would look kneeling between his spread legs. His cock hardened more at the mere thought of it, the way Jensen would look up at him from under long eyelashes, lips parted as he leaned in to lick a stripe over Jared's cock. Jared's hips snapped up at the memory of the last time Jensen had gone down, circled that velvety soft tongue over the head, gathering pre-come that the boy had swallowed with a pleased moan.

"Oh fuck," Jared groaned and pushed his boxers down to free his erection.

Closing his eyes Jared could almost see it, green eyes dark with lust as Jensen wrapped his lips tight around Jared's cock, slow slide down until the boy couldn't take more and Jared could feel the soft throat flutter around him when Jensen fought to breathe. Jared loved it, loved the way his young boyfriend seemed to crave his cock, easily sliding down between Jared's legs, ignoring what ever movie they had been trying to watch in his eagerness to get Jared in his mouth. 

"So good," Jared mumbled low when he wrapped one big hand around his dick. 

He could almost hear the way Jensen would moan around him, soft sound sending vibrations through Jared's body, bringing him closer and closer to orgasm with each flick of Jensen's tongue against over heated skin. His fingers curled around his cock, stroking it softly, almost hesitantly, just the way Jensen had done when he first found out what his hands around Jared's cock could do. Jared groaned when he thought of how Jensen's small hands had felt around his dick back then, so much smaller than they were now. For a while he tried to imagine how Jensen had acted back then, too small and too fragile in a way that caught Jared's blood on fire, but his mind kept flicking to how Jensen had looked the night before, bent over the back of the couch with Jared's cock sliding in and out of the boy's ass. 

His cock pulsed out more pre-come at the memory and Jared's fingers gathered it up, sliding down his length to make the friction even sweeter but nothing compared to how it felt to be inside of Jensen. Jensen was silken heat and perfect pressure around his cock each time he pushed inside. Jared's hand on his cock picked up speed when he visualized Jensen spread out before him, perfect pink rim surrounding his cock, lube glistening on skin each time Jared pulled out only to push back in hard enough to pull soft moans from Jensen's lips. 

"Fuck, fuck..." he heard himself mumble, not really aware of speaking. 

Heat crackled under his skin and he let himself remember what Jensen looked like when he came: skin perfectly flushed, neck taut as the boy threw his head back and moaned out his pleasure, pink lips moving but no words coming out, the boy beyond the capability of speech. Jared came hard with the thought of Jensen's inner muscle squeezing him tight, body writhing beneath his, pushing in to each hard thrust. Hot come spilled over his belly and his own hand, cock twitching weakly with the mental image of Jensen licking Jared's come off his fingers, white flecks on pink lips. 

Jared's breathing was heavy by the time his cock gave a last twitch and he thought he could fall asleep right away if he let himself, lazy contentment flowing through his veins. He was just about to let himself sleep when his phone started ringing on the beside table, vibrations enough to almost make it fall to the floor. 

"God damnit," Jared groaned and reached with his free, not come-stained hand to grab the phone, not even checking the number. "Hello?"

"Hello Jared, it's Donna. Donna Ackles."

Jared felt heat rush up his cheeks and he was suddenly very aware of the fact that he just had an amazing orgasm fueled by the memories of fucking the woman's underage son. 

"Hello, Donna," he answered, wincing at how his own voice sounded. 

"Oh, did I wake you? Did you work late last night? I'm so sorry," Donna said quickly. "I just... I have a favor to ask you, Jared."

"I'm awake," Jared said quickly, pushing aside the guilt. "What do you need from me?"

He reached for his own discarded t-shirt and cleaned some of the come away quickly but not really feeling any better despite it.

"You know me and Alan went to visit his sister, right?" Donna asked.

"Yes," Jared supplied. "Jensen told me... last time he was checking on the dogs.”

"Well," Donna said with a sigh. "This damn snow pretty much kept us grounded here, we won't make it back in the afternoon like we thought we would. Actually we won't be able to get back until Sunday evening according to the weather reports."

"Oh," Jared said, a bright flare of hope coming to life inside of him. "That's really too bad, Donna. What about the kids then?"

Donna sighed softly, but she didn't really seem upset so Jared let himself relax even though he almost crossed his fingers waiting for her next words. 

"Josh already was at a friend’s place and they said he could stay there for the weekend and Kenzie was at Lily's place, I swear the girl is practically living there nowadays," Danna said with a small laugh. 

Jared pushed himself up on the bed, leaning back against the head board while he waited for the woman to get back on topic.

"But Jensen is still at school, he doesn't get off until four today. If they even keep the schools open that late with the snow coming down," Donna said and Jared heard her voice turning pleading. "Is there _any_ way he could stay with you for the weekend?"

A smile curled Jared's lips, his cock hardening slightly at the thought of having Jensen in his bed for the entire weekend and his cheeks heated once more. 

"Of course, Donna," Jared said, forcing himself to sound relaxed. "Want me to pick him up at school?"

"Oh would you?" Donna said, sounding a lot more cheerful. "That would be awesome. You know, for a boyscout he really hates walking in snow the silly thing."

Jared tried to stifle a laugh but he was pretty sure that Donna picked up on his amusement. 

"Jared, don't tell him I said that," she asked and he could hear the smile in her voice. "But really, you're okay with it? I know that babysitting a teenager can't be all that fun, but I know Jensen would much rather stay with you than any of his friends, he really must love your dogs."

For a moment Jared really wanted to sink through the floor, guilt churning in his belly from the trust Donna clearly put in him, but the thought of Jensen sliding his arms around Jared's neck, brilliant smile on his lips, was enough to quiet down the guilt and Jared ended the phone call with some reassurances that he really didn't mind Jensen staying there for the snowy weekend. Looking at the clock he realized that he needed to get ready if he wanted to catch Jensen before the school closed because he had no doubts it would get cancelled early considering the heavy snowfall outside.

-¤-

The school building looked different when covered in a thick blanket of snow, every sound of the world muffled as Jared got out of his car and walked across the parking lot. He had hoped to wait for Jensen in the car but he didn't know when the boy would come out and sitting in a car in what was shaping up to be a more than a decent sized blizzard just wasn't an option.

When he walked inside he realized that the corridors were too quiet, none of the myriad of sounds he remembered from his own school time and he worried he had already missed Jensen if not for the fact that he should have seen the boy on the drive to school had he been walking. He tried to remember what Jensen had said he would be doing that day, words about English, Math and PE flickering through his mind but he knew he had been way too busy focusing on the movie they had been watching and the way Jensen had felt pressed up against him. Still, he made his way through empty corridors until he found a sign guiding him towards a set of locker rooms and the gymnasium. 

The big room was abandoned, except for two boys on the furthest end, dribbling a ball between them and familiar laughter reached Jared. He smiled at the sound of Jensen's laughter echoing along the walls but the presence of the other boy did cause issues and Jared straightened his back before walking closer and calling out for the boy. 

"Jensen Ackles!"

Jensen almost tripped over the ball when he spun around to face Jared and pure surprise gave way to a brilliant smile when their eyes met. Jared had expected to have to come up with excuses as to why he was there, lying until the other boy would think he was only some friend of Jensen's parents. What he hadn't expect was for Jensen to kick the ball away before running over to Jared and throwing himself against him, arms wrapping around Jared's neck. The feel of Jensen in his arms, and the warm smell of his hair, felt like home to Jared and he wrapped his arms around the smaller boy without even thinking about it, that was until the other boy cleared his throat pointedly. Jared could feel the blood drain from his face but to his surprise Jensen didn't pull away, instead he let his arms drop and put his arms around Jared's waist instead.

"So this is the boyfriend?" the other boy asked, blue eyes darting between Jared and Jensen. 

When Jensen's smile didn't dim, just turned slightly smug and almost possessive Jared felt himself relax because he was suddenly sure who the boy was.

"That would be me," he agreed. "And I dare to say that you're Chris, or Jen wouldn't still be wrapped around me like this.

"Yeah," Jensen said before Chris had time to say anything. "Jay, meet Chris. My best friend. Best friend Chris, meet Jared. My boyfriend."

Pride was evident in Jensen's voice and Jared realized how much it must mean to Jensen to be able to introduce Jared as his boyfriend for the very first time. He couldn't help but lean down to press a kiss to the top of the boy's head. 

"I think this is where I should tell him to guard your virtue and that I will hurt him if he hurts you," Chris said dryly. "That wont happen. Because you don't have any virtue left, and because your boyfriend could snap me like a twig. Jeez, Jen, couldn't find a bigger one?"

Jensen laughed softly and Jared saw a flush creep up the boy's cheeks and he know enough of the heated glance Jensen sent him to know where his boyfriend’s mind was heading.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen couldn't really believe what was happening, that he was standing in front of his best friend with his _boyfriend's_ arms around his shoulders, Jared's strong body pressed up against his. He saw his friend look between them, gaze lingering on where Jared's lip were hovering over Jensen's hair.

"Jen doesn't need bigger," Jared said and pulled Jensen even closer. "I'm big enough, right baby?"

Chris burst out laughing and Jensen groaned quietly, knowing full well that Chris would not let that one slide.

"Right," Chris drawled. "I'll just head out then. Nice meeting you, Jared. At least I know who Jensen is daydreaming about all the time. And Jen? Have fun... _baby_..."

With a smirk Chris kicked the ball into a corner before picking up his backpack and leaving the room with a small wave. When they were alone Jensen punched his boyfriend in the arm and glared up at him. 

"You had to call me stupid pet names?" he said with a scowl and then his brain finally caught up with what was happening. "Wait... What are you doing here?"

Jared laughed and pulled Jensen with him over to a set of benched on the far side of the room.

"What's the risk of someone coming here?" Jared asked, looking around the empty room. 

"None existent," Jensen said."Coach is gone for the day, and even though the other teachers will stay until the school buses arrive they're in the other section of the school, that's why me and Chris like to hang out here."

"Good."

Jensen couldn't hold back a surprised little sound when Jared pulled him down on his lap, wrapping strong arms around Jensen's waist to keep him in place.

"I'm not sure if you noticed, but there's sorta a blizzard happening outside," Jared said.

"Mmmm," Jensen mumbled and leaned closer to Jared. "That's why me and Chris stayed here playing for a while, hoping for the snowfall to let up."

An amused sound left Jared's lips, causing Jensen to raise an eyebrow as he waited for the older man to speak up. Jared seemed distracted though, hands sliding in under Jensen's sweater to stroke over warm skin.

"So you waited until there was _more_ snow before you walked home?" Jared said with a low laugh.

Jensen wanted to answer, to say anything, but he thought that Jared's fingers on his body might be hardwired straight to his cock, his brain really failing to string coherent thoughts together.

"Jared," he gasped softly.

"I'm here 'cause your mom called. Flights have been cancelled and it seems like they are stranded for the weekend. Your mom wants you to stay with me."

Happiness soared through Jensen's body and he pressed soft kisses over Jared's face, feeling the tender brush of eye lashes against his cheek before Jared captured his mouth in a long, deep kiss. 

"I get to stay with you? All weekend?" Jensen said, barely daring to believe what Jared told him because longer time together wasn't something they were spoiled with.

"Yeah," Jared confirmed. "And wanna know something even better?"

Jared tilted Jensen's head to the side, pressing open mouth kisses against Jensen's neck and the soft drag of lips sent shivers of pleasure through his body while effectively removing any chances of his brain being able to put full sentences together.

"What?" he managed to gasp out, moaning low when Jared scraped his teeth over his skin. 

"Chad is gone for the weekend," Jared said, pulling back slightly. "I will have you all to myself."

"Oh..." Jensen said, mouth falling open.

"Know what that means?" Jared asked.

Jensen couldn't help but smile an all too sweet smile at his boyfriend at the same time as he rolled his hips slightly. 

"That I don't need to be quiet when you fuck me so hard I can barely walk?" he asked, making his voice sound as innocent as possible.

"Fuck," Jared groaned. "Damnit Jen, you can't just say stuff like that. Wish I could do that now, feel you around me... So fucking perfect."

Looking around the empty gymnasium Jensen smiled and slid off Jared's lap, grabbing his boyfriend’s hand and tugging at him until he stood up. 

"Come," Jensen said. "I wanna... just come with me."

He dragged Jared with him across the room, only stopping to grab his messenger bag before pulling Jared with him through a side door, stopping when he stood in the middle of the abandoned locker room. When he turned around he saw Jared look around the room, eyes trailing over red painted lockers before his gaze zeroed in on Jensen once more, eyes almost black with lust.

"Jen..." Jared said slowly. "Either you get us out of here right the fuck now or..."

"Or what?" Jensen asked and took a step closer. 

"Or I'm gonna fuck you right up against these lockers," Jared said, closing the distance between them and pulling Jensen close, like he already knew what the answer would be. 

"Please."

The word was barely out before Jensen found himself slammed up against the lockers, hard enough for his teeth to rattle before Jared's mouth covered his, perfect heat as Jared's tongue pushed his lips apart. Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck, pressing up against his boyfriend’s tall frame.

"What if... damnit Jen," Jared gasped, hands locking down on Jensen's hips to hold him still. "What if someone comes?"

"No one will come," Jensen insisted, because in all the late afternoons he and Chris had spent there, they had never been interrupted. "There's a newer gym building, no one uses this one anymore. Please Jay, _please_. I want you..."

Jared's mouth covered his once more and big hands moved up under his t-shirt, sliding over sensitive skin and Jensen shivered at the touch. His boyfriend barely stopped the kissing long enough to get both their shirts off, throwing them over a low bench before he pressed their bodies together once more, naked skin on naked skin. Jensen withdrew one arm, pushing it in to the pocket of his jeans for a moment before he found the small little packet inside. He pushed it into his boyfriend's hand and saw Jared's eyes go wide when he looked down at it. 

"Lube?" Jared asked a bit stunned. "Why are you carrying lube around at school?"

Jensen felt heat rush up his cheeks and he looked down at the small satchel in Jared's big hand.

"I had kinda hoped to... well," he said quietly. "I had hoped to be able to go by your place before I went home, but then the snow and.. well..."

Jared's big hand cupped his jaw, forcing his head back until their gazes met.

"You planned to prepare yourself for me?" Jared asked and ripped the package open with his teeth. "Planned to open yourself up for me?"

Jensen opened his own jeans, sound of buttons popping loud in the otherwise big room and he could feel Jared's eyes on him when he shimmied out of his jeans, letting them fall to the ground and toeing out of them as well as his shoes and socks. Standing naked in font of Jared in the middle of his own school felt strange, it was also one of the hottest thing that had ever happened to him. 

"Well, did you?" Jared asked, stepping closer and reaching around Jensen with one strong arm brushing slick fingers against his ass .

The slick fingers found their place, sliding perfectly over his hole and Jensen lifted one leg to wrap around Jared's thigh, trying to give him better access.

"Yeah," Jensen admitted on a breathy little moan. "Wanted to... god... Please... Wanted to be ready for you... so you could just..."

He didn't manage to get the words out because Jared pushed one finger inside and Jensen almost screamed when the finger hit his prostate dead on, making his whole body arch into Jared's.

"So I could just bend you over and take you?" Jared asked with a rough voice.

Jensen liked that his boyfriend sounded almost as wrecked as he himself felt and through the layer of Jared's clothes he could feel the hard line of Jared's cock pressing against him.

"Yeah, god.. fuck... yes," Jensen gasped and clung to Jared, afraid his legs would give way under the waves of pleasure that rocked his body. "Please, want you inside me, your... fuck.."

Sometimes his own words surprised him, it was like Jared's touch shut off his brain completely. He could still remember when they had first met and how the curses Jared spilled had made his cheeks heat and his skin crawl but three years had changed him, and he knew that Jared loved when he talked dirty. A sharp cry escaped him when Jared leaned down to close his mouth over the pulse point on Jensen's neck, sucking the sensitive skin in between his teeth at the same time as he pushed a second finger inside.

Jared seldom marked him up, always careful with not leaving any traces of himself on Jensen but for once he didn't let go, instead he kept sucking until there was no doubt that Jensen would have a mark to show for it. The thought of Jared's mark on his body made something possessive flare to life inside of Jensen, making him push down hard against the fingers inside him. 

"Want you to mark me, make me yours," Jensen gasped, grinding himself down on Jared's fingers.

"You _are_ mine," Jared almost growled, sliding his fingers free. "I wish I could always keep you marked like this."

Jensen shivered when Jared lifted his lube sticky fingers, dragging them over the blossoming mark on Jensen's neck.

"One day I'll be able to," Jared said and took a step back. "One day I wont have to hide you anymore."

The words were uttered as a promise, and Jensen leaned back against the lockers, not trusting his legs to keep him up. Jared didn't pull his clothes off, he just pushed his heavy winter jacket off before popping the button of his jeans, only pushing them down enough to pull his hard cock free and Jensen felt his mouth go slightly dry at the sight. There was something distinctly dirty about standing naked in front of Jared while the other man was almost fully clothed, stroking lube down the hard length of his cock.

"Jesus," Jensen groaned, head lolling back against the hard locker.

"Like what you see?" Jared asked with a teasing tilt of his head.

Like really wasn't the right word because Jensen had passed like the second he saw Jared standing in the gymnasium, the sight before him was beyond like, beyond hot.

"You're a tease," Jensen whispered but his voice carried easily in the silent locker room.

"Nah," Jared said with a shake of his head. "I'm really not. It's just teasing if I don't deliver and trust me, I really, _really_ plan to deliver."

With that he stepped closer, looming over Jensen for a second before strong hands curled around Jensen's hips. It was with a practiced move that Jared lifted him up and Jensen quickly wrapped his legs around Jared's waist. But for all the time they had been like that, all the times Jared had held him against a wall, it had never been like that before. Instead of skin on skin Jensen felt the rough drag of denim, the soft touch of Jared's warm sweater against his own overheated skin. He could feel the slick press of Jared's cock against where Jared's fingers had worked him open, a blunt pressure that had Jensen craving more.

"Please," he gasped and tried to push down but Jared's hands held a firm grip on his hips. 

"Want it so badly, don't you?" Jared asked when Jensen's hands clenched the fabric of his sweater.

"Bastard," Jensen gritted out through clenched teeth. "C'mon Jay, fuck me already."

Jared's hands slid down to cup his ass, spreading him wide and even though Jensen knew what was coming he couldn't stop himself from crying out when Jared pushed him down with one quick motion, sliding all the way inside.

"God, yes," he managed to get out, gasping for air.

"Jen," Jared moaned. "I love you boy, but you need to be quiet."

Any possibility of Jensen being quiet died when Jared rocked his hips up and the head of his cock slid over Jensen's prostate, pushing a keening sound out of him.

"Fuck," Jared gasped, lifting Jensen up before slamming him back down, hard, once more. "Love the sounds you make when I fuck you, but you know you have to be silent. Later I promise to fuck you until you scream yourself hoarse."

His mouth came down over Jensen's, swallowing each sound he made and Jensen clung to his boyfriend's strong shoulder, trying to push himself down on the hard cock filling him, wanting more friction on his cock where it was pressed against Jared's hard belly. Behind him the hard lines of the lockers cut into his back but he barely felt it, all he could focus on was the drag of Jared's cock inside him, sweet friction that made him moan into Jared's mouth. He almost screamed out loud when Jared's fingers brushed over where he was stretched wide around the man's cock.

"God, we shouldn't be doing this," Jared gasped against Jensen's kiss swollen lips.

It didn't seem like Jared was listening to his own words though, instead he fucked deeper and harder into Jensen, pressing him up against the lockers, fingers still brushing the place where their bodies were connected. Jensen felt like he was coming apart at the seams, the pleasure pushing higher and higher with each thrust and he didn't know if he wanted to come or if he wanted it to go on forever. His hands tugged at Jared's sweater, not enough for it to come off but enough for it to ride up so that Jensen's hard cock brushed skin instead of fabric.

That was all it took, skin on skin and Jensen was coming hard, body trembling with the force of his release as Jared's mouth silenced his cries. He thought his hands must be gripping Jared's sweater hard enough to tear the fabric. Just when he started to come down from his orgasm, Jared groaned against his lips and his grip on Jensen's ass tightened as he came, hot spurts of come painting Jensen's insides. 

"Oh, Jay, fuck so good," he whimpered when the feel of Jared coming inside him dragged out his own orgasm. "Love you, oh... Jay... fuck..."

Jared's mouth fell from his, lips dragging a path down Jensen's neck to the mark that Jared had left there, tongue laving over red bruised skin. 

"God damn," Jared groaned. "You're amazing. Love you so fucking much."

-¤-  
-¤-

Carefully Jared lifted Jensen up, feeling his softening cock slide out of that perfect, tight heat and the loss made both of them gasp out. He held his boyfriend steady while the boy got his balance back, blissed out expression on his face.

"I think we should... head out of here," Jared said, not surprised by how fucked out his own voice sounded. "I need to get you home and spread out on my bed."

Jensen smiled up at him for a second before he looked down at his own body and shifted slightly. 

"I think I need a shower," the boy said with a little grin. 

Jared let his gaze trace down over his young lover's body and his cock twitched when he saw the trail of come trickling down the boy's thighs. 

"Jesus fuck", he muttered and closed his eyes. "Yeah, you really do."

He could feel Jensen brush up against him when the boy went past him towards the shower but he didn't open his eyes until the sinful temptation that was his boyfriend was hidden away in one of the shower stalls. Jared stepped into the toilet and cleaned himself off as well, wiping away Jensen's come from his belly and smirking slightly at the specks of it on his sweater. When Jensen came back out Jared raised an eyebrow at how _not_ wet Jensen was and the boy shrugged slightly.

"No towel," he muttered. "I only cleaned up where it counts. Besides, there's a blizzard out there, no way I'm going out with wet hair."

Jared shook his head, amused about the things his boyfriend could obsess about. It was with some regret he watched naked skin disappear under clothes that were way too thin for the weather outside and he was reminded that Jensen was the age when looks were much more important than comfort. Sometimes he forgot that Jensen actually was a teenager after all.

"Let's get home," Jensen said as he pulled his jacket on and grabbed his messenger bag. 

A warm rush went through Jared at those words and it was with a smile he led Jensen out of the locker rooms and back towards his car. The school halls were deserted and they were almost back to the front doors before they met someone. 

"Jensen Ackles, what are you still doing here? Classes were cancelled hours ago."

Jared spun around to see an older man standing in the door to a class room, rugged good looks and a beard that was sprinkled with silver.

"Mr. Morgan," Jensen said, slight hint of panic in his voice as he took a step back, almost crashing into Jared. 

"And who might you be?" Mr. Morgan went on, gaze zeroing in on Jared.

"I'm a friend of the family," Jared said, forcing himself to not wrap a soothing arm around Jensen. "Jensen's parents got stuck at some relatives due to the snow so I came to pick him up.”

Mr. Morgan looked back and forth between them and Jared felt Jensen tremble ever so slightly where he was stepped up close, too close, to him. 

"Well, that's good," the man finally said with a smile. "You would freeze if you had to walk home in this weather after all. But head out now, we're rounding the last students up before we lock down the school for the weekend."

"Yes, Mr. Morgan," Jensen said and Jared dared to lay a hand on the boy's shoulder, pushing him towards the door when it didn't look like he was going anywhere.

"Oh fuck," Jensen mumbled when they were outside.

"Hey," Jared soothed the boy. "It's okay, it's not like he suspected anything."

Jensen spun around then, eyes wide and so full of worry and fear that Jared had to force himself to not wrap his arms around his young lover.

"Jay," Jensen said, sounding slightly weak. "He was coming _looking_ for students. What if he'd come fifteen minutes earlier?"

Jared could feel all the blood drain from his face, that possibility hadn't even crossed his mind but suddenly he realized how very close they had come to everything crashing down around them. He forced himself to take a few deep breaths before he pushed Jensen towards the car, neither of them speaking again until they had cleaned the car of a layer of snow and got inside, heater turned to max.

"Well shit," Jared muttered as he pulled out from the parking lot.

"Pretty much my thought," Jensen agreed, sagging back into the seat. "I can't... damnit. I can't lose you, I can't."

Had the weather not forced Jared to focus on the road ahead of them he would have reached out to hold his boyfriend's hand, supporting him in any way he could but the snow was still coming down hard and despite his big SUV he needed both hands to be able to keep the thing on the road. 

"You wont," he said. "We'll just...well... we just have to make sure to not fuck at your school again."

He could feel Jensen's gaze on him but he didn't relax until Jensen burst out laughing, a slender hand reaching out to stroke Jared's arm. 

"Good plan," Jensen laughed. "It was seriously hot though."

Jared couldn't argue that statement, having Jensen pressed up against the lockers had been mind blowingly hot and Jared was a bit sad they wouldn't be able to do it again. At least not for a few years.

-¤-

"Do you have any plans for the weekend?" Jensen mumbled the next morning, laying half on top of Jared and apparently not having any plans to move.

Jared let his arms circle the boy's waist, holding him close against his own body, slightly distracted by the feel of skin against skin.

"Well, I had planned to spend the weekend being annoyed I couldn't be with you, but that's a bust," Jared said as he let his hand drift down to cup the perfect swell of Jensen's ass.

"Sorry for disturbing your plans," Jensen snorted.

"It's okay," Jared said. "I'll blame your parents for that. But to be honest, I have an idea but not sure you’ll feel okay with it."

Jensen pushed himself up so that he was straddling Jared's waist, heavy comforter falling down to pool around him and a curious expression on his face. 

"What do you have planned?"

It really wasn't fair of Jensen to expect Jared to be able to stay coherent, not when he had the perfect view of a naked Jensen on top of him but Jared forced himself to focus on their discussion and not on the way Jensen looked.

"Well, you obviously know Chad by now, and I like that you do... so I was thinking that maybe your friend Chris could come over for movie night and some...well, not pizza because I don't think they’ll deliver in this weather. Home made lasagna?"

Whatever reaction he had expected it wasn't the one that he received; Jensen's eyes went wide and to his surprise Jared saw wetness catch in the boy's eye lashes before Jensen almost fell forward, soft lips pressing against Jared's in the softest of kisses.

"You'd really do that for me?" he asked, sounding slightly awed. "Hang out with two kids?"

Jared let his hands take a firm grip on Jensen's hips before he turned them, pushing Jensen down on his back while Jared hovered over him.

"He's important to you, right?" Jared asked, waiting until Jensen nodded. "Then he's important to me too. I'm sure you want to show off your amazing boyfriend after all."

"I really, _really_ do," Jensen said quietly. "I just didn't expect to ever get to do that.”

One day Jared would make Jensen stop doubting that they would last, he just wasn't sure how.

-¤-

Jared sat on the couch, watching Jensen walk back and forth in the limited space between the coffee table and the back door, worried glances towards the front door every now and then. Harley and Sadie lay in the corner, also following the boy's nervous pacing.

"Jen, it'll be okay," Jared said softly. 

"What if he..." Jensen started. "Maybe he'll be weirded out when he..."

The boy's fears were interrupted by the doorbell ringing cheerfully, making both Harley and Sadie bark and almost trample each other in their attempts to get to the door first. Jensen paled but when Jared stood up to walk to the door he knew that the boy was right behind him.

"You're okay?" he asked quietly when the doorbell rang out a second time. 

"Not really," Jensen said but he smiled shakily when Jared turned around to look at him. "But I want to do this. I want you to get to know him."

"Okay then," Jared said with a smile and opened the door.

Chris was barely recognizable, bundled up as he was in layer upon layer of thick clothing. The snow had stopped for awhile but Jared knew it was supposed to return during the night and that most people opted to stay inside rather than brave the deep blanket of snow that covered the town.

"Welcome," Jared greeted and stepped aside to let the boy in. 

"You had to decide to be social in a fucking snowstorm?" Chris grumbled as he shut the door behind him. "Really Jensen, the things I do for you."

Jared saw how some of Jensen's worries seemed to drain away at his friends grumbling and the boy took a step forward to help free Chris from the outer layers of clothing. 

"I'm worth it," Jensen said with a small shrug.

"Nah," Chris said as he pulled off his winter boots. "I'm just hear for the promise of free food."

Only then did Jared see the bag that Chris had dumped on the floor beside the door and it seemed that Jensen had done the same.

"You brought something?" Jensen asked.

"Clothes," Chris said. "Mom wouldn't let me outside unless I brought dry clothes in case the storm returns and... well..."

The boy went silent and glanced up towards Jared who quickly managed to put two and two together.

"I have guest bedrooms," he said easily. "If the storm returns you can spend the night here, it's no problem."

Chris looked at him and then over to Jensen before he got off the floor, peeling out of a thick sweater and it seemed like he finally was undressed enough to actually leave the small hallway.

"Your boyfriend seems okay," Chris said with a grin towards Jared. "So far at least. But dude, a house! How awesome isn't that?"

Jared shook his head in amusement when he saw the last of the tension drain off Jensen as his boyfriend tugged his friend inside, clearly wanting to give Chris a tour but neither boy got far before they were interrupted by the dogs who seemed to have grown tired of being ignored. 

"I'll prepare the food," Jared said, leaving the boys some time to themselves and he smiled when he heard a mumbled conversation start before he was out of earshot.

"He makes us food? And has a house? And comes picking you up from school so you don't have to walk?" Chris asked. "Jen, he's clearly awesome."

"Yeah," he heard Jensen answering before their voices drifted away. "He really is."

-¤-

"The snow started again," Jensen mumbled when they were on the second movie, food devoured and humans and dogs all content and lazy.

Jared looked towards the window where snow was falling heavily outside once more and then over to the other corner of the big couch where Chris sat, feet propped up on the coffee table

"I guess I'm staying the night," Chris said with a small frown. "Can I borrow the phone and tell mom?"

"Of course," Jared said and got up to fetch the boy the phone. 

He walked into the kitchen while Chris talked to his mother and opened the fridge to grab himself a beer when he felt a small hand against his lower back. 

"Can I have one?" Jensen asked. 

Jared turned around to look at his boyfriend, taking in the nervous way Jensen was chewing on his lower lip and the way his eyes darted between Jared's face and the bottle in his hands. Jensen had never asked that before and Jared wondered how much was because of Chris being there.

"I shouldn't supply minors with alcohol," Jared pointed out.

"You shouldn't fuck them either," Jensen said, small smile playing at his lips. 

"That's very true," Jared said but he still hesitated for a moment. "Have you had alcohol before?"

Jensen blushed and his gaze fell down towards the floor and when he spoke the words were barely audible.

"No. I've never... I wanted to do it somewhere I felt safe."

Jared grabbed two more bottles out of the fridge before he stepped close to Jensen, making the boy tilt his head back to look into Jared's eyes.

"Such a good boyscout," Jared smiled and leaned down to kiss Jensen softly.

"God you two are sappy."

Jensen almost jumped away from Jared, a blush staining his cheeks when Chris practically sauntered into the kitchen, eyeing the bottles in Jared's hands. 

"Planning to get us drunk?" he asked, sounding surprised. 

"Well, you're both staying the night so why not?" Jared said and handed the boy a bottle. "If your mom asks, all we did was drink lemonade and watch cartoons, right?"

"Obviously," Chris said with a grin. "Jensen, I totally approve of your cradle robbing boyfriend."

"I'm so happy," Jensen muttered, grabbing his own bottle.

Jared could see the satisfied smile on the boy's lips when the three returned to the living room and when they sat down again Jensen promptly placed himself in the vee of Jared’s spread legs, leaning back against his chest. Chris looked over at them, but he didn't seem disturbed by the closeness and Jared allowed himself to wrap an arm around Jensen's waist, pulling him even closer. He watched as Jensen lifted the bottle to his lips, hesitantly tasting the beer and then smiling, clearly enjoying the taste. 

He didn't really know how it happened, but he blamed it on Jensen being distracting because Jared barely noticed the boy putting on the next movie, he didn't really notice that the two boy's managed to down another few bottles of beer as well. It wasn't until Jensen pushed up to get them refills, swaying slightly before he managed to balance himself, that he realized that the two boys might have had a bit more than he had meant to give them. 

Chris seemed to be mostly drowsy, eyes half lidded where he was curled up in his corner of the couch, fingers stroking over Sadie's head where the dog was resting just beside him. But Jensen, had Jared known what Jensen would be like when intoxicated he would have given the boy alcohol earlier, and in private. 

"I love you," Jensen mumbled as he put down the new bottles on the table before he placed himself firmly on Jared's lap.

Jared didn't have it in him to feel bad about the way Jensen clung to him, not when it didn't seem to affect Chris in the slightest, the boy just looked amused when Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck. 

"I take it you like beer?" Jared said with a smile as his hands stroked down Jensen's back. 

"Beer is awesome," Jensen nodded happily. "But I like you more."

The boy shifted until he was straddling Jared and it took a moment before Jared realized what his boyfriend had in mind but then Jensen rolled his hips forward and moaned softly when their crotches rubbed together. 

"Yeah," Chris said and looked away. "That's my queue to get some sleep. Uhm, Jared, can I borrow this iPod? There are some things I _really_ don't want to hear."

Jared could only nod because right then Jensen pressed his soft lips to his, tongue finding its way into Jared's mouth and a low, happy sound escaped Jensen.

"And that would be one of those things," Chris said and took two of the bottles from the table as he disappeared into the guest room Jared had shown him earlier.

When Jensen rocked his hips against Jared's again, he did it with a whimpering moan that made Jared happy that Chris had taken the iPod because the pretty sounds Jensen made when they were having sex? Those sounds were for Jared alone. 

"You're so big," Jensen gasped, hips pressing into Jared's and hands sliding down his shoulders to stroke over his biceps. "Love that you're big...can just do whatever you want with me."

Heat and want was burning its way through Jared's body and he turned, pulling Jensen back into a deep kiss, licking his way into the boy's mouth until all the traces of beer was gone and he was left with a taste that was purely Jensen. 

"Jen," he gasped and tried to create some distance between them.

A low whine left Jensen when Jared pushed him away and what little willpower Jared had was about to crumble to pieces when he saw the boy's cheeks and neck flushed with arousal, the green of his eyes barely visible around pupils wide with lust. Jensen was beautiful, lips red and swollen from kisses as well as from the way the boy kept biting on his lower lip, and Jared needed to get him to his bed while he still was able to control himself. 

"Bed," Jared gritted out. "Jesus fuck, Jen. I need you in my bed within a minute or I swear I will fuck you right here on the couch."

A shiver ran through Jensen's body at that and Jared couldn't stop his hips for snapping up against the weight of Jensen on his lap but luckily it seemed that even Jensen realized that it wasn't a good thing for them to fuck on the couch with Chris so close, head phones or not. 

"Bed, now," Jensen gasped and slid off Jared's lap, trembling slightly as he gripped Jared's hand.

When Jared stood up he saw his young boyfriend sway, eyes heavy lidded and lazy as they dragged over Jared's body. 

"I love you," Jensen mumbled, a slur to his words. "And you love me, you _want_ me."

The door to Chris's room opened and Jensen almost stumbled over his own feet in surprise before Jared managed to catch the boy, steadying him as Jensen squinted slightly, trying to focus his gaze on the other boy.

"Look," Chris said with a raised eyebrow towards Jared. "I'm all for you making Jensen happy, but you know what would make _me_ happy?"

"If we didn't do it in the room next to you?"

"Exactly," Chris said. "Also, I'm expecting waffles for breakfast. You know, as compensation for mental trauma."

Jared didn't really want to admit it, but he was more focused on the way Jensen felt pressed up against him than the words Chris was speaking, the boy's back brushing against the hard line of Jared's cock and he knew that had it only been the two of them in the house Jensen would already be bent over the back of the couch.

"Yeah, waffles. Right," Jared said slightly distractedly and was answered by the door to the guest room slamming shut.

"Chris doesn't like me," Jensen said with the prettiest pout to his lips.

"He likes you loads," Jared pointed out. "But you know, Chad doesn't like to hear you beg either so..."

He didn't finish the sentence, instead he lifted Jensen up and slung the boy over his shoulder, happy for all the hours spent at the gym because they let him manhandle Jensen as easily as he had when they first met. Jensen let out a small yelp but when Jared started carrying him down to the basement apartment the boy managed to circle his hips, grinding his erection against Jared in a way that almost made him drop him middle of the stairs.

"Jensen," he groaned. "Patience, just another minute please."

Jensen went still but Jared could hear the low moans spilling from the boy's lips, edge of desperation that Jared shared fully and when he dumped the boy on his bed his hands went straight to his belt. His boyfriend didn't move, just lay splayed out on Jared's bed, pure temptation against his sheets, hips rising off the bed in slow, circling motions. Clothes falling to the floor was the only sound in the room apart from their heavy breathing and once Jared was naked, cock rock hard and curving up his belly, he didn't have it in him to be patient with getting Jensen naked. A low keening sound filled the room when Jared practically tore the boy's clothes off, reaching for the lube on the bedside table before the last garment had even fallen to the floor. 

Looking down on his boyfriend, skin flushed and eyes dark, spread out on his bed Jared had to pause for a moment, gathering himself together before he slicked two fingers with lube and reached down between Jensen's spread legs. He hesitated for a moment, not wanting to hurt his lover, but then a low whine from Jensen made him push both fingers in at once. He groaned when Jensen's body parted willingly, tight muscle clenching around his finger but no trace of discomfort on the boy's face. 

"Jared," Jensen gasped, hips rising up to push Jared's fingers deeper inside. "Want... more..."

Jared's gaze was locked to where his fingers were moving in and out of Jensen's body, pink rim clinging to him and if he wasn't already more turned on than he had been in a long time he would have taken his time, explored every inch of Jensen's body with fingers and tongue. As it was, he pushed his fingers deep, feeling Jensen easily relax to accept him, breathless please of more and please falling from his lips each time Jared's fingers slid over his prostate. 

"Need you, please, c'mon," Jensen mumbled. "Love you... inside me, please, I want you to... God, please!"

When he pulled his fingers out Jensen whimpered and his hands rose off the bed, reaching for Jared and there was no way for Jared to keep it together any longer. With a few quick strokes he slicked his cock with lube before positioning himself between Jensen's legs, pushing his thighs further apart before he gripped the boy's hips and lifted him up until he felt the boy's ass resting against his thighs. With a tight grip around his cock he pushed in, one hard slide into Jensen's body that had them both gasping for breath.

"Fuck," Jared gasped when he was sheathed fully inside the perfect heat of Jensen's body. "You feel so good around me."

Jensen's hands came up to grab at Jared's shoulders, blunt nails digging into his skin as the boy's body arched up against him, legs wrapping around Jared's waist.

"More," Jensen pleaded. "Harder, please. Fuck me harder."

Jared almost fell forward, hands on either side of Jensen's head to give himself better position to thrust deep and hard into the boy, making his body slide against the sheets. He could feel the heat of Jensen's ass tight around his cock, inner walls fluttering around him with each slide into the boy. 

"Jen," Jared moaned, leaning in to lick up the drops of sweat that had gathered at the hollow of Jensen's throat.

Small shivers ran through Jensen's body, sending vibrations up through Jared's cock and he could feel his orgasm starting to build already, tendrils of heat and need travelling up his spine. He licked up the graceful line of Jensen's neck, tongue tracing the line of his jaw before he could claim the boy's mouth in a deep kiss, swallowing the moans that he pushed out of the boy each time he bottomed out. He knew the sounds his boyfriend was making, knew that Jensen would probably come the second Jared wrapped a hand around his hard dick but that wasn't what he wanted and instead he held Jensen down on the bed, fucking into him even harder until he came hard, feeling Jensen tremble beneath him with each spurt of come filling him up.

"Need to..." Jensen gasped. "Please, want to come... need to..."

Jared batted away the boy's hand when he tried to reach for his own cock, ignoring the almost broken sounds that came from his young lover. With one final snap of his hips he pulled out, hearing Jensen gasp against his lips but before the boy could gather himself to protest Jared slid down his body. Jensen's hands fell from his shoulders when Jared licked a strip down the boy's chest and flat belly and he thought he heard Jensen gasp _oh my god_ before he wrapped his lips around the boy's hard cock. 

It wasn't often they did it like that, even though Jensen managed to make sure he got to wrap his lips around Jared's cock at least twice each week, and the weight on his tongue was unfamiliar, but so perfect it made him moan, cock twitching in a feeble attempt to get hard again. 

"Christ," he heard Jensen gasp out and looking up he saw the boy's head press down into the pillow, body curving up to push his cock deeper. "Yes, yes yes, please Jared. So good, Jay... so fucking..."

Jensen came with a scream he didn't really manage to bite back, body thrashing against the sheets as hot come flooded Jared's mouth. A second scream left the boy when Jared's fingers brushed over the sensitive skin of his balls, cock pulsing once more in Jared's mouth and when Jared swallowed around the cock in his mouth a low whimper left his boyfriend. He kept on sucking, milking the boy for each drop of bitter come before he licked him clean, not pulling away until Jensen weakly lifted a hand to try and push him away.

"You taste so good, baby," Jared mumbled as he stretched out beside Jensen. "Should suck you like this more often, you fall apart so prettily for me."

The only response he got was a low moan and a shiver as Jensen rolled over to his side and soft, swollen lips found Jared's in a deep kiss, Jensen clearly wanting to taste himself on Jared's tongue. Jared managed to wrestle them under the comforter before wrapping Jensen tightly in his arms.

"No way Chris didn't hear that," Jensen mumbled drowsily, alcohol and sex pulling him under quickly. 

"Yeah," Jared agreed. "I might need to make him waffles _and_ bacon in the morning."

Jensen didn't answer, already asleep with his head tucked under Jared's chin, warm puffs of breath against his neck and Jared tugged him even closer before flicking off the light and settling in for sleep. He was pretty sure he should feel bad about fucking Jensen with his best friend so close, but more than three years with Jensen and Jared was beyond feeling guilty. All he felt was fucked out and content.

-¤-


	8. The Time Apart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summertime leads to some unwanted time apart, but Jensen has a brilliant plan to make sure Jared doesn't forget about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 16, Jared 27)
> 
> Includes some very much NSFW pictures!

-¤-

Jensen sat with folded legs on Jared's bed and watched the man pack clothes into a suitcase. It wasn't the best way to spend a Wednesday evening in the middle of the summer but if he were honest with himself there was nowhere else he would rather be.

"One week is a long time," he mumbled to himself but in the silent room the words carried easily to Jared.

"Longest we've been apart since..."

He didn't need to complete the sentence for Jensen to figure out what he meant. It would be their longest time apart since Chad had found out about them, something Jensen really didn't want to think too much about. 

"It''ll be okay?" Jensen asked, flinching when he heard the question in his own voice.

Jared walked over to the bed and sat down in front of Jensen, lifting one hand to tangle it in Jensen's hair and pulled him in to press their mouths together, a wet slide of lips that had Jensen whimpering when _want_ started coiling low in his belly. 

" _We_ 'll be okay," Jared said when he pulled back. "It's one week, I will go to Chad's brother's wedding, and visit my parents for a few days while I'm in Texas. I will try and call but there will be a lot of people around me most of the time so I can't really promise anything."

Jensen moved to wrap himself in Jared's arms, licking his way into Jared's mouth, sucking his boyfriend's tongue into his mouth with a low moan. Jared's arms around him was something Jensen was sure he would never get tired of and he whimpered, pressing closer to his boyfriend in a plea for more. 

"Hey now," Jared mumbled. "We don't have time for that, you need to be home in fifteen."

"I hate being sixteen," Jensen muttered when Jared pulled away from him. "I just think we should have some time for...you know, good-bye fucking."

Jared laughed and got off the bed, returning to folding clothes to put into his suit case.

"I thought that was what we did last evening?" he asked with a grin. 

"Oh," Jensen said. "Does it count if it isn't the same day as the actual good-bye though?"

He smiled up at Jared, trying to hide away how sad he really was about Jared leaving because he didn't want to give his boyfriend any guilt over leaving. 

"I think it still counts," Jared said. "The _welcome home_ fucking though, that we need to have for at least as long as I was gone."

That made Jensen grin, sometimes Jared really had awesome ideas after all. 

"If you can't call, you'll text me?" Jensen asked and shuffled to the edge of the bed, pulling his sneakers off from where he had kicked them off when he arrived at Jared's. 

"I think that can be arranged," Jared said with a nod. "And you'll be a good boy and actually watch the dogs? For real for once."

"Hey, I'm a good dog sitter," Jensen pointed out. "Your dogs love me! It's my not fault they don't _really_ need to be taken care of that often.” 

Jared laughed and closed the lid of the suit case, lifting it up and carrying it up the stairs, Jensen trailing in his foot steps as Jared put it down in the hallway. He heard Chad move around in his part of the house, low curses sifting through to where he and Jared were standing and Jensen considered the likeliness of Chad forgetting something rather important at home, he found it quiet likely. 

"I'll miss you," he said, wincing slightly at the raw emotions lacing his voice. 

"And I'll miss you," Jared said and stepped closer, pushing Jensen up against the wall. "It sucks you can't be my plus one. But someday..."

"Yeah, someday," Jensen agreed before pulling Jared in for a deep kiss that neither of them broke until Chad came stumbling out of his room, suit case in hand. 

"Hey kid," he greeted Jensen with a grin.

"Really Chad, I do have a name," Jensen answered dryly. 

"I know, kid," Chad said and patted Jensen's head in a way that was too over the top to really be offending. "Will you be okay for this week?"

Jensen swallowed thickly at that, for all the teasing Chad did he knew that the man actually did care about him, and that meant a lot. There wasn't much support out there for him and Jared so having Chad on their side made things so much easier. 

"It's not like you're leaving me home alone for a week," Jensen pointed out. "I don't actually _live_ here after all. Me and the dogs will survive."

A car horn honked out on the street and Jared quickly pulled Jensen back in for a soft kiss and when he pulled back it was with both his arm around Jensen's waist, holding him close until another loud honk from the street made them pull apart.

"I love you," Jared said softly. 

"Love you too," Jensen said and bit back on the tears that really wanted to fall. 

He stayed out of view when Jared and Chad gathered their bags and suit cases, heading out the door and it wasn't until Jensen heard the slamming of car doors and the cab driving away that he allowed himself to sag to the floor, wrapping both arms around his knees as he allowed himself five minutes of breaking down and pulling himself back together before he had to go home. Harley and Sadie came and laid down next to him on the floor, the two dogs looking about as miserable as Jensen felt. 

-¤-

Jensen looked at himself in the mirror, stroking fingers down the scarf tied around his neck and shifting the hem of his shirt to smooth out any wrinkles, real or imaginary. So many years of different versions of his scout uniform and it felt like a second skin when he pulled it on, long gone were the days when the uniform made him feel awkward in any way. A part of him wondered if that had anything to do with Jared's apparent fondness for him in the uniform, the way his boyfriend's eyes darkened whenever Jensen appeared at his door step straight from a scout meeting. 

"Ready, Ackles?" a voice called out and Jensen turned around to see Richard de Klerk standing behind him and Jensen gritted his teeth together.

"Yeah. I'll be right there," Jensen answered.

Despite the years that had passed he and Richard had never became friends after Jensen beat him in the popcorn sale, not that Jensen himself had tried much. There was just some people he didn't care if he got along with or not.

"About time," Richard huffed. "I got better things to do, I met this real hot girl and..."

Jensen tuned the other boy out in favor of pinning some badges to his sash before he turned around and walked by Richard without a word, ignoring the low grumbles from the other boys. Even with Richard as company the scout camp was a good distraction for Jensen while Jared was gone, but he was happy it only was three nights or his irritation with the other boy would be too much. 

"Let's teach the new kids how to light a fire," Jensen said as he lead the way outside. "Preferably without starting a wildfire."

-¤-

"You're no fun."

Jensen looked up from where he had been flipping through the very hidden folder with photos on his phone, the one that was a folder hidden within a folder within a folder. Sometimes Jensen thought he was paranoid, but mostly he thought he was just playing it safe. For once he was very happy about the hidden folder though, because it meant he could look at pictures of Jared.

"Richard said just the same thing," Jensen pointed out. "Right about the time I told he was building the fire wrong."

"Well, Richard is an ass and he probably _was_ building the fire wrong, but you're still no fun," Chris said, scratching Sadie behind one ear. "Can you stop pining for like, ten minutes?"

"No," Jensen answered, just because he could. 

"I don't even know why I'm hanging out with you," Chris muttered. "Well, apart for having this entire house to yourself, which is kinda cool."

Jensen didn't point out how big and empty the house felt without Jared in it, he was rather sure Chris knew how he felt about it without him having to say it. 

"The wedding is tonight," Jensen said. "Which means that right now Jared is all dressed up in his suit, and probably dancing with several pretty girls."

Chris breathed out a heavy sigh and shifted around on the couch until he was looking at Jensen, one hand still patting Sadie's head.

"Which could have meant something, if Jared wasn't gay. And crazy for you. Mostly crazy for you."

"I just wonder if he's thinking about me the same way I'm thinking of him," Jensen sighed. 

"Wouldn't surprise me, you two are disgustingly sappy," Chris huffed and got up off the couch. "Why don't you just text him? Hell, send him naughty pictures or something. Then you’ll _know_ he thinks like that about you. Just let me get out of here first, it was bad enough to hear you have the hots for him. I don't need the visuals."

With that Chris smirked at Jensen and gave the dogs a few more pats before he headed out, calling something about _tomorrow_ over his shoulder but Jensen was too busy to really listen to his friend, his mind was already spinning plans as he looked down on the phone in his hand. 

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared looked down at the petite woman he was dancing with, slender arms that time and time again tried to pull him closer than was strictly necessary. He wondered if he should think she was beautiful, he thought he might be but if was honest with himself he hadn't looked at _anyone_ for years. No one came close to the beauty that was Jensen. He was just about to say something when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he reached for it without really thinking about it and only when he looked up again did he see the offended look on the woman's face before she turned around and walked away. He caught Chad's amused look from across the room and with a little shrug Jared started weaving his way through the crowd until he reached his friend and together they found two free chairs in a corner

"That woman doesn't like you," Chad pointed out in a lull of the music.

"The feeling is mutual," Jared grinned and accepted a glass of champagne from his friend before he looked down at his phone.

"Text from Jensen?" Chad asked when Jared smiled as he saw the name on his screen.

Jared only nodded and his fingers moved over the screen to open the text and he barely had time to think over the _super secret for Jared only_ text before an image loaded and Jared suddenly started coughing when he accidentally inhaled some of his champagne.

"Fuck," he gasped when he shakily managed to put his glass down.

"What was _that_ about?" Chad asked and started reaching for Jared's phone.

"No!" Jared snapped and held it out of Chad's grasp. "You're _not_ seeing this. Ever. I would have to kill you, like seriously kill you if you saw this."

Chad look utterly puzzled before his gaze flickered down to the phone once more and a sudden spark of understanding lit up his eyes.

"Dude, really?" Chad said with a laugh. "Kid is growing up if he's sending you dirty texts, are you two sexting?"

Jared glared at his friend but his gaze flickered back to the phone and the picture that was hotter than anything his phone had ever shown him before, and that included some porn surfing he might have done. 

"We're not _sexting_ , Chad," he gritted out. "Let's just say that... Jensen knows how to use a camera phone. And he's a fucking tease."

Chad burst out laughing hard at that and reached out to pat Jared's shoulder a few times before he stood up.

"Right, I don't wanna know more," he grinned. "But that kid will be the death of you, does he even have limits? Anyway, I'm gonna go dance. Have fun with your... not sexting. Good luck with that."

Jared was too busy staring down at his phone to really listen to his friend. He was grateful for being in a corner of the reception, no one really looking his way because the light barely reached his secluded spot. Making extra sure no one was in viewing distance he looked down at the picture once more and groaned. Chad really was right because Jensen would be the death of Jared.

  


He stared down at the picture, at the delicious curve of Jensen's back and firm ass and he could feel his cock harden in his pants in a way that was far from appropriate considering where he was. Quickly he typed in a few words and sent them away before he clicked the picture down and tried to calm himself.

_You're not playing fair._

Before he could even consider putting the phone away he felt it vibrate in his hand and he was thankful he had remembered to put it on silent, making sure no one was watching he opened the message, but no new picture popped up on his small screen. 

_Maybe. I just want you to think of me._

Jared smiled at that but even though he longed to call Jensen, to hear the boy's voice, he knew that there was no way he would be able to call Jensen without things getting out of hand. 

_Are you sleeping at my place?_ he texted instead, adjusting himself discreetly when he was sure no one was glancing his way.

_Yes. Call me later._

"Dude, stop pining over jailbait," Chad said when he landed on the chair next to Jared once more, new flutes of champagne in his hand and Jared gladly accepted his glass.

"Fuck, Chad," Jared hissed and looked around but he was rather sure no one was close enough to hear them.

"Relax," Chahd said. "No one here would understand even if they _did_ hear. And my point stands, you're pining over your jailbait boyfriend when there is cake to be had."

"Cake?" Jared said, straightening up in his chair. "Time to cut the wedding cake?"

"Yeah," Chad said. "C'mon, we have some cake, drink a bit more and then you can head up to your room and call Jensen to do things I'd rather not think too much about."

With a grin Jared stood up, making sure his earlier hard-on had faded away enough for it to not be embarrassing for him to stand up and then he followed his friend across the dance floor to where a huge wedding cake was standing in the middle of a round table, people gathered around. Jared smiled when he saw the bride and the groom stand close together with a slightly over sized knife between them. When everyone was focused on the couple, Jared took his chance to send a quick _I'll call within the hour_ to Jensen before he forced himself to actually focus on the newlyweds. 

-¤-

The door closed behind him and Jared pulled his phone out of his pocket at the same time as he started peeling out of his suit, thankful that he had managed to skip out on the rest of the reception. He scrolled to Jensen's name and pressed call, looking at the innocent picture he had chosen for Jensen on the phone and it made him smile, his _jailbait_ of a boyfriend was anything but innocent after all. 

"Hey," Jensen answered quickly and Jared smiled when he heard the boy's voice. 

"You damn tease," he growled into the phone.

Jensen answered with a soft laugh that had Jared's cock hardening once more when he heard the slightly breathless tone to Jensen's voice. 

"I thought you'd appreciate some... visual aid," Jensen said and Jared was sure he could hear the smirk that must be tugging at Jensen's lips. 

Jared pushed his phone to speaker and flicked to the picture once more, looking at how fucking hot the boy looked and he pushed his already unbuttoned suit pants down and off, not caring about wrinkling them.

"Where did you take that picture, Jen?" he asked. "I'm know my own house and that was not it."

"At home," Jensen said. "While mom was making dinner and dad was setting the table."

"Fuck me," Jared groaned and the pure _wrongness_ of what Jensen was saying. "Did it turn you on? Doing something like that with your parents so close. Knowing I would see it."

"Yeah," Jensen breathed out, voice sounding husky over the phone. "I... liked it."

"I liked seeing it," Jared said. "But fuck, I was at the reception, dancing with some chick I don't even remember what she looked like. I was thinking of you before that picture and then... Christ, you're gonna be the death of me one day."

Jensen laughed again and Jared could hear arousal tinting the boy's voice, knew that Jensen's eyes would be slightly glazed over and his cheeks pink. It was a shame he didn't have the boy with him. 

"Wanna know what I did after I sent it to you?" Jensen asked with an innocent tone.

"Tell me," Jared ordered quickly.

"I had dinner with me family... and then I went over here, to take care of the dogs of course. But the thing is, your dogs just wanted to sleep. Lazy things they are."

"Jensen, god damnit," Jared groaned. "Get to the point already!"

Another low laugh came across the phone, telling Jared that his young boyfriend knew exactly what he was doing, the effect his words had on Jared.

"So I went to your room, spread myself out on your bed and used your lube to finger myself open, imagining it was your fingers," Jensen said, barely more than a whisper but it still sent shock waves of pure _want_ through Jared's body.

"Now that is a mental image I approve of," Jared said and closed his eyes to imagine what Jensen would look like spread out on Jared's bed. "But it doesn't feel as good as my fingers, does it baby? Doesn't fill you up the way I can?"

"No, Jensen moaned softly. "God, Jared, your fingers feel so much better."

Something in Jensen's voice gave it away and Jared felt his hips snap up, pushing his cotton covered cock against his fingers and quickly he got rid of his dress shirt and underwear until he was naked on the big hotel bed, cock hard and curving up against his belly. 

"Jensen," he said slowly. "Are you fingering yourself right now?"

"Yeah," Jensen answered on a soft exhale. "I'm still all slick, so open..."

"Fuck," Jared panted and wrapped his long fingers around his cock. "What are you doing right now, tell me."

He heard Jensen fumble with the phone and after a low click, Jensen's voice came back and Jared could tell right away that the boy had put his phone on speaker as well. 

"I'm on my back," Jensen breathed out. "Legs spread wide, just the way you like it."

Jared nodded even though he knew Jensen couldn't see it, could almost see the boy when he closed his eyes, imagining him spread out just like that, showing off his pretty little pink hole. 

"Are your fingers inside?" he asked, wanting more details for the image he was building in his mind.

"No," Jensen admitted. "I didn't want to, not again. Not until I had you... on the phone to..."

"To what, Jensen?"

"To tell me what to do, how to touch."

It was something Jared thought he would never get used to, the way Jensen could still sound so innocent when he talked, even though Jared knew he was anything but. When Jared himself had been the one to corrupt the young boy.

"Are your fingers slick?" he asked and waited for a low yes. "Good, then circle them around your rim, until you're all wet and relaxed."

"Already...am..." Jensen whimpered. "More..."

"Want to do more?" Jared asked and started stroking his cock with slow movements. 

"Yes, please," Jensen pleaded.

"Not yet," Jared said. "You can take more, I know you can. Now take your other hand and play with your balls... feel how heavy they are in your hand."

Jensen didn't answer, instead he heard a low, shivering moan and he was sure that Jensen did just what Jared asked of him. Arousal shot through him when he thought of Jensen, sure that the boy would soon be trembling with how good everything felt. He knew how easily Jensen fell apart with fingers up inside him and Jared's big hand fondling the smooth sac. 

"Feels good, yeah?"

"So good... Jared, so so good," Jensen moaned.

"Good good," Jared said and let his own fingers drift down to stroke down his shaft to cup his balls. "Now push the tip of your finger inside, just the tip."

"Now who's the tease?" Jensen muttered.

The sweetest moan came across the phone, telling Jared that despite his grumbling Jensen was following every order given. He didn't say anything for a long minute, just listened to his young lover's harsh breathing, imagining the way Jensen's body would be all tense in his attempts to not push down hard on the finger. 

"Want more, don't you?" Jared asked. "That's why you sent me that picture after all... Knew it would drive me fucking insane to see you like that without being able to do anything about it."

"Knew you would be... oh... _fuck_... Be like this, taking control... " Jensen mumbled.

Sometimes Jared forgot that even though he might have been the one to corrupt Jensen, the young boy knew him well enough to play him, knew just what buttons to push to make Jared loose and more than once Jensen's teasing had lead Jared to slam him against the nearest hard surface to fuck into him with hard thrusts. 

"Love you like this," Jared growled. "All needy, wanting it so much. Push that finger inside, as far as it goes."

A low, drawn out moan floated to him from the phone beside him and he knew Jensen was sliding that slick finger inside, searching for his own prostate and when Jared ordered him to fuck himself on that one finger he heard the soft moans change to a desperate, keening sound. 

"That's it, now... one more. Fuck yourself on two fingers, let them fill you up," he ordered.

The sounds turned louder at that, breathy moans and half choked cries when his boyfriend worked two slick fingers deep inside, thrusting them in and out in a way that Jared knew would look so amazing if he was there to see it. 

"How many fingers do you want, Jen?" he asked, picking up speed where he was working his own hard cock, pre-come sliding down the shaft to slick the way. 

"More..." Jensen gasped. "Three fingers... want three fingers inside me. Please, please. Can I? Jared... want it so much...."

"Remove your fingers," Jared ordered quickly.

"What? No," Jensen whined. "C'mon, don't make me stop. Don't want to..."

"Remove your fingers," "Jared repeated and he heard the soft gasp that he knew meant Jensen had obeyed. 

He heard soft pants coming from the speaker, and he thought to how wonderful those sounds were when they were gasped and moaned against his skin, accentuated by the sound of skin on skin. 

"Now get up on all fours," Jared said and he heard a small, half choked sound and some shuffling on the other end. "Are you ready?"

"Yeah... I am..." Jensen answered, sounding a bit distanced but another shuffling and Jared could hear him clearer. "Sorry, kinda pushed the phone away."

"Can't have that," Jared said with a smile. "Want to hear the sounds you make when you reach behind you and push three fingers inside. Do it."

His own hand worked the length of his cock, fingers sliding over the pre-come slicked head and when a deep groan rang out from the phone he felt his fingers clench down hard, forcing his already threatening orgasm back because he didn't want to come until Jensen was sated. 

"I wish I could see you now," Jared mumbled. "You looked so hot on that pic, that perfect ass of yours. I know the way you look now, pretty ass up in the air and fingers deep inside. Does it feel good, baby? Do you feel filled up?"

"No," Jensen whimpered. "I mean yes...it feels good, but.. _Fuck_... I don't feel full. Only feel full when... you... oh... Jesus."

Jared stilled his hand around his cock, moved his hips up to push his cock through the circle of his fingers with the same slow thrusts he would have used on Jensen to turn the boy into a writhing mess on the bed. 

"Only feel full when I what, Jensen? Tell me," Jared told the boy.

"When... mmhmm... when you fuck me," Jensen managed to get out.

Jared smiled then, imagining the boy on all fours with Jared's hard cock spreading him open, perfectly rounded ass feeling so smooth under Jared's hands and he wondered how he would manage the last few days before he got to see his young boyfriend again. 

"Want that? Want me to put you on all fours, and fuck into you?"

"Yes, god yes! Want it so much," Jensen practically sobbed, words sounding muffled like he was hiding his face against the pillow. 

"Gonna do that when I get home," Jared promised. "Spread you out on my bed and drive you insane with my tongue, my fingers on your body. Tease you until you're begging for me to fuck you hard and deep, push inside you until you can practically _taste_ me inside of you."

Another shuffling was heard and Jensen's low moans was sounding cleared over the phone line, making Jared's cock twitch against the pads of his fingers. 

"Want that, Jensen? Be put on all fours and get used?" Jared practically purred. "Or want me to put you on my lap, make you do all the work? Fuck, love the way you feel when you ride me, the way you look."

"Jared... Jared... I need to..." Jensen mumbled. "God, please. I need more... let me. Want to come. _Need_ to come."

"Let me know, "Jared said. "Let me know what it feels like to have your fingers inside you."

"It feels so good," Jensen moaned. "I'm all...oh... slick, and so warm. Wish it was more though, love... Jared, love the way you feel inside me. My fingers are good, but you.. Fuck. Your fingers when they work me open..."

Lust was soaring through Jared's body, hips pushing up and making his cock slide between his fingers with faster and faster motions as he started to chase his own orgasm at the same time as he pushed Jensen towards his.

"I love that too, love the way your tight little ass clenches around my fingers," Jared groaned. "God, the way your little hole just takes me...will never get tired of feeling you. Of fucking you."

"Yes, please. Your cock inside me, want it," Jensen pleaded. "Could come from that, just your cock inside me...always feels so good. Fucking perfect."

"Can you come from this?" Jared asked. "Your own fingers working you open, me telling you what to do?"

"Don't know," Jensen panted heavily. "Never tried... not like this."

In the distance Jensen could hear a wet, slapping sound and he clenched his eyes shut hard when he realized that he was hearing Jensen working his fingers in and out of his ass, sound of lube and skin that Jared was so familiar with. 

"Can you get up on your knees?" Jared asked. "Push up on your knees and then fuck those fingers right back inside."

Jensen didn't answer but he could hear the boy move, skin against sheets and a little whimpering sob that was drowned out by a long groan that made Jared's skin boil.

"Okay...yeah. I'm... it's harder," Jensen gasped. "But got my fingers inside now... fuck..."

The soft moans together with his own hand on his cock, the imagery of Jensen on his bed, had Jared's orgasm building already and even though he wanted it to last he knew that just wasn't an option anymore. He needed to come, needed to hear Jensen cry out his name as the boy found his climax. 

"Spread your legs, and put your other hand on your cock," Jared said, his own hand picking up speed where it was moving along his cock.

"Gonna come," Jensen whined. "Can I, Jared? Please... Let me... Need to, please please."

"Come," Jared ordered. "Wanna hear you..."

Jensen cried out, desperate sound that was so familiar to Jared that it pushed him right over the edge, painting his belly with come as he imagined Jensen's whole body arching, trapped between the fingers working his hole and the hand around his cock. 

"Jared... fuck me, god... _Jared_!”

"Jensen..." Jared called out, body shivering with his release until he was spent, whole body sinking back into the softness of the bed.

Neither of them spoke for a few long minutes, Jared only listened to Jensen's breathing slowly calming down, hitching breaths and soft moans and then the rustling of sheets when Jensen crashed down onto the bed.

"I miss you," Jensen breathed out, voice sounding deliciously fucked out.

"I miss you too," Jared admitted and even though he wasn't ready to voice that particular thought to Jensen quite yet, he looked forward to the day he would be living with Jensen.

There was no doubt in his mind that day would come. 

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen was standing in front of a group of younger boyscouts, his uniform looking as perfect as he could get it and the merit badges lining his sash felt a heavy yet comfortable weight against his skin. Lining up the guidelines for that years popcorn sale his mind kept flickering to Jared and how they had met. Some days Jensen could barely believe that four years had passed and Jared still wanted him. Their first real meeting was still clear in his mind, how nervous he had been when he rang Jared's doorbell. 

"You're supposed to focus," Richard hissed beside him. 

"I am," Jensen said flatly. "I can be good at more than one thing at the time."

"Right," Richard scoffed and Jensen bit back the urge to snap at him, instead he turned to the waiting scouts and put on his best smile.

"For some of you this will be the first year selling popcorn," he started. "We have a few prizes, but I think you all want the big one, right?"

He swept out with his arm to motion towards the shiny new bike beside him.

"It's rather awesome, trust me, I know," he smiled. "But take it from someone who has won it, it does take quite a bit of work. Just selling to your family won’t cut it..."

-¤-

"When did you get a car?"

Jensen froze with one hand reaching out to open the door and he closed his eyes, pulling in a deep breath to try and prepare himself for a discussion he really didn't want to have. He turned around to face Richard who stood staring at the big SUV Jensen was standing beside.

"And why did you get a soccer mom car?" 

"It's not my car," Jensen said shortly. "I'm just using it while the owner is out of town."

"That the guy who's dogs you’ve been watching for years?" Richard laughed. "Aren't you the best little boyscout ever? So _helpful_."

"It's Jared's car, yes," Jensen said through gritted teeth. "And at least _one_ of us is a good boyscout."

Richard froze, eyes widening in surprise, clearly not used to Jensen speaking back with such bite to his voice before. Jensen looked around quickly, making sure that none of the other scouts were close but it was only the two of them behind the main building, all others having already left. 

"You've never really spoken up to me before," Richard said, sounding very surprised.

"Maybe it was about time," Jensen said, pulling open the car door. 

Richard walked over to his own car, a small rusty thing that was held together with duct tape and good will and Jensen was surprised the other boy didn't say more.

"Guess so," Richard said and opened his own car door. "Will you get your own car soon?"

Jensen raised an eyebrow at that but as he climbed up into Jared's big car he looked to Richard once more.

"Mom and dad have hinted I might get _something_ when school starts," Jensen said, a small smile tugging at his lips. "I'm hoping it's a car."

Richard nodded, eyes traveling over the car Jensen was sitting in and there was something in his eyes that made Jensen think that maybe the boy was suspecting something but Richard just grinned slightly and shrugged.

"Maybe you're not so bad after all, when you stand up for yourself," Richard said and the next moment he closed his car door.

Jensen sat stunned for a few minutes before he reached down into his pocket for his phone at the same time as he closed the door, he quickly tapped away a message to Chris.

_Richard was being... nice. Prepare for the world to end._

Before he could even start the car, his phone vibrated and Jensen looked down at it with surprise, no way Chris would have answered him that quickly. When he opened the text he was very glad he hadn't started driving because the second the image loaded he felt his mouth go dry and his breathing catching in his throat.

  


_I came home early. Where are you?_

Jensen swallowed thickly and stared at the image and for a few long moments the only thing he heard was the roaring of his own blood in his ears. His fingers felt clumsy when they moved over the touch screen.

_I'm at the scouts. You're a bastard._

He was still trying to calm himself down some, willing his hard-on to go away, when the phone vibrated once more and his hands were sweaty when he opened the new text.

_You posted worse when I was at a wedding. When will you be home?_

Jensen's smile was so wide it hurt when his brain finally connected the text with the fact that Jared was home, and home one day early which meant that as long as no one had realized Jared was back, Jensen could stay at his place over the night without anyone wondering about it. 

_Just done, will be there in 20._

When Jared texted back it was only with the word _Good_ and Jensen decided that if it was possible, he would get back in fifteen, because he really didn't want to miss Jared any longer. He was glad the other scouts were gone, because he was being far from a role model when he sped away from the scouting lodge and steered the big car towards the town, fingers drumming restlessly against the steering wheel the entire time he drove. He was closing in on the city when his phone vibrated once more, but he refused to look at it just in case Jared was teasing him again. Jensen didn't want to get into a hard-on induced car crash just because his boyfriend was a tease after all. When he stopped at a red light and saw Chris' name on the display, he didn't even bother to open the text. 

Chris could wait. 

The neighborhood looked abandoned, the way it had been for the last few days considering most of the people were off on vacation besides the few that were still working. Jensen drove past his own home and saw none of his parent's cars so it was with a bright grin he continued until he pulled up on Jared's driveway. Even though he knew Jared was inside he saw no proof of it, and he almost fell out of the car in his eagerness to get inside. Forcing himself to walk slowly up the steps just on the off-chance someone was watching. He almost dropped the keys when he unlocked the front door and stepped into the house only to be greeted by excited barks.

He walked into the living room and was met by both Harley and Sadie nuzzling up against him but Jared was nowhere in sight and Jensen frowned. Wrestling the dogs down he walked to the kitchen but then he saw the dogs pad over to the door leading down to the basement apartment, whining softly and scratching at the door. Jensen felt slightly bad for them, but he knew Jared would have spent all time possible with them before Jensen arrived so he pushed them to the side and managed to close the door behind him, ignoring their offended huffs. 

"Jared, where are you?" he called out as he quickly walked down the steps. 

The second he got close to the door leading to the bedroom, he felt arms wrap around him and he was twisted around to face Jared. 

"Finally," Jared growled and claimed Jensen's mouth in a desperate kiss.

Jensen couldn't agree more, one week had felt like forever, and each brush of Jared's fingers over his body was sending fire through him, arousal slamming into him so hard it took his breath away. 

"Jay," he whined into the kiss, tangling his fingers into Jared's hair to pull the man closer. 

Jared didn't answer, but his hands reached down to grab at Jensen's ass, hoisting him up into the air and Jensen quickly got with the program, wrapping his legs around Jared's waist to let his boyfriend walk them into the bedroom. It was a huge turn-on that Jared could still carry him around so easily, despite the growth spurt Jensen had hit a few months earlier and when Jared pushed him down onto the bed, Jensen didn't let go of his boyfriend. He had missed Jared too much to loose contact, instead he clung even tighter and he wasn't even aware how long time passed as they lay tangled in each other, kissing until Jensen's lips felt swollen with use. 

"I've missed you so fucking much," Jared said in a rough voice when the first rush of frantic need settled down enough for them to pull apart, both gasping for air.

"Yeah," Jensen breathed out. "I've missed you so much. Slept here several nights, the sheets smell of you...”

Jared grinned then, sliding long fingers in under the now wrinkled shirt of Jensen's scout uniform.

"Gonna make it smell of _us_ ," Jared said. "Gonna fuck you until you can't walk."

The words sent a shiver of anticipation through Jensen but as much as he wanted that, wanted what Jared had talked about over the phone, he wanted something else more. Biting down on his lower lip he pushed at Jared until they were untangled from each other and Jensen moved to kneel beside his boyfriend on the bed.

"Jen?" Jared asked, confusion clear on his face.

"Let me..." was all Jensen said when he leaned in and pressed his lips against Jared's once more.

Desperation was still tinting the kiss, making the slide of lips and tongues just the right side of too rough and Jensen moaned into Jared's mouth. Jared was still only dressed in the boxers he had been wearing when he sent Jensen the picture, hard cock tenting the white fabric obscenely and it took all Jensen's willpower to not pull the garment off to wrap his lips around Jared's dick. But it had been one week since he last had Jared close and he wanted to take time, wanted to taste every inch of Jared.

He felt Jared relax into the mattress, his trust in Jensen clear in every line of his body and it made something hot and warm flutter in his belly when he let his lips slide away from Jared's. He kissed his way down his boyfriend's cheek, pressing soft kisses against his jawline before he went lower and felt the beating of Jared's pulse under his lips. 

"Jesus," Jared moaned. "You're gonna drive me insane."

Jensen smiled into his boyfriend’s skin, letting his tongue flick out stroke the sensitive skin just below Jared's ear and he felt Jared shudder at the soft touch. 

"That's part of the plan," Jensen admitted, kissing his way down Jared's shoulder.

"Tease," Jared muttered shakily.

"It's only tease..." Jensen said and lifted one hand to brush his fingers over one nipple, "...if I don't deliver..."

He let his teeth catch the softer skin on the inside of Jared's arm, sucking the blood to the surface until he was sure Jared would wear his mark for days. One big hand came up to cup the back of his head, but Jared didn't pull him away, or push him down, the hand just rested there and Jensen smiled again when he kissed his way down Jared's arm. Another shiver ran through Jared when Jensen's tongue teased the thin skin at the crease of the man's arm before he continued down further, feeling the beating of a strong pulse at the inside of Jared's wrist. 

"You're... wow... really taking your time," Jared panted.

Jensen looked up at his boyfriend, holding his gaze as he pressed soft kisses against Jared's palm before he wrapped his lips around two of Jared's fingers and sucked them deep into his mouth.

"Fuck," Jared groaned and his eyes fluttered shut.

Sucking wetly on the fingers Jensen started to unbutton his own shirt and managed to wriggle out of it without letting Jared's fingers slide from his mouth. His tongue licked over knuckles and when he pulled back he felt the man's nails catch on his lips for a second.

"You're really over dressed," Jared said when he opened his eyes and looked at Jensen. 

"I am," Jensen admitted. "I should do something about it."

He didn't say more, body buzzing with need and he didn't give himself time to put on a show, instead he quickly slid out of his clothes until he was kneeling fully naked beside Jared on the bed. Jared reached for his own boxers but Jensen reached out a hand to stop him. 

"No, I want to. Soon."

With that he leaned in and closed his lips over one nipple, feeling the hard nub against his tongue and Jared's body arched up off the bed when Jensen closed his teeth around it and tugged carefully. He loved the power he had over Jared, the way the man trembled beneath him, it made Jensen's head spin. Kissing his way over to Jared's other nipple, repeating the procedure and smiling against Jared's skin when he was rewarded but a string of low curses.

"Want more?" he asked, making his voice sound as innocent as he could manage.

Jared's gaze was dark when it locked with Jensen's, and part of him was surprise Jared hadn't just put him on all fours and fucked into him, with or without prep, considering the raw lust he saw in the man's eyes. 

"Yes," Jared gritted out. "Get on with it!"

With a smile up at his boyfriend, Jensen shifted where he was kneeling beside Jared, facing down the man's body as he leaned down to press soft kisses against Jared's skin. He felt muscles ripple under his touch when he kissed his way down Jared's stomach, tracking the panes of muscle with his lips and tongue. When he reached Jared's belly button he stopped, letting his tongue trace around it before it dipped inside and he felt Jared tremble in his attempts to stay still.

"When did you turn into such a damn tease?" Jared muttered.

Jensen looked up and grinned wide up at his boyfriend, sliding his hands down to brush the waistline of Jared's boxers. 

"Well," Jensen said. "I met you..."

Before Jared could answer, Jensen slid the garment off and took a moment to admire his boyfriend's body, miles and miles of skin stretched taut over flexing muscles. It was enough to make his mouth go dry and Jensen was trembling himself when he reached down to wrap one hand around Jared's cock. Jensen knew he was bigger than when they had first met, that he was growing up, but Jared's dick still looked impossibly big in his hand.

"Never gonna get enough of this," he mumbled. "Fucking missed having you in my mouth."

That time Jared's hand on his head _did_ push him down and Jensen went willingly, opening his mouth to wrap his lips around Jared's cock and allowing himself to slide down with one fluid motion. Jared made a sound like all the air had left his body and Jensen moaned when he had Jared's cock all the way down his throat, nose brushing against the man's sac when he wriggled to try and get it even deeper.

" _Fuck_ I love you."

Had Jensen's mouth not been so busy he would have laughed at that, instead he made a low chuckle that he knew would send vibrations through Jared's body and he was rewarded with a deep moan and Jared's fingers gripping his hair tightly. Jared let his legs fall apart, pulling his knees up and the new position made his cock push even deeper down Jensen's throat.

"Wanna..." Jared panted. "Damnit, wanna taste..."

Jensen pulled off Jared's cock, sucking the drops of pre-come into his mouth with a wet pop before he looked back up at Jared and smiled. Jared's hands drifted down to his hips and Jensen found himself lifted into position until he was on all fours above Jared, the man's cock brushing his lips at the same time as he felt Jared's breath against his ass. 

"So fucking pretty," Jared mumbled and Jensen felt fingers brush over his hole. 

Looking down he made a split decision and moved down slightly before moving his hands down under Jared's thighs and tugging slightly. Jared seemed to understand what he wanted but the man still gave a slightly surprised sound before he pulled his legs up further, exposing himself to Jensen completely.

Jensen could understand the man's surprise, it wasn't something they did often and it had never been like _this_ before, but he wanted it. Carefully he let his tongue trace down the man's sac, feeling the heavy weight against his tongue for a moment before he continued further down, licking over sensitive skin before his tongue found the tightly puckered skin.

"Christ," Jared muttered and the next second Jensen felt big hands on his ass.

Hot breath brushed against him when Jared spread him open and a wet tongue licked over his hole. With a pleased moan Jensen mirrored the gesture, tasting Jared with the tip of his tongue and soon everything around them had drifted away until all he could think of was how Jared relaxed beneath him. He let his tongue circle over the rim, getting it wet and relaxed before he craned his neck to seal his lips tightly over the hole and sucking. 

Jared's fingers dug hard into his ass, sharp stings of pain when Jared's nails dug into his skin and Jensen moaned once more, stabbing his tongue against Jared's opening at the same time as he sucked once more. His tongue wriggled inside at the same time as Jared's tongue pushed into his own ass, licking the tight muscle from the inside and the dual sensation of Jared around his tongue and himself around Jared's was enough to drag a low keening sound from him. The only sound filling the room was the wet slid of tongues against skin, mingled with moans as pleasure coursed through them. It was beyond anything Jensen had felt before, something so strangely intimate that he couldn't understand why they hadn't done it before. 

He pulled back slightly to look down at Jared, seeing the hole slightly open and shining wetly with Jensen's spit. With a moments hesitation Jensen moved one hand down, letting one finger brush the hole before he lifted it to his mouth and sucked it in, getting it dripping wet. Jared's tongue was still working at spreading him open, alternating between pushing deep inside or licking over the rim in a way that made Jensen feel like every nerve ending in his body was connected straight to his cock. He tried to gather himself some as he pulled his fingers out from his mouth and lowered it to touch Jared's hole once more. He saw the muscle flex and clench at the touch but before he could change his mind he slowly pushed the finger inside.

Jared went completely still beneath him and Jensen was just about to pull back, to say he was sorry, when Jared groaned and his hips moved to push Jensen's finger even deeper inside. 

"Fuck, fuck, _fuck_ ," Jared gasped out. "Jensen... do it, want you to."

That was all Jensen wanted to hear and he pushed a second finger inside, feeling Jared's hole tight around his fingers. Jared's body was suddenly in constant motion beneath him, muscles flexing as he practically rode Jensen's fingers and his tongue worked Jensen's hole with eager thrusts. He knew then his fingers found that spot inside his boyfriend, because the man's body arched beneath him, almost enough to push him off had Jared's big hands not held him in place. Jensen moaned and leaned in once more, letting his tongue lick around where his fingers were working their way into Jared's body with deep thrusts. Despite Jared not touching his cock, only that tongue pushing in and out of his body, Jensen could feel his orgasm start to build. Pleasure coiling up his spine so strong that it made his toes curl and he let his fingers brush over Jared's prostate time and time again before he shifted so that he could finger fuck his boyfriend at the same time as he let his lips close around Jared's cock once more.

The first spurt of pre-come on his tongue was enough for his own orgasm to tear through him, making him moan around the cock that was pushing deep into his mouth and his fingers pushed all the way into Jared with one hard thrust. He could feel, could hear, he own come painting Jared's chest with white, some of it hitting his own belly, and he sucked hard on Jared's cock to hold back the scream that wanted to leave him. 

Suddenly Jared's mouth fell away from his body and the man's fingers dug into his skin once more, the only warning he got before salty come flooded his mouth. Jensen felt Jared's body spasm around his fingers, inner walls working him with each hard pulse of come that shot straight down his throat because Jared's cock was lodged so deep in his mouth. He swallowed thickly around Jared, not letting a single drop get away and not pulling away until Jared groaned and pushed at him. His legs felt weak when he almost fell to the side, collapsing on the bed next to Jared and for a moment they just lay panting for air before Jensen sat up and looked down at his boyfriend.

The man's strong body was covered with a thin sheen of sweat, chest still heaving with deep breaths and even though he felt completely spent Jensen could feel his cock twitch, straining to get hard again. Jensen reached out to drag one finger through his own come where it was glistening on Jared's chest and Jared's gaze snapped to him, gaze dark when Jensen lifted the fingers to lick them clean with a low moan.

"Well I'll be damned," Jared said and his voice sounded completely wrecked.

"Good?" Jensen asked, still a bit hesitant over what they had done.

"Beyond fucking good," Jared said and reached out to tug Jensen down against him.

Jensen wrinkled his nose slightly when he felt his own cooling come where it smeared between their bodies and Jared laughed softly.

"It's okay to lick it from your own fingers, but not okay to feel it like this?" he asked.

Jensen just shrugged but smiled slightly when Jared pulled him into a deep kiss. Jensen could taste himself on Jared's tongue, and knew Jared could taste himself on his and they kept on kissing until they only tasted like _them._

"I wasn't sure... I mean," Jensen started before he swallowed thickly.

"That I would like it?" Jared asked and Jensen nodded. "I fucking loved it. Christ Jensen, your tongue... your _fingers_ inside me. So damn good."

Jensen smiled at that, a wave of pride washing over him at Jared's praise but what they had just done had awoken a question within him and he bit down on his lip before he pushed himself up again to look down at Jared.

"I... well, I wondered... Have you ever..." he said, struggling to find the words. "Bottomed?"

"No," Jared answered easily. "Not once. I've never really felt the urge for it."

"Oh," Jensen said and was just about to lay down again, swallowing down the disappointment.

"But I would for you," Jared said then. "I've thought about it... and yeah... I can see myself doing it with you some day."

-¤-


	9. The Reversed Roles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After so many years together, insecurities can still get between them. But even when growing up and changing, some things remain the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Underage, age difference (Jensen 17, Jared 28)

-¤-

Jensen sighed and pushed his pencil around the desk, sliding it from one corner to the other and then back again. At the front of the classroom the teacher was talking but he wasn't listening, not really. Instead he pushed the pencil to the middle of the desk and started spinning it around, time and time again until it fell off the desk and clattered to the floor. 

"Having fun?" Chris mumbled at his side and Jensen looked over at his best friend.

"So much fun," he said as he leaned down to retrieve his pencil, ignoring the dark look the teacher sent him.

"You know you can be a pissy little bitch at times," Chris said, even lower than before. "Did Jared stop putting out?"

Even though he knew that the words were spoken too quietly for anyone to hear, Jensen couldn't stop himself from quickly looking around the classroom before he glared daggers at his best friend. 

"Chris!" he hissed out before Mr. Morgan cleared his throat pointedly and they both had to focus back on the lecture.

Jensen's brain wasn't very good at focusing though, he was too busy thinking of what Chris had said. It wasn't so much that Jared had stopped putting out, but his boyfriend had been swamped with work due to people calling in sick and Jensen simply missed him. A lot. And Chris had found a girlfriend, no longer able to keep Jensen company all the time like Jensen really wanted him to but he figured at least one of them should get laid. He was just really used to that person being him. 

"You know, you do need to..."

Chris' words were cut out by someone knocking on the door and the class all went silent and turned to look at what had interrupted their rather boring lesson. Mr. Morgan walked over to open the door and then he smiled and motioned the person on the other side in. Curious eyes locked down on the boy stepping inside, brown hair falling messily down his forehead, not long enough to hide the brown eyes that looked back at the class and Jensen felt bad for him when he saw the splotches of bright red on the boy's cheeks when the teacher pushed him to stand in front of the class.

"Class, this is Benjamin Barnes," Mr. Morgan said. "He just transferred here from...oh, what was it now again?"

"Uhm...Sutton, London," the boy answered.

Jensen heard a low _huh_ from beside him but he didn't bother looking over to Chris, instead he looked at the boy at the front of the class with even more interest, it was the first time they had a transfer from outside of the US and Jensen was curious about the boy. 

"That's right, an English gentleman," Mr. Morgan said and Jensen felt the urge to sink through the floor at those words, he didn't even want to know how Benjamin felt. "Care to tell the class a bit about yourself?"

If Jensen would guess, he was pretty sure that the answer to that was _please no_ but the boy only nodded and cleared his throat softly before he spoke. 

"Hello. I'm Ben, please, don't call me Benjamin. My father got work here so, well. Here I am. I'm from London so...and I love books, and nature. Even though we didn't have much of that in London. My family use to camp a lot though and... yeah. I guess that's me."

Jensen perked up at that, sitting straighter in his chair and steadfastly ignored Chris' groan beside him, he was too exited about the prospect about having someone to talk nature life with, Chris might be his best friend but the boy had a tendency to tune Jensen out whenever he started talking about scout things. 

"Right. If you sit down with...well, I guess you can sit with Jensen and Chris since they have a spot free at their table."

Ben nodded and walked towards the seat next to Jensen when Mr. Morgan pointed it out to him, throwing Jensen a small smile when he moved to the side slightly to make room.

"Welcome," Jensen said in a low tone and Chris echoed the greeting.

"Thank you," Ben said softly, cheeks still tainted pink. 

"I'm Jensen, that's Chris," Jensen explained. "Do you have any books?"

Ben shook his head and looked around the classroom once more before extracting a pencil and a notebook from his messenger bag.

"Figured not, you can share with me," Jensen said and for the first time that class, he opened the text book and pushed it closer to Ben, actually trying to focus on what Mr. Morgan was saying.

-¤-

"Hello," Ben said and flopped down on the free spot between Alona and Jake.

"Hey," they all greeted the boy who had slotted so perfectly into their little group since he had arrived one week earlier.

Katie glared at Alona and Jensen would have found it amusing had he not just been relieved that the girl had finally found someone new to obsess about instead of clinging on to the hope that he would ask her out. He did feel slightly bad for her though because he had a hunch that Ben would never be interested in Katie, no matter how pretty the girl was. 

"Is anyone _not_ coming this year?" Alona said and looked around the table.

"Coming to what?" Ben asked curiously. 

"The winter formal, I'm sure you seen the posters about it?" Alona asked, not waiting for Ben to answer. "It's _the_ best dance of the season but I know _some_ people are planning an excuse. Again."

A sharp elbow to his side made Jensen look from where he had mostly been focusing on his phone, reading through the texts that Jared had sent him the last night.

"This feels slightly déjà vu," he mumbled and Chris snorted beside him.

"Are you coming to the winter formal this year?" Alona asked. "It's our _last_ one, you need to be there. You've already skipped out the last _two_ years!"

Looking down at the phone in his hand, reading the last text from Jared where his boyfriend said he would be working the weekend Jensen did consider it for a moment, but then he shook his head. 

"No," he said. "I'm sorry but... No."

"Why not?" all but Chris asked as once just as Jensen's phone started vibrating in his hand.

Without a second thought Jensen was up and off the table, throwing Chris a pleading look and his friend nodded and made a small eye roll at the phone. 

"Leave Jensen be," Chris said. "Let's talk about how to dress New Kid up for the theme instead."

Jensen saw Ben pale slightly but then all his focus was back on his phone and he quickly walked away at the same time as he answered the phone.

"Jared," he breathed out, barely more than a whisper.

"Are people around?" Jared asked. "I mean, can you talk?"

"I just left the cafeteria," Jensen said. "There's no-one here."

"Good, because I really needed to hear your voice," Jared said and the honesty in his voice had Jensen smiling as he snuck into an abandoned classroom. "It really sucks working this much but you know how it is, Christmas shopping have started and with people sick someone has to take care of this place."

"I know," Jensen said. "But it does suck."

"It really does," Jared admitted. "Just, talk to me for a few minutes, Jen? Before I have to go back to the madhouse that is my job."

Jensen sat down on a desk, pulling his legs up to rest on one chair and he told Jared about his school, about the latest scout meeting, about Ben and about the winter formal, all if stuff he hadn't mentioned in all the texts they had shared over the last week. 

"Are you _sure_ you don't want to go?" Jared asked and Jensen could hear the heavy sigh from the other end. 

It was a discussion they had so many times before: Jared pushing him towards what he considered typical teenage activities and Jensen trying to make his boyfriend understand how little those things meant when he couldn't have Jared there to share it all with. 

"Jared," Jensen said, eyes riveted on the door to make sure non one came inside and over heard the conversation. "I'm not going, they can entertain themselves with pairing up Ben and not me."

"Right," Jared said. "Except for how I'm working late, since we have extra long opening hours due to the Christmas Market this weekend. So there is no need for you to sit at home, you _will_ go to this formal. And you _will_ go to prom this spring as well."

Jensen opened his mouth to protest but Jared was clearly not having any of it, he continued talking over Jensen's half-assed protests. 

"Jensen, I _love_ you, but I will not allow you to miss out on this," Jared said. "But I would... prefer if you went stag."

That had Jensen laughing and he nodded despite the fact that he knew Jared couldn't see it, the words were oddly comforting.

"I won't go with anyone," he said softly. "The first time I go on a real date with someone, I want it to be with you."

"I like the sound of that," Jared said with a laugh. "Now you just need to become legal. Until then, go help your friends set... what's his name? Ben? Up with... what was that girl who tried to get you to go with her last year?"

"Katie," Jensen said, surprised Jared even remembered. "I don't think that'll happen, pretty sure Ben swings the other way."

Steps just outside of the door had Jensen lose track of the conversation and he quickly told his boyfriend goodbye, managing to end the call just before the door was opened and Mr. Morgan stepped inside with a raised eyebrow.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared stared down at the telephone in his hand, Jensen's quick _love you_ still ringing in his ears but it did nothing to settle the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. It wasn't like he hadn't thought before of someone Jensen's own age becoming interested in the boy. Hell, if he wasn't sure Jensen would stop putting out for him even thinking about it Jared would say that the Richard kid Jensen so often complained about probably had a thing for Jensen. But Jensen hated Richard. He clearly didn't hate Ben.

"Fuck it," Jared groaned and dropped the phone down on his desk.

Just then he heard a knock on the door to the small office before the door was pushed open and he found himself face to face with Kristen who looked between him and the discarded phone on the table.

"The mysterious boyfriend of yours?" she asked, sounding slightly amused.

"What do you want, Kristen?" he asked, pushing the phone aside.

"Right, not talking about that," Kristen said with an eye roll that made Jared question his choice of employing one of his closest friends in the first place. "We have quite a few costumers, think you could help me at the counter? No one can soothe grumpy costumers like you can, Jay."

Jared nodded and followed her out into the main part of the store, glass counters full of the finest deli products he had managed to find and despite the emotions whirling around inside of him he managed to relax some at the familiar scent of the store.

It wasn't until they were closing up, wrapping hams up and storing away cheeses, that Kristen started prodding once more and he was actually surprised that she had lasted that long to begin with.

"You've been with this guy for _years_ ," Kristen said. "I don't understand why I don’t get to meet him."

"Kristen," Jared sighed, reaching for a cloth to wipe clean the counters. "I will tell you, in time. Now is not that time."

His friend looked at him for a long time before she pressed her lips together and spun around on her heel and reached behind her own back to untie the black apron with their white and gold logo on it. 

"You know," she said conversationally. "If I find out you _should_ have told me about him, I will hurt you."

Jared smiled, the first real smile since he had talked to Jensen and even though he knew it might cost him an arm he reached out to ruffle her blond hair. 

"I know, Kristen, I know."

"I just can't believe you told _Chad_ and not me," she complained when Jared closed down the lights of the store. "I mean really Jay. Chad?"

Instead of answering her, Jared pulled on his heavy winter jacket and warm gloves before pushing the door open, letting the both of them outside. 

"Wait, you didn't _tell_ Chad," Kristen exclaimed. "He found out, because your boyfriend spends time at your place. Oh Jared, you _need_ to invite me over, I need to see him."

"You have," Jared said before he could stop himself, thinking back to the time so many years ago when Jensen and his fellow boy scouts had sold nuts at the mall.

Kristen stopped dead in her tracks before spinning around, almost tripping over in the slushy snow.

"I have?" she asked. "When? Jared, when did I meet him?"

Jared ignored her in favor of locking the door and pulling down the metal bars that protected the deli at night but he knew that she wouldn't give in so easily.

"You will find out, start of summer. I promise," he said and turned around to face her.

Kristen had been one of his closest friends for years and keeping Jensen from her was painful, but even though he thought he could get her on his side it wasn't something he was willing to risk, he and Jensen were already balancing a fine line and it wasn't something he would put at risk. But his friend wasn't stupid and he could see the wheels turn in her head for a long time before her eyes went wide.

"Start of summer," she said. "When the schools end... Jared..."

He squeezed his eyes shut, willing her to not go on and by some miracle she went silent for a while before he felt the light brush of her hand against his. 

"I will not ask more details, but why are you upset today? This... person has always made you happy, what has changed?" she asked as they made their way to the end of the street where Jared's car was parked. 

"He's been talking about someone," Jared said quietly. "Someone that might give him something that I can't and I... damnit..."

-¤-

The next day he could feel Kristen's eyes on him far too often than he liked to think about and when he walked into the storage room he could hear her follow despite the fact that it left the store un-manned for a few minutes.

"Kristen," he said before she had managed to bring up the previous day's discussion once more.

"I just..." she started but then she swallowed. "Okay. Fine. I get it."

To his combined relief and surprise Kristen didn't say anything else, instead she reached out and stroked one finger down his cheek and walked back out into the store with Jared on her heel. The store was slow for the first time in days, and Jared leaned forward against the counter, stretching his back and groaning quietly at the relief of it. He didn't need to look up to know that Kristen was looking at him again and he knew that the quiet from the storage room had only been to lull him into a false sense of security, no way that his friend had given up.

"Jay," she said when the small deli was surprisingly empty for once. "It's really calm now, I insist that   
you go out for lunch today."

Jared looked up, one eyebrow raised and he could tell right away by her firm gaze there really was no point in arguing but Jared was nothing if not stubborn so of course he did argue anyway.

"I'm not sure you have realized this, but I am your boss, not the other way around," Jared pointed out.

Kristen just rolled her eyes at him before pointing with one hand towards the door, firm set to her jaw.

"Get out of here," she ordered. "You can go be social with that secret boyfriend of yours for once, Cindy is coming in thirty, I can hold down the fort until then."

"Kristen," Jared sighed, a low warning note to his voice that he seemed to use a lot lately.

"No," his friend answered. "I may not know much but I know that you're miserable, so go see him. Be social. Get in a quickie during lunch for all I care but _please_ , leave the store. It's driving me insane to have you here all the time."

Opening his mouth to protest Jared realized that it was closing in on two weeks with nothing more than phone calls from Jensen, two weeks of missing his boyfriend so much it drove him insane. He needed to see Jensen, needed to have his boyfriend's lips against his own so that he could put to rest all the fears of not being enough, not being what Jensen needed.

"I'll go," Jared said and pushed away from the counter. "But only if you promise to call me in if anything happens that you need me for, and only if you promise to _not_ ask about him again for the rest of the week.”

"Deal!" Kristen said, too quickly for Jared's taste but he was already finding himself practically pushed outside without any chance to protest.

Walking to the car he felt a small smile tug at his lips, whatever worries he might have he was sure it would feel better soon and he revved the engine before setting course towards Jensen's school. Stopping in the parking lot he reached for his phone, searching out the hidden corner where he had Jensen's schedule and smiling wide when he realized that the boy should be getting out in no more than five minutes, for once it seemed like the universe actually was on his side. He was just about to send off a text when the front door to the school opened and Jensen stepped outside, heavy coat sitting perfectly on his body and a deep green scarf wrapped around his neck. A smile spread on Jared's face at the sight of his boyfriend, but the next second he could feel it fading away.

Just behind Jensen came a dark haired boy who Jared had never seen before and it didn't take a genius to figure out that it must be the Ben-person that Jensen had been talking about. The Ben-person that would be at the school dance with Jensen when Jared couldn't be. The Ben-person that was looking at _his_ boyfriend with clear longing in his eyes.

A sour taste rose in Jared's throat but he forced it down, swallowing a few times to try and calm himself down but his hand was holding on the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white and he was almost scared he would crush the phone in his other hand. It was one thing to know that there must be people out there, people Jensen's own age, that he could have been with, would have been with had Jared not picked up that phone all those years ago, but it was another thing to see it with his own eyes. His traitorous brain painted several vivid pictures in his mind of Jensen with this boy, holding hands while walking down the street, just like Jared never had been able to do. A flicker of mental images showed them doing more than that and Jared cursed low under his breath, forcing the irritation away. He was there for a reason after all and suddenly there was nothing he wanted more than take Jensen away from the boy that stood beside him.

Jared started typing out a message but before he could send it off he could see Jensen notice him, eyes zeroing in on Jared's big car and within a moment Jensen said something quickly to the boy at his side before making his way across the parking lot and towards Jared. Jensen opened the passenger door and slid inside with one nervous look back towards the school where Jared could see Ben look their way with a small frown on his face before turning away and walking away.

"Jared!" Jensen exclaimed the second the door was closed behind him. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you, "Jared admitted, turning to face his boyfriend. "We barely have any time anymore but work was slow so I decided to take a long break, to spend some time with you during your lunch break."

Jensen was smiling wide, green eyes sparkling and all Jared's fears and worries were pushed away in favor of taking in the beauty that was Jensen. Looking around Jensen ducked in quickly to press his lip to Jared's, the briefest of pecks before he pulled back and smiled at Jared.

"Best plan in a long while," he said. "Do we have time to go to your place? It's a bit more private than the school parking lot after all."

"We're taking time," Jared said firmly and started the engine once more. "I have some lasagna leftovers we could heat up if you want?"

"Oh Jay," Jensen said with a smile. "You sure know how to woo a boy."

The words were like needles, piercing sharp and hard but Jared didn't say anything, pushed it all down in favor of taking Jensen home, of _wooing_ him the very best he could.

-¤-

With food in his belly and Jensen tucked close to his body some of Jared's fears and worries had drained away and he relished in the fact that Jensen was _right there_ , his soft hair brushing against Jared's cheek when the boy shifted even closer.

"I got class soon again," Jensen said with a sigh.

"I know," Jared said but instead of standing up he wrapped both his arms around Jensen and despite Jensen not being the small and slender boy he had been when they first met, Jared was still strong enough to easily shift his boyfriend until he had a lap full of Jensen. "What if I don't wanna let you go?"

Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's neck and leaned in for a soft kiss, their lips slotting together perfectly in that way that always made Jared think he could spend the rest of his life just kissing his boyfriend.

"Aren't you supposed to be my role model or something?" Jensen asked. "You're not supposed to encourage me to skip class."

"There's a lot of things I'm not _supposed_ to do," Jared pointed out, letting his hands slide down Jensen's back to cup the boy's ass in a firm grip.

With a laugh Jensen leaned in for another long kiss before he pulled back, sliding off Jared's lap with a small pout on his full lips.

"Trust me, I _really_ wish I could stay here but I got school, and you’ve got work," he said. "But maybe we can find some time together this weekend?"

Jared nodded and got up as well, willing his hard-on to go away but he was pretty sure that wouldn't happen as long as Jensen was close to him, the boy's fingers tangling with his as they moved to get their heavy winter clothes back on. They didn't speak on the way back to school, but Jensen's hand was tangled with his the entire drive, both of them needing the contact that they had been without.

"So, this weekend?" Jensen asked when Jared parked the car half a block from the school.

"You have the dance," Jared reminded the boy. "But maybe come Sunday? If you can manage to get away from your family, I can see if Cindy or maybe the new kid, Brian, wants an extra shift and we could spend some time just the two of us. Some longer time…"

"Dance, right," Jensen said with a small grin. "Ben flat out refused to ask Katie to it, that girl just can't catch a break. I'll make sure I don't have too much spiked punch, don't want my Jared-time ruined by a nasty hangover after all."

"You're not going with someone, right?" Jared asked and he wanted to cringe away at the tone in his own voice.

Jensen looked over with one raised eyebrow before smiling softly and his hand clamped down on Jared's quickly, too much people around for either of them to dare a kiss.

"You're sort of cute when you're possessive," Jensen said with a smile. "But I'm not going with anyone, Ben will pick me up and we can be the odd boys out, making fun of all the misfit couples, it'll be fun. Thank you for lunch, Jay, I needed this."

With one last squeeze of his hand Jensen slid out of the car and made his way towards the school, one quick glance back over his shoulder and a brilliant smile before he rounded the corner and was out of sight. Jared wanted to say he felt better, but knowing that Ben was picking up Jensen had made a hard weight settle in his belly. It sounded all too much like a date in his mind to be comforting.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen spun around in front of the mirror, taking in his own appearance in the white suit and the icy blue shirt underneath. He had his doubts about the color but he had to give the girls credit, it did fit him and he was vain enough to like the fact that he most likely would stand out, even with the Frost-theme making people dress in slightly brighter colors. He twirled the spray bottle with hair glitter in his hands, hesitating for a few moments but they had all promised to use it and the girls would never forgive him if he chickened out so he closed his eyes and sprayed a liberal amount of the glitter into the spikes of his carefully gelled hair. The glitter caught the light perfectly and he couldn't hold back a smile at the look, it was much more frosty than he had expected it to be. The ring of his cell phone interrupted his admiration of himself and after sticking his tongue out at his reflection as he reached out for the phone, smiling when he saw Jared's name on the display.

"Hey," he said softly. "I wasn't sure you would have time to call."

From the other end of the line he could hear the background noise of what was clearly a lot of people in the store, and he wasn't surprised, the Christmas market seemed to become more and more popular for each year that passed by.

"They can manage without me for five minutes," Jared answered. "You're more important anyway."

Jensen felt his cheeks burn and when he glanced over at the mirror he saw them turning slightly pink.

"I'm all dressed up for the dance," Jensen told his boyfriend. "I even got _glitter_ in my hair."

"That doesn't sound like you," Jared laughed. "One of the girls decided that?"

"Alona," Jensen explained. "She's small but… you don't tell her no if you value your own life. Even Chris promised to use the glitter."

"Now that is something I would pay to see," Jared said with a chuckle.

"I promise to take pictures," Jensen laughed. "I might even make someone take pictures of _me_ , I mean… if   
that's something you think you'd like."

"Always," Jared said quickly, his voice turning softer and lower. "I hope you have a good time tonight, and I wish I could be there with you."

Ignoring the risks of wrinkles Jensen sank down on his bed, switching the phone from one ear to the other.

"I wish that as well," he said with a soft sigh, despite seeing Jared the day before he missed his boyfriend all the time. "But you'll have a lot to do at work, you'll barely have time to think of me. And Ben was nice enough to promise to keep me entertained."

To his surprise the answer was a low scoffing that made Jensen frown, the simple sound was more bitter than he had expected a sound could be.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," Jared answered in a tone that made it very clear that it was _something_ alright.

"Jay?" Jensen prodded. "Tell me."

"I'm just not very surprised that the kid wants to keep you _entertained_ ," Jared said in a hard, almost venomous, tone.

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Jensen asked.

"Oh c'mon," Jared said, annoyance dripping with every word. "You can't be so blind that you haven't noticed how that boy looks at you."

The condescending tone made Jensen grit his teeth together and he pushed himself up off the bed once more. All the warmth and comfort he had felt at hearing Jared's voice drained away and he paced back and forth across the floor, waiting for the man to explain himself.

"I saw him when I was picking you up the other day, the way he looks at you," Jared said angrily. "It's quite fucking obvious why he refused to ask Katie out."

"What, so he can't be friends with me without wanting to fuck me?" Jensen snapped.

"That's not what I said," Jared snarled. "I just think you should stop being so naive and think about this for awhile."

Pain stabbed through him at those words and he clenched his teeth together, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm himself down.

"So you think I'm naive?" he asked quietly. "What, I'm too much of a kid to realize what's happening? Ben is a _friend_ , I'm allowed to have those. I don't need to ask you for permission."

"No, but you could at least check with me before you go on a _date_ with someone else," Jared said. "I mean really, grow up and see what's right in front of you."

Swallowing thickly Jensen closed his eyes in an attempt to stop the tears but he didn't know what to say, not until the anger boiled up red hot inside of him.

"All these years and you've never made me feel like a kid," he said through gritted teeth. "Not until now. So fuck you, Jared. Fuck you for objecting to me having a friend and fuck you for making me feel bad about doing the stuff _all_ teenagers do. You were the one pushing for me to go to this damn dance to begin with!"

"Jensen..." Jared started but Jensen didn't want to listen to any excuses, any explanations.

"I'm gonna go to the dance, I'm gonna have fun and I'm going to do it with Ben," he said angrily. "Don't call me again."

He ended the call, cutting off Jared calling his name and it didn't take many seconds before it was ringing once more. Jensen quickly turned the phone off and dropped it to the bed, taking several deep breaths and blinking rapidly to try and stop the tears that were fighting to well over. In the end he didn't know how long he stood there looking at the turned off phone on his bed, like he was somehow expecting it to ring no matter what, only looking away when the door bell announced Ben's arrival.

-¤-

Music was blaring so loud that he could barely hear his own thoughts and each time Ben wanted to say something he leaned in so close that Jensen expected to feel lips against his ear. Something with the intimacy of that gesture made him want to pull away but he forced himself to stay in place, telling himself that he was only imagining things because of what Jared had said.

"You don't seem to be enjoying yourself," Ben called out, shifting closer to Jensen. 

"I'm just gonna..." Jensen said and pushed away from the table, grabbing his empty cup and making a beeline for the punch table.

"You two seem... cosy."

Jensen glared at Chris who had sidled up next to him, his hair more full of glitter than anyone else and he wondered if his best friend had overdone it just to prove a point.

"We're not..." Jensen said with a sigh and lifted his now full cup to his lips, wincing slightly at the taste.

"I'm sure you're not," Chris said and pulled Jensen with him to a side door, stepping out into the open air outside, where the music was only background sound. "Why are you even here?"

Jensen drained what was left in the cup before he threw it into the trashcan standing outside the door and then he leaned against the wall with a deep sigh.

"Because Jared told me to go," he said quietly. "

"Huh," Chris said. "Didn't think he would... okay then. More punch?"

"Yes please," Jensen said, even something as vile as the spiked punch was better than thinking too much about Jared. 

Chris nodded and disappeared inside and Jensen fished his phone out of his pocket, it was still turned off and he was just about to turn it back on when the door opened again. He turned around to say something to Chris but instead he found Ben standing there, a small smile on his lips and he walked over to stand beside Jensen, stretching out against the wall. 

"I wondered where you had gone to," Ben said, tilting his head to the side and watching Jensen.

"Just needed some fresh air," Jensen responded.

"You know, I'm happy we moved here," Ben said. "I like this country, and I kinda like this school. But most of all? I really like you."

Before Jensen could react to that he found himself pushed up against the wall, with Ben pressing a soft kiss to his lips. The tenderness of the kiss made Jensen's head spin and for a few long moments he found himself frozen in place while Ben's tongue brushed over his lips, searching access. The second his brain caught up with what was happening though he pushed the other boy away.

"What the fuck?" he gasped and swiped over his lips with the back of his hand.

"I was just about to ask the same," Chris said from the door and when Jensen spun around to face his friend he saw the boy's eyes locked on Ben. "I'm pretty sure I told you that you should stop pining, 'cause Jensen was taken."

Ben made a low huffing sound at that, his gaze turning back to Jensen and he took a step closer, smiling softly.

"I know but, c'mon Jen, you agreed to come here with me," he said. "And you spent most of the evening with me."

"As a friend!" Jensen pointed out. "I’ve got a boyfriend!"

"What? No," Ben said. "You can tell me the truth, I know that's just an excuse to not have the girls meddling so much."

Chris sighed and rolled his eyes before pulling Jensen's phone from where he was still holding it in his slack hands, letting it slide into Jensen's pocket before he dropped it. Jensen stared at Ben in disbelief and his cheeks burned with shame when he realized how _stupid_ he had been to not see what was right in front of him.

"I’ve got a boyfriend," he repeated. "It's complicated but he's very, very real. And I love him."

Ben paled at that and took a step back, hands in the air in a surrendering gesture.

"Shit, I didn't... I thought Chris was just protecting you," Ben said quickly. "I mean... yeah. I'll just go. Can we... can this not have happened?"

He disappeared back into the gym building, burst of sound finding its way outside before the door slammed shut behind him and it was only Jensen and Chris standing outside, Chris with a big cup in one hand, he held it out to Jensen.

"That's why I was surprised Jared wanted you to go to the dance," Chris explained. "It's quite obvious that pretty boy was carrying a torch for you after all."

Jensen looked to where Ben had disappeared and for the first time he realized that the fact that Ben was good looking had never even crossed his mind, it just wasn't something he had seen.

"You truly didn't even notice, did you?" Chris said with a laugh and took a swig from the cup when Jensen didn't reach out to take it. "You're so fucking _gone_ for Jared."

"Jared," Jensen said. "Oh shit."

Without another word he turned around and started running away from the school, the only thought in his mind to find Jared and asking forgiveness for being an oblivious idiot. Jared's words might have hurt but Jensen clearly _was_ naive enough to miss something that everyone else had noticed. Somewhere behind him he heard Chris call out his name but Jensen didn't answer, he only picked up his speed and he was sure Chris would understand it.

It took too long to get to Jared's place and despite the cold air outside Jensen was sweating by the time he turned onto the right street. His own house was dark, both his siblings being away with friends and his parents out for a late night dinner and movie but Jensen barely spared a glance before he closed the distance to Jared's house, hoping no one saw him. Deep inside he couldn't bring himself to care either way. He ignored the front door, favoring the seldom used side door that he hadn't felt the need to use since people had found out he was Jared's dog sitter. He fished his keys out from his pocket and for a moment he hesitated, but then he quickly unlocked the door and stepped inside. 

"Jensen?"

Looking up he saw Jared on the couch, phone in one hand and Jensen had no doubts that the man had just been calling him. His hand fell down to his pocket where the phone was still turned off. All the bravado, the determination that had lead him to Jared's place drained away when he saw his boyfriend unfold his long limbs from the couch and step closer, one hesitant step at the time. 

"I'm..." Jensen started and then swallowed thickly, unable to get the words out. 

"I'm so sorry," Jared said, stopping a few feet away from Jensen. "I never meant to make you feel bad, that was a horrible thing to say."

Jensen's own apologies got stuck on his tongue and he saw Jared's gaze flicker away in hesitation. In all the years they had been together he had never seen Jared that unsure of himself before, and it made something inside of Jensen ache with the need to make things better again. 

"I love you," Jared went on before Jensen could gather himself together enough to speak. "And I don't want you any other way, I never think of you as a kid. I know you're not, I just let my jealousy..."

"You were right," Jensen interrupted when he found his voice again. 

Jared fell silent, lips still slightly parted and he blinked at Jensen a few times before he shook his head like he was trying to clear his mind. 

"I was... wait... what?" he said, sounding confused.

"You were right," Jensen repeated. "About Ben. He was... I mean, he wanted... He kissed me."

He had expected Jared to be angry, to curse and yell at him or even to push him away, what he didn't expect was to find himself suddenly slammed up against the wall, Jared's hand pulling his own up, pinning them against of the wall above Jensen's head.

"No one is allowed to kiss you but _me_ ," Jared growled. "You belong to me, you're mine to kiss, mine to touch. Mine to _love_."

The next second Jared's mouth covered his with a desperation that they seldom experienced, tongue prying his lips apart and Jensen moaned into the kiss, arching his body closer to Jared's but not fighting the man's grips on his hands.

"Did you like it?" Jared asked darkly when he pulled back. 

"No," Jensen breathed out. "I hated it."

"Good," Jared said and kissed him again, the kiss much softer that time and he released the grip on Jensen's hands. "I'm so so sorry I hurt you."

"I'm sorry I didn't believe you," Jensen mumbled. "I'm... I just didn't see it. I only... Damnit Jared, since I was twelve, I've only seen you."

At that Jared too a step back, looking at Jensen who felt blood heat his cheeks at the admission to how much Jared meant to him but then he saw his boyfriend smile, a brilliant smile that made his dimples cut deep dents into his cheeks 

"Jensen," Jared said and there was a tone of awe in his voice that Jensen never had heard before. 

"So, we've both been idiots," Jensen smiled and lifted his hands to tangle in Jared's hair, soft strands sliding between his fingers. "Forgive me?"

"I think I can," Jared said. "Just... don't let any more brats kiss you."

Jensen laughed and pulled his boyfriend down into a deep kiss, licking his way into Jared's mouth with eager swipes of his tongue, relishing in the taste he felt like he had missed for weeks. Heat rose in Jensen's belly and he pressed closer to Jared's strong body, tugging at his clothes without really thinking about it.

"Jen," Jared laughed against his lips. "I haven't even admired you all dressed up, and you're trying to get us naked?"

"Admire later," Jensen gasped. "I _need_ you. I'm so fucking addicted to you."

"Yeah... okay..." Jared agreed quickly. "Good plan."

They stumbled towards the bedroom and by the time they got there Jensen had lost the suit jacket, his shoes and Jared was just pushing his shirt off his shoulders. Jensen whimpered when Jared's big hands slid up over his back, blunt nails dragging red marks over sensitive skin. Jensen's own hands were fighting with the button fly of Jared's jeans and he couldn't hold back a groan when he felt the hard bulge of Jared's cock under his fingers but to his surprise Jared pushed him away slightly. 

"I want to..." Jared said softly and pushed Jensen down on the bed. 

Jensen had expected Jared to follow him but instead his boyfriend took a step backwards and lifted his hands to grip the hem of his soft sweater, pulling it up over his head. Five years of Jared being his and Jensen didn't think he would ever get used to seeing Jared undress for him, miles and miles of skin and hard planes of muscles stretched out before him. What took his breath away though, was when Jared reached towards the bedside table and withdrew the lube but instead of coating his own fingers he handed it over to Jensen with a smile. 

"I want you to prepare me," he said. 

His mind quickly connected what his boyfriend was talking about, memories of previous talks painting perfect images in Jensen's mind, but it was still enough for his mouth to fall open. 

"Are you sure?" he asked, hand reaching out to close around the bottle of lube. 

"Jensen," Jared said and walked over, straddling Jensen on the bed. "I want you to get naked and I want your fingers inside me. I want you to be the first person, the only person to fuck me."

Without pushing Jared away, Jensen managed to wriggle his way free of his last clothes, but looking between the lube and up to Jared he knew that wasn't the position he wanted them in and by the slight smirk on Jared's lips, he was pretty sure his boyfriend had understood him.

"How do you want me?" Jared asked, leaning down for a deep, wet kiss. 

It was something Jensen had thought about, probably more than he should have since they first brought it up so many months earlier but they had never gotten around to it. All those months of planning meant he knew exactly how he wanted Jared and he got it out before he could think too much about it.

"I want you on all fours," he said quickly.

Jared raised and eyebrow and for a moment Jensen expected him to protest but instead the man moved off him, letting his tongue swipe over the pre-come slicked head of Jensen's cock before he positioned himself on all fours beside Jensen on the bed. The position spoke of both trust and raw _need_ , enough for Jensen's cock to twitch and push out more pre-come as he moved to kneel behind Jared, letting one hand slide over the rounded curve of the man's ass. 

It was an overwhelming feeling, having Jared presented so willingly to him when he knew that the man had never done that before, never offered himself to someone the way he offered himself to Jensen. Jensen popped the lid of the lube open but then he stopped himself, realizing there was something he wanted to do first now that he had Jared in font of him. Putting the lube back down he put his hands on Jared's ass, spreading the man open so that he could look at the tightly furled muscle and he leaned in to lick a slow stripe from Jared's perineum all the way up to the dip of his spine.

"Fuck... Jensen..." Jared groaned, his back arching as he pushed back against Jensen's tongue.

It wasn't that Jensen didn't love to get his tongue on Jared, but it wasn't often he found himself in that position so it was something he wanted to take his time to enjoy. Slowly he let his tongue trace over the hole, circling around the rim and he couldn't hold back a moan when he felt the muscle flutter beneath his tongue. Sliding one hand down he found Jared's cock hard, head already wet with pre-come and he wrapped his finger around it, stroking it slowly at the same time as he pushed the tip of his tongue inside Jared's body. 

"So good," Jared mumbled, upper body sinking down against the bed until his head was resting against his folded arms, moans slightly muffled by the bedding.

With a smile Jensen pressed soft kisses over Jared's ass, teeth nipping at the rounded swell before he returned his focus to the spit slicked hole, pushing his tongue inside time and time again. He could feel the tight muscle start to relax, making it possible for him to slide his tongue even deeper inside and Jensen's own cock was rock hard, his hips rocking down to push it down into the comforter in search of friction. Fumbling for the lube he snapped the lid open and slicked up two fingers, pulling away slightly so that he would be able to watch when he raised his hand and slowly pushed one finger inside.

Jared was incredibly tight around him, inner walls silky soft, practically sucking the finger in and despite wanting to make it last Jensen couldn't keep himself from pushing a second finger in, watching where the two digits disappeared into Jared's body.

"Are you..." he said, leaning in to press kisses over Jared's lower back and down over his ass. 

His boyfriend lifted his head enough to look back at Jensen, his usually hazel eyes practically dark with lust and want.

"Jensen, I'm _very_ sure," Jared said in a heated voice. "I want you to do this, fuck... I _need_ you to do this."

His words died off into a moan when Jensen pushed a third finger inside, fucking in and out until he could feel the tight muscle relax around his fingers. Pulling his fingers free he reached towards the lube once more, slicking his own cock until it was shiny with lube. Looking between his cock and Jared's ass, he couldn't really understand how he would fit in the small opening, but he knew Jared was bigger than him and the man had fit inside when Jensen was much smaller. 

"Jay..." he whispered, awestruck. 

"C'mon, Jen," Jared moaned, arching back. "Stop being such a tease and fuck me already."

The needy tone of his boyfriend's voice made Jensen's cock twitch and the last of his hesitation drained away. With his hand on Jared's hips he moved into position until the head of his cock was nudging against the lube slicked opening, and Jensen had to stop to take a few calming breaths to not come over Jared's firm ass. It was a heady feeling, knowing that Jared was doing this for the first time with him, _for_ him, and Jensen whimpered slightly when he pushed his hips forward and his cock spread Jared open. He knew Jared knew the feel of fingers inside him, but Jensen's would be the first cock he felt. The only cock he ever felt if Jensen had any say in it, and that knowledge pushed the pleasure higher and higher until Jensen was trembling with the effort to not slam his hips forward and bury himself in his boyfriend's ass. 

"More," Jared gasped when Jensen had managed to keep himself still for a few minutes, allowed Jared's body to get used to the unfamiliar stretch. "Wanna feel you."

Pushing his hips forward he let his cock slide deeper, pulling deep moans from the both of them when he felt Jared open up for him until Jensen was buried all the way inside. Raw pleasure crackled down his spine at the sensation of being so fully surrounded by Jared and even though Jensen once more held still, he could feel the man's muscles work around him like they were trying to milk the come right out of him. 

"Fuck," Jensen gasped and rocked his hips back and forth ever so slightly, a teasing drag that had the both of the trembling with pleasure. "Jesus... fuck it..."

He pulled out, pausing when only the head of his bare cock was holding Jared open, pink rim stretched prettily around his cock and Jensen took a deep breath before he snapped his hips forward to bury himself all the way inside of Jared once more. With his hands on Jared's hips, holding the man still, Jensen couldn't hold back any longer and he started fucking Jared with deep, hard thrusts that seemed to push the air out of Jared's lungs. 

"God," Jared moaned. "I understand... why you love this..."

Jensen smiled lightly and let his hands roam over the naked expanse of Jared's back, feeling strong muscles under his fingers and he moaned together with his friend.

"More, more, more," Jared chanted. "C'mon Jen, harder..."

He could feel when Jared deliberately flexed his muscles, squeezing Jensen's cock tightly and Jensen's breath caught in his lungs, hips stuttering against the man's ass. 

"Jay," he breathed out, reaching forward to tangle one hand in Jared's dark hair. 

The hair was like strands of silk between his fingers, and Jensen dared to take a tight grip, pulling Jared's head backwards, making the man's back arch and Jensen leaned forward to lick up the man's spine.

"I can't believe you're letting me do this," he moaned, fingers of his other hand sliding down from its place on Jared's hips. "Only me."

"We'll... do this more..." Jared promised between deep groans. "Fuck... you feel so good inside me. Jen..."

Reaching around Jared he let one hand wrap around the man's hard cock, fingers sliding through the pre-come and he felt his boyfriend do a full body shiver when Jensen started jerking him off in rhythm with his fucking. 

"Wanna come like this?" Jensen managed ask. "With... my cock inside you?"

"Jesus... fuck.. _yes_ ," Jared answered. 

Jensen shifted his hips, changing the angle and he was rewarded with a sharp cry of pleasure as his cock found Jared's prostate and the man in front of him seemed to lose every vestige of self control, pushing back against Jensen, chasing his own orgasm. The sensation was more intense than what Jensen had ever imagined it would be, Jared's strong body needy and pliant before him. Picking up his speed, he fucked Jared so hard that Jared slid forward on the bed, skin on skin and his own orgasm so close he wasn't sure he would be able to make it last enough to see Jared falling apart for him. 

"Jensen..." Jared gasped. "Love..."

With a twist of his hand and the tip of his fingers sliding over the head of Jared's cock, pushing into the slit, he had Jared coming with a shout, cock pulsing in Jensen's hand. Arching back Jared was fucking himself back on Jensen's cock, pushing forward into the grip of Jensen's hand around his own cock and the guttural groans combined with the way Jared fluttered around him had Jensen coming. His vision blurred at the edges when his cock pulsed deep inside Jared, slicking his insides with shot after shot of hot come until they both tumbled forward on the bed, spent and boneless.

Neither of them said a word, instead they just breathed heavily while they slowly came back down, Jared reaching back to put one big hand on Jensen's hip before he arched back once more. The motion made Jensen gasp at the friction against his softening cock and he carefully pulled back until his cock slid free of Jared's body with a wet sound. Jared lay on the bed, legs still parted and Jensen stared down at Jared's ass, rim looking slightly pink and puffy and a trickle of come leaked outside to slide down Jared's ass and thigh. Hesitating for a moment Jensen reached down to drag two fingers through the trickling of come before he lifted them to his own lips and licked away the combined taste of him, Jared and the underlying trace of come.

"Holy fuck," Jared groaned where he was looking back over his shoulder. "You're so fucking _dirty_.”

Jensen smiled and sucked his fingers in between his lips before reaching down once more to push the fingers inside Jared, coating them fully in the come inside of Jared before pulling them back and lifting them to his lips, sucking his fingers until all he could taste was skin.

"Do you even _have_ limits?" Jared muttered 

"Yeah. Probably, "Jensen smiled. "Haven't found them yet."

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared huffed out a laugh at that and rolled around on the bed until he was facing Jensen. The motion made the dull ache in his ass throb but if felt so _good_ he couldn't hold back a moan. Reaching for Jensen he pulled the boy closer once more, tangling their limbs together and licking his way into Jensen's mouth. Sometimes he was amazed by how much his boyfriend had grown since they first met, no longer the slender kid or the gangly teenager but someone who was slowly turning into a man. 

Stroking his hands down the curve of Jensen's back and further down to span the curve of his ass Jared was fascinated by the changes in Jensen, the stretch of hard muscles and long limbs. He rolled them around until Jensen was beneath him and for the first time he realized that Jensen was closing in on becoming as tall as Jared himself was. 

"Sometimes I forget that you're growing up," he said, looking down Jensen's naked body.

Jensen blinked a few times, green eyes still slightly glazed over from his orgasm. 

"What?" he mumbled, smiling up at Jared. 

"You're growing up," Jared repeated. "And you're growing up _fine_."

A small laugh escaped Jensen and the boy reached up to wrap his arms around Jared's neck, tugging him down for a deep kiss. 

"Thank you," he mumbled.

"For what?" Jared asked, confused by the words and the soft expression on Jensen's face. 

"For giving me this," Jensen said and rocked his hips upwards in a way that made it very clear what he was talking about. "And for... being with me all this time. For not minding that I grew up. For everything."

"Loving you is not something you need to thank me for," Jared said quietly. "Even though it will be good to be with you once you're out of school, be with you for real."

"Sap," Jensen smiled.

"Yeah," Jared agreed before leaning in and kissing Jensen until they were both gasping for breath. "I'm okay with being a sap."

He flicked off the light on the bedside table, drowning the room in darkness and then he pulled Jensen even closer, trading lazy kisses until they both drifted off to sleep. 

-¤-


	10. The First of Forever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A very important birthday, and a trip that gives Jared and Jensen their first glimpse of what their future might be like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Past) underage, age difference (Jensen 17-18, Jared 28)

-¤-

Jensen blinked awake and for a few long minutes he lay still, staring up at the white of his ceiling as he tried to untangle his own emotions before his family arrived as he knew they would. Looking over to the calendar on the wall he took in the day’s date, circled in lines of glossy black and bright red. 

March 1st.

Jensen was eighteen, he was legal, and for the first time him being with Jared was not breaking any laws. A few morale codes maybe, but no laws. It changed everything and nothing at the same time because he knew that with him still being in school, there was nothing they could really do about coming out. Not quite yet. But it was a step in the right direction and when the door to his room was pushed open, his family spilling inside, he had a bright smile on his lips but not for the reason his mother and father would think.

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Jensen, happy birthday to you."

Despite his smile Jensen cringed on the inside at the less than perfect notes his family managed to hit, he wasn't sure where he got his singing voice from but it sure wasn't from his parents. He grinned when he realized that even Josh had made it home from college in time for Jensen's birthday, he had expected Josh to come home for the weekend but not for his brother to be there bright and early on a Friday morning. 

"Happy birthday baby," Donna said and sat down next to Jensen on the bed, wrapping him up in a tight hug.

Jensen winced slightly at the baby part but he knew better than to say anything, it seemed that every time he did comment on her babying, she remembered he would be going away to college in a few months and she started crying. He really didn't want her crying on his birthday.

"Mom," he said and hugged her back. "And dad…"

Alan wrapped strong arms around the both of them and Jensen met Josh's amused look over his mom's shoulder. His two siblings came up to sit down on the foot of the bed once his parents relented on their hugging and moved back some.

"All grown up, eh?" Josh smirked. "You scrawny little git."

"Josh!" Donna gasped and then she sighed. "Can't you boys ever behave?"

"No," Jensen and Josh said as one and then grinned wide.

"The day Josh starts being nice to me, I'll be worried," Jensen pointed out and reached for the cup of coffee his father.

"Eighteen," his father said. "And in a few months you're going off to college."

Jensen prepared himself to settle in for his parents being all emotional but instead his father smiled wide.

"We have a bit of a surprise for you," his father said. "I know you were thinking about visiting a few colleges for spring break."

"Yeah," Jensen admitted. "But neither of you could get time off."

He was a bit upset about it, all his friends were going off to visit colleges they were interested in but Jensen had wondered if he would have to settle for just reading about the schools he had applied to.

"But we found someone who could," Donna said with a bright smile.

"What?" Jensen gasped and sat up straighter in the bed, almost spilling some of his beloved coffee. "Really?"

"Yeah, I found out he was going to San Fransisco for work and when I asked he said he wouldn't mind taking you along, extending his trip some."

"Who?" Jensen asked, expecting his parents to mention someone relative or a co-worker, and Jensen wouldn't even protest that if it meant going to visit his schools.

"Mr. Padalecki," Alan said. "We will give him some extra money for the trip so you can visit the LA schools as well."

Jensen had to fight to not scream out loud with joy and he was sure his smile was just a bit too bright. His parents just looked happy but when he looked at Josh he saw his brother frowning slightly and it was only pure willpower that allowed Jensen to not look away guiltily. He knew it only was a few months more and graduation would come, they would no longer have to hide. But he also knew that if anyone would figure it out, it was Josh. Even though he wanted to throw himself at the phone and thank Jared for the surprise that his boyfriend had clearly arranged for him, Jensen sat down instead and thanked his parents as calmly as he could before turning his attention to the gifts that had been dropped on his bed. Deep inside though, the happiness was still soaring high. He couldn't believe he would have several days with Jared, just the two of them and no one around to judge.

Best birthday ever.

-¤-

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jensen asked the second he stepped into Jared's living room.

Jared and Chad both turned around from where they were sitting on the couch, watching Project Runway and at any other time Jensen would have teased them about it. 

"Birthday boy!" Chad exclaimed. "How does it feel being legal?"

With a slap towards his friend’s head Jared got up and walked over to Jensen, big hands coming to rest on Jensen's hips as Jared pushed him back against the wall and kissed him until Jensen felt his head spin from pleasure as well as lack of oxygen. 

"Happy birthday baby," Jared said with a soft smile, frowning when Jensen burst out laughing. 

"What?" Jared said, taking a step back and looking between Jensen and Chad.

"Sorry," Jensen managed to get out, still laughing. "It's just... the exact same thing my mom said this morning."

"Oh," Jared said with a grin. "Awkward."

He removed all other thoughts from Jensen's mind with another deep kiss, hands pushing down into the back pockets of Jensen's jeans to pull him even closer. 

"First time I can do this without breaking the law," Jared said with a grin that was somewhere between guilty and amused. 

A low groan rose from Chad but Jensen ignored it in favor of pulling Jared deeper into the kiss, fingers digging into Jared's hair. He didn't know how long they stayed kissing until Jensen finally managed to remember what he had tried to ask his boyfriend about. 

"We're... going to..." he managed to get out between soft kisses.

"San Fransisco," Jared said and pulled away enough to smile down at Jensen. "You like it?"

"I love it!" Jensen exclaimed. "Almost one week... just the two of us. How did you talk my parents into that?"

Jared laughed and Jensen found himself dragged along to the couch where Chad just rolled his eyes when Jared sat down and dragged Jensen down on his lap.

"Aren't you a bit big to be a lap boy, kid?" Chad said and reached out to nudge Jensen's foot.

Sitting on Jared's lap Jensen felt too content to give all but a half-hearted kick at Chad who easily moved away from it before getting up and walking towards the kitchen.

"I've talked your parents into things for years, Jen," Jared pointed out. "They like me, and trust me."

"This is one of the many reasons you will burn in hell," Chad called out from the kitchen.

"Thank you, Chad," Jared groaned and tugged Jensen even closer. "That doesn't make me feel perverted at all."

Jensen was just about to point out that he was rather sure there were quite a few more reasons than the one Chad just stated but then his eyes fell on a small pile of brightly wrapped gifts on the table.

"Hey, gifts!" he said and reached for one of them, almost falling off Jared's lap.

"Maybe you _are_ too big for this," Jared laughed and pulled Jensen into a better position. "But damn if I ever want to let you go."

The tone in his voice made it obvious that the man was talking about more than Jensen on his lap, talking about _them_ in the way they had done over the last few months, circling around the subject that neither of them seemed ready to attack full on. Instead Jensen focused on what he had right then and there; the stack of gifts on the table and Chad returning from the kitchen with a small cake in his hands.

-¤-

"Mom," Jensen sighed, knowing full well that she wouldn't listen.

"Are you _sure_ you have everything you need?" Donna asked, reaching to open Jensen's bag to check for herself. 

"I'm sure," Jensen said for the fifth time in the last twenty minutes, hoping that Jared would be there soon so that he could get away. "Mom, I'm eighteen, I know how to pack a bag."

He pulled the bag out of her grasp to make sure she wouldn't find the clothes that he bought with the sole purpose of making Jared slam him up against a wall. She tried to grab it from him once more but just then he heard the honk of a car horn outside and quickly he grabbed the two bags he had packed and headed towards the door.

"I'll be okay, mom," he tossed back over his shoulder. "I'll be with Jared, you know he will have everything planned in minute detail."

Behind him his mother laughed and he heard her following him when he went outside to where Jared's big SUV was idling, Jared clearly having decided that small talk with Jensen's parents was something he preferred to avoid and Jensen couldn't agree more. The goodbye's still took longer than he had hoped for, he and Jared both trading quick glances that made Jensen very happy that Josh wasn't there to witness it all. By the time he finally managed to get into the car he felt itchy with the need to reach out and touch. 

Both he and Jared remained silent, only trading a few looks as the big car took them out of the city, further away from all that kept them apart.

-¤-  
-¤-

It was like Jared's mind had a hard time catching up with the fact that it was only him and Jensen, no one around to hide away from. It wasn't until they were out of the city limits that it all started to feel real and he allowed himself to reach out and tangle his fingers together with his boyfriend's. 

"I can't believe you're doing this for me," Jensen said, grasping Jared's hand tightly. 

"Well, I _was_ honest with your parents, I do have some work related issues in San Fransisco," Jared said with a smile. "It's just.. I didn't have to do them right now. And it will only take a day. I might have forgotten to mention that part."

Jensen laughed, a brilliantly free sound that he hadn't heard in awhile, not with Jensen so wrapped up in school and Jared himself busy exploring new ways to extend the small deli that he managed. Hearing Jensen laugh so freely made warmth fill him and really hoped he would be able to get his work done really fast so that he could focus on spending some quality time with Jensen. He was just about to drift off into some very pleasant dreams of how things would be once they no longer had to hide their relationship away when Jensen spoke up.

"You know, Chad is right," the boy said.

"Now there's a statement you don't hear very often," Jared deadpanned. 

"About my parents and the burning in hell part," Jensen said and Jared frowned. "I mean, they wont be all that happy once they find out, you do realize that, right?"

The sudden turn into serious topics had Jared driving faster without really thinking about it, tension coiling through his body as he stroked his thumb over the soft skin of Jensen's hand. 

"Yeah. I had kinda figured," Jared said quietly. "I always knew that, not like I will be their beloved son-in-law anytime soon. But Jen? I really don't care. I'm not in a relationship with them, I'm in a relationship with _you_."

The twist and turns of the road forced him to pull his hand from Jensen's grip and focus on the driving, but he could practically hear the boy thinking, the wheels in his head turning round and round. 

"Do you fear their reaction?" Jared asked, keeping his eyes locked on the road. 

"Yes," Jensen admitted. "And no."

Jared waited for a few moments to see if Jensen would say more, and soon the boy cleared his throat and went on speaking, voice sounding much more decided than Jared had expected. 

"I know what I'm in for here, Jared," Jensen said softly. "I've known for quite a few years, since the very first time we even mentioned not hiding it anymore. It's not like I gonna change my mind now that I'm so close to our goal. I _love_ my family but... I could never give you up."

"That makes me happy," Jared said, unable to hold his smile back. "You know, one day we will meet my family. Not sure I'll tell them just how long we've been together though."

Jensen laughed quietly at that and in the corner of his eye Jared could see the boy shake his head slightly.

"No, I think that little detail is for us," he said. "And well... for Chad and Chris. But you know..."

They drifted into comfortable silence, Jensen reaching for his backpack and Jared laughed when he saw the boy pull out a thermos, the fragrance of coffee filling the car when he opened it. Jared couldn't really remember when Jensen had started drinking coffee, it seemed to be a gradual thing the boy got used to since Jared and Chad always had a pot of coffee brewing. Thinking about it, though, he was pretty sure that Jensen was much more addicted than he and Chad had ever been. 

It wasn't until they got down from the mountains and instead started driving out the desert roads that Jensen let go of his beloved thermos and instead shifted around so that he was facing Jared in the seat. Jared could feel the boy's gaze on him as he finally could relax some, nothing but the straight and open road ahead of them instead of the twisting mountain road. 

"What are you thinking about?" Jared asked when the gaze on him started to feel heavy. 

"Nothing much," Jensen mumbled and reached out a hand. 

Jared had thought Jensen would take his hand once more but instead the boy put his hand on Jared's thigh, fingers stroking over tightly stretched denim. It wasn't a big surprise when Jared felt his cock twitch with interest at the small touch, so many years spent with Jensen and he thought that his reaction to Jensen's hands on his body was practically Pavlovian. 

"Jen," he said and tossed the boy a quick glance. 

"Relax," Jensen said with a smile. "Just wanna feel..."

His fingers drifted over Jared's leg, sliding further up and fingers finding the inseam and softly stroking over it. Jared _knew_ he should push Jensen's hand away and tell him to stop, but when it came to Jensen _no_ didn't seem to be a choice anymore.

"You've felt plenty of times," Jared mumbled, very much aware of how thick his voice sounded. 

"This is different," Jensen said, fingers almost close to where Jared wanted them, and at the same time hoped they wouldn't venture. "This is... you and me. No hiding."

With that he slid his hand up, brushing over Jared's crotch before cupping the growing swell, heel of his hand pushing perfectly against Jared's cock where it was trapped in suddenly too tight jeans. 

"Fuck," Jared gasped. "You know that not hiding and... public sex isn't the same thing, right?"

"We're not going to have sex, Jay," Jensen said, undoing his belt to be able to shift closer. 

Jared would have been much more reassured had Jensen's clever fingers not already reached the top button and the boy was clearly trying to get it open, something that seemed hard to do with just one hand but Jared had no doubt the boy would manage. Jensen wasn't a quitter after all. 

"Oh really?" Jared said, sounding half-choked when Jensen managed to get the button open. "So what are we... god... Jen..."

Glancing down he saw Jensen work his hand inside the confines of the jeans, pushing them down enough to get his hand on Jared's half-hard cock. It was something with Jensen's hands on him that always made Jared's blood boil and this time was no exception. 

"I'm just... showing how happy you make me," Jensen said and Jared could hear the smile even though he couldn't see it. "I'm so happy that you'd do something like this for me."

With those words Jensen started stroking Jared's cock, fingers sliding up over the crown to gather the first beads of pre-come and slide them down Jared's length. 

"Focus on the road," Jensen said. "Let me do all the work."

"Focus...right..." Jared groaned when he felt himself harden quickly, Jensen knew how to play his body after all. "That might be easier said than done if you... oh..."

Whatever he had planned to say was drowned out in a shocked moan when Jensen leaned in and dragged his tongue over the slit, tasting Jared.

"Are you insane?" he hissed. "We're on the highway, what if someone sees?"

"They can't," Jensen said, his breath hot against Jared's cock. "We're in an SUV... we're higher up than they are... just... keep driving."

Incredible hotness surrounded his cock when his boyfriend closed soft lips around Jared's dick, sealing them just below the head before he starting sucking softly. Jared wasn't more than human and he really didn't think he could be blamed for the way the car swerved on the road for a brief moment. Looking around he was grateful to not see any another car close by and he breathed out a sigh of relief.

"You're gonna be the death of me," he mumbled. 

Jensen just chuckled around him and that sent very interesting vibrations through Jared's cock. He let one hand fall down to cup the back of Jensen's head, pushing the boy down further on his cock. Focusing on driving was hard, the pleasure of Jensen's mouth on him was too intense but it also made memories flicker in his mind, of the very first time Jared had been on his knees for Jared. Present pleasure and memories were enough for Jared to wish he could just pull the car over and take Jensen, fuck him hard against the side of the car, but that was a sure way to get discovered. Jensen was right after all, in the car there wasn't much chance any other drivers on the road would realize what was happening. 

Spit and pre-come was leaking from Jensen's mouth, Jared could feel it slide down his shaft, slicking the way for Jensen's hand that was stroking the part of Jared's cock that he couldn’t fit in his mouth. The sweet pleasure of Jensen's mouth and hand on him, combined with the _wrongness_ of the whole situation, had Jared already feeling his orgasm starting to build deep inside, white hot pleasure shooting up his spine and crackling just below his skin. 

"Jensen... Fuck... your _mouth_ ," he gasped. "Jen..."

The orgasm slammed into him hard, pleasure coursing through him as he emptied himself into Jensen's mouth, feeling the boy swallow around him as his hand and mouth worked to get every single drop of come out of him.

"Fuck fuck fuck," Jared gasped, struggling to keep the car on the right side of the road. 

With an obscenely wet _pop_ Jensen pulled off Jared's cock, pushing back unto his own seat and when Jared looked over he saw the boy lick his lips clean, like he wanted to savor the taste. 

"I'd say this trip is off to a great start," Jensen said, voice sounding rough. 

With nimble fingers he pulled Jared's pants back in place, fingers brushing over his soft cock and the boy gave a knowing little smirk when Jared's cock twitched despite the brain melting orgasm he just had. 

"I would say..." Jared said with a grin. "The things you make me agree to."

The little self-satisfied smile on Jensen's lips remained for the better part of their ten hour drive, something that made Jared wish they didn't already have a room booked in San Fransisco because he would much rather stay in some small town on the way and lock himself away with Jensen. 

-¤-

"I feel like all my dreams are crushed," Jensen said with a miserable sigh.

"Because you can't get everywhere with the cable cars?" Jared asked. 

"Yes!" Jensen pouted. "Clearly, movies lie."

"Ah, who'd have though?" Jared said, trying to sound understanding but considering the glare he got from Jensen he was pretty sure that he failed quite spectacularly. 

"You're my..." Jensen started but then he fell silent, looking around the crowded street nervously. 

Jared knew what thoughts were passing through Jensen's mind, could read the worry and hesitation clear on his face, but he also knew that his young boyfriend didn't need to feel like that. 

"I'm your boyfriend," Jared said in a clear tone. "It gives me the right to mock, while being fully supportive, of course."

At the word _boyfriend_ Jensen blushed and looked around again but his nerves seemed soothed when no one seemed to give them another look. Biting down on his lower lip in a gesture that made Jared want to return to their hotel room, Jensen slowly moved closer until their hands were brushing against each other as they walked. 

"You know what part of me coming here with you was all about?" Jared asked.

"Work?" Jensen suggested, raising and eyebrow.

"Well, yes," Jared admitted. "But mostly it was about being able to do this." 

He moved his hand until he could take Jensen's smaller hand in his, twining their fingers together and pulling Jensen even closer. When he looked down at Jensen he was met with wide, green eyes and slightly parted lips when Jensen stared at him in what could only be described as shock.

"You're holding my hand," Jensen mumbled. "In public."

"I am," Jared agreed. "And see, no one cares. Not here, not about us."

It took a while but he could see the very moment it dawned on Jensen what the week could be all about, but the second all the pieces seemed to have clicked into place Jared found himself with an arm full of Jensen. A warm mouth was pressed against his and Jared didn't really think it through, he just parted his lips to let Jensen inside in a slow kiss.

"We can hold hands," Jensen mumbled against Jared's lips. "For real... we can... That's so... so..."

"Yeah," Jared agreed. "It is."

Hand in hand they walked up the wide pathway to San Fransisco State University and Jared could feel Jensen tremble slightly at his side. 

"Are you nervous?" he asked.

"A bit," Jensen admitted. "This might be it, the school I'll spend years in."

"You have applied to other colleges," Jared pointed out. "This isn't your only choice."

"I know," Jensen said, smile on his lips. "But this is...special..."

Walking up towards the school he felt Jensen pushing even closer, pressing his body up against Jared's side in a way that they never had been able to when they were in their own hometown. A small group of people were waiting on the front steps and Jared was sure that they were there for the same reason that he and Jensen was, if their lost expressions was anything to go by.

"Do you know where the office is?" he asked his boyfriend. "Because I'm pretty sure none of them do."

"I... have no idea," Jensen said and looked around. "I think it's..."

"Are you guys all here for the tour of the campus?" a voice interrupted them as a young woman pushed the door open and stepped outside. 

The woman looked around the small group and Jared followed her gaze and then he realized that all the other students there to visit seemed to be there with their parents. Jensen seemed to become aware of the same thing because he hid his face against Jared's and Jared could hear the boy's half muffled laughter.

"You're making an awesome first expression," Jared mumbled. 

"I'm Sarah Klein," the woman said. "I'm an undergrad here and I will be the one guiding you around the campus today. I know that some of you will want to sit in on a few classes as well this afternoon. Your parents are of course allowed to accompany you all the entire time. Well, except for the student party in the evening, that is meant for you to get to know some of the current students attending the campus. That is a parent free zone."

Jared had a hard time hiding his smirk at that. If this school's party was anything like the one he himself had attended, he very much understood that they didn't want any parents present. Sarah walked around the small group, trading a few words with each person to visit the campus, shaking hands and shooting off brilliant smiles that probably reassured parents, but Jared was still too fresh out of school to have forgotten how easy it could be to win parents over. After all, he did it with Jensen's parents on an almost weekly basis. Just as that less than appropriate thought had crossed his mind, the young woman stopped in front of the two of them with a brilliant smile on her lips. 

"Considering you're the last one I'm talking to, and that I only got two names left on the list, I'm guessing you're either Jensen or... " she said, looking down at the list in her hand. "Marcus. Which one is it?"

"I'm Jensen Ackles," Jensen said with a nod. "So I guess that the Marcus fellow is a no-show."

"It happens," Sarah said easily. "Usually have more than one, but then the group usually is bigger than this one. And you are..."

The question faded from her lips when she took in the way Jared's fingers were tangled tightly together, the way their bodies were angled together for maximum contact without being inappropriate. 

"Oh, your boyfriend is taking you? That's so sweet!" Sarah exclaimed. "And I know I shouldn't say anything, but you two are exceptionally good looking, even more so when together. Anyway..."

Jared saw a blush stain his boyfriend's cheeks and he couldn't help but pull the boy even closer, pressing a kiss against the top of his head. Despite most of the group looking at them he couldn't help but feeling very at ease with Jensen so close to him.

"Thank you," Jensen said just as Sarah was turning back towards the rest of the group. "Thank you for being so... accepting."

The woman just smiled, showing off perfectly even and white teeth.

"This is San Fransisco," she said. "We got our reputation for a reason. Not that we don't have idiots, all towns do, but our awesome ratio is quite high."

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen felt exhausted, both body and mind drained from the last two days and he wanted nothing more than to spend the entire day asleep in the ridiculously comfortable hotel bed but it seemed like Jared had other plans for them.

"Rise and shine, loverboy," Jared exclaimed in a cheerful tone that just didn't had anything to do this far from noon. 

"No," Jensen mumbled and buried further down into the bed. "Go way. I'm dead."

"Awww, did I fuck you unconscious?" Jared asked in an all too self-satisfied tone. 

"Charming," Jensen muttered. "Really, so very charming."

All other protests died when he felt Jared's big body on top of him, muscular thighs trapping Jensen belly first against the bed. Slow burning heat started to raise inside him when he felt the hard line of Jared's cock press against the small of his back. 

"C'mon, Jen," he nudged. "There's an whole ocean out there that I would love to get to know. Not much ocean at home after all."

Jensen blinked a few times and yawned so wide his jaw cracked but when Jared leaned in to press hot kisses against his neck all thoughts of lingering sleep left Jensen's body in favor of _need_ and _want_. 

"Beach. Get up."

With a quick slap to Jensen's ass Jared got off the bed and Jensen sighed before he admitted defeat, there was really no way he would pass up some well needed beach time with his boyfriend, not when they were in one of the few places where people seemed to just accept them. 

"You know, my parents think that _you_ are working and _I_ am busy with school stuff," Jensen pointed out as he got out of the bed, stretching his naked body and he could _feel_ Jared's eye on him.

"Jared, look away or there's no way we'll get to the beach," Jensen said with a laugh.

"Get dressed," Jared said. "I'll go get us some coffee from the Starbucks around the corner.”

The door clicked shut behind him and Jensen had to stop and just take it all in, a smile stretching his lips. There was no doubt in his mind, there was no need for them to go visit UCLA, because Jensen had gotten the first taste of his future, and it tasted pretty damn good.

-¤-

The water felt chilly against Jensen's sun warmed skin and he thought that his face might actually stick in the ever present smile that he had sported since their arrival in San Fransisco.

"What are you thinking about?"

Strong arms wrapped tightly around his waist and Jensen allowed himself to lean back against Jared's chest, not even bothering to look around to see if there were any people paying attention their closeness. 

"I like this town," Jensen mumbled. "It feels... welcoming."

"You just like it because I can touch you in public," Jared laughed, lips pressing against the sensitive spot just below Jensen's ear. 

"It's a good... Jared!"

The name came out as a warning hiss when Jared's hand disappeared beneath the surface of the water, sliding over Jensen's belly before dipping down to push inside Jensen's swim trunks. 

"People, there are people here," Jensen moaned when a big hand wrapped around his suddenly hardening cock.

"I know," Jared mumbled. "Just... keep quiet."

It was easier said than done when Jared pulled him even further back and Jensen could feel the hard line of his boyfriend's cock through two layers of swimwear. Jensen bit down on his lower lip, fighting to keep silent when Jared's sure fingers knowingly worked his cock, big hand a perfect warmth surrounding him. 

"This is so wrong," Jensen mumbled. 

"It's not the most _wrong_ thing we've ever done," Jared pointed out. 

Jensen felt his cock twitch with interested at that reminder and it wasn't like it was something he could argue against. When it came to him and Jared, he wondered if the wrongness of things wasn't part of what made it so good. 

"There are... oh... Jay... there are _kids_ , on this beach," Jensen whispered.

Looking around he realized that there were no people close, they were too far out in the water, Jared's impressing height and his arms around Jensen's waist the only thing keeping his head above the surface. 

"No one can see," Jared assured. "So just relax and... let me.."

Jensen didn't need to ask just what he should let Jared do, it became quite obvious when Jared let go of his cock in favor of moving his hand down between them, pushing shorts down until the hot length of his cock was riding the cleft of Jensen's ass without anything separating them. He knew that Jared couldn't fuck him, not in public and not without preparations, but the closeness to where he really wanted Jared was still enough for Jensen to bite back a moan. Jared's hand returned to wrap around Jensen's cock, finger sliding over the length and Jensen pushed back against the hard cock behind him. It was something that never failed to take his breath away, the perfect feel of skin on skin, and the pressure of Jared's hand on his dick.

A shiver ran through Jensen's body when Jared's hand moved up, finger brushing over the crown and looking down Jensen could see the beads of pre-come staining the water white before they disappeared in the soft waves that kept pushing Jensen back and forth between the hand surrounding him and the cock that was nudging it's way in between his ass cheeks. 

"Fuck," he whimpered quietly. "Want you..."

"I know," Jared answered and his voice was rough with arousal. "Jen... wish I could take you right here and now... show everyone who you belong to. But this is _mine_. You are mine, only mine. They don't get to see you like this."

The possessive tone in Jared's voice sent another shiver through Jensen's body and he felt the smooth head of Jared's cock brush against his hole he couldn't fully hold back his groan. 

"Jay..." he managed to get out, trembling with pleasure when Jared's fingers brushed the sensitive vein on the underside of his cock. 

"So beautiful like this," Jared groaned. "If only you could see yourself right now."

It wasn't himself that Jensen wanted to see though, he wanted to see Jared. During their hours at the beach it hadn't been easy to keep his eyes off his boyfriend, miles of tanned skin shimmering with droplets of water just begging to be licked off. But looking down to where the clear water gave him a perfect view of Jared's hand around his dick, Jensen wondered how they looked together, wrapped around each other in the deep water. All thoughts were pushed away however when Jared suddenly spun him around so that they were facing each other and the next second a warm mouth covered Jensen's. 

"I love you," he heard Jared breath against his lips. 

Jensen wrapped his legs around Jared's hips, pushing their hard cocks together and they both reached down between their bodies at the same time. Tangling their fingers together both their hands closed around their cocks, working over water and pre-come slicked skin to build up a friction that had Jensen trembling in Jared's arms. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Jensen whined, rocking his hips forward. 

"When we get back to the hotel," Jared promised. "Gonna spread you out on the bed, lick every fucking trace of salt from your skin before I open you up with my tongue."

The words had Jensen keening, the fingers of his free hand digging hard into Jared's shoulders as the pleasure pushed higher and higher inside him. 

"Like that plan, Jen?" Jared asked.

Jensen had no idea how his boyfriend expected him to be able to answer, Jensen's mind wasn't really able to put words together if it meant more than pleading for _more_ and _yes please_. It seemed to be enough for Jared though, because his hand picked up speed and with a twist of their hands he had Jensen coming hard, white strand of come staining the water between them. Jensen's head fell down on Jared' shoulder and he bit down on the firm muscle to keep himself from screaming out in pleasure. He felt when Jared tensed, his hips jerking up against Jensen as his boyfriend came as well, his come mixing with Jensen's. 

"That was..." Jensen started when his breathing finally started to calm down. 

"Dirty," Jared chuckled, making Jensen blush and laugh.

"Do you think anyone saw?" Jensen asked, glancing towards the beach. 

"They might suspect something," Jared grinned. "So maybe we should stay here until... well, until I know for sure my legs would hold me upright. Damn Jen, the way you make me feel."

He held Jensen close, kissing him time and time again while the waves crashed softly against their entwined bodies. 

"Do you like the town?" Jensen asked, his legs still wrapped around Jared.

Jared shifted them around enough to get their shorts back in place and Jensen missed the extra skin on skin contact right away.

"It's a good town," Jared admitted. "And it had some amazing providers that we could use for the store, some locally produced things I would love to sell."

Jensen smiled and snuggled closer to Jared, but he didn't voice any of the worries that had been plagued him since the day he realized for sure that he would be moving away to go to college. He wasn't sure what the distance would do to their relationship, but he never brought up the subject, and neither had Jared. Pushing the thought away he focused on what he had right then and there, Jared's arms wrapped tightly around him and no one around them caring the slightest. 

-¤-

The warm, firm spray of the shower washed away any trace of sand, salt and come from Jensen's skin, a combination that seemed to have been there more times than not during their time in San Fransisco but it was their last evening there and Jared had said they were doing something special. He had no idea what special could be, as far as Jensen was concerned his spring break had really been special enough. 

Stepping out of the shower he reached for one of the big soft towels that the hotel supplied them with and he took his time drying off, running the towel through his hair until it was a halo of sun bleached gold around his head. Jensen reached for his clothes, opting to change somewhere Jared couldn't see him, he wanted to give his boyfriend the full effect of the new clothes. Pulling on tight black boxer briefs first he tried to hear what Jared was doing out in the room, but he was only met with silence. The black slacks fit perfectly, clinging to his hips and ass and Jensen couldn't stop himself from admiring in the full length mirror for a moment. He would have preferred to pull on the black jeans and tight shirt that had Jared growling and throwing him down on the bed, but he thought that special probably called for more than a few hours of really good sex. Reaching for his emerald green shirt he froze in place when he heard Jared talking outside, words that clearly weren't aimed for Jensen. 

"I just want it done soon," he heard Jared say in a low voice. "In a few months I have no reason to stay there anymore."

The shirt fell to the floor and Jensen breath caught in his throat as he took a step towards the door. He was just about to pull it open when he heard Jared continue to speak. 

"It's a very good and calm neighborhood, but it's not for me. I need to move along, so the sooner you can get the house on the market the better. Yes. Of course. We've talked about this before, and I'm sure. I know the house was left to me, but I will not live there and I don't see the point to keep it. I don't intend to return to the neighborhood after all."

Silence stretched out for a few long moments and Jensen knew that Jared was on the phone, waiting for whomever was on the other end to be done. 

"Right. I'll come in to sign the last of the papers come Monday. Right. Bye Mrs. Smith."

Slowly Jensen reached down to pick up his shirt, taking time to slide into it and buttoning it up. His mind was spinning with questions he was sure he should have asked weeks, months, ago, but he had no idea how to put them into words.

"Jen? Are you about done?"

Opening his mouth to answer Jensen found himself even more lost for words and he wasn't really surprised when the door in front of him opened and he was face to face with Jared. 

"Wow, Jen, you look like you've seen a ghost, what's up?" Jared asked, a worried frown creasing his forehead. 

Jensen took a deep breath, trying to get his brain to stop working in overdrive but before he could get himself together Jared reached out to put one big hand on Jensen's arm and the words came out before he could stop himself. 

"You're selling the house."

His hand freezing in mid air, Jared looked surprised for a moment and then he laughed, taking Jensen by complete surprise.

"Oh, you heard that?" he said with a low chuckle. "I hadn't planned for that."

" _Why_ are you selling the house?" Jensen asked, ignoring the smile on Jared's lips because he needed to know the answer.

"What?" Jared said, sounding as surprised as Jensen felt. "Of course I'm selling the house, why would I want to keep it?"

The easy confession stunned Jensen for a moment and when he spoke again he could hear the hurt in his own voice. 

"Right. Why would you when your little... boy toy isn't around anymore."

Jared flinched away like Jensen had punched him, a glimmer of hurt in his eyes that was quickly washed away by anger. Stepping away, back into the main room, Jared turned his back towards Jensen but his anger was still obvious in the tense line of his shoulders.

"That is what you think?" Jensen heard Jared say in a too calm voice. "Really, Jensen?"

Before Jensen could answer Jared sank down on the bed, hiding his face in his hands and the anger seemed to drain right off of him, replaced by an aura of sadness and hurt that made Jensen's heart ache. 

"I don't know," Jensen said and took a few steps closer to his boyfriend. "It's not like we've talked about this. At all. I just... hoped that you would at least come visit me at college."

"Come visit..." Jared started but then he stopped and Jensen could hear him swallow thickly. "Jesus fuck."

"Jared?" Jensen said, stepping even closer and sitting down beside the man on the bed. "I'm..."

"You need to stop doubting me," Jared interrupted. "Really, haven't we been through this a few times already? This between us, you _know_ it's more than just sex. You must know that."

"I know," Jensen admitted and it wasn't a lie, he _did_ know but it never seemed to be enough to keep his insecurities at bay. "I don't doubt you. I doubt me being good enough for you."

Having the words spoken out loud made him feel too open, too raw and vulnerable and he didn't dare to look over at Jared, instead his gaze was firmly locked on his own hands where they lay in his lap. 

"Oh you stupid little boy," Jared said but there was so much fondness in the words that Jensen couldn't find it in himself to be offended. "I'm not gonna come _visit_ you, Jensen. I plan to move to San Fransisco with you."

Jensen blinked, still looking down at his own hands as the words Jared had spoken tried to fit themselves together correctly in his mind. Somewhere deep inside he could feel the rise of something warm, a flutter in his belly that had his eyes go wide.

"Jen?" Jared said when the silence stretched out between them.

That small, hesitant little name was enough for Jensen to snap out of his stunned silence and he was in Jared's lap before he was aware of moving, his arms wrapping around his boyfriend's neck. 

"You're coming here? With me?" he asked, not able to hold his wide smile back.

"Jesus," Jared said with a laugh. "You... you really hadn't figured that out? Five and a half years, Jensen. You really thought I would let you go now? We have said we wold come out, why do that to _not_ be together?"

"I didn't know," Jensen mumbled. "Fuck... I didn't know, okay? And I didn't want to ask because..."

"You were afraid of what the answer would be," Jared completed the sentence when Jensen wasn't able to. "You know, for being such a smart guy, you're amazingly stupid at times."

"Hey!" Jensen protested. 

"No, listen to me," Jared said and he wrapped his arms around Jensen's waist. "I _love_ you. I plan to keep on loving you. That's not going to change. We belong together. Damnit Jensen, you're _it_ for me, haven't I made that clear time and time again."

Jensen was smiling so wide it hurt, and the lump in his throat prevented him from getting a single word out but from the look on Jared's face he didn't really need to say anything at all. He was pretty sure the smile said more than words could anyway.

"That's why I had to travel here," Jared continued. "I knew you had hopes of going here, so I went here to explore the possibilities of opening another branch here, and I think it's happening. It would be the first deli out of state, and the owners want _me_ to manage it."

"You're coming to California with me," Jensen managed to get out then.

"Yes," Jared said with a wide smile. "I know you have to spend the first year in the dorms, but I promise to find an apartment close by so you can be there as much as you want. And after the first year, you come live with me. How does that sound?"

It sounded like a dream come true, like everything Jensen had barely dared to hope for delivered to him on a silver platter and for a few minutes all he could do was kiss Jared for all he was worth. 

"Love you," he manged to get out when they pulled apart for air. "Living together. Of course, yes. I want that. I've wanted that for years now."

"So no more doubting me?" Jared asked. "No more thinking you're not good enough for me, or that I'll grow bored with you. I won’t."

"You can't promise that," Jensen pointed out, but he was still smiling wide. 

"I've seen you grow up, Jen," Jared said and that statement made a shiver run down Jensen's spine, the same reaction he always felt when Jared talked about their first times together. "You were the prettiest boy I've seen, and so damn brilliant. But who you are now? I love you _so_ much more now, you're my equal now."

Jensen knew he was blushing, but he really didn't think that was something he could be blamed for, not with the way all of Jared's focus was on him, big hands holding him close. 

"I wont stop loving you," Jared went on. "I plan to spend my future with you. Here. In this very city."

"You and me," Jensen grinned, and then he had to add something. "Oh, and Sadie and Harley. Family."

"Family," Jared nodded.

The next motion was so fast that Jensen didn't have time to realize what was happening before he found himself on his back on the bed, Jared on top of him and their lips pressed together in the kind of kiss that made Jensen realize they were not going out for dinner. 

Jensen moaned when Jared's hands stroked down his side, the slide of his soft shirt against his skin enhancing each touch. He thought that Jared would make quick work of his clothes, but instead Jared's hands just kept stroking over his body while his boyfriend devoured his mouth, kisses that alternated between soft brushes of lips and kisses deep enough to steal Jensen's breath away. Having Jared over him like that made Jensen feel small, his slender body still easy enough for Jared to push and shift however he wanted if only Jensen let him, and Jensen loved having Jared's strong hands on his body. 

"Please..."

The word was out before Jensen had time to consider it and he wasn't sure he even knew what he was begging for, but it seemed like Jared didn't need to ask. Pulling away from Jensen's mouth Jared's lips instead drifted down his jaw, sucking softly at his neck but without leaving any marks. His hands came up to slowly open the first two buttons on Jensen's shirt, wicked tongue licking over the revealed skin in a touch so soft it had Jensen wanting to beg for more. It was obvious however, that Jared didn't want to hurry things, instead he kept kissing over that little patch of skin before he carefully undid another button, lips and tongue tracing each new inch of bare skin and by the time the last button was open Jensen was trembling with the intense need for something more, for _everything_. 

"Jared..." he gasped. "You..."

One finger pressed against his lips then, urging him to stay silent as Jared smiled down at him. His boyfriend hadn't even pushed the shirt aside, it only revealed a thin strip of skin but then Jared started pushing it away, slow enough for Jensen to arch up into the gentle brush of fingers against his ribs. 

"Tease," he practically whined but Jared just smiled and kept moving just as slowly.

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen's skin was flushed the most delicate shade of pink, barely visible under the soft tan that had brought out a sea of freckles on previously creamy skin. It wasn't often Jared took his time to worship every inch of Jensen, their limited time together usually meant that there was a lot of tearing at clothes, an urgency that several days spent with Jensen seemed to have polished away. 

"I wish I could take photos of you like this," he mumbled, kissing the sensitive skin stretched taut over Jensen's collar bone. "You look so perfect..."

"It would... last longer," Jensen said with a shiver.

"Mmmm," Jared hummed as he finally lifted Jensen up to pull his shirt off completely and throwing it down on the floor. "But I can make this last as well..."

He continued kissing further down, over soft skin down to the dip of Jensen's belly button, tongue dipping inside for the briefest of moments before he continued further down. The black slacks fit Jensen better than anything Jared had ever seen his boyfriend in, black cloth enhancing narrow hips and clinging to the upper part of the boy's thighs. Going slow with removing them was almost torture, Jared wanted to see more of his boyfriend, but it was worth it to see Jensen's hips rise off the bed in a silent plea for more. 

"C'mon," Jensen whined. "I need..."

"I know what you need," Jared mumbled as he undid the button on the soft slacks. "You need to be worshipped."

Jensen let out a low whimper at that and Jared smiled against the soft skin on his hip, sucking bruises on the only place on Jensen's body where he always dared to leave his mark. Pushing the pants down he let his hands trace over soft skin, taking in the bow of Jensen's legs, the curves that he loved having wrapped around his waist. 

"I wish I could have you like this all the time," Jared said as he pushed himself up on his knees and looked down at Jensen where he was laying splayed out naked on the bed. 

"In a few months," Jensen whimpered.

Jared groaned and lifted his hand to his own shirt, unbuttoning it without looking away from Jensen's green gaze. He could see his boyfriend's breathing turn quicker when the shirt fell to the floor beside Jensen's.

"I need you," Jensen pleaded. "Please Jared..."

"I... yeah.."Jared admitted, there was no way he could keep it slow, not with Jensen looking up at him need and want so evident in his eyes.

Jared leaned in to kiss over Jensen's hips, tongue tracing down to lick over the hard length of his cock before pushing Jensen's legs apart and fitting himself between them, sliding down until he could lick down below Jensen's balls and push his tongue against the boy's hole. The second his tongue found the tightly furled muscle, Jensen lifted his legs up to give Jared more room, offering himself up like the prettiest gift Jared had ever gotten.

"Damn..." he mumbled. "Love the way you taste."

A low keening left Jensen when Jared traced his tongue around the rim, pushing his tongue slightly inside to feel the addictive, dark taste of Jensen, opening the boy up. He felt Jensen shiver, the small ring fluttering around him when he pushed even deeper inside, his hands on Jensen's thighs to keep him in place. 

"Jared... I..." 

Jensen didn't say more, instead he felt the boy shift slightly and the next moment something dropped down beside Jared on the bed and he smiled when he pulled away enough to see bottle of lube on the comforter. 

"Get me ready," Jensen begged. " _Please_!"

"Yeah.. I'll just..."

Fumbling with the lube Jared managed to get two fingers slicked up and when he pressed the tips of his fingers against Jensen's opening he felt the boy shiver and just push down quickly, burrowing both fingers inside him with one slide.

"Fuck, Jen!" Jared gasped. "Are you..."

Jensen's body was incredibly tight around him, inner walls fluttering as they got used to the sudden stretch but when Jared looked up at his boyfriend all he could see was an expression of pure pleasure. 

"God... yes... Want..."

Having Jensen lost for words was one of the hottest things Jared knew and he shifted his finger inside his boyfriend, searching for the small spot inside that he knew would have Jensen keening in pleasure.

"Yes... I love... please. More..."

Jared pulled his fingers out slowly, feeling Jensen's body clinging to his fingers like they were trying to keep him inside. He leaned back down and let his tongue lick over where Jensen's body was stretched around his fingers. Pushing his tongue inside together with his fingers, Jared moaned, working Jensen open with sure strokes of his fingers. When he pushed a third finger inside Jensen was trembling, the muscles of his legs trembling when the boy worked himself down on Jared's fingers.

"I'm ready," Jensen mumbled. "Please... I..."

With one last lick, Jared pushed himself up on his knees, fingers still buried inside of Jensen while grabbed the lube with his other, managing to slick himself up without quitting working his fingers in and out of the boy. 

"I love you so much," he said, moving up to kiss Jensen and he felt the boy gasp into his mouth when he withdrew his fingers. "And I love... this..."

With one slow glide Jared pushed himself inside, feeling Jensen's body open up for him, perfect tight heat that welcomed him inside. None of them stopped kissing, instead the kisses shifted, turning more heated as Jared's hips worked his hard cock deep inside Jensen's ass with teasingly slow thrusts. To his surprise Jensen didn't beg for more, or for harder, instead he wrapped his legs around Jared's waist and held him close, arms wrapping around his neck.

"Love you too," Jensen mumbled into the kiss and his teeth dragged over Jard's lower lip. "Always so... oh god... yes..."

A full body shiver ran through Jared's body when Jensen trembled beneath him, Jared's cock dragging over the boy's prostate to pull moan after moan from his full lips. Their bodies moved together perfectly, so many years of fucking and making love that they didn't even think about it anymore, they just _fit_. Jared let his lips drag down to Jensen's neck again, kissing each spot that he knew would drive Jensen crazy with pleasure until the boy was almost sobbing, writhing under Jared but still not asking for anything more than Jared was giving him. 

"Yeah, just like this..." Jared moaned. "Want you to come... just like this. Just my cock inside your perfect ass... Come for me, Jen."

He didn't know if he really had expected Jensen to do as he said, but it seemed like that small command was all that the boy needed to push him over the edge. Jared pulled away from the kiss then, because he wanted, _needed_ , to watch Jensen fall apart beneath him. It was a sight he would never get tired of, full lips parted and eyes glazed over by the pure bliss of his orgasm. Jensen's body spasmed around him, muscles squeezing him so tight that there was no way for Jared to hold back his own orgasm and he came inside Jensen, falling back down to muffle his own scream of pleasure against his boyfriend's neck. 

With Jensen's hole still fluttering around him, each circling of his hips and hard trusts of Jared's making a wet, almost obscene sound, Jared felt his orgasm drag out longer than it ever had before, and by the time it subsided he rolled them around, staying inside of Jensen but instead with his lover on top of him, lips connected once more. 

"I don't wanna go back home," Jensen mumbled when they both had finally managed to catch their breath "This, right here? It's perfect. It's all I want."

"San Fransisco?" Jared asked and pushed a sweat damp lock of hair from Jensen's face. 

"No," Jensen said with a soft smile. "You."

-¤-


	11. The Coming Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen is legal, and school is just a few weeks away. It's time to come clean...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Age difference (Jensen 18, Jared 28), mentions of past underage

-¤-

Jared stood looking out of the window, with the apartment building right at the edge of the sprawling campus he had a wonderful view of the school as well as the wide expanse of Lake Merced Park on the other side. Standing there he could easily imagine watching Jensen coming home from school, the two of them taking the dogs outside for long hours in the sun. His life wasn't much what he had expected it to be when he first left Texas to go to college. For one, he hadn't imagined staying in the town he studied in, but more than anything he hadn't expected something like the thing he had with Jensen. 

He turned away from the window and looked at the big room that was the master bedroom, a brand new California King standing with the headboard between the two wide windows that bathed white sheets in warm sunlight. Having spent the better part of the day talking to the people at the new site for the deli, Jared already felt drained although it only was afternoon and he allowed himself to sink down on the bed, closing his eyes and wishing that his boyfriend was there with him. It didn't take him many minutes before he reached for his phone and he was smiling slightly when he dialed Jensen's number. 

"Hey," Jensen's voice came over the line "How is California?"

"Sunny," Jared said, smile growing wider. "But everything is set and I will head back home tomorrow and pack the last thing up before...yeah."

"Before it's time for the big move," Jensen said softly. 

Jared wasn't stupid, and after years of being with the boy he was quite sure there was something up but he also knew that it wasn't something that should be talked about over the phone. There was no doubt in his mind that Jensen was scared of telling his family and Jared was quite scared himself. Jensen's family _liked_ him but he was very sure that little thing would change within a week. 

"Yeah," Jared said with a low sigh. "I think we need to talk about that, but not until I'm home. For now we should talk about how wonderful this apartment is."

"I like this plan of yours," Jensen laughed. "You like it? The apartment I mean?"

"We were so lucky to get this place," Jared said, looking around the bedroom. "It's perfect for us, and not too far from the park so I'm quite sure Harley and Sadie will love it as well."

He heard the small hitch in Jensen's breathing at the talk of _we_ and _us_ and he wished he could see his boyfriend at that moment, knowing full well how happy he would look as well as the pretty shade of pink his cheeks would take. 

"It'll be amazing," Jensen breathed out and Jared heard a soft rustling of fabric in the background and a sound that he knew full well was the protesting sound of his own bed's springs.

"Are you in bed?" Jared asked. " _My_ bed?"

"Mmmm," Jensen answered. "I was out with the dogs and now I'm here. Being lazy. It almost feels weird to be here with no Chad around to avoid. You know, I'll miss this house. This basement."

"I'll miss it as well," Jared admitted. "But you know we have to leave."

"Remember the first time I came here?" Jensen asked and Jared heard the teasing tilt to his voice. 

It didn't take much for Jared to remember just exactly how Jensen had looked when Jared opened the backdoor, small figure dressed in a Scooby Doo t-shirt that Jared had been sad to see the boy grow out of. 

"You were so small," Jared breathed out, the memory still affecting him so much even with the years and new memories that they had built up. "And those R2D2 pajama pants, I kinda miss them."

"You're a great, big perv," Jensen said with a brilliant laugh. 

"Not anymore," Jared answered. "You're all legal now, all legal and all mine."

"So it doesn't turn you on to think about it anymore?" Jensen asked and Jared felt his cock harden in the confines of his jeans at the tone of Jensen's voice. "The way you could so easily manhandle me. If I remember correctly you even had a thing about my tooth paste, always loved kissing me when..."

Jared fumbled his pants open and down his hips at the sound of Jensen's words, the boy knowing just what buttons to push and Jared smiled at how well they knew each other.

"I think _you're_ the one with the size kink," Jared pointed out. "Me holding you up so easily, spreading your legs to just take you."

On the other end of the line he heard Jensen moan softly and it amazed Jared that after all the time they had spent together he could hear the change in the boy's breathing that he knew meant Jensen's hand had found its way in under his clothing. 

"Are you touching yourself?" Jared asked, wrapping his fingers around his cock. 

"Wish it was you," Jensen said on a soft moan. "Your hands on me, fuck. Your huge hands."

Slowly stroking the length of his cock Jared smiled as he imagined what Jensen would look like, slender body stretched up on Jared's bed, sun tanned skin on display.

"Wish that as well," Jared said, his fingers brushing the sensitive underside of his cock. "I'd kiss you, and then I'd put you on all fours, make you do that sound you do when I lick you open."

"Jesus fuck," Jensen gasped.

"Would you like that, baby?" Jared asked. "Because I'm pretty sure I can make it happen once I get back home from California. Or... you know... once we get back _here_ we'll have this whole big apartment to Christen. You should see this bed I bought us..."

Jared let his hand drift down from his cock to stroke down over his sac, already pulled up tight to his body and when he heard Jensen moan and gasp at the other end, clearly beyond the capability of putting words together, he felt his orgasm slowly build, pleasure tangling up his spine with each brush of his fingers. 

"Jay... please..."

"C'mon Jen," Jared gasped. "Wanna hear you..."

"Jay... love..."

The rest of the boy's words drifted off into a cry that Jared knew so very well and he could just imagine what Jensen looked like lost in his orgasm, pretty cock pulsing out over his chest. Jared's own orgasm slammed into him and he moaned, hips rising up off the bed as his come spilled hot over his skin, pushed even higher with the sweet sounds that reached him from Jensen. None of them spoke long minutes, instead Jared just lay there listening as Jensen's breathing slowly calmed down, the two of them breathing in rhythm over the distance between them.

"I want to be there with you," Jensen breathed out.

"Yeah, I want that as well," Jared answered. "I know you have to live in the dorms but... damn, I look forward to all the nights you can get out of there and sleep here, with me."

"You're such a sap," Jensen chuckled softly. 

"Nah, I'm just horny," Jared smirked.

"Yeah, that as well," Jensen said and the smile was evident in his voice. "I can't wait to get to talk to you face to face, we need to talk about...fuck..."

"We need to talk about fucking?" Jared asked, reaching for a discarded t-shirt to swipe away the come already drying on his skin. 

"Jared," Jensen breathed out, suddenly serious. "I mean, we need to talk about... what happens when..."

Jared swallowed thickly at the tone of Jensen's voice, laced with fear and worry, the drawl of post-orgasm all but gone. 

"I know," he said softly. "I don't... Fuck. It'll be such mess.”

"It will be worth it," Jensen said but Jared could hear the undertone of question in the words.

"You and me, Jen," Jared said. "It will always be worth it. And maybe in time they'll..."

He knew that there was little chance Jensen's parents would ever be okay with the two of them, but it still was something he hoped for, not for his sake but for Jensen's.

"Yeah... maybe..." 

-¤-  
-¤-

Jensen stared down at the form in front of him, trying to understand what he saw but his brain  
didn't really want to comprehend what he was seeing.

"Housing forms?" he asked, staring at Chris who looked at him with a wide grin.

"Yup," Chris confirmed.

"You're going to SFSU?" Jensen asked.

"Their music program is awesome, so I figured…why not?" Chris said and sat down on the bench  
next to Jensen. "Just sign there, and there, and I'll send this in. We'll be roomies."

"Is this for real?"

"Can you stop talking in questions?" Chris said with a laugh. "Really Jen, we're best friends, no  
one I'd rather go to school with."

"Sap," Jensen said then but he was smiling so wide it hurt his jaw.

"Besides," Chris added with a smirk. "I kinda figured you will spend most of your time with Jared anyway, so it'll almost be like I have my own place."

Jensen smiled slightly at that, because he knew that it was the truth. After all, just hearing Jared talk about the apartment he had bought made Jensen long to be there with him and he couldn't wait until that evening when Jared would return home, having pictures to show Jensen. With little over one week left until Jared would get into the car and drive back to San Fransisco, Jensen knew that he needed to talk to his parents, and soon. But it was easier to spend another warm summer’s evening with Chris, pretending like his entire life wasn't about to change in mere days. 

"Jen?" 

It wasn't until Chris poked him in the side that Jensen was torn from his thoughts and he looked up to see Chris look at him with a frown on his face.

"Lost in thought, eh?" Chris asked, hint of worry in his voice. 

"Sorry," Jensen said. "It's just...you know... this is big. And I have _no_ idea how they will react. Or...well, I guess I do..."

"You don't think they'll take it well?" Chris asked softly.

With a sigh Jensen shifted until his back was resting against the headboard and he pulled his legs up against his chest.

"Would you?" he sighed. "No, I'm pretty fucking sure they'll freak actually. I'm not even sure I can blame them for it but... It's Jared. And you know... he's..."

"I think everyone that has ever seen you know two together knows," Chris said with a snort.

"Hah," Jensen said, knowing full well he sounded somewhat bitter. "So you and Chad then?"

"And everyone that saw you in San Fransisco," Chris said, proving just why he was Jensen's best friend.

"Thanks," Jensen said and he flicked the radio on when a comfortable silence settled in the room. 

"I just wonder if they'll even speak to me after they find out," Jensen said, making Chris look up from where he had been going through Jensen's movie collection."

"I don't think it's _you_ that you need to worry about," Chris pointed out.

Jensen bit down on his lower lip, practically gnawing at it as he thought about the truth in his friend's words. While his parents seemed to like Jared at the moment he was very sure that would end once they found out about the relationship and he barely dared to think about what they would say about Jensen going with Jared to San Fransisco several weeks before they thought he was really heading there. 

"This will be a mess," Jensen sighed. "I have _no_ how to tell them about this. And Josh, oh my...Josh will fucking flip."

"What will I flip about?"

Josh's voice rang out loud above the music and Jensen's head snapped up so hard his neck hurt, staring at his big brother who stood in the doorway, a steely expression on his face.

"You're not supposed to be home yet," Jensen said weakly, his heart beating a hundred miles a minute in his chest. 

"I got done sooner than I thought," Josh said, gaze locked on Jensen. "Now just what do you have to tell me that would make me flip?"

Jensen's mind raced, thoughts stumbling over each other and the silence between them was so heavy Jensen was almost surprised he couldn't see it hanging in the air. 

"Josh," he managed to get out, his hand fumbling for his phone before he could even think about it.

He _needed_ Jared there with him but he knew that the man still was in California, too far away to be any comfort to Jensen. 

"I...it's nothing," Jensen lied, even though he knew he wouldn't be able to keep it secret much longer. 

"Of course it is," Josh snapped, stepping into the room. "I'm your brother, Jensen, and even though you don't tell me things, it doesn't mean I'm not aware of things happening. You've been acting... weird, for months."

"I'm...uh... Josh. Look, it's not... I mean it _is_ but it's not what..."

"As far as comforting me, you're doing a piss poor job, little brother," Josh gritted out. "Chris, would you mind giving me and my brother some time? Alone."

"Jen?" Chris said, ignoring Josh and Jensen took a deep breath before nodding slowly. 

"Right," Chris said and stood up from the bed. "I'll just... go make a phone call then."

With one small smile from behind Josh's back Chris nodded and then he was out of the room, leaving Jensen and his big brother alone, facing each other and tension almost a palpable weight between them.

"What is it you're not telling me?" Josh asked, arms crossed over his chest.

A big part of Jensen _wanted_ to tell Josh, the same way he always had while they were growing up. Josh had always been the only one Jensen had felt comfortable to speak with, but then the thing with Jared had happened and suddenly Jensen was all too aware of just how much he had kept from his brother. 

"Josh," Jensen sighed. "Please don't ask, you won’t like the answer.” 

Some of the annoyance drained off Josh's face, replaced by a worry that made Jensen feel even worse about keeping things from him.

"Jen," Josh sighed. "What _is_ it with you lately? Fuck kiddo, talk to me already!"

It was something with Josh's choice of words that made something harden within Jensen, the way his brother still treated him like a child at times and even though he could understand it, he didn't like it. He didn't want to talk to Josh, didn't want to talk to _anyone_ but he knew that he was out of time, there was no way to push things to the future anymore.

"I met someone," Jensen said quietly. 

Josh looked utterly surprise, one eyebrow raised on that questioning way that Jensen himself had practiced in front of the mirror when he was younger.

"I'm not sure why that's a bad thing?" Josh said but there was a lot of doubt in his voice. "I mean, we've _all_ just waited for you to _finally_ start dating. It's about time you find yourself a girl."

Jensen's belly dropped at those words, a big part of him had hoped that his family would have realized at least one part of why there hadn't been any _girls_ in Jensen's life, but apparently that was too much to ask for. 

"It's not.." Jensen started, and then he took a deep breath to steady himself, at least the first part wouldn't be the hardest thing to tell. "A girl. It's not... I mean. It's a guy."

Josh's lips parted but no word came out, instead he closed his mouth again, lips pressed together into a hard line and Jensen prepared for the worst, maybe his family would explode from that little fact alone. Josh took a deep breath, closing his eyes and he lifted one hand to drag it through his hair and he didn't open his eyes when he spoke again.

"You're gay?" Josh asked, voice sounding slightly strained. 

"Yeah," Jensen admitted.

At that small confirmation Josh leaned heavy against the wall, blinking his eyes open and looking at Jensen. 

"Why have you never told me?"

There wasn't really a good answer to that question because Jensen had been so busy hiding Jared that he didn't think about what other things he had been hiding. 

"It just never seemed right?" Jensen said, question in his voice. 

It was obvious Josh knew him all too well, despite his time away at college, because his eyes narrowed and it seemed he heard every word Jensen wasn't saying. 

"Why?" Josh asked, voice turning slightly steely. 

Jensen fidgeted on the bed, one hand drifting down to his pocket where his phone rested and he was longing to call Jared, just to hear his boyfriend's voice for a moment. 

"Josh," Jensen said tiredly. 

"No!" Josh snapped. "You've been hiding whatever is from me, from _all_ of us. Now _tell_ me!"

Jensen flinched at the sudden anger in Josh's voice but it didn't really surprise him either, Josh had never been one to like when Jensen kept secrets even when they were small and he had already guessed that Josh would come down hard on him. Just when Jensen was about to open his mouth they heard a car down in the driveway and Jensen spun around to the window, seeing his parents getting out of the car.

"Jesus, God damn fucking Christ," he muttered.

"Jensen!" Josh gasped, his eyes wide in surprise. 

At that moment Jensen realized how little time he had truly spent with his big brother if a few well chosen curse words could surprise Josh that much, but apparently Josh still saw him as the perfect little boyscout. 

"Shit. Josh, please. Don't tell them," Jensen pleaded. "I can't.. not yet. Just _please_!”

He saw Josh hesitate but then his brother nodded and took a step back and Jensen knew that Josh backing off now would make his brother even angrier once he found out the truth but that was something Jensen could deal with then. Something he was ready to face the next morning when Jared was back in town and Jensen would have somewhere to go when it all exploded because there was no doubt in his mind that it would explode. 

-¤-

\- _What was it you wanted to talk to me about?_ -

Jensen looked down at his phone, spinning it round and round between his fingers as he bit on his lower lip, trying to gather himself together. He had several messages from Chris as well, and he had no real idea how he had managed to calm his friend enough to back off for the moment but he was grateful for it. Support was one thing but Chris mainly managed to get Jensen even more worried with his constant questions. With Jared back though, Jensen knew it was time to come clean and he needed to do it soon or Jared would insist on being there for it and that just wasn't an option in Jensen's mind. 

\- _I'll come over later, talk then. Love you_ \- 

He dropped the phone on the bed and started moving around the room, silently putting some clothes down into a bag before adding some of his personal items that he wanted to bring with him. Packing his things like that made his heart ache and he had tears in his eyes but he was very sure that come that evening he wouldn't be living with his parents anymore. It was something he had known for quite some time, a part of the big picture that he thought he had accepted but being so close to the reveal he wasn't sure he could ever have really been prepared for it all. A few books were added on top of his bag before he put his Kindle in and closed the bag shut, looking around the room with so many things gone that had made it _his_.

\- _Love you too. And I might have California gifts for you._ -

Jensen wasn't really surprised when he felt his lips tug up into a smile, there was a reason he was willing to give so much up for Jared after all, no one else made him feel as good and as _whole_ as Jared did. With that knowledge a comforting warmth inside him he put his bag down at the door to his bedroom and took a deep breath before opening the door and heading down to the living room where he could hear his parents move around. He stopped just outside the door and listened his parents talking and his belly dropped when he heard Josh's voice as well but there was no way he was backing out from what he was about to do. Instead he took a step forward and stepped into the living room.

Josh fell silent the second he saw Jensen in the doorway and his parents turned around to face him with smiles on their lips. Those smiles faded away quickly though and Jensen realized he must look just as nervous as he felt because both his parents looked from him, to Josh and then back to Jensen once more, clearly picking up on the heavy tension between the brothers. 

"Jensen?" Alan asked, standing up from his spot on the couch. "What is it?"

The question made Jensen want to turn around and flee, run all the way to Jared's house and curl up on Jared's bed together with Harley and Sadie but he knew that wasn't an option so instead he took another small step forward. 

"I've...it's... I've met someone," Jensen said quickly, almost tripping over the words in his haste to get them out.

His parents both looked surprised but the small smiles were back and Jensen had no idea to say what he knew needed to be said.

"Who is it?" Alan asked.

"Do we know her?" his mother asked, an eager tone to her voice that made Jensen want to flinch away.

Josh remained silent but he stared with Jensen and Jensen pulled in a deep breath before he went on.

"Yes, you know him," he said so quietly he almost didn't expect his parents to hear. 

He saw the very moment his parents understood the words he had spoken, his father's mouth falling open and Donna let out a surprised little gasp. It was Josh that found his words first though.

"Wait, they _know_ him?" he asked and Jensen knew in that moment that his brother was very close to putting all the pieces together. 

"Him?" his mother asked and the tone of her voice made Jensen flinch. "What do you mean _him_?”

"This is nothing to joke about," his father said, sounding slightly annoyed.

Jensen looked over to where Josh was standing but he wasn't surprised when his brother moved to stand closer to their parents.

"Him," Jensen said with as much determination as he could muster. "I have a boyfriend. I'm... gay."

The silence was so heavy that Jensen thought it should be visible, a heavy blanket laying over the room as he waited for his parents to react, to say _anything_. Alan sank back down on the couch with a heavy sigh, not even looking at Jensen so instead he turned to his mother who was staring at him open-mouthed.

"No," she said with a firm shake of her head. "Of course you're not."

"Mom," he started but Donna interrupted him.

"I said no, you're _not_ gay. I didn't raise you to be like that. You're a good kid Jensen, the Boyscouts and all that. A _good_ kid."

Things were falling apart faster than Jensen had expected them to and he had to swallow down the hard lump in his throat before he could speak again. 

"I am, mom," he managed to get out. "And I'm leaving for San Fransisco."

"What does that have to do with..." his brother started but then he seemed to realize something. " _That_ is why you wanted to go there?"

"No, not only," Jensen said quickly. "But...yes. I guess that, yes. Plus, it means I'll be close to my boyfriend even though I didn't know that when..."

"Boyfriend?" Donna snapped quickly. "You have a _boyfriend_ in San Fransisco? I knew we shouldn't have let you go there with Mr. Padalecki. That town corrupted my sweet boy, it's not right. Not right at all."

She sat down next to his father and Jensen found himself face to face with Josh, who's cheeks were heated in anger and his green eyes blazed as he looked at Jensen. 

"Did you meet him when you went there?" Josh asked. 

That was something he had thought about, the explanation as to when he and Jared had started dating and he knew he had a good alibi for it all starting so he took a deep breath and started in on the words he had practiced for hours and hours until they sounded true falling from his lips. 

"In a way," he said, seeing Josh's eyes narrow. 

Neither of his parents were talking, Donna just sat wringing her hands together without watching Jensen at all. 

"Jensen," Josh said in a tone that was upset enough to make both their parents look up. "Stop fucking hiding stuff from me!"

That fact that Donna didn't even flinch at the curse word had Jensen realizing just how badly things were turning out and yet he wasn't really surprised, he should have known that his mother would never be able to accept certain parts of him. Jensen decided it was just best to get the words out, to make his family know and then it would be done with.

"Jared is my boyfriend."

If he thought the room had been silent earlier it was nothing compared to what answered him once he managed to get the words out and when he looked up from his own feet he saw everyone frozen and staring at him.

"What?" Josh gasped finally, breaking the too heavy silence. 

"Mr. Padalecki?" Donna got out. "That vile man perverted my baby?"

The hurt and fear coiling inside Jensen gave way at that moment, replaced by a rising anger as he saw the disgusted look on his mother's face and the perfectly blank one on his father's. Josh face had paled and his brother stood with both hands balled up into fists. 

"Jensen," Josh protested. "He's...what, thirty?"

"Twenty-eight," Jensen said a bit too quickly. 

"Right, and that makes it better? Can't you see that he's corrupting you? Using you. He's fucking breaking the law, Jensen. A god damn child moles..."

"Don't you dare!" Jensen snapped before he could get the word out, hard enough for them all to stare at him in utter shock. "Don't you talk about Jared like that. He's not breaking any laws at all, I'm eighteen now, remember?"

"I made you dogsit for him," Donna said, voice barely holding. "And this is what he does? He perverted you like this!"

"He didn't _pervert_ me!" Jensen almost screamed. "I love him, and come Monday I'm going with him to San Fransisco."

"What? Monday?"

It was Donna who managed to find her voice first as she took a step closer to Jensen, reaching out for him. Jensen took a quick step back, for the first time in his life not wanting his mother's comforting touch. 

"School doesn't start for several weeks yet," Josh pointed out. "Why would you go there now?"

"Jensen, stop this nonsense," Alan said, standing up and using the voice that Jensen had bowed down to so many times during his younger years.

"Yes," Donna agreed. "Just stop this tasteless joking and let's all forget this ever happened."

Looking over at Josh he could see on his brother's face that the man knew full well that Jensen wasn't making anything up and for a moment he thought that his brother would say something, maybe even stand up for Jensen but instead his brother glared daggers at him. 

"It's not a joke," Jensen said, biting back his tears. "I'm leaving with Jared. I'll stay in his apartment until school starts up. He's the one I want to be with. I _need_ to be with him."

Before either of them could say anything else Jensen turned around and ran up to his room, only stopping long enough to grab his bag before he fled down the stairs once more, afraid of what his parents would say and do, but before he reached the door he heard his brother speak up behind him.

"This isn't right, I'm not gonna let him get away with this," Josh said angrily. "I'm not fucking stupid, Jensen, I _know_ this started before you turned eighteen and I'll find proof of it!"

"It started when I was eighteen," Jensen said as firmly as he could manage. "Now get away from me, I'm going to Jared's. I'll make someone I know pick up my stuff in a day or two."

"You're choosing some pervert over your family?" Josh spat.

Jensen stopped, hand on the door knob, and turned to look at where Josh was standing.

"Do you think being gay is wrong? Will I burn in hell for it?" Jensen asked.

"No, and I don't think mom and dad do either but this is _wrong_. You have to see that. He's just using you for an easy fuck and you're too stupid to see it."

To his own surprise Jensen burst out laughing and he saw his brother's eyes go wide at the unusual reaction.

"He's moving to San Fransisco to be with _me_ ," Jensen said. "And he makes me feel good. So yeah, you know what? If I have to choose, I'm choosing him."

-¤-  
-¤-

Jared looked down at the photo album in his hands, stroking his fingers over the cover but he didn't open it.

"Don’t wanna take a break to look at pictures?" Chad said, looking over at Jared from where he was pulling DVDs out of the shelf and putting them into one of the moving boxes. 

"Not really, no," Jared said and put the album down in a box. "It's just weird to look at it, six years and I have...what, one, two pictures of Jensen?"

Chad put away the last of he DVDs and shifted over to start going through Jared's quite extensive CD collection instead but he stopped to look up at Jared with a pained expression on his face.

" _Please_ don't remind me how long you two have been together," he sighed. "You know I'm okay with you two now but... Fuck, Jay. He was _twelve_.”

"Yeah. That might be a part of our _how we met_ story that we won’t tell people," Jared said with a soft laugh.

"Good call," Chad grumbled. "What will you tell his parents? And your parents later on? Once in San Fransisco I doubt you can, or want to, keep him a secret from them."

"I'm never keeping Jen a secret again," Jared said firmly and pulled a few books from the shelf in front of him. 

Looking around the house he had no real idea how he and Chad were supposed to have it all packed in time for the moving van but he was truly grateful that Chad had agreed to help out. Even Kenzie had come to help and even though she had left for work after only a few hours she had made wonders with packing down some of the more fragile items. 

It looked like Chad was just about to say something when they heard the front door being unlocked and Jared couldn't keep his smile back when he heard familiar footsteps. The smile faded away, though, when Jensen didn't enter the room and instead they heard a loud thump from the hallway, following by what sounded like sobbing. Both Jared and Chad were in motion in an instant but Jared froze in place when he came in view of Jensen, the boy leaning heavily against the wall with a big bag at his feet and tears running down his cheeks. 

"Jensen!"

His boyfriend looked up at him, eyes already red-rimmed and slightly puffy and in a second Jared found himself with his arms full, Jensen arms coming up around his neck as the boy cried against his chest. Jared looked over at his best friend and saw Chad looking down at the bag on the floor with a sad expression on his face.

"He told them," Chad said with a sigh.

The pieces clicked together then, the crying boy in his arms and the bag laying discarded on the floor and Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen's waist, holding him closer and stroking soothing circles over his back.

"Oh Jen," he mumbled against his boyfriend's soft hair. "Why did you do it yourself? I could've been there for you. We were supposed to do it together."

"H-had t-to," Jensen managed to get out between sobs and Jared felt like his heart was breaking. "Josh found out."

Chad hissed in a breath but then he moved to grab Jensen's bag and carried it towards the downstairs bedroom that Jared still favored even when he lived alone in the house. Jared was grateful for his friend giving them some time alone, even though it didn't look like Jensen was calming down enough to talk anytime soon. Carefully Jared guided Jensen to the couch, helping the boy get out of his sneakers before he pulled him up close to his body and held him close while Jensen's whole body was shaking with deep sobs. 

"I'm so sorry," he whispered softly. "I should've been there for you. I never meant for you to do this alone, Jen."

Jensen clung to him so tightly that Jared knew he would have bruises to show for it and slowly the sobs started to calm down, even though Jensen was still trembling, pressed up as close as possible. Jared had no idea how long they had been sitting like that, all wrapped up in each other while he waited for Jensen to calm down enough to explain what had happened. 

"How is he?" 

Chad stood at the door to the basement, gaze flickering from Jared to Jensen time and time again, worry was clear on his face. Sometimes Jared almost forgot that Jensen had been a part of Chad's life for three years, that his friend actually cared for Jensen quite a bit. 

"I don't know," Jared sighed and stroked his fingers through the soft hairs at Jensen's neck. 

"I'm okay," Jensen mumbled, face still hidden against Jared's neck. 

"I'm pretty sure this is far from _okay_ , kid," Chad said, walking over to sit down next to them on the couch. "I put your bag in the bedroom, unpacked most of it since you two wont leave for another few days."

Jared managed a smile for his friend before Jensen took a deep breath and shifted around, still curled close to Jared but instead sitting so he could actually look between Jared and Chad. 

"They didn't throw me out," Jensen said, voice still sounding shaky and rough from crying. "So there's that."

"Jen," Jared said, lifting to boy's face up until he could press a soft kiss to his lips. "If they didn't throw you out... why are you here?"

"I left," Jensen said, gaze falling down to where his fingers were playing with the hem of his t-shirt. "I... God, Josh was _so_ angry...the things he said... You're not..."

Jared could only imagine what Josh had to say about him, and he was pretty sure none of it was good. He couldn't even blame the man, he would probably have acted the same way but at the same time it hurt him to see Jensen so heartbroken.

"And mom and dad," Jensen whispered. "They... I think they were more upset about me being gay than...about us. Mom said you corrupted me."

Chad let out a low snort that had both Jared and Jensen looking over at him in surprise and Jared raised a questioning eyebrow. 

"I'm sorry," Chad said. "But that's just...well, it's just funny. I may not know much about how you met, and I don't _want_ to know all that much but... wasn't Jensen the one coming after _you_?"

A low sound escaped Jensen, something between a laugh and a sob and a small smile tugged at Jared's lip as well. Jensen might be hurting more than Jared had ever seen him do before, but Jared knew his boyfriend was strong and he was sure Jensen would be okay. In time. 

-¤-

"It's okay. I'll be okay."

Jared wrapped one arm around Jensen's waist and pulled the boy closer, pulling the sheet over the both of them and even with all that had gone down the day before he relaxed at the feel of Jensen stretched out beside him.

"I know," Jared said. "I'm just... Jen, I'm so sorry it turned out like this. Are you sure you want to go through with this? I mean... it would be easier for you if..."

"No!" Jensen said quickly, pushing himself up to sitting and Jared's eyes trailed down over his body when the sheet fell down to pool around his hips. "Don't you fucking dare, Jared."

Jared was about to say something but then Jensen moved to straddle him, legs on either side of Jared's waist and his hands balanced against Jared's chest.

"You do _not_ get to pull this again," he said firmly. "Yes, this hurts, it hurts so fucking much, but I knew it would happen. I chose this. I chose _you_.

"Jen," Jared breathed out, his hands moving up to grip his boyfriend's hips.

"And who knows," Jensen said. "Maybe they'll come around, some day."

Jared could tell from the tone of Jensen's voice that the boy didn't really believe his own words but Jared did hope he was right anyway, he didn't want Jensen to lose all of his family. The position of Jensen on top of him made him want to do more, feel the soft skin under his fingers but before he could do anything they heard Chad call for them.

"Boys, get up, we’ve got packing to do!"

"Why did we let him sleep over?" Jared said with a sigh before pulling Jensen in for a deep kiss before they reluctantly got up.

Watching Jensen get dressed Jared could still see the tension in his boyfriend's body, hurt and anger still hiding beneath the surface even though Jensen seemed to be fighting to keep it hidden. Jared sighed as he watched Jensen climb the stairs but he was sure Jensen would be ready to talk to him sooner or later and he knew better than to push before he was ready. Instead he pulled on his own clothes and followed Jensen upstairs and into the kitchen where Chad was making waffles.

"You can cook?" Jared said, feigning shock. "Why didn't you ever tell me when you lived here?"

"Self defense?" Chad suggested."I've seen you eat, no way I want to cook for you every day. I leave that to the kid."

"Seriously Chad," Jensen said and sat down at the table. "I'm eighteen, I'm _not_ a kid anymore.” 

Jared could see the smart ass comment lingering on Chad's tongue when the door bell rang out, startling all three of them. Before either of them could get him it rang once more, followed by several more loud chimes in quick succession that had them all looking at each other in surprise. Jensen was the first one to move, reaching the front door with Jared and Chad close behind and Jared spared a brief thought to how much he liked Jensen opening the door in his home. All happy thoughts faded away when Jared saw the man on the other side of the door, a man who glared daggers at Jared as he pushed past Jensen.

"Joshua Ackles," Jared said, hoping the man didn't hear how strained Jared's voice sounded. 

It didn't seem like Josh was listening to what Jared was saying though, instead he stepped closer until he was standing just one step away from Jared. With Josh that close Jared realized that the man was barely as tall as Jensen and Jared practically towered over him, he saw Josh's eyes go wide and he swallowed when he realized the same him. Despite the surprise Josh gathered himself together rather quickly and Jared found himself face to face with a really angry older brother. 

"You perverted son of a bitch," Josh growled, stepping up until they were almost chest to chest. "I will _end_ you. How the fucking hell could you do something like this? I don't want you anywhere near my brother ever again, you hear me?"

Suddenly it was quite obvious what Jensen had meant when he hinted about the things Josh had said, but having them thrown in his face like that almost made Jared stagger back. He managed to stand his ground under the assault of vitriol though. 

"Josh, don't..." Jensen started but he was cut off by his brother.

"No, you keep the fuck silent," Josh snapped and Jared felt anger boil hot inside him. "I love you Jen, but your judgement clearly sucks."

Jared saw Jensen's mouth fall open in shock and he couldn't blame his boyfriend, even if he did understand why Josh was upset, he felt like hurting the man for the way he talked to Jensen. 

"And you," Josh said, turning back to Jared. "You will not see my little brother again, _ever_ , or so help me I'll call the cops on you, you fucking..."

"No," Jensen cried out, sounding desperate and he reached out to grab his brother's arm and it looked like he was trying to pull Josh away from Jared.

Before Jared could even react Josh spun around to push Jensen away and Jensen stumbled a few steps backwards before he tripped over the threshold and fell flat on his back, his head hitting the floor with a sound that made Jared's blood go cold. Both Jared and Chad quickly pushed past Josh, ignoring his stumbling excuse and Jared carefully helped Jensen up.

"Are you hurt, Jen?" he asked softly, stroking his fingers up through Jensen's hair to check for blood. 

Jensen hissed when Jared's fingers found the place where he had hit the floor and that was enough for Jared to carefully pass Jensen over to Chad before he stood up and glared at Josh. The man had common sense enough to take a quick step back and Jared clenched his hands into fists.

"I didn't mean to push him," Josh said quickly.

"I know what you think of me," Jared said, forcing his voice to stay calm. "I'm quite aware of the fact that you hate me and part of me thinks you're entitled. But you do _not_ hurt Jensen, you hear me?"

"Jared, I'm okay," Jensen said and got up to his feet, one hand against the back of his head. "He didn't... It's not so bad."

"I should call the police and have him arrested," Jared snapped.

Those words seemed to bring the fight back to Josh who practically snarled at Jared.

"You do that, and we'll see just what they say about what you've done to my brother!"

Jared was sure Jensen would say something but to his surprise it was Chad's voice that rang out, making the other three turn to look at him.

"Oh yeah, I totally see how the police will be utterly upset about Jared and his _legal_ boyfriend. What ever will they do," Chad said, sarcasm dripping from each word. 

Jensen's eyes went wide and he looked over to Jared quickly but Jared could only shrug in response. Even knowing that Chad cared about Jensen he hadn't expected the man to come to their defence like that, speaking up for them when he had once accused Jared of almost the same as Josh did. 

"Don't be stupid," Josh snapped. "I know my brother, and I fucking know this has gone on longer. It's sick, how can you just stand there and be okay with it?"

"It happened in San Fransisco," Jensen said, letting his hand fall from his head and he raised his chin defiantly as he looked to his big brother. "And _I_ was the one making it happen."

Not a single hint of hesitation could be heard as the lie slid off Jensen's lips and Jared was bit impressed and slightly intimidated by how easily Jensen could lie, but then he himself would say anything to keep him and Jensen safe. He turned away from Josh, anger draining away and instead he needed to be close to Jensen once more and he wrapped his arms around the boy's waist. 

"Are you sure you're okay, baby?" he asked, ignoring Josh in favor of pressing a kiss to Jensen's forehead. 

"I will be," Jensen answered quietly, one hand resting on Jared's hip. 

Jensen tilted his head back, looking up at Jared and he didn't really think about it before he leaned in and captured Jensen's mouth in a slow, tender kiss. 

"God fucking damnit," Josh gasped. "Fuck, so wrong. Get your hands off my little brother!"

Jared was about to pull back but then Jensen's hands came up to tangle in his hair, holding him still and instead deepening the kiss, his tongue sliding hot and perfect over Jared's until all he could think of was kissing Jensen. 

"And that's why I'm on their side," Jared heard Chad say. "And if you can't recognize love when you see it, then get the fuck out of here!"

"Love? That's not love," Josh spat. "That's sick and vile and..."

The kiss ended and Jensen looked over to his boyfriend, the anguish clear as day on his face but he didn't say anything for a long time. 

"I'm not giving Jared up," Jensen said quietly. "I'm sorry Josh. If you can ever accept it, please..."

"I'm never gonna accept this!" Josh said angrily and then the air seemed to go out of him a bit. "Jensen, I love you. Your whole family loves you. But _he_ can not be a part of this."

Jensen closed his eyes and Jared could see the tears his boyfriend was trying to hold back, white teeth biting down so hard on his lower lip that Jared almost expected to see blood. 

"Right," Chad said firmly. "That's it, you get the _fuck_ out of here."

He shoved Josh hard towards the door and for a moment Jared almost expected the man to fall just like his little brother had but Josh managed to steady himself with one hand on the door frame. 

"You're seriously kicking me out?" Josh gasped. "What the hell? What kind of person _are_ you?"

"A good friend," Chad said angrily. "And you have hurt my friends enough, I want you out of here."

"The police will hear of this" Josh said when Chad pushed him out the door. 

"I'm legal, Josh," Jensen pointed out. "Nothing happened before that."

Josh didn't get another word out before Chad slammed the door in his face and tuned to look at where Jared was still holding Jensen in his arms. 

"Well, fuck me," Chad breathed out and leaned back against the door. 

Jensen didn't sat anything he just cried silently, face hidden against Jared's neck and all Jared could do was hold him while Jensen let all the pain out. 

-¤-

The living room was mostly empty, only the heavy furniture still in their place but most of Jared's life had been neatly packed into boxes and bags, ready for the big moving van to arrive the following day. Even Jensen's bags were packed and waiting by the door thanks to Chris who obviously had no problems walking right by Jensen's parents to fetch his remaining stuff. Jared knew there was a reason he had always liked Chris. The house felt strangely empty and each step he took echoed in a way it never had before. Slowly Jared walked through the room towards where the patio doors stood wide open, letting in a soft summers breeze as well as the sound of Chad, Chris and Jensen arguing about something while they all waited for the barbecue to reach the right temperature. He stopped in the doorway and looked outside, taking in Chad who was standing next to the grill and waving a grill fork around in the air while Chris and Jensen both looked like they would rather move away to avoid bodily harm. 

"I'm just saying, the guy clearly was insane. Wasn't he pretty much a certified crazy ass?" Chad said. "I mean, you just see his paintings and you _know_ that something just wasn't right, you know. And you wanna hang his stuff on the walls? Kid, you're psycho."

Jared stepped outside and Jensen turned around to face him, a small smile on his lips and for the first time in days his eyes didn't seem red and puffy from crying.

"Chad doesn't approve of my Salvador Dalí posters," Jensen said, shifting forward on the lounge chair he had been sitting on.

Sitting down besides his boyfriend Jared pulled Jensen close, feeling the boy's back against his chest and he smiled when Jensen relaxed back against him.

"Chad only believes in art that is somehow sexually related," Jared said, grinning when Chris laughed and Chad gave him the finger. 

"Huh," Jensen said. "Dalí made a painting called The Great Masturbator. Does that count?"

Chad looked like he was about to answer but just then someone cleared their voice from the small side door that connected the fenced in backyard to the front of the house. They all spun around and Jared's jaw dropped when he saw Kristen standing there, slightly wide eyed.

"Kristen," he gasped. 

In his arms Jensen tensed up and Jared didn't know if it was because of the sudden appearance of someone unknown or because he remembered Kristen from their brief meeting so many years ago. Jared managed to keep himself from pulling away from the boy in his arms, instead he held Jensen still when the boy squirmed slightly and he was able to produce a smile.

"Hey, what... I didn't know you were coming," he said.

"I figured," Kristen said. "You promised me I would meet your boyfriend once school was out, and school is out. So I'm here, thought it was the last moment since you only met me alone and now you're leaving town."

He wasn't really all that surprised, he should have known that Kristen would remember his promise to introduce her to his boyfriend even though Jared himself had mostly forgotten about it. 

"Right," he said slowly and gave Chris and Chad a quick glance before standing up and pulling Jensen with him. "This is Jensen, my boyfriend."

Kristen's smile was brilliant, her hair shining golden in the slowly setting sun as she crossed over the lawn to where they were standing. Jensen stood with one arm around Jared's waist, the other one raised in a little wave.

"Oh my _god_ ," Kristen exclaimed when she got closer and got a good look of Jensen. 

Jensen tried to step back but Jared held him in place, true to his promise of never hiding Jensen ever again even if it meant he would have a fallout with his friends. 

"You're gorgeous!" Kristen went on. "And now I feel like a cougar for even saying that, Jesus. Last time I saw you, you were in that adorable little boyscout uniform."

That quickly answered the question if Kristen remembered Jensen or not but Jared still had a hard time understanding why his friend wasn't freaking out. Looking down at Jensen he saw that his cheeks were stained red and he coughed, looking up at Jared from under long eyelashes. 

"You're...taking this very calmly," Jared pointed out.

Kristen laughed and walked over to where they were standing, reaching up to press a kiss to Jared's cheek before she turned to Jensen.

-¤-  
-¤-

The girl looked on him, curiosity in her blue eyes but all Jensen could think of was the way he had felt those years earlier when he had thought that Kristen was Jared's girlfriend and he didn't really know how to react. It wasn't a choice he needed to make, though, because Kristen stepped close and gave him a quick hug

"Hey Jensen," Kristen said softly. "I'm so happy to _finally_ meet you."

She gave Jared a pointed look that had Jensen smiling despite himself and he took a step closer to his boyfriend, smiling when Jared wrapped an arm around him once more. Jensen wondered how long it would take him to actually get used to Jared touching him like that, showing off their relationship in each touch. It made some of the hurt inside fade away slowly. 

"Thank you," Jared said, tugging Jensen even closer.

"Oh, nothing to thank me for," Kristen said. "After all, I've had months to imagine all the horrible reasons why you didn't want to tell me. Your boy being on the young side, not the worst I had imagined."

Chad burst out laughing at that and Chris snorted out a laugh as well, making Jensen hope that no one would ask just what those things had been because he was pretty sure he didn't want to know. 

"Hey, food!" Kristen said, looking past them to where Chad was still twirling the grill fork back and forth.

"My food," Chad protested. "You were not invited."

"What? You said I should..." 

She fell silent when the both of them clearly realized what they had said, looking a bit sheepish and Jensen felt Jared sigh against his hair.

"I'm not even surprised," Jared said, sounding amused. "Of course Chad sold me out. He’s got a weird idea of being supportive. But yeah, sit down Kristen, I think we can feed you, little bird."

The others walked over to the table and chairs, Kristen checking out the tray of homemade hamburgers with an approving nod. Looking at the group of people Jensen was almost sad they would be leaving town the following day because what he had right then and there was so perfect. He felt Jared's gaze on him and saw his boyfriend raise an eyebrow before holding out one hand to Jensen and he was smiling when he closed the space between them, not feeling weird about it when he sat down on Jared's lap and watched their friends prepare the dinner. 

-¤-

"That's it, all of it," Jared said and Jensen turned around to look at where the man was waiting for him.

His voice echoed in the empty house and Jensen nodded, taking a deep breath before he grabbed his backpack, the very last item and followed Jared outside to the waiting car. None of them spoke as they loaded the last items into the car and got inside but Jensen knew that Jared was watching as he turned around to look back at the house where he had grown up and he wondered if it was just his imagination when he thought he saw movement in one of the windows. He wondered if it was his family watching him leaving, if they were even sad to see him go. 

He knew that Jared wanted to say something but he was grateful for the man resisting the urge because Jensen wasn't sure he could deal in that very moment. Taking a few deep breaths he looked behind him, seeing the house disappear when Jared turned the corner and he wondered if he would ever be back there again. They closed in on the city limits and just when Jensen saw the _welcome back_ sign he heard his phone go off and Jared slowed the car down as Jensen fished his phone out of his pocket.

"It's from Mackenzie," he gasped when he saw it.

The words sounded strangely loud in the otherwise silent car and it became even more silent when Jared turned the wheel and pulled the car to a halt on the side of the road, shifting to face Jensen. Taking a deep breath Jensen let his fingers slide over the screen, bringing the message up and he stared at it for a few long moments before he managed to gather himself enough to read the text out loud.

"I love you and I don't care what the other say. Coming to Cali to visit you, just try and stop me. Gratz on scoring the hottest guy on the street."

Jared burst out laughing and the weird tension that had settled in the car dissipated like smoke and Jensen found himself grinning so wide it almost hurt.

"Oh damn, little sisters can be amazing," Jared laughed.

"Mack's the best," Jensen said, smiling down at his phone. "She's too young to go visit us by herself but... at least I haven't lost her."

Jared pulled him in for a soft kiss, a smooth slide of lips that soon had Jensen’s head spinning both from arousal and lack of oxygen and he was sure he had a somewhat dopey smile on his lips when Jared let him go and started the engine back up. The silence was back but that time it just felt comfortable and Jensen pulled his feet up against the console and settled in to watch the landscape outside, mountains and trees giving way to plains and desert while he traded another few texts with Mack.

"How far did you want to go today?" he asked Jared, shifting around so he was facing his boyfriend instead of the window.

Jared reached out to lower the volume of the radio, tuning down the music that he had put on in what Jensen thought to be a way to give Jensen some space. 

"We're staying in Kernville for the night," Jared answered, reaching out to grab Jensen's hand. 

"Kernville?" Jensen said with a frown. "What on earth is in Kernville?"

"The Bed and Breakfast I've booked us to stay the night at," Jared said, smiling over Jensen.

-¤-

"Well, aren't you just adorable!"

Jensen was sure Jared was biting back a laugh behind him when the hostess of the bed and breakfast reached out to actually pinch Jensen's cheek. 

"And welcome! We're always happy to welcome new visitors. Just please, don't trip over Max while you're here. He doesn't take kindly to that."

Before he could even ask who Max was he jumped when something stroked against his legs and he looked down to see a cat curling its way around his legs, purring softly. 

"Huh," Jared said, his hand on Jensen's hip. "Didn't expect a cat wanting to cuddle you like that, thought you would smell of the dogs still."

"Oh, Max is used to dogs," the hostess said with a smile. "We have one ourselves. You have dogs? You didn't bring them?"

"No," Jensen said. "We're moving to California, so our friend is taking care of them until we've settled in."

It wasn't until Jensen could truly talk about Harley and Sadie as _their_ dogs, openly being Jared's boyfriend, that he realized how much he had missed it over the years and he had to swallow down a lump in his throat. From the way Jared was watching him, eyes shining brilliantly, he was sure that his boyfriend felt just the same way.

"Are you boys hungry? We don't server dinner but I'm sure we could manage a few sandwiches," the owner offered.

"Thank you ma'am," Jared said, always the perfect gentleman. "But we stopped for dinner before we got here and I think we're both ready for sleep now. Early morning and lots of unpacking and all that."

Jensen could only agree and he was rather sure he would fall asleep the second he laid his head down on the pillow, loading the van and then saying goodbye to everything he had ever known could be truly draining and it was all a bit too much to take in so he let the owner of the small Bed and Breakfast push them towards the room, Jared's arm a constant presence around his waist. When he stepped inside though, a lot of the thoughts about sleep disappeared.

"Wow," he mumbled.

Jared waited until they were alone to say anything but then he grinned wide, eyes going between Jensen and the big king-size bed with its cream and blue bed spread that looked invitingly soft and comfortable.

"Maybe we should've booked two nights," Jared said with a smirk to Jensen.

"We _do_ have a bed of our own waiting for us in San Francisco," Jensen pointed out, but he had to agree the bed looked amazing and the room could only be described as cosy.

"Yeah," Jared said and turned around to face Jensen, dropping their overnight bags on the floor and pushing Jensen up against the wall beside the door. "But this room has a spa shower as well. Sadly, the penthouse doesn't."

Jensen arched up against Jared, all thoughts of sleep quite effectively wiped from his mind as Jared's mouth descended on his and a hot, wicked tongue found its way inside to tangle with Jensen's. It amazed him the way his body reacted to Jared's touch, sparks of pleasure shooting out from each place where Jared's hands stroked over his skin, quickly finding their way in under Jensen's t-shirt.

"I'm not so very tired anymore," Jared gasped when he pulled back long enough to tug Jensen's t-shirt off and throw it towards one of the arm chairs beside the window.

Following the garments path he realized that the big windows would give anyone passing outside quite a good view of the two of them, even with dusk setting in and the muted light of the window, but looking out over the garden, the neat trail and the river that looked almost black in the setting darkness he couldn't care. Instead he rolled his hips forward, moaning when he felt the hard line of Jared's cock press against his hips and the two of them stumbled towards the private bathroom, barely prepared to separate long enough to pull clothes off.

The bathroom was cream white and blue, an extension of the room they just left and Jensen made wide eyes when he saw the big shower stall in the corner, easily big enough to fit the both of them even now when Jensen was closing in on Jared when it came to length, even though he couldn't match Jared's muscles. The muscles that were strong enough to still lift Jensen up once Jared had gotten him naked and Jensen eagerly wrapped his legs around Jared's waist and allowed the man to carry him into the shower.

"Jared," he hissed when Jared pushed him against the wall, tiles cold against his heated skin.

He felt how Jared pushed his hips forward, pressing Jensen harder against the wall and balancing him with one hand on Jensen's waist while his other fumbled until he managed to turn to water on. Jensen yelped in surprise at the first splash of cold water and for a moment he thought that Jared would drop him but Jared managed to balance him up and hold him in place and in moments the water turned warm, spraying at them from above as well as from the side. The sensations did amazing things for Jensen's libido, hot jets of water pushing against his back, waist and thighs as well as Jared's hands roaming over his skin, almost as hot as the water itself.

"Finally," Jared gasped, pulling away from Jensen's lips and instead pressing kisses and soft bites against his neck. "Just you and me. It's just us, baby."

A part of Jensen thought he should protest, say something about the silly nicknames that always seemed to slip from Jared's lips when he was turned on, but he was too busy grinding his hips against Jared, his cock seeking friction against the water slicked expanse of Jared's stomach. Jared's words rang so true in his mind, the truth that it was actually the two of them, openly together after six years. Jensen didn't know if it was the fact that it had been _six years_ or if it was Jared's body so strong and pressed up against his that made his head spin. It was probably a combination of it all.

"God, I want you," Jensen gasped, his hands grasping at Jared's shoulders, sliding over wet skin. "I can't fucking believe you…mmmm… can still hold me up like this."

Jared chuckled against his neck, teeth grazing the skin before he bit down hard enough for Jensen to cry out, hoping that they were alone in their part of the house and that no one would hear them. He had no real idea when Jared had managed to grab the small sachet of lube that he suddenly lifted up, ripping it open with his teeth, but it was quite obvious that the man had planned taking Jensen just the way he was then. Water sloshed down over them as Jared shifted Jensen up enough that he could reach down and slick his hard cock. It wasn't often they did it like that, usually Jared took time to prepare Jensen carefully, almost slow enough to be torture, but not this time. Jensen cried out, burying his face against Jared's neck, when the man pushed in, slow but determined and Jensen felt his body stretch to accommodate Jared, muscles gripping tight around the sudden intrusion.

He loved that despite Jared's size he could easily take him even without prep, a slight burn there but no real pain and when he managed to relax, Jared pushed him down all the way. Jensen tried to move his hips, but the position gave him no real leverage to move, and instead he clung to Jared, allowing the man to move him just the way he wanted.

"Fuck, Jensen," Jared gasped, big hands sliding down to cup Jensen's ass, lifting Jensen up and then pushing him down again.

All Jensen could do was work his muscles, clenching down hard around Jared as the man moved him up and down the hard length of his cock until Jensen was lost in pleasure, orgasm slowly starting to build. The water pressure against his body, and Jared's mouth covering his made him whimper into the kiss.

"Love you," he managed to gasp out. "Jared, I love you so…"

He didn't get further because Jared shifted him, his cock pushing right against Jensen's prostate and the orgasm ripped through him, fast and hard like a shock wave. He felt his whole body lock down, cock spurting between their bodies and the come washed away by the water. Jared swallowed up each little sound he made, tongue fucking into Jensen's mouth at the same time as the man held Jensen still and fucked into him hard, a dozen deep thrusts before Jensen could feel the come filling him up and Jared's hands grabbed so tight on his hips that he knew he would have bruises to show for it. He had no idea how long they stayed like that, wrapped around each other and with Jared's cock still deep inside him, but when Jared pulled out and lowered Jensen to the floor, his knees felt too weak to carry him and Jared chuckled softly before he pulled Jensen closer. Jensen was surprised the water hadn't gone cold by the time they cleaned up and managed to get themselves.

-¤-

Jensen blinked up at the white ceiling above him, sheets tangled around his legs and waist and he wondered if Jared had pushed it down during the night, his boyfriend seemed to always find a way to get to Jensen's bare skin after all. 

"Good morning," Jared mumbled beside him and Jensen smiled, turning to face him on the bed. 

"Morning," Jensen greeted around a yawn.

"I think they start to serve breakfast soon, we should get presentable," Jared said but instead of getting up he moved closer to Jensen and lifted one big hand to brush it through Jensen's hair in a gesture that was as familiar as breathing. He could see there was something Jared wanted to say, but it seemed like the man was struggling to find the right words for it and Jensen took the time to push forward for a soft kiss, morning breath be damned.

"Are you ready?" Jared asked quietly when Jensen pulled back.

Even without the serious look on his boyfriend’s face he knew that Jared meant for something more than just getting out of bed and for a moment he expected the pain to come, but instead all he felt was a pang of sadness when he thought of what he had just left behind. Chris would be coming to school with him within a few weeks and even if a small part of him could understand his family, there was no way he would ever give up Jared.

"Yeah," he said with a smile. "I really think I am."

The start of college was still several weeks into the future and Jensen knew he had more important things to think of, an apartment that despite his dorm room would be his true home. Together with Jared. 

If Jensen had been asked when he was twelve what he thought his life would look like, it wouldn't have been what he had now, but then, what did a twelve year old know?

-¤-


	12. The Final Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jensen has graduated college, and while some things ends, other things are just about to start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Age difference (Jensen 22, Jared 32-33), mentions of past underage

-¤-

Jensen smiled when he looked across the street towards the campus where he had spent the last four years. Sometimes it felt weird to live so close to the school, seeing it every day, but for the most part his college days had been a good time and he didn't mind being reminded of it. Besides, he loved their apartment and there was no where else he would rather live. He just wished he actually had more free time to spend there, since he had landed the internship at International Gay and Lesbian Human Rights Commission, and wasn't that a mouthful, he felt like all he did was research or write, hours upon hours taking in articles from all over the world.

Lost in thoughts and glancing towards the campus he didn't really keep track of where he was going, coming to an abrupt halt when he crashed right into what felt like a human wall and it was close that he fell before strong hands landed on his hips to steady him.

"Hey now, head in the clouds?"

Jensen looked up into hazel eyes and he smiled when Jared pulled him closer, fitting their bodies together perfectly and Jensen let one arm reach up to wrap around Jared's neck.

"Sorry, yeah," he said. "I was just... thinking."

Jared followed Jensen's gaze when he looked towards the campus and there was a knowing little smirk on his lips when he looked back.

"Do you miss it?" Jared asked.

"The school or the dorm room?" Jensen laughed, letting Jared guide him towards the entrance to the high rise and both of them nodded their greeting to the door man. "Because I think I still have nightmares about those beds, they were _not_ made for anyone taller than five feet."

Jared chuckled and nodded, he hadn't spent much time in Jensen's and Chris' dorm room, but what little time had been had mostly been spent complaining about it being so cramped. There had been a reason Jensen had spent almost every night possible at Jared's place. And it hadn't _only_ been about sex.

"I meant school in general," Jared said as they stepped into the elevator. "I feel like we haven't talked about it much but I remembered when I started working, it's quite a contrast to studying."

"Tell me about it," Jensen sighed and leaned against the wall of the elevator while the numbers above the door ticked upwards with the rise of the elevator. "I'm almost longing for exams. No, wait... I'm not."

It wasn't until they were in the penthouse and he could finally drop his bag that he remembered that he had something to tell his boyfriend, but before he could get a word out he was tackled by a golden ball of fur.

"Jesus," he gasped and once more Jared managed to steady him before he fell. "Lia, hey girl. No, down baby, down girl."

The golden retriever was almost tripping over her own too big feet in her eagerness to greet him and Jared and Jensen fell down to his knees to give her a proper hello. When Harley and Sadie had passed on two years earlier he couldn't really imagining getting a new dog, it would have felt like cheating on them, but then on his graduation day Jared had given him Lia. The exuberant puppy won his heart in an instant, he just wished he had more time to actually spend with her. 

"She's missed you," Jared said and there was something in his tone that told Jensen that Lia wasn't the only one that had missed him. 

"Yeah," Jensen said and pressed a kiss between soft ears. "I've missed her too. Both of you. It's just...a lot to do right now."

"Hey, hey," Jared said and knelt down beside Jensen. "I know. I'm not blaming you for it, I never would. I'm so fucking _proud_ of you. I even saw one of your reports quoted in the newspaper the other day. Jen, you're amazing!"

Jensen smiled at that, pride swelling in his chest. With all the uproar about Prop 8 he really did have quite a bit to do, but as exhausting as his job was it was also rewarding in a way that school had never been.

"I wanted to tell you something," he said, fingers still stroking over golden fur and Lia yipped happily.

Jared shifted to sit down on the hallway floor, back against the wall and Jensen smiled at the weird places they ended up talking about important stuff since they had a puppy to cuddle all the time. 

"One of the local stations is doing a piece about LGBT groups on Friday," he said. "And it seems like Ellen wants me to be the one they talk with from us. I'm going to be on TV. I mean, if that's...if you want me to... A lot of people will see it and..."

With a laugh Jared reached out and grabbed Jensen around the neck, pulling him close and silencing him with a deep kiss. 

"Stop being so nervous, of course I want you to do it," Jared said with a fond tone. "We stopped hiding four years ago, why would I have a problem with this now? Hey, maybe I'll even record it so I can send a copy to Chad."

His boyfriend always seemed to know what to say to make Jensen's lingering doubts disappear, leaving him feeling slightly silly to have had them to begin with. Lia let out a little growl, clearly displeased with them not cuddling her anymore and when they got up from the floor Jensen lifted her up and carried her to the couch instead, sitting down with her on his lap. 

"It means I'll have to work really hard to get prepared this week," Jensen said and Jared nodded his agreement, walking into the kitchen and coming back with several take out menus.

"I figured," he said. "What do you wanna eat? Thai? Hamburgers?"

"Or we could actually cook?" Jensen suggested, slightly amused. 

"Did _you_ remember to pick something out from the freezer this morning, so that we actually have something to cook?" Jared asked with a raised eyebrow. 

"Damn," Jensen sighed. "Thai then. Oh and Jay?"

"Yeah?" Jared answered, pulling his phone out from his pocket. "I will have some free time next week. Got Thursday to Sunday off."

The smile he was rewarded with was brilliant, Jared's dimples cutting deep dents into his cheeks and Jensen longed to reach out and touch them. 

"Really? Wow, that's... Jen..."

Jensen knew full well why Jared was so pleased with that, with his boyfriend's birthday being that Thursday in question they would actually have time to celebrate it on the right day and not only on the weekend like they had first planned. 

"I thought that.. well, your family is coming out here for the weekend so maybe we could go out dancing on your birthday? I mean, if you want to?"

-¤-  
-¤-

The words alone were enough for Jared's blood to run hot in his veins and he tugged Jensen closer, fitting his mouth over his boyfriend's and licking his way in between soft lips. 

"Seeing you dance?" Jared said with a smirk. "Best birthday gift I can imagine."

Sometimes it still amazed him to see the blush that crept up Jensen's cheeks at times, knowing what he did about the young man he would have thought that Jensen would have long outgrown the heated cheeks but that never seemed to happen. And Jared wasn't one for complaining, not when Jensen looked up at him from under long eye lashes, making it impossible for Jared not to kiss him. 

"Maybe we should order that food?" Jensen asked some time later when when Lia let out a little huffing sound and jumped down from his lap, clearly annoyed at her daddies not giving her the attention she wanted. 

"Yeah," Jared agreed. "Food, right."

It was another five minutes before he could get himself to stop kissing Jensen and even then his gaze lingered on his boyfriend while he called in their order. Jensen was back sitting on the floor, scratching Lia behind the ears and it seemed the puppy had forgiven their previous neglect if the happy _thump-thump_ of her tail was anything to go by. Already Jared was looking forward to spending a few extra days with Jensen, since his boyfriend had graduated and landed himself the quite coveted internship at IGLHRC Jared didn't see as much of the man as he wanted to but on the other hand he had never been more _proud_ of his boyfriend either.

"Mack sent me a package the other day," Jensen said suddenly, looking up at Jared with a smile. "I think it was random old things of mine she managed to dig out, and there was something I thought would make you smile."

"Oh?" Jared asked, following Jensen when he got up and walked into the guest room and opened the closet. 

The items that Jensen picked up had a wide smile breaking out on Jared's face and he reached out to take the neatly folded garments from Jensen's hands.

"Your uniform," he said, fingers stroking over familiar clothes that he hadn't seen in years. "Wow, this brings back memories."

"It does," Jensen said and despite the smile on his lips Jared could hear the sad undertone. 

He knew that Jensen missed the scouts, it had been just one of all the things the boy had chosen to give up in favor of being with Jared.

"Any regrets?" Jared asked.

"God no," Jensen said without a seconds hesitation. "It was never a choice, Jared. They don't approve of gay people, I wasn't about to lie just to... It was never a choice."

Jared looked down at the uniform in his hands and he couldn't hold back the wicked grin as a thought hit him.

"Think we could manage to score one of these in your size? I could be up for a bit of role playing..."

"Pervert," Jensen said fondly and took the clothes from Jared's hands, putting them back into the closet.

There wasn't really anything Jared could say about that, he knew himself well enough after all. The mere thought of once more having Jensen in that uniform, down on his knees in front of Jared was enough for his cock to harden in his jeans and he could see his own want mirrored in Jensen's eyes.

"The food will be here soon," Jensen pointed out, but he still took a step closer to Jared.

"Wouldn't want to shock the delivery guy," Jared agreed.

He was just about to ignore common sense in favor of dirtying up his boyfriend, but in that moment a sharp little yip reached them from the door and they turned around to see Lia looking at them curiously. 

"Hold that thought?" Jared asked, smiling when Jensen nodded and took a step back.

It amused him, how needy and _wanton_ Jensen could be, but he would never do anything more than some making out in front of the pup, the blood already pooling on his cheeks once more as he adjusted himself discreetly just as the door bell rang out. 

-¤-

Jensen was fidgeting by his side, his fingers fluttering from the hem of his soft green shirt and then up to shuffle through the papers in the binder he was carrying before rising up to rub at his neck. The tension in his body was so obvious that Jared was surprised that the man wasn't vibrating with it. 

"You'll do great," Jared said so quietly that only Jensen could hear it. 

"What if I forget what I'm supposed to say?" Jensen asked, flipping through the pages once more. "What if I say something wrong? And then they will quote me on that forever and..."

"What if you say something right and they quote you on _that_ instead?" Jared suggested.

Jensen swallowed thickly before he shifted slightly, fitting himself closer to Jared's side. Jared smiled and held his young boyfriend close, pressing a kiss into the soft strands of his hair. 

"Jensen, it's time."

Jared looked up to see a red headed woman looking at them with a soft smile on her lips. Four years out in the open and it still took Jared by surprise to see such open approval from the people Jensen worked with. Even in San Fransisco some people looked at them with scowls on their faces but whenever Jared visited the IGLHRC offices all he ever met was support. 

"Already?" Jensen asked, voice sounding squeaky. "Ellen, I don't think I can..."

"Yes you can," the woman said and practically dragged Jensen from Jared. "I chose you for a reason, Jensen. You _know_ this and once you get over your nerves it will all be good."

Jensen didn't seem able to even get words out but he smiled and clutched his papers to his chest and with one last kiss for Jared he turned and walked over to where the reporter was waiting for him.

"You're shining with pride," Ellen said, nudging Jared in the side. 

"He's amazing," Jared said, looking at Jensen as the man slowly relaxed where he sat talking to the reporter. "Thank you for giving him this opportunity."

"I never _gave_ him anything," Ellen said, following Jared's gaze. "He's working so hard, he earned this chance. I do hope he will stay with us after the internship, he would be an asset to our team. And considering how you're doing here in town I'm guessing you two want to stay around."

"That is the plan," Jared smiled.

"Good," Ellen said. "Anyway, I need to go. Oh, and Jared, Jensen mentioned why he wanted a few days off. Happy Birthday in advance."

-¤-

The music was loud, making it almost impossible to talk but Jared didn't mind it, not when it meant that he had Jensen pressed up against him like a second skin. 

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you."

Jared laughed at the words Jensen hummed, lips pressed against the shell of Jared's ears and each word came on a puff of hot breath. A low groan left Jared's lips when Jensen pushed even closer, hips rocking forward and Jared could feel the hard length of the boy's cock pressing against his thigh. It had been months since they last had time to visit the clubs, something they both had found that they loved doing once Jensen got old enough for it and Jared didn't think he would ever get enough of his boyfriend's hips moving with the music, slender body on display. He could feel eyes on them, heated glanced sliding over their bodies and he let his hands drift down to grab Jensen's hips, tugging him even closer before his hands drifted around to spread over the rounded swell of Jensen's ass. 

"Good birthday?" Jensen asked during a lull in the music.

"Of course," Jared answered, grinding his hips into Jensen's and smiling when he saw the boy's mouth go slack around a soft moan. "How could it not be when I get to have you like this?"

Jensen's smile was pure sex and Jared felt his cock harden even more in the close confines of his black jeans, cursing his boyfriend's obsession with having him dressed in skin tight clothes when they went ouHe didn't really mind it though, not with Jensen's own clothing being just as tight, even though he was amazed that the boy's jeans even stayed up on his slender hips and they seemed to be more artful rips than actual fabric. Jensen's body was fluid motion, sinuous rolls of hips against his and Jared groaned before he lifted one hand to cup the back of Jensen's head and pull him in for a kiss.

Jensen was practically writhing against him, body and hands in constant motion and Jared knew full well that each touch was designed to make him lose control, to make him _take_ and _claim_ in a way that he couldn't do right there on the dance floor no matter how much he wanted to. He wanted everyone watching them to know that Jensen was _his_ and his alone. There was no doubt in his mind that Jensen wanted the very same thing, his young boyfriend had a possessive streak a mile wide, he was just better at hiding it than Jared was.

"They're watching," Jensen breathed against his ear once they pulled apart. "All wishing they could have what we have."

Sometimes Jensen didn't bother hiding, and that was enough for Jared's cock to throb with want and without thinking he took a steady grip on Jensen's hips and lifted him up.

"Fuck," Jensen yelped in surprise but he was quick to wrap his legs around Jared's waist. "Patience isn't your thing, is it?"

As far as Jared was concerned he had been plenty patient, they had been at the club for hours and most of that time Jensen had spent grinding against Jared in a way that was nothing but foreplay and Jared really thought he had held out long when he had wanted to fuck Jensen the second his boyfriend had stepped out into their living room dressed in his barely there jeans and a tank top that was at least one size too small. The smudged eyeliner was just the icing on top of the perfection that was Jensen.

"You're a damn tease," Jared growled, hands sliding down to grab Jensen's ass so that he wouldn't drop him as he made his way towards the backroom.

Jensen just smirked and for a moment Jared had a hard time grasping the fact that the young man wrapped around him was the same one that could blush so easily at a few compliments, the same boy that he had seen grown up over the last ten years. He barely heard the catcalls and whistles that followed them when Jared carried Jensen across the dance floor, his entire mind focused on Jensen and the fact that he _needed_ to get somewhere he could feel Jensen around his rock hard cock. 

"Jared," Jensen moaned, soft lips closing around Jared's earlobe and a shiver of pleasure ran through him at the soft touch. "Want you."

It wasn't their first time at that particular club, not their first time making their way down the corridor to the dark backroom, but each time sent rushes of adrenaline through Jared, his arousal being pushed even higher by the sounds in the room, flesh on flesh and moans that made it very clear just what was happening. The lights in the room was dimmed but it was still easy to see the bodies moving together, hands grasping and lips meeting. Even with people being busy with each other, Jared knew they would have eyes on them; people came back there to watch as much as they came there to fuck.

"Jay," Jensen gasped and rolled his hips down, searching friction against Jared's body.

Jared pushed Jensen up against a wall, knowing full well that the spot he had chosen was one of the most well lit ones, he wanted everyone to see just how gorgeous Jensen was like this. A low whine left Jensen's lips when Jared lowered him to the floor, pushing one knee in between Jensen's to spread his legs until Jared's thigh was pressed against Jensen's crotch.

"Oh...uh...please..." 

The sounds were too soft to carry far, but Jared didn't care about that, those sounds were for him alone and he loved coaxing them from Jensen. Having Jensen trembling under his touch was wonderful, but the time had long passed for teasing and instead he spun the man around, fitting himself up against Jensen's back and smiling when Jensen right away pushed back against him. 

"So fucking needy," Jared mumbled in his ear.

Jensen didn't protest, just arched back once more and whined softly when Jared grabbed both his hands and held them above his hands at the same time as he pushed his hips forward, hard line of his cock riding Jensen's ass through two layers of jeans. 

"Want me?" Jared asked, going still behind his boyfriend. "Want me to fuck you, right here for everyone to see?"

"Yes!" Jensen answered quickly, looking back over his shoulder and Jared's breath was swept away at the sight of Jensen's eyes glazed over with lust and his lips slightly parted.

When the boy's tongue flicked out to lick over full lips, that was it for Jared and he claimed Jensen's mouth despite the awkward position they were in. Jensen whined again when Jared's hands left him in favor of unbuttoning first Jensen's jeans and then his own, only pushing them down enough to get skin on skin. In his peripheral vision he could see people edging closer, trying to get a better view and he wanted them to see, wanted to show them what would never be theirs. 

Jensen braced himself against the wall, hips rolling back against Jared in what was a clear invitation and Jared let his hands drift down to spread Jensen wide. He wasn't surprised when his fingers searched and found Jensen already slick and slightly open. He should have known that Jensen had expected this, had prepared himself for Jared before they left their apartment but the mere thought of Jensen having been ready for him the entire time they had danced, Jensen's body pressed so tightly against his, was enough to drive him insane. 

"I don't even need to stretch you, do I?" Jared growled. "You _want_ to feel it when I spread you open around my cock."

"Yes," Jensen whimpered. "Fuck, yes. Do it."

Despite wanting to just shove inside, sliding deep into Jensen with one hard thrust, Jared would never do anything that might hurt his lover and ignoring Jensen's pleading words he fumbled into his own pocket and pulled out a small sachet of lube, slicking himself up quickly and then pushing two fingers inside Jensen to spread the remaining slick there.

"Jared," Jensen groaned. "C'mon and fuck me already. Please. Show them who I belong to."

With a wet sound Jared pulled his fingers free, wrapping them around his own cock and guiding it to the small, slick opening. Pushing inside Jensen was pure pleasure, tight walls clamping down around him and Jensen threw his head back, moaning loud enough for everyone to hear.

"You belong to _me_ ," Jared gritted out, half-way inside of Jensen's tight ass. 

"Yours," Jensen agreed, a low keening leaving his throat when Jared held him still, letting him get used to the stretch.

The moment he felt Jensen relax around him, hole no longer so impossibly tight, he slammed himself all the way inside with one hard thrust that was enough to make Jensen cry out and tremble, nails clawing against the wall. 

-¤-  
-¤-

No matter how many times they did this, the first burn of penetration was always there and Jensen was glad for it, it made Jared filling him up feel so much more real, the burn making him feel every inch that was buried inside of him and Jensen tried to find something to hold on to, to give him leverage enough to push back against the cock inside him. Jared's body was big and strong behind him though, and Jensen could do no more than moan and let Jared use him what ever way he wanted.

Not that Jensen would ever complain, not with Jared fitting so perfectly inside him, spreading him wide open and even without movement Jared's dick felt so _good_ that it made Jensen sob out in pleasure, desperate for more. 

"Please," he begged. "I need more. Jesus fuck, Jared. Fucking _move_ already!"

Jared chuckled behind him, a deep, rich sound that made the cock inside him move in very interesting ways and Jensen shuddered when Jared made a teasingly slow roll of his hips that made every nerve ending in Jensen's body come to life. 

"Jared. Christ. Do it, fuck me. C'mon Jared. I need you to, want it so much. Want you to fuck me so hard I can _taste_ it, so hard I can feel you for days."

He knew that his pleading got to Jared, felt the man lean forward and rest his forehead against Jensen's neck for a few long moments before he pulled out, an incredibly slow movement that had Jensen protesting and pleading for more at the same time. He already knew it wouldn't be one of the long, outdrawn fucks though, they were both far beyond that point and he knew Jared wanted it fast and hard as much as he himself did. The thoughts were confirmed when one of Jared's big hands came up to cover his, holding it flat against the wall at the same time as the other gripped his hip and held him in place at the same time as Jared snapped his hips forward.

From the very start, the pace Jared set up was brutal, hard slaps of skin on skin that pushed all the air from Jensen's lungs with each hard thrust until all the people watching were forgotten and all Jensen could think of was the feel of Jared's body pressed up behind him, his boyfriend’s hands on his body and the perfect slick slide of Jared's cock inside him. 

"Jared," Jensen gasped out, a particularly hard thrust pushing him harder against the wall. "Love... you..."

He twisted his head to the side, wanting to see the man behind him but instead his mouth was covered by Jared's and a tongue fucked in between his lips in a perfect rhythm with Jared fucking him and Jensen didn't care about the position, about how he had to twist his body to keep the kiss going, because all he wanted was what they had right there. He wanted everyone to see just how much he loved Jared, and how much Jared loved him. 

Jensen was on the edge, each snap of Jared's hips making his cock brush right over Jensen's prostate and the orgasm was building, curling its way up his spine and all Jensen needed was a bit _more_ but Jared's mouth on his prevented him from begging for it like he wanted to. All he could do was use his body to let Jared know, so he circled his hips, moaning into the kiss when the motion made Jared's cock brush against new places inside him. 

"Fuck, "Jared gasped against his lips. "Jesus fuck, Jensen. You drive me insane. So god damn gorgeous."

The man still didn't give him what Jensen so desperately needed and Jensen clamped down around him, letting his inner muscles work the length of Jared's cock. That made the man behind him react and with a deep groan Jared shifted, fucking into Jensen even harder at the same time as one hand reached around to grasp around Jensen's dick. Jared's mouth slid from his, instead tracing down his jaw until that clever mouth found the sensitive spot just below Jensen's ear and teeth scraped over thin skin. 

Jensen threw his head back, crying out his pleasure as his whole body shook with the force of his orgasm. The groans filling the room didn't only come from him and Jared, he knew that the people watching were enjoying the show but all Jensen could focus on was the blinding pleasure shooting through him and then the way Jared's big cock twitched inside him, seeming to grow even bigger before Jensen felt the first heat of come filling him up. Jared's hands was strong, stroking him through the orgasm and Jared was shivering, legs feeling all too weak to really carry him and it was only Jared's body pressing him against the wall, Jared's still-hard cock inside him that kept him up.

"Jesus," Jensen moaned softly. "That was..."

Jared chuckled behind him, circling hips slowly and dragging even more pleasure from Jensen's pliant body, making him gasp and arch back into the touch until it all became too much to bear. 

"They're all watching," Jared whispered against his hair, pressing soft kisses down the side of Jensen's neck. "All wishing they could get to have you but they never will. This is all they will ever get to see. Everything else is mine."

The possessive tone of Jared's voice sent new shivers down Jensen's spine, shivers that ended with a low cry when Jared slowly pulled out, leaving Jensen all too open, too exposed. It seemed like Jared knew what he felt though because he carefully pulled Jensen's jeans up from where they had been tangled around his thighs and with tender movements he got Jensen presentable again before he reached down to tug up his own jeans that had only been pushed down enough to free his hard cock.

It felt weird to be dressed when he could still feel Jared's come inside him, knowing full well that he would still be all slick with it once they got home and there was no doubt Jared would make the most of it, take Jensen at least once more before they fell into bed, tangled around each other. 

"I love you," Jensen smiled when Jared turned them around, tilting Jensen's head back until they were kissing, a slow slide of lips that took Jensen's breath away and he wrapped his arms around Jared's neck, molding their bodies together. 

"I love you too," Jared says. "How about I take you home, and then fuck you again in our own bed? I know you'll be all wet and open for me."

"I like this idea of yours," Jensen smiled, allowing Jared to pull him out of the room and Jensen smirked when he heard disappointed groans behind them.

"You have fans," Jared commented with a grin just as they stepped back out into the more well lit parts of the club, 

"I think we both do, Jensen mumbled but it was too quiet for Jared to hear it. 

Making their way through the crowd of people Jensen couldn't wipe the wide smile off his face, it wasn't often they had time enough to spend time out like this but Jensen loved when it did happen, loved that he actually had this. That he had Jared and no reason to hide it all away any longer. Kissing Jared in public was something that would never get old and Jared's arm around his waist had a grounding quality to it. 

After the heat of the club, the warmth of Jared's body pressed up against his, the chill of the night air made Jensen's skin pebble and for a moment he wished he would have put more clothes on but then he felt Jared slotting up behind him, a wall of warmth and strong arms wrapping around him. Wrapped around each other they managed to hail a cab and practically fall into the back seat, ignoring the low grumble coming from the cab driver and barely pulling apart long enough to give the man their address. 

-¤-

Worry sat like a hard lump in the pit of Jensen's belly and no matter how much he tried he couldn't get it to dissolve so instead he tried to busy himself with preparing sandwiches since he had promised Jared there would be some sort of lunch when he got back. Got back from the airport with his family.

A part of Jensen knew he shouldn't worry, and Jared would probably be surprised if he knew just how nervous Jensen was, but even after four years of Jared's family knowing about him, Jensen was still worried each time they would meet. Somewhere deep inside he was scared of loving them too much, he had already lost most of his own family and he really wasn't sure he could go through it all over again. His phone rang sudden and loud, moving across the counter top with its vibrations, startling both him and Lia who had been half asleep on the floor, clearly hoping for Jensen to drop some of the cold cuts he was working with. 

"Hey," Jared said. "We're almost home, just wanted to give you a heads up."

"Okay," Jensen said, putting plastic wrap over the plate of sandwiches. "Do I have time for a quick shower?"

He heard a low groan, barely covered by a cough and despite his nerves he couldn't really hold the smile back at the obvious little reaction from his boyfriend and his attempt to try and hide it.

""Uhm, we're only ten minutes out so that might..."

"Right," Jensen said with a nervous laugh. "Then I'll just...uhm... I gonna answer this e-mail I got from Chris."

"How is he?" Jared asked and Jensen smiled, feeling himself relax at the obvious care in the man's voice.

"Good, he said that they're getting a few gigs, and he got some interview with one of the reservations as well. Really, Chris would be the only one to even _think_ about combining music and Native American studies, but apparently it works for him."

Jared kept him on the phone, asking him questions and laughing softly when Jensen told him some of the stories Chris had mention in his latest e-mail and it wasn't until he heard the front door open that he realized that ten minute had passed and he looked up to see Jared end the call as he stepped inside. Before Jensen could say anything Jared walked over to him, pulling him up off couch where he had been sitting, laptop on the coffee table in front of him and soon he found warm lips covering his own.

"You're not supposed to drive and talk on the phone," Jensen managed to get out, knowing full well how breathless he sounded. 

"I didn't," Jared said, stroking a strand of hair away from Jensen's face. "Jeff drove because I wanted to talk to you, keep you from freaking out."

It seemed like Jensen wasn't as good at hiding his frayed nerves as he had thought and he was just about to say something when the room suddenly exploded into sounds.

"Jensen!" 

Jensen found himself dragged away from Jared and wrapped up in Sherri's arms and that hug was enough to make some of the tension drain away.

"It's so good to see you," Sherri said, smiling brilliantly as she took a step back. "And congratulations on the internship!"

Both Jared's parents had congratulated him over the phone but apparently they felt the need to do it again because the next moment Jensen found himself in a second hug, that one from Jared's father, before he was passed along to Jeff and Megan who both told them how happy they were for him. 

"See," Jared said when the main focus had switched from Jensen to Lia, who wagged her tail so eagerly that Jensen thought she would strain something. "Nothing to be worried about, they love you."

"I know," Jensen nodded. "It's just..."

"Yeah," Jared said softly.

Jensen was quite sure Jared wanted to say more, wanted to comfort the thoughts swirling in Jensen's mind but he remained silent for quite some time, even though Jensen was quite sure Jared would bring it up later when it was just the two of them. He could feel Sherri's eyes on him and he was sure Jared's mother knew what his issues were; as much as he loved his life in San Fransisco, sometimes it still stung that he had lost most of his family over it. 

"Mom considers you one of the family," Jared said. "She has ever since that first Christmas."

Jensen squirmed at the memory of the first time he had ever met Jared's family, how awkward everything had been for months until that first Christmas and how the Padalecki family had proven to him just what family could mean.

"You are, you know," Jared said, remaining silent until Jensen looked up to meet his gaze. "One of the family I mean, you're _my_ family. You have been for ten years now."

The last words were just a whisper, meant for Jensen and Jensen alone, because there were some things about their relationship Jared's parents just didn't need to know. 

"Boys," Sherri said, ignoring the fact that at thirty-three Jared really was too old to be called a boy. "Will you two come to Texas this summer? It would be so nice to spend some quality time with the both of you."

"Actually," Jensen said, tangling his fingers together with Jared's. "My sister start UT this fall and she asked if we could come visit once she's settled into her dorm."

"Well, the more the better," Sherri said with a smile. “And you let that girl know that if she ever needs some time away from the dorms, our door is always open."

Jensen smiled and when Jared sat down on the couch, pulling Jensen down on his lap, he didn't even bother to protest, instead he ignored Jeff's amused look and Sherri's fond smile in favor of wrapping his arms around Jared's neck and allowing himself a soft kiss. Sometimes he missed the family he had left behind, but when it come down to it, he would do the very same choices all over again. 

The journey had started when Jensen was only twelve years, he had no plans of letting it end.

**\- - End - -**


End file.
